england america and australia: separated by a common language

The #1 cause of teen-age pregnancy in the U.S. continues to be 'sex', which is followed closely by alien implants and visits to D.C

A trip to the emergency room begins with a single step.

Dismantle all goverments, give the power to the people to rule their own lives..they'll be too busy taking care of their own business to bomb other countries

spiritualism is good, what do you mean doesn't work? Ever see a dying atheist? yuck.

HongKong is to China as what Hollywood is to America

did you know that the 'Smurfs' is chalk full of sexual innuendos?

Survival of the fittest. You want some shit ripe with philosophical discourse, just turn on some cartoons, man

Stuff words down my throat... The west plants cobras to kill the downtrodden.

You can always tell a Religionist when they respond to direct questions of fact with florid declarations and finish off with statements such as 'And if you don't believe THAT, you're FOOL!"

There is no west and east ..there are no groups or neiborhoods...there's no vfw and there's no pta...there's only lonely people...all alone and one day closer to death and grasping for a glimmer of love and beauty and HOPE...that's it...hope love and beauty

Some people need to procreate

Ahh.. there are always people out there who dissagree just because oprah wonfrey mentioned at some time that it means cheesecake or some other nonsense

teenagers - the number one source of virginity in the world.

time is linear, and memory is a stranger, history is for fools and man is a tool in the hands of a determined universe

We exist in a world where the FRfear of illusion is real...

(Quit: Trench coats.$80, 6 propane tanks.$850, Sawed-Off Shotgun.$300, Semi Automatic Assault Rifle.$450. The look on your classmates' faces... Priceless.....)

my cousin ed thinks he's a talking horse

Actually.. what could be MORE American than Spam? It's rude, obnoxious, capitalism at its finest

a shrink once told me ALL addictive behaviour is an attempt to self-medicate depression...

the 11th commandment: thou shalt be unaware that the lord your god is just kidding

the christian view of god is about 100000000 diferent views

the bards were revered for what they did not what they were..

I am so arrogant to know that I am certain in my understanding.

"Look at me, I'm different. *slap* "Now you've also got a broken nose."

A guy in my English class referred to one of the character's affairs in the book we were reading as 'pounding the beaver' in front of the class. hehe

every now and again someone tells me I look vaguely like a young keanu reeves...my usual response is to insult their genetic heritage

masters you know how you were saying you worried about teenages with piercings because it alluded to the stupid mistakes they would make as adults... what's that say about you?

I blame white people for all my problems. Two in particular: my parents.

Diogenes is trying to make a point by being a smart ass. and we're missing the point because we're too full of ourselves to listen.

oh, damn! It appears that the slimey, slippery stuff smudging the earth's surface is arguing about its significance again..

IRC has just not lived up to your lofty standards, has it?

1+1=2 minus seventeen percent on payday...

Besides, horses are strong. The best time to beat them is when they're dead

Go into every computer in America and implant a virus that will crash it when the year becomes to 2000

y2k fun: Go to an ATM machine wait till you get a few people around you then scream oh my god the ATMs are just spewwing out money!

the best sushi is the one that you get poisoned by and almost die

the best japanes restaurants have a sign by their door with the number of clients that died

My cat is named Frederick the Not So Great

My female cat is named Catherine the Not so Great

I am so pro-life that I will kill that abortionist

you never hear of card carrying nudists... I just suppose that would be silly.

Philosophical: "Speak one's mind, no one listens. Fart, everybody hears." -- Why so?

population control AND an end to hunger: EACH ONE EAT ONE

An infinate number of Rednecks, firing an infinate number of shotguns at an infinate number of stopsigns will eventually reproduce all the great works of literature- in braille.

It's people like you who give people like me a bad name.

this is a colon ===> : this is a colon with a tumor ===> ; this is a colon on drugs ===> &

my ex-girlfriend is technically a paedophile. That was VERY good, believe me.

(Quit: I have found away to make plain earth taste like mom's homemade apple pie. Now when people tell me to "Eat their dust," I won't mind that much!)

Fox Trot, The Far Side, Calvin and Hobbs, and Dilbert are produced by some of the greatest minds in history.

Did you know that if someone mentions popcorn in a chatroom that 20% of the people there will go make some popcorn within an hour

As I walk, I shrink in the direction of my movement. I also grow more massive. Time, as displayed by my watch slows down. Once...in a very very VERY great while, your car will pass through the brick wall of your garage and you will awaken to find it parked outside. sound impossible?! all of these are based on scientific facts.

In any case, if he's a mac addict he doesn't deserve to remain in close physical proximity with his penis. no offense intended, of course. this is just a generalised attack upon macs in general

haha, I'm a Quake 1 genius. This is my one true talent.

(Quit: Fun Things To Do In Church: Mark places in the Bible or hymnal with religious-themed Far Side cartoons.)

(Quit: Written above a urinal in the University Of Canberra Refectory's male toilet: "Anyone can piss on the floor. Be a hero, shit on the ceiling.")

I think socialism is concerned mainly with the distribution of wealth. Capitalism in the creation of wealth and communism in both.

Why not ask, 'how can i best relate to the way things are?' That way, your God question is answered implicitly, AND you'd get some practical advice.

I think Americans are brainwashed... But only because I'm an American, and have consequently been brainwashed to think that I've been brainwashed.

(Quit: when People say "I made a prog that crashed windows" everyone just stands around staring at the person blanky and say "hey, i thought those came with windows for free...")

only in america can you meet people who have experienced so much carnage who are not at war

Everyone's secretly elitist? In that case, no one's above being above something.

i could swear when he was a little kid he fell in a vat of liquid speed.

"This Product Contains Olestra. Olestra may cause abdominal cramping and loose stools. Olestra inhibits the absorption of some vitamins and other nutrients. Vitamins A,D.E. and K have been added."

I do not wish to associate with the kind of person who likes me

I think the Internet is about as Stable as the empire state building if it were built on Jello

Life is pain-management

i grew up reading magazines, not literature

"As the Y2K is about to plunge our civilization into an era of darkness and total destruction, visit motel 6 before it's too late and watch as the apocolypse ravages the world outside your clean, warm motel room -- or not."

here's a painful truth: Humans are more attracted to the bold power

geez. and i thought my dogs considered me 'alpha-bitch'. i rather liked that...

I'm on my way to proving it. I will set the world afire with what I plan to do.
set your pants afire with methane, instead. it's cheaper.

america does not need to engineer pests... it already has 300million

Hey, the reason the Aztecs caved in so easy, was that the European physical race fitted some of their stories about Quetzelcoatl, so they thought when the Spanish got there, that they were their Second Coming . . We will do the same thing when the space aliens come wearing Jesus masks...

jesus = je suis = I AM

windows help file: for all problems, press ctrl+alt+del 2 times

(Quit: Life isnt a rehersal, well at least I hope its not, I'd hate to go through potty training again.)

internet porn indicates that there could be heaven

I say 'kill them all' and rewrite the textbooks so as to not feel guilty about it 200 years later

(Quit: Don't flood....save water)

(Quit: "The Founding Fathers in their wisdom decided that children were an unnatural strain on parents. So they provided jails called schools, equipped with tortures called an education." -- John Updike)

nirvana=moksha=satori=fried chicken

shrinks ought to be horsewhipped imho (so , did u like your mother? - yes - - that's $200, see me next week)

(Quit: Remember, during Y2K, your neighbors can only get you if you don't get them first. Good luck, and happy hunting!!!! (Brought to you by your friends at the NRA))

If it wasn't that I go to hell ..I would be a pagan

heheheh..u can learn a lot from baywatch..like only attractive large breasted women drown... Must be gravity .. .

You are arguing against human psychology. Good luck. About as effective as the '2001 is the start of the millenium' debate.

A truely interesting experiment in human phycology would be to find out how many people would actually kill bill gates if given the right opertunity at the right time :) and how often :)

If you were raised to believe that love naturally precedes lust, your hormones skipped class. They aren't interested in graduating either.

When I asked my Dad about sex, he said, "Son, I've only been laid once, and that's why I consider you the most irritating coincidence under the sun."

Unlike the tooth fairy you cant catch your parents playing god. Unless they're down in the basement muttering 'Let their be light!' late at night.

(Quit: Can u look the devil in the eye and walk away? I have... And I did the same w/ God...My only prob is that I keep walking back to the devil...>:))

oh well. i dont really care. weed would be more expensive if it was legal anyway

New Zealanders shouldn't be destroyed....only prevented from making movies

(Quit: connection cut by a 3' gorilla with a 8' cock and a 4' extension with a red rubber thing going whala whala wala)

Well. that's what i happened. and i don't want it to happen again because losing your connection man, that's like losing your telephone, tv and radio and newspapers all in one.

(Quit: "We cannot expect people to have respect for law and order until we teach respect to those we have entrusted to enforce those laws." - Hunter S. Thompson.)

Thou shall not kill. Thou shall not commit adultery. Don't eat pork. I'm sorry, what was that last one?? Don't eat pork. God has spoken. Is that the word of God or is that pigs trying to outsmart everybody?"

Christian: Unconditional condemnation - conditional salvation

I never disagree only see things from a different position

Suicide and depression come from when you think you can't get laid, in the most absolute sense.

the mispell of one word is correct spelling of another :)

(Quit: China vs the USA, soon in theaters near you.)

if you've got like 99 channels with cable and still nothing to watch, imagine not having cable... argh

virginity is curable

I loved my Nintendo, it was like a 3rd parent

i dont know why the record companies are so pissed of it seemes that 99.9 percent of the mp3s are cutoff and arent worth a damn

(Quit: Having been a christian at one time in my life, I now clearly understand why some animals eat their young.)

someone did an unauthorized biographical film of me. its called 'american psycho'

"MOOOO.... be one with your inner cow"

any signifigance in Hell always being the first thing people say to each other when they meet?

brb - I'm gonna suck on a cow's titty, or gte a glass of milk, whichever is more convinient

seeing more than you want to see comes from changing the variables of your life, not from escaping it

chat channels are like extremely slow loading web pages

you cannot sell your soul, it's not worth anything

Born-again pagan. :)

"People with strong convictions are the easiest to make fun of" :)

I want a teeshirt that says "don't tell me i'm going to hell! I'm already here!"

(Quit: Life is fair, its people who aren't.)

I've tried to turn love on and tried to turn it off and neither works at all

ahh insainity has gripped my mind and my soul and it is there in that i learn who i truely was and there for am.

if wasnt for bad luck i would have no luck

no, I think viagra counts as an anti-depressant

My dad promotes me to have sex.,.,.,.,and on the topic of aids.,.,he said "son, u got to take changes sometimes"

(Quit: Well... we survived Y2K. Aren't you all glad that you didn't do something silly like slaughter your family to put them out of their misery, then place them in their beds and burn your house down...i mean...wasn't that a good new years show in New York?)

Only on the internet will a search for Samurai images turn out nekid ladies :)

i wanna hear a business like walmart use hold music that's heavy metal

(Quit: "You are not your job.You are not how much you have in the bank.You are not the contents of your wallet.You are not your khakis.You are not a beutiful and unique snowflake.The things you own end up owning you.Self-Improvement is masturbation.Self destruction might be the answer." Tyler)

Ted Bundy was the ultimate sociopath. The major difference between Ted Bundy and Bill Clinton is Bundy never got into politics.

well, I also hurt for the sake of humankinds....I play IRC 24 hr a day non stop!

Diarrhea is unpleasant no matter what the season.

In my personal opinion the only think that should result in an auto-kick is use of that stupid "slap with a trout" script :)

(Quit: It's halloween! Wheres your costume?" "This is my costume. I'm a psycopathic killer. We look just like every one else)

* Jardine wonders what would happen if a god tried to approach the speed of light.

(Quit: My goal in life is to create the first child who has over 200000 teachers)

(Quit: i'm the diet-coke of evil-- half the calories and just as sweet!)

correct me if i'm wrong, but adultery is forbidden in Islam, therefore, they'd be duds in bed due to no practise :P

you know you addicted to the internet when your favorites folder is longer than your screen at 1024x768

* SpatialTemporial wonders how many FBI/CIA agents are getting bald from trying to watch certain ppl during splits <BG>

If you are nothing more than your lifestyle, then there isn't a you to judge.

All I know- Is I'd rather be in hell with Ghandi and the Dali Lama- than in heaven with the Pat Robertson.... :)

I want politically correct sex

(Quit: Censorship is the strongest drive in humans; sex is a weak second. -- Phil Kerby)

63 chinamen hip hap hopping in a spaceship bound for the planet tiaaouba to eradicate the infection of herpes

(Quit: If an infinite number of parents, meddling in the lives of an infinite number of teenagers, knocked an infinite number of times on an infinite number of bedroom doors, they would eventually produce the complete works of Shakespeare.... in morse code.)

I'd hate to own a new car that crashed as often as Windows.

I am as young as the man that I feel. <g> That's why I married a younger man!

ah, martini, How shall i drink thee, let me count the olives

My college days were kept lubricated by a famous drink called a Bleeding Jesus -- Welsh's grape juice laced with ethyl ether. :)

Ronald Macdonald is the greatest threat to the human race today....

(that list command is the most brilaint one ever invented. I havn't had to kick a lamer by hand in god knows how long :)

'Souls arent real. Its just something grown ups made up lto scare little kids, like the boogyman and Michal Jackson.'

The pagans lost god in world. The christians lost god in word

religion is a very complex, fuzzy book. Science is a few very crisp photocopies.

I don't put anything - even assassinations - past ANYONE who wants to be prez.

send me money and I'll think what you want me to think

i never judge a man by his color: i judge him by the width of his nostrils!

Korn is the opiate of the masses :)

aren't succubi the ones who have sex w/ you then suck your soul out? think I used to be married to one

Put your friendship on e-bay

5 star means not enough food to fill you up.

you know -- God is the Dom -- everyone else are the subs. Do what the Dom wants -- open up, let Him inside you, feel Him penetrate your life with his injection of Deific Love, become filled with the Holy Spirit. Or else. A trip to the Cosmic Dungeon (hell).

she turn u into gay... wow..a different varian of medusa

Zeus Sued By Disney (AP) - Zues is being sued by disney for forever running the image of The Swan Princess movies . . .

nothings pure in america,.,.not even the 100% pure orange juice

most religious systems are non-upgradable

yes i have the hormons of a jack rabit and the love life of a 90 year old man that can't get out of bed! . . . oh wait 90 year old men that can get out of bed have more of a love life then i do

australians don't have accents it's everyone else!!!

* Izayus runs a computer store so he has to pray that windows does crash alot

(Quit: Don't think 'cause I understand, I care. Don't think 'cause I'm talking, we're friends.)

what are your beliefs? maybe then we can call you psycho too

NATO costs the USA 150 billion a year ... Kosovo was a great return on the investment for Clinton & company ...

I cant even spell inept :) or wait, I just did...

(Quit: I felt completely drained, not filled with emptiness but rather filled with the ghost of emptiness, the residue and remnants of past sorrows that I can no longer access. I am the shadow cast by a hole.)

I am annoyed. At AOL. Something is wrong with it. Not only is it crashing at twice its usual rate of once per every three hours, but it's also working at the speed of a severely handicapped snail that's blindfolded and pointed in the wrong direction.

who is the most evil Hitler, Clinton or any person born in France? Discuss

At the end of he day however the military is there to kill whom ever the politician says to. Not for social engineering. Anything that inteferes with the military's ability to do their job is wrong

the truth is usually a political opinion

(Quit: what if the Hokey Pokey really IS what it's all about?)

ACTUAL BUSH QUOTE: "Well, I think if you say you're going to do something and don't do it, that's trustworthiness."

clinton. gore, and bush.....all hate the thought of a 3rd party candidate who is not bought and paid for

he is a likeable guy, i'll give him that, but he hass the iq of an ice cube

Most if not all successful politicians think the People are morons, and to a great extent they're right. Clinton is evidence of that.

Actually, what I want most is a woman who is more than the sum of her opinions, and who listens with one ear to the world, and with the other to the deep silence inside us all.

personal freedoms are an economic liability

sides, most decision I made in the last few years was which laundry determent might get most stains out, and which soda to drink. Not sure if thats wad freedom is supposed to about.

This nicotine withdrawal is like an internal civil war.

(Quit: the early bird gets the worm. the second mouse gets the cheese. how's your virtuous agenda these days?)

You are lingually requesting that we respect you as a wise and noble person with knowledge beyond what we know that will be useful to us. We are merely performing the service of guiding your conversation into one that acheives this goal by giving you negative feedback.

there is no need of a God, if Quran can be written by humans :)

(Quit: Dictator - a potato with a penis. )

(Quit: WARNING TO ALL PERSONNEL: Firings will continue until morale improves)

I just don't see why it's such a big scandal and surprise that a presidential candidate might be (gasp) lying! I thought that was par for the course.

oh of course.. the presidential campaign is never about who is best, it's about who sucks the least.. *grin*

People place entierly too much weight on words, especially when many don't even know proper grammar !

For many, their religion is just what they've learned to repeat to others. It's like playing a RPG for them. Get together on Sunday in a building, take out the ol' rule book, and play (talk the talk). But the few that I've known who *experience* it talk much differently.

All Monotheistic religions are premeditated perjuries, polished palaver and patently preposterous prevarications propagated to promote and perpetuate personal and political power, piety and pelf

what if someone else could feel your pain, lik etomax and xamot from gi joe?

(Quit: After a while you learn the difference between holding a hand and chaining a soul, And you learn that love doesnt mean leaning and company doesnt mean security, And you begin to learn that kisses arent contracts and presents arent promises.....)

if Gore can a arrange the actions of the Middle East to get himself elected than I have underestimated him and he must become president IMMEDIATELY

catholicism sound slike a realy cool weapon or somthing

I propose we debate whether a boiled egg should be opened at the large end or the small end. :))

makes more sense to stand for power with a policy that you will resign if elected . . . that really screws up the system if yo uwin

God is the ultimate gangster. Nobody ever sees his face. If you don't do what he says, he'll bump you off

"It is easier to argue from a point of ignorance."

Science has proof without certainty. Religion has certainty without proof.

(Quit: Abandon the search for Truth; settle for a good fantasy.)

judaism is the world's first information virus, christianity is the world's first designer information virus

they should get stephen king to write the 3rd testament

I say anything that causes harm to another is unethical..except when it is to restrain someone from harming someone else

beware the lollipop of mediocrity. one lick, and you suck forever.

Anyone else feel like they're living in the "dead" airport, in Stephen King's "The Langoliers"? .... I can hear them munching, as we type! (oh.. wait... that's me typing.)

forgiveness is easier than permission to obtain; hence confession

dos is a language - it has to have a vocabulary:>

Personally, I think windows and voice mail are proof of SOME evil being out there, even if its only a really sick minded bureaucrat with way too much time on his hands

questions are a burden and answers a prison for oneself

How is it possible to willingly not understand something after it is understood?

Ignorance is never bliss, I hate to admit it, but Christ said it best. "Let them become as children." But to become a child, i.e. the ignorant, presupposes that you have become an adult, i.e. full of knowledge. It should happen that all men, shall either end up cynics or mystics, either they will 'learn' (And you must learn) of your own ignorance.

don't you all hate when someone thinks jethro tull or pink floyd is an actual member of the band?

you should know for the record that just as I defend our right to have arms, I also defend your right to smoke crack or beat your head against the wall or anything else you'd like to do to yourself

(Quit: If 100000 monkeys typed for 100000 years after about a week they would have created teh Hitchhikers guide to the galaxy)

Once I went to #KKK and #Nazi and announced to everyone that I was Jewish . . . i got banned in under 1 second

this is the trinity:Trix, milk and the holy spoon

I bet the religion tastes better than the movie

what do you think the 12 steps would be in Religious Anonymous since most of them have to do with God and faith?

I'm not religious partially because I blame myself for my mistakes :p

Human things is that which we touch but cannot feel....Spirit things is that which we feel but connot touch

never insult people. . some will have it in their armory to insult you back you pea-brained twirp:)

IRC, is the acronym for the Internal Revenue Code, thus it is taxing (I admit, Im a dork)

If life was about happiness, i'd imagine evolution would have put more chemicals like the ones found in drugs like ectasy into our brains.

If nobody is perfect than i am nobody

I don't understand why it is so important for advocates for "selfless" behavior to defend the position... we can still have a world of compassion with selfishness... the vain effort to save selfless behavior just seems a little too much like defending a fairy tale to me :-)

I always thank God for napster ;) best thing he ever made hehe

wow I stop talking and the entire place comes to life

Dr. Laura is mostly pretty Mickey Mouse stuff. It's just that if pressed, she turns into Psycho Conservative Fascist from Hell.

"Yes Dr. Laura, my dad was killed in a horrid accident and my mom has cancer. I feel like I'm going to fall apart." "Well, take responciblity. You killed your dad, your killing your mom. Did you have an abortion, becouse abortion is wrong." "Um... DOCTOR... I'm a male." "Oh. Take responciblity."

Talkback shows like Dr Laura and Limbaugh's should be part of the Comedy Channel.

talk shows are breeding masses of stupid people

why do peeps care about others stupid pointless stories. most are jsut about lust and deciet. well I guess it is Shakespears fault. he made the feed the masses plays and people took what he did and made it into a talk show

I wonder if Kuwait would be a part of Iraq today, had Iraq been a major oil supplier and not Kuwait.

israel doesnt need a jewish lobby in washington...but america most definitely needs a US lobby in washington..

I think I'll run for pres someday.. "If you elect me, I'll try to make sure all international conflicts are settled with baseball bats and colored team shirts"

Not much in CNN about intellectual discussions anymore. Thats why I dont listen to it anymore. Except when they show those nude women in their Fashion section. :)

Every day of a war will have special rules.. like "Everyone has to jump on one foot unless they are in a special 3 legged potato sack battle square day", and "For every 3 enemies you kill you have to off a comrade day".

wayne gretzsky is to canada what thomas jefferson and franklin roosevelt are to the US

And I'll tell you why- out of simple shock value. "Canadian Studies? Whats that? WHy'd you get that?" My favorite Answer: Wayne Gretzky. He's the reason for everything. LOL

i thought molson ice was canada's claim to fame

Where is your visual?" "My printer stoped working. You'll find that information on my website." "That info is not on your website!" "You misunderstood your question."

Bill Gates is just Satan's accountant ;)

* teseb thinks C4 when political comes up.... my career councilor advised me to be a political terrorist

and what does an Athiest scream when he climaxes (either with a partner, or self involved)????

(Quit: To take the limits of your own field of vision for the limits of the universe, is just plain silly.)

(Quit: "Knowledge is what benefits. Knowledge is not what one has memorized."[Imam Al-Shafi`i])

I would call a spiritual materialist... a human ;)

human harddrives are not easily formatted

Nations are just overgrown kids in a playground fighting over a sandbox way to big for them

never trust a spiritual leader who doesn't dance

What's a spiritual leader with a closed heart? A politican of pantheons.

if you are around people you love, looking silly is natural

what if the translator of a religious text used a word so different as silly to jolly? how many souls would be lost?

Neo paganism reminds me of the Matrix....but then again, everything reminds of the Matrix

Look to Lao-Tsu or look to my mamma. Reality is beyond any categories and is TOTALLY beyond discussion. But it can be experienced.

Man's mind stretched to a new idea, never goes back to its original dimension.

afraid of heights, i dream of flying.

there is no reality only an illusion of one :)

i dont argue that there isnt a god, but for the purpose of my life he doesnt exist directly in it

intuition is when the logical and the psychic marry

one would think sex would be a very emotive activity that would register high on the telepathic charts

pride comes from a source of insecurity

Welcome to the true asylum, Reality.

yes the LAW only functions in court, morality functions everywhere

"spirituality" must be a higher function than mere rationality

The mind is as a mirror to the soul; and if the mirror is cracked, the light isn't affected in any way

Trying to get somewhere is vastly different that realizing you are already there

(Quit: With a Snap and a pop and he is gone... kracking can be heard in the distance before the 3 rice krispy elfs come out and have breakfast.)

Myth is symbol. Words are symbols. So word based religions are myth

youre going to reivent all of the teachings from 3000 years ago on your own?

Teacher, to class, on what ends up being her last day of teaching.... "For further information talk to your parents or search on the internet using any web browser with the keyword 'SEX'"

physics has little to do with religion but much to do with spirituality

it's better to be kind than to be right

Welcome to Religion 101 ... Feel Free to Argue All You Want. It's All Been Said Before. And Better.

Tonight I'll shave the Mountain / I'll cut the hearts from pharoas / I pull the road off of the rise / Tear the memories from my eyes / and in the morning I'll be gone

can you put lower the cost of this damn fuel here please? i will have to sell my house to go for a one day trip with the car

(Quit: Mainstream psychology is methodologically naieve, conservative and overly descriptive over prescriptive)

everything which holds the value of life in there heart knows that miracles are as simple as life is

politicians aren't our parents.

i think instead of the friendly hello and crap i think the politicians are going to go into the hitman bussness next election

if everyone has guns... don't you think people will be a LITTLE less likely to pull a gun out and shoot someone?

popular vote means nothing

we've had a coke snorting pot head for 8 years i'd say a coke snorting reformed alcoholic is a significant improvement

A human is sacred until birth.. after birth.. we're screwed under Bush's plan

I voted for Gore.. I voted 5 times for Gore.. under all my social security numbers :)

if u have sex than having a baby is possible

with pro-life logic one could say that masturbation is murder

Could you please point out how smoking pot in and itself hurts other people? (Aside from burning your fingers when passing a roach :)))

I thought Comedy Central was actually gonna cover the election this year... but they didn't. Too bad. They missed a golden opportunity.

I know some people that are law abiding, and some that are do-gooders, but never a combo :)

(Quit: The only difference between a grave and a rut is the depth)

Relinquishing power can be the most powerful thing that can be done.

(Quit: If we could just get everyone to close their eyes and visualize world peace for an hour, imagine how serene and quiet it would be...until the looting started.)

(Quit: Me, I tend to jump to conclusions from bridges I burned behind me before I crossed them.)

(Quit: Computers run on smoke. When it leaks out, you know you have a problem.)

"Censorship is more offensive than any foul language"

"I truly believe that you can hold the world in the palm of your hand, just don't forget that so can everyone else." - Kielo Savilaakso

a clean home is the sign of a broken computer

Now that I have given up hope, I feel much better.

Besides a seeming inability to accept much on faith, we often found ourselves handicapped by obstinacy, sensitivity, and unreasoning prejudice

Hey man.. no matter who is prez <cough> the aliens man.. they still control everything man

All societies use coercion, if not actual, then implicit. How is it uncivilized? It seems to be the natural reslt of all politics. Perhaps politics are uncivilized.

*** The_Police_Stole_My_Car has left #religion (if you have seen my car msg me)

it's too easy to point a finger at what we see

mIRC is futile, you will be kicked and booted.

(Quit: till another day brings us one step closer to restful damnation)

as an atheist, you develop a Hell of a sense of humor :-)

what the preachers wont tell you is that god is there for all of us without the requirement that we go through them first, we can find our won way to Him ... we dont need intermediaries

the louder one preaches the less one has to say

haven't slept for 3 days....but I haven't been happier in years. *snicker*

When men talk sex to women, its sexual harassment but when women talk sex to men it's per minute

I'm a practicing Buddhist. That is, I keep practicing, but I can't seem to get the knack of it :-)

you relize you can fit Moby Dick on a floppy disk in plain text format :-)

Such is the study of philosophy---questions, questions--no answers. What good is it?

<mangore`> we are the only creatures capable of giving worship to some entity..
<qwerty_> mangore` disagree. My dog worships me

Each one of us can KNOW from our own experience..and that knowledge is truth...but it is truth for ONE...

Just because someone is nuts doesn't mean they can't have their own beliefs. Granted, they might have more trouble proving they're Napoleon than one does proving their belief in a higher power But not much perhaps

oh my . . . so you advocate s&m as a way to elnightment? j/k

my belief is that God does not REQUIRE....God allows...which is how I define love...God is unconditional...non-requiring...all-allowing

(Quit: Some words I don't care if I ever hear again: Gore, Bush, Florida, Electoral college, recount, ballot..)

(Quit: Spiritual Development is an Inside Job)

dogma neatly categorizes God into bit-sized pieces and I think He's bigger than all of that

if God is love then love is Blind. So is God Blind?

conversion is a sad aspect of many religions. all i have to say bout that

a manly giggle is nothing more than a cackle!

my god has no rivals, just revivals

debating ANY dogma pits that dogma against the other .. if you practice your faith (in your life) then where is the tolerance for other's beliefs?

many try to decipher God's word the clinical way--to memorize scripture, to read scholars' analysis, etc...it is not enough to have the knowledge, but application is needed. It is NOT an intellectual matter but a heart condition. Even if you memorize the whole bible--what good is it if you don't apply it?

God chose humans as teachers, and thus chose humans to deliver the scriptures, otherwise, he would have sent angels with the books and would have expected humans to do the right thing

the scholar idea is simply job security for preachers

do you need a teacher to know what beauty is?

if people practiced their faiths instad of trying to convert others to them these problems wouldbnt exist

I would say love is better than religion any day

when its from the heart it ceases to be an opinion

When the going gets tough, find some other way to go that's easier. --Caltak

Urp, ok my brain can only take so much oral stimulation

From what I've noticed, folks who have concluded that it's important to God certainly think that it's important to God. However, folks who don't think its important to God may disagree.

(Quit: Learn to laugh at your troubles and you'll never run out of things to laugh at.)

I feel I want to prove myself to God, not prove God to me.

"since i forgot how i choose to be here, ill just invent something to past the time"

* Gedit was married to a whimin once

things are not deplorable...they just are

explore the taboos, only then can you know how to burn them down.

<Vestranda> Satori - oh, how about this for a new topic then: "God: Republican, Socialist or Democrat? Discuss."
<Satori> I got a feeling God is more for the green party than the other two big parties ;)

I just hope God doesnt look like Ralph Nader... :) love ya Ralph but ya gotta work on looking less like the environment you support! lol

btw the *romans* killed jesus. the jews werent allowed to crucify anyone.

there are no dumb questions...only circular arguments ;)

no one knows the future, one can know these moments and know more questions

a Loving CHRISTian that discriminates is nether loving nor CHRISTian

they realy should quit bashing the gay and lesban population becus thats one groop of people to never have an abortion

then there is that hole reincarnation thing... if thats true i had to have been hitler for my last life

biggest mistake men make, think to highly of humankind

<^42^> why is it that there are very few ppl that dont read all Holy Books, and not just their soctail or familys
<Gedit> its like chocolate chip cookies .. you grow up and die believing your mom's are the best even thoiugh there are thousands of other recipes just as good, maybe better

an apple is pretty, everyone eats around it and only the pretty parts, no one wants to look to the core, they all throw it away

I spent 2 hours in one group debate definitions with a guy. . later found out he was a junior philosophy major. . .he has just learned a whole bunch of new words.

<matrixdoom> god sucks
<qwerty_> matrixdoom I mean, if you're the sum and whole of creation, who would you suck?

<disgracias> why do people smoke
<Gedit> because nasty people set them on fire

there is a god wherever there is an assembly line that devours men's lives

<eTech> reincarnation isn't good nor bad
<Alcar> would be bad if you came back as a, oh, dust bunny

That's one of those statments that makes you laugh and vomit at the same time

(Quit: "Some argue that hell does not exist, some say it's simply a myth, but I live in this myth and it is my hell, a hell only conquered by death")

I bet if the ballot was like a Bingo card there would have been NO questions about it

Life is a shame and death the only honesty

religious liberal is an oxymoron

Religious nature doesn't make you non-objective on the law... it's not knowing the difference that makes you non-objective.

Awww common! gratitius violence always goes well wtih elections =} Most of the world believes so! ;)

They would never monitor the Internet. Never. They believe in freedom of speech.

If Clinton and Gore were really willing to resort to any means to be powerful, they would just switch to the Republican party

99% of creativity comes from boredom :)

its like a electric fence you are scared to cross but its not on nore was it ever on nor will it be on

No one is stupid. Unless their brain has disorders. They are mainly not as concerned with knowledge as the "smart"

"I'm having such a bad day" "Just think, you could be being burned at stake"

I consider myself an optimistic pessimist with god-like aspirations

i would say the idiot is the one that doesnt know what your trying to say.

i am stupid too... so if I correct you you know something is wrong

parents need to understand that the kids are getting educated as much at home as school...............just by watching and imitation

winbloat. boots in a week and a half and makes you feel bad about not shuting it down properly all the while :)

here is a thing my father has said to me a few times.... you have either two choices..God os real or he isn't... now if god isn't real then it matters not what you do think or believe...but if he is real then is matters more greately than we will ever know in this life.

faith is just a matter of not dropping the torch he gave me to carry

one day in future straight ppl would be treated in American like gays are treated now in muslim countries:)

pure life is shit, what a revelation

<carmex> your life is not a painting
<Sparkie> my life is a Teletoon cartoon, I think :)

I have it! The painter anaology ...The universe is an impressionist painting by God. Furthermore, as proof, God is Picasso. I dont know about anyone else, but I feel enlightened

logic has it's place... and you can try to find proof through any means you think is nessacery, but I have faith that no proof is going to be found :)

A cat has claws at the end of its paws, but a comma is a pause at the end of a clause...

well... if you believe in sin and all that then you are either going to hell or you're gonna lead a very boring life

the idea of something being "beyond our comprehension" is one that many people are afraid of addressing ... certainly in today's culture, which emphasizes personal independence and so forth, it's even harder to accept. One good look at the stars alone one evening is enough, though, to get *most* people to acknowledge the idea that we are not able to grasp the totality of what we see around us

God = unknowable creature, Math has irrational, unreal,and imaginary numbers. God may be irrational. God may be ureal. God may be imaginary.

well... if you're willing to accept popular opinion as a factor in determining the color of your house, why are you not willing to accept that as partial proof of a higher power?

basically you are telling me this: hey, you have to believe that there is a god then you will see the evidence. <-- works completely backwards from science. where you first have the evidence, then formulate theories or beliefs.

forgive me my lack of self-knowledge. i always knew you know me better than i know myself.

destiny is something humans made up to make them feel like their lifes would actually go somewhere

Ignorance == Bliss == Sin?

I often joke and tell folks that I still don't know what I want to be when I "grow up" -- but sometimes when I consider how some behave, I have to wonder about their concept of "growing up".

Anyone ever made love to Spanish caterpillars?

you don't have the right to make me unhappy, and by expecting me to be christian makes me unhappy, your in the wrong

rappers have a msg.... minimal talent ROX UR BARRIER

people get offended when they've got nothing better to do

i wanna smart bomb for stupidity

and this whole base-ten number system doesn't work for me, from now on all forms will be hexadecimal.

'Instinct is a reaction to the basic human inability to say "I have no idea"'

captialism for me is just an updated version of "survival of the fittest" only with cash.

think we shuld get the religions all together for a game of russian roulette . . . which ever one remains is the right one.

<Strickland^Propane> canada burnt washington to the ground
<MarcusAgrippa> excellent urban renewal

You don't have to love people

Well, if returning a book to the library reminds you of S&M, maybe Canada isn't all that bad ;)

That gives me an idea. My next one [an e-mail] will be chock full of sexual inuendo. There will be almost as much as there is in your average Disney film :)

Are we all really power rangers in disguise?

<Haris> i asked yesterday what is Zen to begin with. no one told me
<Satori> Haris: perhaps that is the answer ;)

GOD is the fact that everything exists

<mangore`> Haris: what do you get when you cross an elephant with a rhinoceros?
<Haris> a joke ?:)

I like being poor :) I'm closer to God this way.

if you believe that if god commands rape, murder, incest and it's moral, then it means morality is arbitrarily conditional on his whims.

who needs to die to be an idiot?

it is Impossiable to find pics of Vampires with their cloths on

Being critical is easy . . its offering soultions to the problems thats the hard part.

buy a gun, I hear they are cheaper during the holidays..

I don't really have a point. I'm just typing :)

you use your god to peddle your hate which you wear like an emblem branded in your pale flesh...and your distain is woven like rosary wrapped in lies as it dies on a neon cross

<money-bot> my name is jonas, im carrying the world
<Charin> money-bot - did you drop it on its head at birth? That would explain a lot.

you should have voted for the Natural Law Party. All that Transcendental Meditation would have cured your country.

Gravity is an Illusion, the Universe sucks

i don't need a bomb shelter, because we are for the most part the bombers and not the bombees

<Ted_Olsen> it was a stupid statement, anyone with half a brain knows that isn't the case
<mrman1_> Anyone with half a brain has more pressing matters to attend to

*their* beliefs so conveniently fill their wallets..

if there is anything worse than an ignorant person, it's an ignorant fool.

I cannot describe life without you because if I did I would never be able to live in a world where you exist

they're just trying to take over the world, but who isnt?

<TygerMouse> I think being irritating and invading people is a religion
<Koshh> so... calling tech support is a religion?

oldies stations = the choir of the gods.

(Quit: "The Earth is dying. No, they're killing it and the perpetrators have names and addresses." -Utah Phillips)

My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.

After a quarrel, a wife said to her husband, "You know, I was a fool when married you." Te husband replied, "Yes, dear, but I was in love and didn't notice."

A man said his credit card was stolen but he decided not to report it since the thief was spending much less than his wife did.

If you want your spouse to listen and pay strict attention to every word you say, talk in your sleep.

It's not true that married men live longer than single men. It only seems longer.

i think Apathetic Agnostic would be fun "We don't know, and we don't care"

you are the proof you need for the existance of the Creator.

* Vestranda debates making a "Who Wants to be religious" game show . . "And your religions is X? Is that your final answer?" Bolt of lightning flies from the clouds "Wrong answer. Next contestant please?"

It would be easier to belive if it didnt need so much "faith", ya know that???

life is toxic. Its not what you "take in" that is going to kill you, but what you "give out"

(Quit: "Intelligence is like a river: the deeper it gets, the less noise it makes." - Mark Twain)

(Quit: If we think nothing of ourselves..then who will?)

this is why so many people come in this channel and angrily demand that we tell them "how can there be a god if my prayers arent answered?" .. this is looking at god as if he was some kind of handy convenience store, where we go when we need something.

i was of the opinion that life's a mistake so we may as well take advantage of it

2000 elections in the USA , a hard civics lesson, proving that pain is the best teacher but no one ever wants to attend his classes

lawyer magick - "I x.x, henceforth for the purpose of this conjuration to be referred to as the Magician, do hereby conjure you spirit x.x, henceforth to be referred to as the Spirit by the following names of God, as referenced in paragraphs 25-254 of this document."

i'm only happy when my prozac is working

oog, my mind turns off whenever I see wrestling... it's like a soap opera for men or sumptin'...

You can buy sheets of 32 unvut dollar bills to use as wrapping paper so that you can emphasize the material side of christmas :) Unfortunetly, the sheets of 32 are 50 bucks :)

yes I see your logic in the sensible nature of society.... reducing global war by increasing nuclear arms production

there are people who comtemplate murder as a mathematical exercies the same as calculating a bank balance

people on IRC don't think, they type

columbus did not find my winning lottery ticket

a lot of people look to the stars to see what their life is going to do, but that doesn't mean they are right

how does one keep from passing out while meditating

Delicate, my adoration; like a poisoned meathook.

my religion is lemonade ;) it quenches me...soothes me...fulfills me :) and is so sweet ;)

of all the things Ive lost. I miss my mind the most

I have found that if I say things like "God is decay" I get terrified looks and death threats...

I try to live my life independent of the good opinion of others ;)

math is a fictional construct developed by man to describe observed reality

i am free.. but it will cost ya

apparently all religions seek the same goal. but intolerance and dogmas don't let people see it

politics are about as hard to reach a resolution on as religion :)

We are gears among gears. Moving in an harmony that can only seem chaotic from our perspective. The fullfilment of what is.

<latter> why fight? let the dumb ones kill each other off, and the intelligent ones will come out victorious =)
<socrates^> latter, then how come you're still alive? :P j/k

guns don't suck, people suck, and some do it very well ;-)

NUDIE BARS!! they would be to busy looking at the girls than fighting, I DONT AGREE WITH NUDUE BARS THOUGH

what is more cowardly.. to tell a man he is rong.. or to listen to him?

cool... somebody famous agrees with me. THAT doesn't happen very often

we understand that you've been dropped on your head repeatedly. you don't have to demonstrate any further

Which is the best holy book? ... The one with the pretty pictures

We create a list of possible 'answers' that we are aware of...We slowly strike off each possible answer until one remains. This, we call truth. The fallacy in this is that we assume we know all of the possibilities that should be on that list.

If this is what Life is, I hope and pray there is none after death

free time is largely a bad thing.

the truth is..men and women probably want the same thing: really good pizza

I figure being the Anti-Christ could be a pretty good career--couple times on Oprah, a book tour . . .

#depression can't join channel (address is banned) Now, that just can't be good

any belief not held in moderation is dangerous

<ZarK^AFKsunwalker> gonna head out in to the real life (tm) for a bit.. :)
<Breadstick> zark ?NO RL WILL KILL YOU!!!

Maybe life is just God's version of IRC?

bush, like most politicians, would be overqualified for village idiot tho.

The cpu produces enough heat to warm my sleeping area. i want to build a water jacket for mine

i'm wondering why they don't have "religion can be harmful to your health" stickers on books etc like they do with smokes :P

Jesus was circumcised for your sins<-------ummmmm then why was I circumcised?

"the first online mass murder"= AOL

<VidarThorsteins> ol: rational attackers have a reason. Disco have never seen me before but although call me a dork, just without reason. He must be sick or something
<OL--> VidarThorsteins is it possible you are a dork?

Females are demonstratably superior to men, both physically and mentally. I think the oppressive social role of "woman" was created to keep them from dominating society.

the more I hear about Islam, the more I like it... but the more Muslims I meet, the less I like them

<Philip_Gaston> Gedit.. shareware is basically freeware in our great country
<qwerty_> Philip_Gaston: only among the ethically challenged :-P

well chili in the cans is dog food.. and most of us eat that

they hire football dropouts to do customer care/tech support

Yea, the USA has some good ideas, To bad there isnt any good implementaion of them

Only God can eat 12 pancakes and bacon

why don't we just drive coffins? save alot of time and money...

It must be very difficuly for you to learn, having formed opinions of subjects you have yet to begin to study

Prasie the Sock for it saves your soles

<CF_Dlawso> anyone want to share the meaning of life with me?
<Satori> to remember who we truly are ;)
<CF_Dlawso> thats not it

Zen mind = IRC minus one

*** julie-ooc Quit (Quit: A man is an island, and friendship bridges humanity together. It hurts when bridges burn.)
<Baliadoc> does that mean that she doesn't like it when her friends light on fire?

"Silence is the language God speaks. Everything else is a bad interpretation."

"Your Zen fascinates me, but now and then I wonder if it isn't simply paradox developed into a way of life.'' from the left hand of darkness (Le Guin) .. The actual word is ``Handdara'', not ``Zen'', but ``Handdara'' appears to be the ``alien'' word the author gave to Zen

<jahn2^> 98%of the wealth is owned by 5% of the people we faught a revolution over less and will fight it again
<Alcar> hm, minor problem w/ your revolution . .if 98% of wealth is IN hands of the 5%, won't they have to finance the revoultion for it to work?

<Tokan> dormant hindu? What is that?
<Rome_00> People who are hindu,
<Rome_00> but dont follow it seriously
<Tokan> Can I be a dormant human? I seldom takes humanity seriously

did ya'll know that the new 102 Dalmations movie has to open under a different name in Florida? It's gotta open under the name 97 Dalmations it seems West Palm Beach democrats threw out five of them

<Scratch> I don't have a religion, and i have great peace in my heart
<Vestranda> Scratch - yes, but thats because you're a sinner and will burn in hell for being at peace without a religion. j/k

<jaded_blush{EM}> now tell me Sir why the sex channel mixed with the history channel
<MarcusAgrippa> wow -- you need to study Romans I think

Those who claim "There is no wrong way to eat a Reese's" have never covered one in razor blades and tabasco sauce, and tried to shove it into an eye socket.

<Jeramias> What if none of you exist and I'm the only real person.
<Jeramias> Hello!?!
<Warner> Jeramias then you can pride your self on having an active imagination :)

<Saroc> Whats everyone's religion?
<EoghanRuadhONeill> godless, so Ive been told ;)
<Saroc> EoghanRuadhONeill, so, you are an athiest?
<EoghanRuadhONeill> nah, i think im just catholic apparently.

"If English was good enough for Jesus, it's good enough for the world?" in her defense of why high schools shouldn't teach foreign languages?

There is no evil at work in the world..evil resulsts from our own actions attachments..the only weight of evil is that which we give it.

lol.... we should get together and go cruising around a city, unintentionally ignoring the women who try to hit on us..... the truth of the prior statement is such that it should be made a religious doctrine.....

90% of windows users have only 50% knowledge of its disfunctionality.

a master's degree is something we achieve for when we don;t want to get out of school just yet? :-)

life just isn't worth living if you can't piss people off

"You will not be punished for your anger, your anger is your punishment" was in my horoscope today

you're not required to respect your president. You're only required not to assassinate them

life was so much simpler when I just thought all religions besides mine where wrong.

" be a fool, and anyone who argues with you will look like an idiot"

you know something tastes bad when on the package it gives directions for reheating when it only makes 6oz

(Quit: Man is an ever growing tree. But only he has power over the four seasons, only he will bring spring to himself, only he will bring winter to himself.)

you can find anything if you look

<Satori> if we were to think that we are the body of God...of God...creations, or manifestaions of God...isnt it weird to think of the stuff we have come up with in this human history? remote control cars...lite mayonaisse...mortgages...?
<Gedit> having just signed a 30-year mortgage, i am having problems with that question ;)

was it wrong to have satan... yes.. he tepmts us.. but yet no... because there is no good without evil... there is a balance in all things.. which makes me wonder.. who is above Satan.. who is the evil guy of existance. WOW i never thought of that before. oh man i need sleep

Religion is like politics, whoever you ask, will swear that they're on the right side. =)

here's something to consider. what kind of benevolent god would create lower back pain? that's just freakin sadistic

a friend of mine told me I need to move to a nice country where they have arranged marraiges. I don't think it was a compliment

<Duckjob> Do you think music makes kids do bad things?
<Ecgfrith> yes i think it does.. duh.. why do you think I do bad things

Guns kill people, if you dont believe me, shove the bussiness end of a 45 in your mouth and pull the triger

Nothing like spending your life striving for innnocence lost, eh?

I use the internet as a sign to watch for in the decay of society

(Quit: "I'd rather cut off my own legs, pack the stumps with salt, and crawl around in circles on broken glass than to deal with any Microsoft product for an extended period of time.")

<Nevaeh> I'm blonde whats your excuse?
<GazelemTiger> i am male

your not stupid..you just don't think :)

ok, when I hear the word strap-on in a religion channel, that's my cue to leave :)

girls laugh at me alot :) the alternative is them running away in fear

love, what is love...I'd rather have a creme-filled donut

less abortions = more Democrats

<Truth__> scapegoat , so wts ur nonshizofrenic truth?
<scapegoat> my schizophrenic one is that I am me :)

<Rome_0> is acid adictive?
<The_Dark_Price> no. its too expensive to be addictive

<ISQ> hey i have a question regarding teen violence, do u think that teen violence can be stopped yes or no and why ?
<qwerty_> ISQ: yes... but you'd have to kill all the teens

The most powerful evil geniuses are the ones that aren't credited for being the most evil... because they are deceptive

I tried reading Nietzsche, i couldn't talk about him because i forgot how to spell his name

if there is Man in the chain between the infalliable will of God, to the word of God... then it's going to have error's in it

i say that's why we give teachers apples to make them realise they're naked

(Quit: indeed life is too fun to be wasting it away playing.)

The Universe: One Big Figerprint. Eath: A smudge in it.

<Trynty> lol God are you a woman?
<Godeternal> God is all MALE
<Trynty> sorry...i know a lot of women that think thry're God...or at least all knowing

<Trynty> hey...you can buy Cindy Crawfords eggs why not a whole kid
<Godeternal> her eggs aren't worth frying lol

(Quit: You are escaping reality, depress keys Ctrl+Alt+Del twice to return)

homework sparks creative talent in me more then anything. hell i've been known to clean the house for no other reason then to put off homework.

I'm atheist, when I die I want the money for my funeral to go to a big keg party

* Max_K imagines a virus going "Now don't we just resemble a virus ?"

you never know, using people as ferilizer may be the wave of the future... could yield the best crop ever

humans are the microsoft of nature

If humans are cancer on the earth, the sun needs to give earth some radiation therapy

* qwerty_ can't think of anything more futile than an atheist and a theist trying to convince each other using ``logic'' :-)

i sometimes get this wierd urge to call up video stores and ask what the fee is for not rewinding dvd's

a girl once asked me if I was cheaitng on her. I said no, I'm just "browsing"

men aren't dishonest. honestly

"to err is life, to perfect is death.. and all the rest is living... "

(Quit: I always say I want to live the lottery, and never have to work. I also say I want to rule the world when I'm older. If you ask me which one I have a better chance of doing, I'd tell you to start planning the rebellion.)

if i were paying for service this bad i would demand my money back

language is a way of getting your message to others, if they get the message, who cares if it's mispelled :)

man cannot live on computer alone..but on every utterance of God..lol

ever notice that "fact" = "my or my group's perspective" and "theory" = "anyone else's perspective that is different than mine or ours"?

this is #religion... if we said what we meant we'd all be saying the same thing... ``I don't understand the universe, somebody explain it to me'' :-)

vote for me! I go to church once a week! so much for separation of church and state :)

a woman isn't specially made for you unless she's a gingerbread girl.

Yeah, and I'm heterosexual for the food

Heart attacks are the Goddess's revenge on the people who eat Her animal friends

My computer is my religion and I want to know it's fool-proof :)

* Kantizuni thinks about posting his Subjective Reality theory on his nonexistant Webpage...

Well, that whole "falling into love" thing is crap. It's not like stepping in cow poop

a dead baby wouldnt dry your tears unless it was freeze dried or something

it's fun to tape a custody battle and show it to a four year old and tell them this is going to happen all because of them

I've been slothful for so long... i should change my deadly sin now... Glutton it is.

just think...if women ruled the world...all inanimate objects would be referred to as He

bitching is another totally bad sub for caffeen, but I can always keep it up in hopes it reaches therapeutic levels.....eventually.

i remember drano...it's a thing to clean dishes with

lol.. I was teaching 1st grade once.. and I said, "Well, it's ok to make mistakes" and one girl said, "yeah that's why god made erasers" and this little boy looked at her and got a funny look on his face and said, "no he didn't. the pencil company did."

You know you are a Republican if you only have sex in the dark while wearing latex gloves

I'm trying to be content in my ignorance, but I could be better at it

<Satori> Nevaeh: time spent with nieces and nephews never makes for a boring life :) they are precious ;)
<MrGnash> Of course sometimes after they cut a swathe of destruction through your house things can get boring as none of your electrical appliances work anymore ;)

<KingSerenityNow> what would you say is your best hocky quality? tenacity? hard nosed?
<Motivo> I'm a tough, rabid dog

Love is kool, yeah... I go for love, 49 cent Taco day, and deep down I believe that some day before I die the cubs will win a world series

<GazelemTiger> well I believe our Heavenly father created Adam and Eve.
* Saroc puts his hand on GazelemTiger's shoulder
<Saroc> It's ok, we all have our problems

I just made a crude attempt at humor..don't label me for that...wait until later when I make a jerk out of myself and label me for that

* qwerty sees the outside world as a fictional source of info about tv

(Quit: Children in the front seat cause accidents, accidents in the back seat cause children)

(Quit: Is it just me or does a lightning rod on top of a church show a lack of confidence?)

* gabri_el ponders about the book title: "The loneliness of 20765-4-356547602356761234976"

If you are lucky, or smart, or both, you will combine love and lust... if you are just a normal human.. you won't

Love means cleaning the vomit of your loved ones....

Oxford Dicionary: LOVE --> Finding that special one, clubbing him/her on the head with your big club, dragging him/her back to your cave, and having your way with him/her

youth is wasted on the young.. :)

lust...man...a relationship may start out full of passion..but that fades and there better be something there to replace it :)

I'd die for someone I loved, but I'm through looking for it

it's not about immortality.. it's about living to old age

<Pondering> and heaven is not on earth because ... ?
<Guest83763> Pondering because you cant be in University prior to finishing kindergarten:>
<Pondering> Guest83763: but if you learned fast enough in kindy, you could extort all the other kids and build your own personal university

Heaven is based on favoritism... if it was based on merit.. your dog would get there before you.

"I can't join the army because I believe men should express their emotions by crying and group hugs"

there is no difference between lust and stupidity

* Saroc is semi-immortal....he can't be dead
<Jerome`> Saroc - semi-immortal? Whats that? Immortal except on weekends?
<Saroc> No. I can die when I want to but I never die
<Jerome`> uhm, isn't that a contradiction?
<Saroc> Yes, but no

I doubt love comes from sympathy. It's more like pity with caring for humanity at the same time

(Quit: "Traditionally, most of Australia's imports come from overseas." - Former Australian cabinet minister Keppel Enderbery)

<CSWookie> What is the difference between "occult" and a "true religion"?
<Gedit> donations
<Alcar> CSWookie - public relations

Tell her Im going to kill myself now. right after I wash my hands Im going to stick them in a toaster

even worse.. he did it in his sons BEDROOM, with masking tape on the floor.. who in their right mind even considers the idea of summoning demons in their childrens sleeping quarters..

then again, looking at his summonings and his preparations i honestly do not believe he had much to worry about.. without the LSD i do not believe he would have confronted much..

<^42^> and that was a low point in his life yet, he needed that car remember
<Alcar> a car? someone summoned a demon to get a car?!
<^42^> he was unemployed, and had no money

I once drove by a business called "Astral Travel Agency" LOL

<keanugirl> ok so IS there a way to evoc keanu?!!!?
<^42^> Kænu is a Egyptain God right?

"ignorance is not an excuse"

I worship a false god

<YetiFemme> Never trust a god with small hands.
<ZarK^Horus> why would God need to steal yer wallet?

Tv is my mother, my father, my lover, my cousin...*SIGH* I feel so southern.

Once I caught my teenybopper sister having some semblance of netsex... for the next week straight, everytime I saw her I said "hey ashley, how many o's are in oooooooooooh"

Random Corporate Slogan -- Say no to healthcare, say yes to wealthcare! --

I am not debating my fear! I am very fearful of going clinically insane

<Sin{Away}> Most of the time I'm guessing
<Warner> thats what all of humanity is doing. Some of us just arnt honest about it :)

<GeminiRai> qwerty was saying all the women in the midwest are ugly
<Buddha4Lyfe> yes but the cows sure are pretty

sounds like you ned a personal dis-organizer

One man's unholy babble is another man's web site

I'm wary of any religion that tries to solve all your questions or problems... life's not that simple.

I agree that we should disrespect people that don't respect other people :)

King..you cant swallow christ

God is a sadomasochist.

and others try to teach love through FORCE! Love your fellow man DAMMIT! Love everyone or BURN IN HELL

Hammer of Love ...sounds like a good nick

The only ones who are wrong are the only ones claiming to be right...

(Quit: If only this sunset were 10% prettier, why then I would be happy.)

For some reason even the spirit of God isn't thought to be a replacement for regular bible study :)

Paradise can only sustain 144,000 because it only has enough resources for that many. They forgot to plant more of those trees!

<Vslayer> hey does anyone know if black permanent marker will come out of clothes?
<qwerty> Vslayer: it's called ``permanent'' for a reason ;-)

I don't mind other life being out there as long as they don't want to eat me, control me, or probe my nether regions (or any other region, come to think of it)

Could God make it 90 degrees in the Northeast and -20 degrees in Florida? And if so, why hasn't God done if for fun?

Evolution is a form of Creationism

a wise man once said "SSheltered lives lead to warped people"

I'd give up all my limbs if it meant I'd have no more sex drive

I hate sex, it usually just winds up hurting people

try looking at your hand the same way you look at a women, and stop complaining,you hate sex don't do it.it is easy, look at gays they stop having sex with women,WHY???,cause they didn't like it

options oftentimes seem to be hard to get, since there have to be many if there are any at all

I don't care what you're saying, I care what you said

(Quit: Friends don't let friends drive AOL.)

the world is truly coming to an end when music becomes strictly monetary

You're so annoying that you irritated me while I was away.

[Fundamentalists] resort to outright insults and when challenged just say they can't be blamed because they're just carrying the word of God :) (I guess the word is God is: F___ Y__ :)

people who have faith are inspiring, people who have only religion are irritatin

every jumbled pile of person has a thinking part that wonders what the part that isn't thinking isn't thinking of."

355/113 -- Not the famous irrational number PI, but an incredible simulation!

i used to grow aphorisms, but they kept flowering

"I dont care what anyone says, Steven King is lame. I put scarier things in my Chili."

You are nit-picking at words, which is why you're so irritating. If you actually had anything vaguely similar to a valid point demonstrating conscious and/or intelligent thought, you'd get over it and move on.

my wife and daughter are making lesbian jokes. I'm a little disturbed :-/

Christian rock is an oxymoron :)

<ZarK^Horus> what good is life insurance if your Dead?
<Motivo> zark, money for your family. you know, it's expensive to die now :)

<mangore`> Kalea714:yes--I suppose Adam and Eve said a bunch of "I's" also--Do you get what I'm trying to say? Independence and rebellion is not becoming to God.
<Kalea714> mangore`: are you saying that my piercings are rebellious?

* qwerty (who is admittedly biased) is rapidly coming to the conclusion that Christ was a Buddhist and Buddha, perhaps, a Christian

okay--if you walk like a duck, quack like a duck, swim like a duck---but you say you're a swan---What will happen at "Duck season" (Armegeddon)??

consideration is far different than pandering to their preconceptions, i don't think that's doing them any favours

to be affected by insults is weakness caused my an error within yourself; not in the inslut.

<mangore`> Tonitrus: romans 6:7---says we are acquitted from sin. Remember? Wages of sin is death?..
<Alcar> yeah, the wages of sin is death. So what? So is the salary of virtue. And the evil get to call in more sick days at work

attachment to Buddhism is anti-Buddhist

american isn't enlglish. there is no english, not anymore except in Britain and England and those places

once, the English spoke English, and we Americans spoke English. Then there was a war, and the English lost. So now we speak English, and we're nice enough to let them use the name ``English'' to describe their language, but it's not English, 'cause we won. What WE speak is English :-)

all joking aside, I grew up in Michigan, so I'm almost a Canadian anyway ;-)

Canada is a proud nation, we will always be canadian, not part of the united states. we have milk in a bag and our YAKS RUN FREE!

I think I'm a relative thinker, but I'm not sure, so I might be offended by that statement, but maybe not

<KingSerenityNow> I DONT APPROVE OF BROTHELS!!
<TygerMouse> or Brothel Sprouts

maybe the photos were suppressed 'cause if we knew how Bill was hung it would've been too much for the country to handle?

I totally approve of brothels. If men and women could get their respective rocks off more easily, relationships and marriages would become more about the compatibility of the personalities involved than just an excuse -- as they often are -- to get busy.

<Avatara> I support full sexual initiations for teenagers. Give 'em a red card. They do public service, they get points, they go to the brothels and learn the ropes from professionals working for the government that teach 'em how to use their bodies.
<qwerty> Avatara: I don't think that would work... sex would be uncool if it was state-sponsored :-)

cannibals dont eat clowns cuz they taste funny

you know... some people think that Workd War Three will be written WWIII or WW3.. I think it will be known as www.iii.war

(Quit: the day Microsoft makes things that don't suck.. is the day they make vacuum cleaners)

(Quit: What Is This Real Life You Speak Of, And Where Can I DownLoad It??)

I didn't even think about gravity until this morning when I woke up stuck to the ceiling... ok that was a lie

you'll do as much chasing down the road as you can handle, and then you'll buy somebody's commercial Truth(tm). If you can stay on the road with having your brain explode all over the ceiling, and without buying somebody else's an answer, there IS an end to the road

<Cheese_Messiah> Hold on i've just got to go out and get a packet of fags...i'll be back in 5 mins.
<Tonitrus> I take it he's british...
<qwerty> Tonitrus: I *HOPE* he's British, or he's going to be gone longer than five minutes ;-)

Rationalism is such an irrational philosophy...

in my view agnotics are worse than the religious...at least, religious types have made a decision...agnotics are like strange nomads wandering in a desert of their own making

"Im not prejudiced, I hate EVERYONE!"

<Tandaco> George W is the biggest threat to world peace currently on this planet
<Octaviun> Tandaco, I'm curious. what exactly is world peace? did everyone quit fighting somewhere that I didn't know about?

anybody studying french already has my sympathies :)

(Quit: Whether land or sea or space or sky, all living things were born to die)

I wopuldn't mind seeing a virtual world where people don't go and virtually kill each other...

The only creature i'm communicating with really is lucy the mutt.. and that's cause she wants a girl scout cookie.

Satan's greatest trick was to have convinved mankind that God doesn't exist...

god, are you stalking me?

<Satori> what is ph34r ?
<Kr34ti0n> making people think you arn't intelligent enough or just to lazy to use standard american english
<Kr34ti0n> excuse me "are not"

(Quit: Sex is when a guys communication enters a girls information to increase the population for a younger generation do you get the information...or do you need a demonstration? :-)

dinosaur bones were planted by God to test our faith

"You must believe these preposterous things. Because if you don't you dont have faith. and if you don't have faith you wll go to hell"

I used to know god, we were good friends in elementary school...then we got in a food fight in the lunchroom and he got suspended, he doesn't like me anymore :/

I'm confused... I think you just made my point

I know there will be a great darkness upon the earth... ...and this will be followed by a great light... ...and this will happen every four and twenty hours... ...unless the clocks are put back

if you believe nothing happens after you die, then the worst case scenario is you're right

I respect you because in 200 years you will be a log that thinks I owe it a dollar. that's a smart log :)

can you get a reverse homo-sapienectomy?

<GazelemTiger> how long can i keep potatoes after being cooked, before i shouldn't eat them.
<qwerty> GazelemTiger: depends if you're irish or not

a toaster is a mechanical device intended to burn pieces of bread so badly they are inedible.

* Caltak will in a min, haveta bruch teef
<Baliadoc> cal, how many times have we told you not to type with your mouth full??

my wife is reading a report that says gay teens are more likely to turn to alcohol or drugs, and are more likely to become teen parents. Anybody else see a problem with that? :-)

part of protecting yourself sometimes is not letting anyone in. getting good at hiding it.

Certainly any theory of everything, as it attempts to tie together all the facts about the Universe, would need to jump an infinite number of hurdles to prove its worth

Give a man a fish, and he eats for a day. Give a man religion, and he starves to death praying for fish.

(Quit: Never be afraid to try something new. Remember that amateurs built the Ark. Professionals built the Titanic.)

(Quit: We all travel through time.. the trick is to slow down...speed up or go in reverse :) )

(Quit: Never argue with an idiot. They drag you down to their level then beat you with experience )

(Quit: Some people come into our lives and quickly go. Others stay for awhile leaving footprints on our hearts and we are never ever the same. )

(Quit: Seduce my mind and you can have my body, find my soul and I'm yours forever. )

Law of Cat Composition: A cat is composed of Matter + Antimatter + It Doesn't Matter.

(Quit: "The whole problem with the world is that fools and fanatics are always so certain of themselves, and wiser people so full of doubts." -Bertrand Russell)

(Quit: The wheel is turning but the hampster is dead )

any movie today with charlton heston in it is considered a horror movie, imo

this channel is often intolerant of intolerance.

<Nevaeh> Alcar.. explain your faith to me..hehe
* Alcar believes in the great god known as Chanserv who protects my Name and guards me from harm and my temple called a channel. His lesser siblings meoserv and nickserv also give aid but Chanserv sometimes vanishes when the evil called peer strikes me. Sometimes I suffer doubts about chanservs power and am lagged for my failings

for instance, when I was 17 I thought that adults THOUGHT teenagers were all stupid... now as an adult I *KNOW* teenagers are all stupid ;-)

I grew up in the generation that said "dont trust anyone over 30". Once I reached 30 we changed to "dont trust anyone UNDER 30"

I never thought I knew everything, until I understood that I knew nothing, and then looked back and realized that I though I knew everything, even though at the time I didn't think I knew everything. Read it twice if needs be ;-)

* Gedit turned 43 today and thought he knew everything until he was about 33 .. past 10 years ive known less and less each year, and it's wonderful ;)

<^Kit^> the piano is NOT a form of torture!
<Satori> ^Kit^: you havent heard me play!!

i'm a bit pissed today.. gotta wait till Friday before i get snuffed by Mir

god moves mountains, we just bring shovels :)

Actually, love has to exist. If gravity didn't love us, we'd just float away

mental note: rum belongs in Coke, not in club soda

(Quit: "I sat laughing snidely into my notebook until they showed me a PC running Linux. And oh! It was as though the heavens opened and God handed down a client-side OS so beautiful, so graceful, and so elegant that a million Microsoft developers couldn`t have invented it even if they had a hundred years)

a guy from my hometown tried to sell his soul on ebay...he had a big of $500 before ebay shut it down

why is it okay to take the blame for problems, but not to take the credit for solutions?

(Quit: If you don't like the weather, take a look at your ISP)

{Quit: I don't have a solution but I admire the problem.)

<Nevaeh> you walked into a funeal..
<Ryft> What is a "funeal"?
<Alcar> an online funeral. the spelling error is needed to make it a proper IRC burial.

services were born with one too many sets of chromosomes

Thinking is the most thoughtless things humans ever tried to do

MacGuyver is fantastic, instead of using guns, he takes the peaceful option and blows things up with bombs made out of tomato sauce and dishwashing liquid

<qwerty> SyntaxFault: these days, I'd classify myself as a Zen Buddhist Christian atheist <SyntaxFault> qwerty: I didn't think one could do that.
<qwerty> SyntaxFault: heavy on the Zen, light on the Christian, but ALL atheist :-)

<ZarK^PizzaLove> what is written in thebible about Bread?
<^Kit^> give you a man a stone if he asks for bread
<Alcar> whats the basis behind that?
<zitterbe> Jesus didn't have pizza deal nearby

i have many morals MrGnash, but I keep them locked away in a safe place ;)

A religion is like a ice cream instruction. How fun is it to eat a ice cream after instructions =)

<DancingProphetess> religion, develops in man the ability to listen
<GazelemTiger> DancingProphetess ability to listen, well... in some it instills the ability to talk so much you just want to shoot them.

what i find strangely disturbing about this country is that the government firmly believes tampons to be a luxury item and taxt it accordingly but they're cutting the tax on beer..

(Quit: "I began to study marijuana in 1967... I had not yet learned that there is something very special about illicit drugs. If they don't always make the drug user behave irrationally, they certainly cause many non-users to behave that way." -- Harvard medical)

<Asahal> soz=sorry (to much chathouse in the early years of having the net)
<Chaos`^> I know what it means, I just wonder how you get soz out of sorry
<Asahal> dunno, i neva quite worked it out

we have a standing army so we dont need guns <g>

guns equalized the obvious advantage of a WWF wrestler over a common person

Screw negotiation.. if someone wants to pull a gun on me, they won't have the chance or the hope to negotiate.

<VViseman> Background checks are run on people who go to get guns, and that is sufficient, but they WON'T take away my right to bare arms.
<Alcar> VViseman - ok then. Wear short sleeves. See if I care

Americans will die before giving up their right to bare arms (well, at least alot of them)

guns don't kill people, bullets do

<semute> we should ban bullets :)
<MadCurie> we should outlaw wounds
<VViseman> We should just outlaw criminals

I still say they should limit the manufacturing of bullets and ristrict the amount of amunition a person can own either that or a mass initiative to cut off criminals' trigger fingers

you do not have the right to posses a nuclear or biologial weapon in the US. this would be a sure deterrant for home invasions

<fieldpeas> VViseman, we do have the right to door locks! :)
<VViseman> fieldpeas: How many criminals you hear about going in through the front door.. LOL
<Alcar> VViseman - lots of them. Salesmen, politicians, in laws ....

We all have 2 parents, we all have four grandparents, we all have eight great-grand parents ... So how,if 10,000 years ago (assuming a generation is 25 years) we had 1,000,000,000,000 great ^ 12 grand parents), could there not have been that many people on Earth. Supposedly there was something like 500,000 at that time. Am I retarted?

we should shoot Clinton and Reno in the legs and see if they decide to enforce better gun laws.

actually, I do yearn for a world where all live and coexist peacefully, where none go hungry and none feel threratened... until then, hands off my guns! :)

guns are a social disease, you too can be a carrier.

(Quit: Everyone needs to live in their own little world; but if they don't have the imagination to create their own, they borrow one. Enter religion and enter capitalism. Pseudo-realities which far too many people accept as sufficient.)

I tell my wife: "How can I miss you if you don't leave?"

I think if religion was provable, it'd become a science, and government would dissect God to make weapons.

they should name things after me, then i would use them.

<ZarK^Horus> may you have love before you have sex :)
<alcar> zark - is that taoist? Like hainvg your egg before your chicken? "May you have children before you have sex."

<Motivo> so if everyone wore knee-high socks and tall boots but wore nothing else at all, would it be moral?
<GazelemTiger> no, but i might like it.
<Motivo> what if you were playing with elderly people
<GazelemTiger> Motivo man don't give me nightmares.

hypocricy is good! Its what makes the world go round

check this out... this is classic. Somebody started hitting on me in /msg, and I went along with it, thinking that he thought I was a gay guy, and at the end he turned out to be a she... a lesbian who actually thought I was a gay WOMAN :-)

I don't need any help... I've got three letters from well-known psychologists that all agree I'm better

I'm not trying to confuse you. It's just a pleasant side affect

(Quit: How am I? I'm sitting on a rock, circling the Solar System's largest nuclear device, surounded by 6 billion hairless apes...how do you think I am?!?!?!)

did god get a kid in for work experience when creating earth? i can imagine this kid watching god making animals then god goes to the toilet and lets him have a go, when he gets back he goes "WTF is that? the kid goes "a duck billed platypuss" god says "but you have given a duck fur and a mammal that lays eggs?!?!?make me some tea you little wanker. is that far from the truth?

if noah built the ark in the sahara desert then how did the penguins get there?

<Pollocks_No5> i am a born again athiest
<Gedit> so you proved to yourself that god didnt exist but that wasnt good enough so you proved it again?
<Pollocks_No5> yes
<Gedit> you need something to do with your free time

(Quit: thinks the world would be a better place if everyone took their heads out of their asses for a second and took a look around.)

(Quit: "When the gamemaster smiles, it's already too late." - Anonymous)

let's not start comparing how much we know about each other that we don't know the other one knows... feelings get hurt that way ;-)

you can't teach anybody anything. And I'm saying this as a professional teacher. :-)

shakespeare would kill himself if he saw a claymation dinosaur slumping to the ground dramatically...he just couldn't compete with that kind of writing

you know, I usually cheer for the monsters...I want them to kill the bad actors

<The^^Man> You have the right to remain high, any drugs you take may be used to get high in your own house, you have a right to a dealer, if you cannot afford a dealer we will appoint a friend that you can bum from

heeeeeeeeeerrrrrrrrrrreeesssss a military aircraft, OUR approACH has been 24 amaerican men and women, it IS an international incident. thats me typing as fast as i hear

it's nice not to be stuck in reality 24-7

The only question I want answered is what stingy person thought of 1-ply toilet paper :)

why can't he let the sleeping rabid pitbull lie?

Anything with private parts getting blown up and/or ending up in other locations is designated as perverted

Maybe existance is just working toward stopping.. maybe that is what God is trying to do too

it's like coming on #religion and asking for advice.. you never know *WHAT* sort of answer you're gonna get, but it's generally one worth contemplating :)

<Schloe> Never be afraid to question things
<Alcar> only be afraid when you think you have the answers :)
<mangore`> Okay--do we need to experience ANOTHER aspect of a hot stove being harmful?
<^Kit^> a hot stove being harmful? if it weren't for hot stoves, most people wouldn't eat much.

* Kantizuni is a hypocritical philosophizing anarchistic pro-choice materialistic consumer existentialist. Someone try to convert me. :)

Here is a religious question... what do you do when you're in love with your best friends girlfriend?

Ppl with AOL on their PCs are not into Zen

Anyone idiotic enough to do AOL should pay for their own burial

i believe in god but do not watse my time in any of the subscription services

<Saroc> Kill them all
<Munin> thats a little extreme
<Munin> I find that being smug in my intellectual supperiority is good enough
<^Ice^> he says as he misspells superiority :P

<MrScott> jimmy swaggart was a tv evangelist who was sexually active in a not so moral way and was caught "with his pants down"
<Kelris> I didnt know being sexually active was moral at all *grins*
<MrScott> well, it is if you happen to be married!
<Kelris> tell that to clinton :)

<joey40> Jerry Falwell is a joke
<Jozephski> is he a born-again christian?
<rs-> He's a born again jack ass

a man of faith trying to define science's limitations is like a man of science trying to define god's limitations - both men quickly fall prey to a lack of facts

Urban legend: Coca-Cola mixed with asprin is an afrodesiac -- False but I dunno why =p

<_Susan> You guys r trying to raise interest for a new video game cult ...right ?
<Saroc> None of the religions we are currently talking about have anything to do with video games or cults

what sort of pajamas do nuns wear? the traditional ones, I mean

<Saroc> Is satan really male?
<GeminiRai> satan is female. she lived with me for 6 years

hmmm I think teh Doctors are trying to kill me, for my stupid suggestions to bring world peace, and if no-one is pi*sed off, you will they sell prozac too

There is a fine line between Wisdom and Foolishness.... it is called humanity

Hmmmm I think that I gonna create a biblical inspired porno mag... um the burning bush.... *thinks* this could bring down whhite protestant america

Go and talk about the supposed sanctity of life with a wolverine

Bill Gates: A man whose name reflects on him and his products.... a hole in an otherwise solid structure

"Education is not preparation for life. It is life itself."

<tamaryn> kit, doing great... just getting through nicotine fits, I quit smoking today.
<Broken-Angel> i tried that once. i put 4 holes the the walls. the family voted that i keep smokeing

I think the greatest invention is the pillow

Tech Support: "Actually, the year 2000 problem is this: it seems most of the computer code up until recently had been written assuming that the first two digits in the year of any date were "19." So basically, some of these applications, when the year 2000 rolls around, will reflect "1900," rather than "2000." Of course, there weren't any computers around in the year 1900, and so your computer will simply disappear."

My script has stuff like if($KickedOffline) kill/ban/craplist/kick/freeze/add/revengelist $nick

<zitterbe> My floopy drive got hard
<velcrohead> I think my computer is going through its period though
<zitterbe> Is there tampons for the puters??
<velcrohead> I dunno
<zitterbe> A new market???

<Danny-17> why would god permit someone like him [bush] to become president?
<^Kit^> because what's that sign of the apocalypse? a village idiot will rule the world?

<Vanguards-Of-Conquest> The term "jew" what does it stand for a religion or a race?
<Tandaco> Vanguards: for followers of a religion... jews can be of any race
<Vanguards-Of-Conquest> I wanna kill em all so Im not sure If I want to become a racist or a religious fanatic

<AmberEve> So Saroc your point is ?
<Saroc> AmberEve, my point, now, is that I already stated my point

nah, I don't even believe what i want to put a bullet in the brain of every panda that won't fuck to save his spiecies

its a bad sign when your cleaning the kitchen and the biggest problem is you can't fit all the shot glasses in the dishwasher

I never want to go to Australia. It sounds like Hell.

but behaving is So boring...only the good die young my dear...and at the rate I'm going I'll live to be 237

(Quit: You have the freedom to listen to any type of music you like. Just don't make the rest of us listen to it as well. Turn your radio DOWN!!! - Coalition Against Rude Behavior Associated with Stereo Systems C.A.R. - B.A.S.S.)

I'd rather do Jesus and live than drugs and die

you can thank the internet... without IRC we never would've realized that some people are going to bed at the same time as others are waking up, and we'd have to reason to suspect that the Earth isn't flat

BS=bullshit, MS=more shit, PhD=piled higher and deeper

* zitterbe studied their idiotic courses just to see why a Pepsi can accelerates toward the center of the earth
<MosheEbner> zitterbe - to compete with coke

* qwerty is a dad, but qwerty has his priorities straight. First IRC... the kids can feed themselves :-)
* Max_K sneaks a box of cereal to qwerty's kids
<qwerty> Max_K: don't feed them... they'll become week. I want them to learn how to hunt and kill their food, and you can't hunt and kill Corn Flakes :-P

So how many megahurtz do I have to shriek at to explode a human head? *interested in the practical applications of this new knowledge, of course..*

If the Bible is true - then my a$$ is grass and God is the lawnmower

If God had intended Man to program, we would be born with serial I/O ports.

(Quit: Promote Human Evolution - Fuck A Geek)

Last time we mixed politics with religion, people got burned at the stake

I'm all for a new religion being developed -- one devoted to sex where the priests and prietesses are courtesans that educate folks in the divine mysteries of sacred sensuality.

I love debating religion, that is why I have a black eye and a broken finger atm

If there was a hell, would i go to it for killing my parents....?

"feminism is the radical notion that women are people"

basically a conservative says "everyone must be the same" and a liberal beleives "we're all different, but equally important."

I thought I was a conservative. Until I took an internet test, and found out i was a moderate.

Yeah...categorizing everything. Where are those good old days when you would just go around witht he popular people killing everyone who was different?

Did you tie a cows head to the doors of McDonalds?

and some would say that the scientific method is nothing more than a list of commandments for scientists :P

If ppl can get their photos on milk cartons, why the hell won't pepsi put me on their cans?

closed minds should come with closed mouths.

forced sex.. never.. Alcar is willing he just doesn't know it yet

I think that I'm going to write a science fiction story about a parallel universe where emoticons don't exist.

(Quit: if common sense is so common, why is there so little of it?)

Throwing the omniscient one a surprise party.. probably not gonna happen

vacations always seem so short once you get to the end of them..*sigh*

there are certain parts of the male body I'd rather not think about having the word enter tattooed on.

You must be this tall to ride -------------

the universe is experienced subjectively by all of us. that doesnt mean it doesnt exist.

<Avatara> I can't wait until someone gets up the nerve to create the video game RELIGION. You know, like those sims games. Only in this case, as the player you can control the dissemination of holy books, establish morals, ritual oberservances, social constructs, etc... give it to the people and see what kind of society evolves. Then intensify the mix by adding the possibility of other religions being introduced into the game. You could play as Islam, Christian, Pagan, Scientist, Atheist, or Extra-terrerstial.

a simulation of a simulation game: Sim-Sim

<synthesys> Sim-Sin (virtual prodigal son game. you dont REALLY sin you just pretend to)

my daddy always said, if it isn't a sin you didn't do it right or long enough.

(Quit: it takes just one a minute to have a crush on someone, one hour to like them, one day to love them, a lifetime to forget them.)

<Gedit> DalReligion has the unfortunate experience of being restarted so he lost his seen database :(
<MrGnash> How awful. Which raises the question, as humans do we have the right to take his memories away from him just because he's a cybernetic lifeform? ;)

In your presence even my shadow acquires the sensation of touch.

<qwerty> personally, I don't think we can IMAGINE what alien life would be like if it wasn't part of our evolutionary tree... I mean, look at the difference between a kangaroo and a virus... and they both evolved in the same basic environment in the same basic span of time (cosmically speaking)
<Alcar> qwerty - of course we can! Just look at star trek and star wars and ... uh .... well ... :)
<^Pana^^> Alcar:You mean Star Trek Fans

I can see that happening, aliens coming down and saying 'we can solve all your problems through communism', next thing Bush'd have his finger on the button.

<Jeramias> I love how even the ground you walk on looks different 3d as you walk, in addition to the background scrolling at a different rate. How often do you see that in 2d qbasic games (or even just 2d games in general) :)
<Baliadoc> very true, and you're graphical rendition of the hero as a block speaks volumes about the stereotyping of the hero in today's society

but the fact that heroin addicts' eye pupils are as small as the head of a needle tells me that it makes you stupid

<Nevaeh> don't hate me cause I'm butiful
<Tonitrus> Hate her 'cuz she kan't spell
<Nevaeh> exactly :)

(Quit: "Mass destruction inside a giant walking tank, what more could you ask for?")

(Quit: i was a happy man till i was in irc)

(Quit: Connection reset by an angst ridden Goddess.)

a logical and satisfactory explanation of the universe is beyond humanity, so we have no choice but to think it's absurd.

Debating the existence of god is like wondering whether or not you will have a good relationship with someone. Without faith, nothing meaningful happens.

<Dreeem> Anyone out there belonging to a religion that forbids them from having sex with their current partner?
<Alcar> I must cause I dont have a partner. That would explain it all ....
<Dreeem> Alcar, that would only be true if self gratification was also forbidden <grin>

(Quit: You take your road. I'll take mine. But buddy if you cross that line, that's a real good way, to get on my bad side.)

(Quit: "We all agree that your theory is crazy, but is it crazy enough?" - Niels Bohr (1885-1962))

only christians go to hell

<Jeramias> Hmmm... What evolution isn't.
<Caltak> it isnt a candy bar with a caramel center.

<GeminiRai> Canadian's are secretly plotting to take over the world.
<Alcar> no, they aren't. Im talking over the world tomorrow. Its on my to-do list
<`2w3rp> Alcar is TALKING over the world
<Alcar> oops. well .. I cant take it over now. I can see the headlines now: "Spelling errors prevent hostile world takeover by Alcar!"

(Quit: The arrogant think they know all the answers, the wise wonder if we even know all the questions.)

Televangelists: The Pro Wrestlers of religion.

"If you freeze to death and end up in hell... wouldn't you be really comfortable some point along the way?"

<tzalos> everyday ask yourself in the morning, "am I worthy of breathing on the same planet that Tzalos is on..."

(Quit: There is life and there is death, inbetween is philosophy and faith.)

the jews are still holding out for a doctor as a messiah instead of a carpenter. they don't follow union labor, y'know
<DoesItMatter> nah... I think the jews need a lawyer as their next savior. fight for their cause and all
<Renalis> DIM: Johnny Cochran?
<Renalis> oh wait.. sorry.. he's competing with GW Bush and Koffee Annan as the antichrist

hey.. who thinks the four horsemen might be corporations? :)

(Quit: "Your Highness, I have no need of this hypothesis. " - Pierre Laplace (1749-1827), to Napoleon on why his works on celestial mechanics make no mention of God.)

And God held the holy match... and he lowered the holy match behind him... and he said 'Let there be Light!'... and he let one rip...

'Suck the sweat out of the crack of my A$$... and use a straw!' cousin said that at a kids soccer game... coach kicked him out of the game... I was so proud!

(Quit: "I learned all the rules of the modern day drifter, don't ya hold onto nothing too long. Just take what ya need, from the ladies and leave them, with the words to a sad country song. - 'My Heroes Have Always Been Cowboys')

(Quit: "you can do anything stoned that you can do sober .. you just realize its not worth the fucking effort" -anonymous IRC chatter)

Christian Dynasty, an assemblement of 25 Christian leaders bent on controlling the world and eradicating sex

I've read all the Potter books -- and even organized Quiddich games in my neighbourhood and some classes in 'cooking sorcerey" -- the local minister nearly had an apoplexy over it.

(Quit: (Read error: Peer stole my glasses))

AOL is Satan, mIRC is God :)

Men Fear me... chicks dig me... and small farm animals enjoy my late night company...

I know some folks who think that humans are the slave race created by reptoid creatures to mine gold for their galactic federation and war with the gods from sirus B.

<GeminiRai> I think Hell is like the homeless shelter of the afterlife
<^Kit^> GeminiRai, you mean.. it's run by Christians? :D

<Dark_Raven> the thought of God being an omnipotent being is narrow minded as well
<Tandaco> and powered by MicroSoft

satan isnt a bad guy, haven't you seen south park?

satan believes in god. does that make him christian??

i've finally leanred how to hide the fact that i'm a pervert

(Quit: If everything were meant sexually, life would be one of those funny little ironies. It sucks, yet you don't get any pleasure from it.)

Christianity is not a religion, its a relationship with a book

(Quit: Mircosoft - "If you can't make it good, atleast make it look good.")

technically religion is a figment of everyones imagination(Global Telepathy Inc.)

No, nothing is a conspiracy, everything is as it should be(Global Telepathy Inc.)

"The flowers, the candles, the people--it could have been such a lovely funeral," said Theresa Dutler of Worcester, MA. "But instead the whole thing was marred by the foul presence of death. It's a shame, is what it is."

(Quit: Y2K Jelly - Where you want 4 digits to go where only 2 would go before.)

(Quit: People are like stars:there are bright ones,and there are the dim ones....)

(Quit: There is no good, There is no evil, There is only expression.)

The last time i dabbled in calculus, I kept getting multiples of 6. So never again.

<^Kit^> If *ANY* idea ought to have a day, it ought to be the idea of great mothers... without whom none of us would be here to debate. :p
<qwerty> ``If *ANY* thing ought to have a day, it ought to be the element of carbon... without which none of us would be here to debate.''

religion is like ice creeam instructions... How fun is it to eat a ice creem after instructions?

* Sintaqx has heard of acid experiences such as the one described.... except the numbers were on the speedometer, and they weren't faces.. they were little fairies.... they guy was trying to catch them with the speedometer needle when the cops pulled hm over for reckless driving

you know... I believe it took god 8 days to create the world... nobody could think up New Jersy in just 7 days.

"And on the 8th day, after recovering from his hangover, god looked down on his creation and said, 'Damn, I knew I shouldn't have taken thoes hits of acid.'"

* Vix3949 more dope and my dean will kick me out for good! I cant wait!!!
<LordGlacius> err..ya wanna be expelled?
<Vix3949> yeah...its too expensive. damn!

"We'll get along just fine, as soon as you realise I'm right" ;)

religion: political, corrupt, deadly. and people say nuclear weapons are dangerous

<Motivo> nah zitterbe, we're just an advanced weedy species. the definition of a weedy species is one that focuses most of its energy on reproduction and matures quickly in just about any environment

Hate is like what you do when someone ate the last of the Cheerios

funniest topic I saw was in #xxx-young. the topic was 'Old enough to crawl... Old enough to assume the position'

Love is like alcohol... a little fun followed buy a long painful hangover

Homsi: "Excuse me sir, what time is it?" MAN: "It's 3:15." Homsi: (puzzled look on his face) "You know, it's the wierdest thing, I have been asking that question all day, and each time I get a different answer.

#selfbondage - Drop in, share your ideas, maybe pick up a few, 18+ only. OK... I DON'T get this... if you bind up yourself... who lets you loose?

<gravy> akh dont you hate it when you peel a beautiful looking mandarin and it turns out its dried and shrivelled up inside?
<siddhartha> ouch, do i know you gravy?
<gravy> will you stop taking things as sexual metaphors?

<siddhartha> That's one reason I don't blame people like the Jehovah's for doing what they do. They feel like they know the answer and they want others to know the truth too. they still don't have good reason to fear vibrators, though... cowards
<gravy> are you trying unsuccessfully to be funny or are you talking about the issue of masturbation?

most 16 year old boys are priests. but the word priest is used in a different sense by most of the world.

<UniverSouL> i want to see an angel
<MrGnash> UniverSouL: sorry I haven't scanned a pic yet

<MrGnash> Nevaeh: if people want to seek God, they only need to look within :)
<Alcar> "Hello, I'd like a CAT Scan and an X-Ray doctor. Oh, nothings is wrong. I just want to find god."

whacking off and whacking ppl are two very different things

its ok to be slow...our president is...

remember folks, beer and girls last one night, but syphilus lasts a lifetime...

Just because your deity can't bear market competition does not invalidate the existence of the other gods.

Mice in a giant cage of hopelessness .. we shall scatter in all directions, towards cheese and wheels and waterbottles until god has scooped up everyone of us and bopped us on the head :)

(Quit: "In God we trust; all others must pay cash" - Unknown)

the truth is a very smelly thing.. one must either like it or stay from it...

I've been in a few meeting where everyone at the table makes twice what I do but can't agree on the color of the sky

I earn a seven-figure salary, unfortunately there's a decimal point involved...

if you try to 'show the truth' thats an immediate invite for 'shoving your foot in your mouth'

<Skippingstone> Get on your knees and WORSHIP
<Lucifer-Satan> Skippingstone: ah, so you're into getting oral sex?

my dad, is a programmer, and other than his choice in women, is quite intelligent.

faith is belief in something without proof, not DESPITE proof.

<qwerty> ^Kit^: ``since the cross Jesus was nailed on was made of wood, wood is holy. Therefore, we shouldn't own anything made of wood. Only plastics.
<Nevaeh> we could argue thats why condoms are made out of plastic and not wood even the condom makers recognize that wood is holy ;)

philosophy is like masterbation, mostly harmless, but be sure to wash your hands afterward

For people who read books like Higher Superstition, 'pomo' is a four-letter word meaning 'philosophy I don't like'

anything is better than believe in the myth of truth

given the choice at being labeled a pomo, a pedophile or a politician, I'd have to give it some real thought

ignorance on your part does not constitute error on my part

"The most barbarous and the most fantastic rites and the strangest myths translate some human need, some aspect of life, either individual or dual.... In reality, then, there are no religions which are false. All are true in their own fashion; all answer, though in different ways, to the conditions of human existence." -- Durkheim.

Anything can seem scary when you add "of doom" to it.

<Alcar> Thankfully, the rulers of coutries are never seen as normal ....
<MrGnash> I think among their own group of gangsters and thieves, the rulers are considered quite normal ;)
<Alcar> I'm not sure .... I mean, Clintons methods might be a little extreme. I doubt most mafia dons would start a war in the middle east just to remain as head of a family ...

(Quit: "The more I want to get something done, the less I call it work" - Richard Bach)

I thought you knew better than to call the US a democratic society :) If voting could change the system, it'd be illegal :)

<vix_1> Gnash.....that is neo-genetic politics....there is a correlation, but they are trying to mess around...
<Pagin> hmm, genetic politics ... *imagines religious genetics* "We're sorry, Mrs Farnell, but you are only 45% baptist. The rest of you sees to be Roman Catholic and Agnostic."

I find that its easiest to hang on to my pride and stupidity when its chained up in a wheelbarrow. Then I can just wheel it around with me, and never have to worry about letting it go

"I have issues with anyone who treats faith as a burden rather than a blessing. You people don't celebrate your faith, you mourn it." - from Dogma

If you call hindus religious cattle, is it a compliment?

chastity sucks... show me a person chaste by choice and i see a masochist :P

I think condoms would instill water balloon fights more than sex...

some idiots though feel its a triumph to have sex where others eat their lunch..

actually, if we let all the stupid people rot and die for having low IQs, we'd be out of people to become politicians and run our contries. Then where would be be?

As a meat-eating vegitarian, I enjoy salad.

me call you fat? are you out of your mind??? remember I have sisters..I learn early on NEVER to use the term fat with regard to the female!!! ;)

<poiesis> well god probably gets GOOD acid. he just has to add an o cause he's god!

So man nailed god to a tree and then felt so guilty about it he went and killed some other people as well so god wouldn't think it was personal

<Warner> God made everying. God told man what to do. Man told God to push off. God made life hell for us and then came back and said "Oh and while your at it love each other". So man nailed god to a tree and then felt so guilty about it he went and killed some other people as well so god wouldn't think it was personal.
<Alcar> And god forgave man for killing god and told them they were now all free of sin. But god said, even though its free, you can'you can't get it until you beg for it

is jesus mac or pc compatible? or is he more of a linux guy? i think thats just about the most important theologic question i've ever seen

windows, mac, linux = the father, the son, the holy ghost. it's all about the trinity

I contend that more people would be catholic if the host tasted like poptarts.

<^Kit^> I contend that more people would be catholic if the host tasted like poptarts.
<Gedit> with or without frosting?
<^Kit^> Gedit, what kind of a stupid question is that?

If emptiness is loneliness and loneliness is cleanliness and cleanliness is godliness, why isn't God next to the Windex at Wal-Mart?

i mean hyperspace was never really meant to be used to store monkeys, even temporarily

Mary wasn't really a virgin, the miraculous thing was that Joseph was

sorry god, I will take my pennance now and go stick my tounge in a socket to simulate you striking me

if god had meant for us to type, we would have had 26 fingers

I'm not a solipsist. Although I have convinced a number of people at work that I am... just for fun ;)

"Tell me, I forget. Show me, I remember. Involve me, I understand."

now someone say something before I blow my head off and spear puppies on spikes

Suppose I argue as follows: "Freud thinks everything is about sex. But lots of things aren't about sex, like making money. So Freud is wrong, his theory is stupid, and he is an idiot."

The perfect man. hes sweet, quite, has lots of dough. And when your mad at him, you can bite his head off. The Ginger Bread man!!

it's a lot easier proving that we evolved from monkies, then to prove that Divine Intervention is a gift from god and not just pure luck.

Cna we go to the planet of the bacon men and have the turkeys suck out our bones?

<Aminadabb> How can a female who like to have sex with other females be wise?
<sexy-gay-witch> becuse it means she is not having sex with a male and therefore avoids pregnancy *laughs*

we referr to problems now with our users systems as ID 10 T issues

98% of patients treated with the 'Be happy or DIE!' method have recovered

<supercalofrajolistic> I think power is evil
<qwerty> supercalofrajolistic: how would you run your computer without it?

<Kranke> sorry I haven't talked much
<qwerty> Kranke: it's probably for the best, anyway ;-)

I view the reading of one's own poetry as closely akin to public masturbation ;-)

(Quit: Ok, You are now firing a gun, at your imaginary friend, NEAR FOUR HUNDRED POUNDS OF NITROGLYCERIN!!!)

<Alcar> well, I thiknk the question we have to ask is: Was Mohhammad thinking of god when he was having sex with her? Likely, not. I doubt most ppl having sex think of god at the time.
<qwerty> Alcar: if I was 60 years old and I was having sex with a 14-year-old, I would DEFINITELY be thinking about God :-)

<Nevaeh> often Christians do need to humble themselves and admit they could be rare. could be wrong. not rare.
<Alcar> well done? medium? over cooked?
<qwerty> Nevaeh: at various times in history, Christians have been very rare... usually medium-rare :-)

could burial be considered ``inheriting the Earth?'' :-)

you came to this world with nothing.. and you are taking up space when dead...

Hm, I could see bodies getting sold .... Contents: 1 human body. Warning: Do not shake. Fragile when wet. Components break down upon death, often messily. No refunds. No waranty, expressed or implied, included. Offer void in vacuum.

I once had a guy tell me that the earth got heavier every time somebody was born. he was a senior nco, so I quickly supressed my laughter

If life is a bitch, be a horny Dog

well i think Clinton used a cigar because other objects werent big enough

as a religion channel we speak of everyuthing that has to do with FAITH ... and beluieve me *nix OS's are all faith and no miracles ;)

your question wasn't ``has he been in movies''... it was ``does he act'' :-P

acting and being in movies was a contradiction I thought I mean, Reagan was an actor .. but I bet his best performances were in the white house

there is no god but pikachu and ash ketchum is his prophet

anyone who would become a psychiatrist is certifiable.

(Quit: Eternity is the wrong side of a locked bathroom door.)

* qwerty doesn't want children either, and will happily sell his to anybody who can make a good offer :-)

I just think it's a really *#$ed up form of logic.. "if you love it, set it free, if it doesn't come back to you, damn it to eternity in hell."

<_k1dx_> why isnt anybody discussing anything???
<bodingo> we were waiting for you and the unique body of life experience you bring to each issue. esp. your experience as a Chilean expatriate and death camp survivor

<Caltak> good is relative.
<Warner> really? good is something I rarely assosate with my realatives :)

if anybody here feels they need to be deprogrammed after being exposed to ^Kit^'s Church of Anti-Scientology, I'll be holding a seminar on Saturday. Book your reservations now, I expect the hotels to be packed

Henry Rollins said it best... he said: 'I wish I was bi-sexual... I could walk into any room... look around... and just go... Yumm...'

"God sets the ultimate example of laziness. At least 6,000 years ago, he worked for six days and, as far as anybody knows, has been on vacation ever since''

cult: religion I don't like. Heathen: member of a religion I don't like. Pagan: member of a religion I don't like ;-)

somebody just defended the ``where are the missing link fossils?'' by pointing out that even though the umpteen million Jews were lost in the desert for 40 years, there's no fossil evidence that they ever existed. :-) That's the cleverest riposte I've seen in weeks :-)

screw the calories... I *WANT* to look like Orson Welles when I grow up :-)

* qwerty gets along with his wife perfectly. She agrees with everything qwerty says. Qwerty would spend more time with her, but she's been having to spend most of her time in the freezer since she's started to spoil

<Alcar> well, if a man wantsto be irresistable to women, he should become chocolate :)
<Goddess55> hrm...i dunno about that but i do know too much chocolate will make my tummy hurt...so i guess you really do have a point

followers of orginised religion are like 6 yold bed-wetters. You can't really DO anything about them, just hope they grow up and STOP ;)

<Sintaqx> Patience is a Virtue.... too bad I'm Sin :)

<YetiFemme> If you love something, set it free. If it doen't come back to you, it was never yours. If it comes back, it will always be yours. If it just sits on your couch and eats your food and doesn't appear to realize that you'd set it free in the first place...
<Alcar> YetiFemme - then you married it? :)
<YetiFemme> No, you kick it to da curb. ;p

am I an athiest, if I have faith in God?'

<Humpy> im the 8th dwarf

Scene: Sigurdir holding up a disturbingly cute dragon's head for an angry Odin. Odin is speaking. Caption: "That was the wrong magic dragon who lived by the sea! I told you to kill Fafnir, not Puff!"

this is why california is having rolling blackouts. because IRC users don't know how to log off.

"Jesus is God because he says he is. And God can't lie. Therefore Jesus is God."

why is the KJV copyright 1952 Division of Christian Education of the National Council of Churches of Christ if it's the literal word of God ?

the notion that God is male is ridiculous although that would explain the follies in the universe

If I were to find this girl who had just died but she was still warm (she is REALLY nice) would it be ok for me to take advantage of her?

<xwhiteshadowx> So she does something.
<Alcar> The queen's a figurehead. Thats something. Every car needs one, so nations do to :)

<Alcar> The promises are lure to get the fish/voters biting. Then you reel you catch in, find you won the big prise and then realise that the net has lots of holes, the boat is in bad shape and the fish are likely endangered ..... *shrugs* A politician is someone who will say anything to get elected, imo
<xwhiteshadowx> Which is why we should vote for the party with the stupidest policies - if they don't care about getting elected, then they might

<m80> m80s have been banned in reality, and with my help they are becomig banned in virtual reality

<Nevaeh> mirror mirror on the wall.. who's the fairest of them all..
<Alcar> Mirror: "You're face is spotty, you're covered in grime, I cannot tell you at this time." The queen gets out her windex :)

(Quit: "We came, we saw, we idled." - Keith)

(Quit: lets not talk of love and chains and things we can't untie)

capital punishment is a good thing, because the Romans practiced capital punishment, resulting in the crucifixion of Jesus and thereby assuring that mankind was forgiven our sins, even those of us who support capital punishment ;-)

give me a dollar and I'll teach you how to be a more moral person :-)

"Whats the easiest way to hurt a man? Give him all hes ever wanted"

The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live

If God dropped acid... would he see peoplec

Why doesn't dyslexic look the same backwards as it does forwards? If I dog is dislexic, does he think he's God?

Why do they ask you for your drivers license when you by liquor, if you can't drink and drive

god created dinosaurs, god destroyed dinosaurs, god created man, man destroyed god.

Whenever I hear that "She blinded me with science" song, I think of an attractive woman in a lab coat throwing chemicals into some poor geek's eyes.

<YetiFemme> You could go play frisbee at 1 am in the park... alone... *creepy handmotions* b00gah!
<Kantizuni> Yite: Thats not a bad idea.. i don't have a frisbee though... *frowns* I could pretend I have one... *muses*
<YetiFemme> You could also pretend you have clothes on...

I saw some pictures... that led me to believe a person could have a lot of fun in a park at night with a lawnmower...

I just found an upcoming sci fi flick that refers to the characters as being ``from the 21st century.'' I wonder how many more times we're going to see THAT particular mistake before Hollywood figures out how to count? :-)

God is one's belief that you are inferior :)

people get mad when you ask if one of the requirements to be an op is to posess a penis no longer than 2 cm.

Yes. I have died of laughter many times. But then I remember that I'm a teenager, and likewise unstoppable, so I get up, wipe myself off, and get on with my life.

"Due to recent cutbacks, the light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off."

(Quit: If a tree falls in the woods, do the others laugh?)

WHen they built the Chunnel it could truly be said that England sucks and france blows

can't I just be a stand-up philospher?

when I grow up, I want to be a Pagan apologist

I thought all Americans were Homer Simpson

The Great Don says: Yes. I have died of laughter many times. But then I remember that I'm a teenager, and likewise unstoppable, so I get up, wipe myself off, and get on with my life.

Why is it that a search for "evil rituals" turns up with online shopping links... *growls*

Jesus was carpenter. I wonder if he ever built crosses. Wouldn't that be ironic?

I think you are what happens when children play too many video games, myself

hey, is K.D. Lang a man or a woman? I can't tell. It sounds like a woman but looks like a man.

brainwash him from the assert-that-God-exists cult to the assert-that-God-doesn't-exist cult.

(Quit: "Bah-pa-pa-pa-pah, bah-pa-pa-pa-pah, di-yet coh-lah." -- Spears, Britney, " An Inquiry on Cultural Values.")

<dbthewise13> Walmart's getting sued *groan*
<Paco_DeQuink> what for?
<anne-ooc> that happy face caused people to go insane
<dbthewise13> Supposed Gender Discrimination
<Jeramias> Supposed? No, it really is happening. They wouldn't hire me because I put down "other"

'God made germs when things began. Germs made fish and fish made man. Man made God and on they ran, Back to days when things began.'

I like women. Half of my ancestors were women.

I think the aliens are backwoods country folk.

<CryptAngel> I have no mind or a soul. I've been a slave since man's dawn. My kind is murdered on and off, to everyone I serve to their death, and buried with them, then I die when the casket shut...... What am I?
<Yite> Microscopic parasites in the lower intestine.

dead people are here, although i have no sixth sense, im just really stoned

everything ive said since 1993 has been one long discordian haiku

never piss off the guy your dating if he steals cars for a living

reading about Zen is like dancing about architecture ;-)

question: is it possible to, through extensive practice and conditioning, learn to lick your eyebrows?

last time I trusted democracy GW got elected

if God is a man, then he's forgotten to ask for directions.

never throw the bathwater out with the baby

<zitterbe> Avatara - let's do some weird eastern stuff
<Avatara> sure, I'm game -- shut off your mind, just be, only operate instinctively, breathe, eat, sleep, excrete, go primal -- if in doubt of how, sit in front of a wall for 7 years.

what's your opinion on cow tipping?

90% of the population aren't as smart as my cat.

you can assign every Operating system in the world to a political system. you can even associate them to religions to a certain extent :) Mac OS's are similar to the Hari Krishna fanatics you see in large airports :)

he's in there going at it about how he finds it insulting that CHristians say Jesus is the only way yet he doesn't understand that I find it insulting that I get cut off on the innerstate but I don't follow the people home to complain about it

I'm sorry.. I'd rather have my life in -my- hands. Not in the hands of Susie Q. Doctorate who's spent the last 8 years reading the teachings of a man who's convinced I"d like a penis, thanks

I don't tell you how many kids to have, don't tell me how many stories I can fall down.

I'm not insane. I'm just not blind.

but it's nice that christians seek wisdom. after all, we must pursue what we lack most...

* Nevaeh apologizes the male gender is not the equivalance of pigs.. pigs are actually clean :P

no america is not short for USA. america is pretty long for being a contraction

(Quit: We live in a society intent upon penalising those who produce, and rewarding those who don't.)

Welfare is when the Society invests into you...

unless your happy right now, ya aint gonna be happy with anything

money can't buy happiness, but it does buy toilet paper and we all like that

<Motivo> if americans could give up just 20% of their personal consumption, there would be much more resources for the rest of the world
<`2w3rp> if egypt would give up just 12% of its sand there would be much more sand for the rest of us!

i have a great new program to lose weight! its called "Stop eating you God damn pig!"

All radicals should be lined up against a wall and shot!!

you were dressing up in his cattle?

The difference between you and God is that God doesn't sit around thinking he's you

We should stone people in the street for having the audacity to stone people in the street.... but that could get ugly.

My cat Barny had sparkles comming from his cat fur when I was doing acid one timec

<zitterbe> If you could take 6-10 ppl on a long boat trip - who's U choose???
<nonappetising_gravy> zit id say take ppl who would look like theyd taste good if you run out of food

Be so pro life you'll kill people to prevent them from having abortions

Do you think SCIENCE fell out of the sky? It's a system created by MAN to explain things.

That is what gives my life meaning. Not believing in a spirtual belief that say there is and afterlife.

<Riathes> Many stones make a mountain.
<Gedit> many moles make a hill
<Riathes> errr something like that.

<Keith`> oh shit something is goign on out side brb
<Warner> by all means when a disturbance breaks out go charge right into it. some of the things we instictively do makes you wonder how we survived :)

porn is not a game. its serous business :) and dont get cute and quote me on that :)

I wonder what would happen if all the major organs were filled with tic tacs

I got an email that said someone has a crush on me...the site is called CrushLink...and they put in email addresses and this email goes out to them..for me to know WHO it came from I have to enter in email addresses...if I get it right it will congratulate me for getting the right email..then I would know who sent it...but the consequence is...every email address I enter in GETS a CrushLink email from ME!!!!

As you relax into the expression of love, the center of your self-understanding shifts from your individuality to your universality, from past to present, from ego to spirit. Or, maybe not.

(Quit: Creativity is to the mind what water is to the body)

<KristinHartnett> but i heard that people who sleep less live longer
<Munin> they don't really live longer, but they are just such a pain in the ass that it seems that way

<Alcar> Guest2134 - I mean that the fact that ppl think we are the final point of evoution, the most superiour species, the one to be reincarnated as above all others etc. is an ego trip.
<RFB> I think my cat has that problem. ;)

<Kantizuni> Argh! *deletes the kinky sex spam mail* I don't understand. You sign on to the Adobe mailing list and get spam. *screams in rage*
<Alcar> Kantizuni - come now. They have programs called dreamweaver and you didnt expect sex spam? :)

(Quit: For people who like peace and quiet: Get a phoneless cord.)

<Dlawso> anyone have a good definition for "spirit"
<Don_Casino> Jack Danials

(Quit: "All people aspire to greatness, the ones that make it are the ones who aren't afraid to sleep with the boss." - Phillip Carter)

is there any religion out there that lets me have sex with my half brother?

the mind is a tumor on the soul.

guys are just insecure, because females constently maniplate them

"Always do sober what you said you'd do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut. -- Ernest Hemmingway"

actually mountain dew is a good thing...it is a birth control

Ugly people at least can be pretty sure people love them for them and not how they look (unless of course they are rich :) then its the money)

blondes LOOK airy. Its a visual thing.

I think of it this way.... everybody is UGLY once you peel away the skin.

drugstores make sick walk to the back while healthy people can buy cigs at the front.

RULE #47 of "The Messiahs Handbook" - Never actually claim to be God until the last scene. and then only if you can be killed for it

laymen are hard pressed to know what a laymen is

everybody is a complete moron for five minutes every day. Wisdom is not exceeding your quota ;-)

Jurrassic park had a bad error in realism. Oh I dont mena the fact that they could clone dinosaurs...I mean how the T-Rex ate the lawyer and didn't die :)

whoever said money can't buy happiness only understood part of the picture. It might not buy happiness, but it can eliminate a great deal of UNhappiness ;-)

<BaDMonkeY> I can see it now "jesus - Summon - Tap this card to convert all your creatures to christians or catholics. Your opponent becomes the other. Your creatures then attack your opponent in a stupified blood fest claiming it for the holy land"

<Calabi> Gedit - try running and living and eating and saying "Hi" to real ppl and screw this cyber crap. [Uh... just a suggestion]
<Gedit> Calabi .. uh, i dont think so. are you nuts?
<Calabi> Nuts???
<Gedit> what kind of suggestion is that? :)

"Remember, no matter how cute you are, you still got an ***hole."

(Quit: Well they say that lifes a play, and that all the world's a stage, but for a better part Iplay, cause this show ends teh same way everyday)

I swear I get paid to do what I do only because I listen to the voices in my head

(Quit: Credo quia Absurdum - I believe, because it is absurd.)

The ancient Masters didn't try to educate the people, but kindly taught them to not-know. When they think that they know the answers, people are difficult to guide. When they know that they don't know, they can find their own way.

The difference between a career and a job is about 20 hours a week.

* Gedit wonders if qwerty has seen the little _ hanging off his jacket
* qwerty_ gets that little _ whenever he's surfing porn in another window
<Gedit> how come it's so small qwerty_ ?
<qwerty_> Gedit: it's one sixth the length of my nick... that's about 12" proportionately. If you think that's small, I pity your date

I found a list of the seven sins, and I think if I planned well I could break them all in one day

You heard about the agent who called the artist and told him all his paintings were sold. The agent said when he told this guy that paintings double in value after the death of the artist he just bought them all. The artist asked who the man was and the agent said "Your doctor."

it is because there is no trust...to believe in a philosopher in todays world would be to suspend your disbelief..and we only like to do that to today's great philosphers...our movie directors :P

(Quit: "The danger of ignorance is only in believing your not ignorant" Dr. Anderson)

(Quit: I can't explain, you would not understand. This is not how I am. I have become comfortably numb.)

<Fakeplastictree> insanity is all u need to make a good song
<gravy> conclusion: music makes you insane or those who are insane make music

* Kranke calls multitasking "sleeping while downloading"

Tan's Top Five quotes from GOD: 5. "Apocalypse Now.... now THERE was a good movie." 4. "You want me to WHAT?!??!?!?" 3. "Don't make me come down there!" 2. "I don't know." 1. "I was misquoted."

we are all winners! our daddy's sperm was the first and that made us! yea us!

... my argument about bestiality. It's ludicrous to whine about lack of sexual consent when you don't ask their consent to murder them for food.

I'm not a vegetarian because I love animals. I'm a vegetarian because I hate plants.

I am so glad I upgraded to wife 2.0 and gave mother 1.0 away to father 2.0.. I dont have mother problems any more

If God is watching us, the least we can do is be entertaining.

A diagnostic is someone who doesn't know whether there are two gods.

Religion is man's attempt to communicate with the weather.

Make God laugh - plan for the future.

A good sermon should have a good beginning and a good ending, and they should be as close together as possible.

"SATAN, SATAN! It's the main megafurnace! She's losin' power and the temperature is dropping fast! I'm not sure if I can hold her!" -- Scotty in Hell..

Blessed are the Fundamentalists, for they shall inhibit the earth.

Scientology is truly a peculiar religion in many respects. I've heard some stories that Hubbard created it on a bet.

I considered atheism but there weren't enough holidays.

Where will you spend eternity? Smoking or non-smoking?

And on the 8th day God said, "Ok Murphy, you take over."

I don't care WHO you are, you're not walking on the water while I'm fishing.

Instant shaman - add one drum and beat slowly.

Church Bulletin: Don't let worry kill you. Let the Church help.

When someone hurts me, I know that forgiveness is cheaper than a lawsuit, but not nearly as gratifying.

"If you freeze to death and end up in hell... wouldn't you be really comfortable some point along the way?"

Sudden prayers make God jump.

Beware of the Vampire Jesus - He gave his blood for you and he wants it all back now!

Christ died for our sins. Dare we make his martyrdom meaningless by not committing them? - Jules Feiffer

Adam to Eve: I'll wear the plants in this family!

"Living your life is a task so difficult, it has never been attempted before."

if I looked like Angelina Jolie.. would I be here? I don't think so

All the seven deadly sins are man's true nature. To be greedy. To be hateful. To have lust. Of course, you have to control them, but if you're made to feel guilty for being human, then you're going to be trapped in a never-ending sin-and-repent cycle that you can't escape from.

oddly enough I don't get hangovers.. just a cheap date

you can take every argument that a fundementalist uses for the validity of the bible and jesus, and apply it word for word to Spiderman, kind of interesting huh?

you know the milk has gone bad when: A: the cat won't drink it, B: santa is dead on your living room floor, C: its as thick as cream

<qwerty> YetiFemme: I just use the DAL mp3 channels... Linux doesn't have a lot of the clients you need to do the fancy stuff :-(
<YetiFemme> Hm... aw... poor qwerty. Guess you should've sold your soul to the MS Machine after all. ^_^ *experiences the glee of the damned*
<qwerty> YetiFemme: didn't your mama teach you nice girls don't gloat :-P

No, I'm referring to the fact that there are two types of free when it comes to software. The free as in free beer, and the free as in free speech.

"I believe in God, because I am God." ... [insert uncomfortable silence here]

I have a video of an exploding dog that might cheer you up. ;p

"Jesus was the very first heretic of the Christian Church"

(Quit: Some people say the glass is half empty, others say the glass is half full, I'd say its at 50% capacity.)

you want the best of everything: ethical flexibility, the comfort of a god, the comfort of absolute meaning, and the comfort of not sacrificing your reason; i dont call this a philsophy, i call this pandering to yourself

(Quit: The witch woman sees fortunes bold. Hidden thoughts- Visons old- Shame and truth before Devil's eyes. - Every woman is a witch, every witch is wise. *tarot card verse*)

(Quit: I'm God and even I don't believe in Me.)

(Quit: What's the ugliest part of your body? Some say your nose, some say your toes; I think it's your mind.)

HOANK IS THE TRUE GOD! GET IT THROUGH YOUR HEADS PEOPLE! THERE WILL BE HELL TO PAY WHEN YOU STAND BEFORE HOANK! ... have a nice day

I personally think pot could help me meditate but I've never tried to meditate.

<Jeramias> but you have to record every episode of python and find the full frontal nudity sketch :P
<Jeramias> Then find the sketch for me. It was either eppisode 8 or 12 :D
<Warner> but aint searchin for it since 1) its 1am here and B) the tapes are at a friends house
<Warner> asking him now
<Warner> he's reply is "your kidding"
<Warner> then something unprintable

(Quit: some say the glass is half empty, some say the glass is half full. I say go jump in the lake!)

<Nevaeh> we're supposed to believe the blonde had a purpose.. right?
<^00^> Nevaeh ----- She did. Ticket sales
<virgio> She jiggled nicely, I assume. Purpos fulfilled.
<qwerty> the only purpose I saw that she filled was about 20 minutes of quality time in my bathroom after the movie

I don't mean to bash Barbie, qwerty. I just mean that it is impossible for her to masturbate due to the tragic shortness of her arms.

I cant remember who said it. But someone was talking about the troubles in northern irland and said "It just goes to show that in a country with no blacks, jews, or mexicins people can still improvise"

"i'm sure there is as much truth to the zen of taking drugs as there is to the zen of flower arrangement, but that doesnt mean that all florists are Zen Masters"

(Quit: Every new business idea needs a genius behind it to bring it to life...Like the guy who created the internet....or the guy who invented crack!)

<Alcar> I mean, if you know everything you learn nothing knew. Kinda boring
<|Judy|> Yeah, but if you knew everything, you'd have some pretty cool get rich quick schemes.

since when does religious belief need popularity to be correct?

<Gryph> Everyone had to make a choice. Are you on Lucifer's side, or Christ's side?
<Alcar> Gryph - or right in the middle, selling tickets to the show?

My main motivation to get into heavin is the certain belive that telemarketers wont be allowed there :)

but please, i probably commit murder every day. people are executed. people murder people. animals die in slaughter houses. i step on ants.

My main motivation to get into heavin is the certain belive that telemarketers wont be allowed there :)

but please, i probably commit murder every day. people are executed. people murder people. animals die in slaughter houses. i step on ants.

The cheapest pick up line is....Excuse me, I'm lost. Can you point out the way to your room?

'mary did her best work on her knees, I bet your the same way'

* qwerty begins to understand why so many pregnancies result from truth or dare :-/

I never raised my hand when dad's sperm penetrated mom's egg and said "Hey - send me"

Satan is my co Driver

I'd like to take a Glock and 500 bucks and hold a gun to their head and say - "Either take a hundred or I blow you head off" Do it 5 times in NY. That's screw em up

cows are scary ;) they stare at you! and follow you around and after the secret cow level one diablo II, it is quite intimidating

"Freedom is an hallucination induced by a pathological lack of paranoia."

i am pro-post-birth-abortion-of-the-terminally-stupid

spiritual alchemy is the transmutation of the self into gold.

<lemuria> Killing animals just to kill them is wrong. Killing them for food is not


<aslhk> lemuria: I believe the same thing about humans

our money says "in god we trust" because there is not enough money in the world to back it...

<aslhk> well, I believe in gods but I don't know if they're greater than me. that would be asking a lot.

<Alcar> lemuria - Thats because we're superior to other animals. Only a superior species can murder. Its one of them things that seperates us from animals. Aren't you proud? :)
<lemuria> What makes us superioir? The ability to murder. That is a shitty definition of man
<Alcar> lemuria - then its true :)

Do you want to die at the hand of a 12 year old with a 357 taking your daughter to kindegarten?

I didn't kill as a child because I was brought up not to waste things

Did you ever kill anything as a child? previous to your training is waste managment?

I don't see much difference between killing a bug and killing a larger thing. I mean, aside from the fact that larger things struggle more.

* Alcar considers the irc courtship ...
<Alcar> "Oh, your font! Its so .. so ... dark! And bold!"
<Nevaeh> look at the length of that nick
<Alcar> "Hey, baby, I can type 80 words per minute! Imagine me and you in bed!" | much later: "Ack! Carpal tunnel syndrome acting up!" *begins pinching breat* "Cant .. stop . .right click!"

* Nevaeh has thought she met quite a few people that she never really met at all.

to paraphrase the simpsons: "beer and prostitutes: the cause and solution to all of life's problems"

Christmas Carols #5 : narcissistic - "Hark the Herald Angels Sing About Me"

Christmas Carols #7 : paranoid - "Santa Claus is Coming to Get Me"

i dont like my genitals.....to much matenence

if you had an investment of a dollar at 3% compounded annually for 500 years, you'd own the universe

Nothing can kill a poodle! Except, maybe, spontaneous combustion.

everyone has a song...few hear each others song because they are so busy singing their own sometime...

If God had wanted us to be ashamed of our nudity, he would have given us bigger hands.

In the name of the Old Man, The Kid, and the Spook, Amen.

Want to talk to God? Send Him some kneel-mail.

(Quit: If I'm anything by a clinical name, I'm a kind of paranoiac in reverse. I suspect people of plotting to make me happy.)

* AlcarGM always thought sex was a drug ..
<michaellll> AlcarGM: it is...but whether it is a prescription or over the counter...that we dont know :)
<AlcarGM> the first on the counter drug :)

they need to do a broadway musical based on the Texas Chainsaw Massacre

<Dark_Core> I wonder if Ayn Rand would have given her baby breastmilk.
<infinite_monkey> Dark_Core - If she could charge the baby for it later.

Take every single movie that was ever on MST3K, multiply them by 12, put them in a trash compactor, then a juicer and squeeze the whole thing into a cube, and that essence of bad movie would be slightly, marginally better than Simply Irresistible.

I'm an elitest prick, perhaps, but I'm not a snob.

the ``wandered the desert'' thing isn't all that unlikely, when you think about it... settlers roamed the deserts of the American southwest for about that long before ending up in the Holy Land (California)

with a large segment of Christiandom, it's not so much that they have different definitions, but rather that there are numerous absolutely correct and incontrovertible definitions ;-)

<Yite> No, the Devil is MUCH cooler than aol.
<|337C4bB4g3> indeed. he prolly has much faster internet access. he must, to run all those porn sites

(Quit: it is in the nature of man to believe the obvious, the truth however needs to be mined like gold)

* Tandaco is Aussie btw
<SpiriTech> tandaco: which part mate?
<Tandaco> all of me

irc... where the men are men, the women are men, and the kids are FBI agents

the more i'm out of highschool the more I see that the world is just one big highschool

a great quote..."the greatest risk it not taking one"

on teh next geraldo: Melatonin and the pineal gland.

The only nice people left are the ones with bodies in the crawlspaces. They say, "He was such a nice guy." That's no coincidence!

think of all the violence you can prevent with a few well thought out cattle-proddings! people can't be violent while convulsing on the floor

(Quit: Nothing shocks me. I'm a scientist. - Indiana Jones)

I don't Cyber I find that kind of hand / hand coordination taxing

if only everyone in florida didnt vote...there would have been a much clearer winner

(Quit: "You don't understand. You're not into sex like me. I climbed her because she was there. Like Everest." -- Joshuan Then And Now)

If only homosexuals used aol, then there'd be no more children!

Quit (How can they see the love in our eyes and still they don't believe us?)

there shall be no metaphorization of similes, nor assimilation of metaphors

Ya can't fake tripping on acid :)

i find that atheism is a very strict faith

"Intelligent Design" = "God created the entire Universe with it's millions of galaxies, quadrillions of stars, billions of worlds, etc, strung out over tens of billions of lightyears in time and space, all for the sole benefit of a small tribe of nomadic Semites in an obscure corner of a small planet revolving around an unremarkable sun"

<joey40> what confuses alot of people is that there is no commas or capitalization or periods in ancient hebrew
<Alcar> ooh, they wrote it while on irc? that explains soo much

OK, so, let's get rid of the "evil" idea... now, how are we going to motivate people to obey our commands, without the threat of ostracization?

(Quit: When i was being brought to the electric chair i thought to myself what a waste so many people i hadnt killed yet)

* freelance is normal - turns out everyones idea of normal is wrong

* Alcar thinks genuine love was invented by the first romance writer to get a cheap buck and to speed up a plot

love taste just like chicken

Quit (Gotta kick at the darkness til it bleeds daylight...)

"Love"... no, I think it's easier to call it a combination of (a) lust, (b) friendship, and (c) a strong sense of community support for such a union. "We'd make such a good couple; our friends would be impressed"

women invest far more in maintaining the illusion of a good marriage... men tend to invest in the illusion of having a good job :)

Portia, you're obviously lazy and morally deficient if you find that maintaining illusions is too much work ;->

The only reason I even go [to school] is so I wont have to anymore eventually :)

in order to believe you must have faith, and if you have faith then you must have first have doubted.. because if you knew for certain then that would defeat the purpose of having faith.

I can just imagine it! Groups A is the test group. These people will go arund killing strangers for a month. Group B is the control group. These people will not kill anyone for the next 30 days. Then at the end the data will be tabulated and we will find out conclusivily if murder is wrong

<Munin> Tonitrus: well, by definition, anything that can be emperically demonstrated is not god
<Tonitrus> Are you saying that if a huge shining entity descended from the clouds, and it was empirically proven, it would simply be a force of nature?

its perfectable acceptable to posit that judeo-christian mythology is completely incorrect and that you will find that by not spending your life devoted to the Vedic dieties you will be forced to come back as an insect

Sure is a lot of confusion in the Bible for it to be written by a non-confusing author

I'm not sure how one can be an 'athiest pagan'

I'm not often frustrated by elitism, because I am more elite than anyone else! :)

so, I just do what I do, and when asked for advice, I give my honest opinion and wait for the questioneer to burst into flames at my non-pc response

reading uncle Bucky's big blue book and watching 'charmed' every week will not make you enlightened

(Quit: The Ten Commandments have done pretty well for themselves for centuries; they don't need help from members of Congress. Perhaps if politicians started following the Commandments, and stopped using them for crass political purposes, we'd be better off.)

i think all wiccans are freaks and should never dance around the maypole unless they are fully clothed with bells on their heads.

(Quit: Some people say the glass is half empty. Some say half full. I say I'm thirsty.)

<|PhucKo|> God is straight. he like pussy
<Randall> |PhucKo| - if god is straight, why did god make adam first?
<|PhucKo|> because man is better
<Randall> if man is better,why does god denigrate himself by being straight and wanting inferior goods?
<|PhucKo|> o m g. how dare u say that

You win. You win because I'm too lazy to explain why you're wrong.

immoral people are almost always better off! Moral people have to pay for things :(

Money is like Santa Claus, if he were real but stuffed with blinking lights and false padding

My sister just walked past this room in her bathing suit with a butcher knife in her hand

<socrates^> Nevaeh, debate over what?
<Nevaeh> socrates^ this and that
<Nevaeh> mainly that
<Nevaeh> this gets jealous of that because that has an A
<|337C4bB4g3> what about the other?
<Nevaeh> |337C4bB4g3 ugh just make me lose some more sleep..

<aslhk> I like didn't know what masturbation was until a health class told me
<^Kit^> you're kidding me.
<aslhk> nope
<^Kit^> aslhk, do you not have arms?
<aslhk> glad I was in class
<^Kit^> (that's a serious question.)
<^Kit^> you might have exploded or sommat

<Saroc> And I don't mean spitting or swallowing...I mean you can give a guy an oral without actually putting it *in* your mouth
<^Kit^> I guess with women it's more like kissing. with men it's more like.. I dont' know... singing into a microphone *laughs*

<^Kit^> qwerty, how long have you been married?
<qwerty> ^Kit^ I'm not sure... more than five years. Probably 6.5 or seven
<^Kit^> you're not sure?
<^Kit^> how can you not be sure??
<qwerty> ^Kit^ I don't keep track of things like dates, names, faces, people... just the important stuff like novels, comic books, movies and computers

<Nevaeh> what is the most dumb thing you've ever asked?
<qwerty> Nevaeh ``is that the right hole?''

<|MadMax|> may I marry you and gain control of half your dadies kingdom
<|337C4bB4g3> mad: do you always start conversations this way?

<Nevaeh> Max_K I tried to meditate the way you told me.. err last night, and the night before last
<Max_K> Nevaeh !
<Nevaeh> I slept

Meditate for 0.0009 seconds per day. It did me wonders.

my fingers are not independent of my arms

(Quit: Your computer is about to crash..(as long as your using windows and doing anything important))

<michaelll> pop music isnt what I listen to...but it does have its place...
<Tonitrus> michaelll, The trash can?

<GeneralChekov> public nudity my ass
<Sally```> wouldnt that be the point of it ?

I don't like teachers much actually. They treated me like a child when I was... um a child. :) I always found that insulting.

so instead of saying "don't become a teacher".. how about you say "thank you for being a teacher"?

Women are people. But Corporations were people before they were. Thats sad.

(Quit: ...for in the final analysis Jews have the religion of children, Christians one of the impossible and Muslims that of hogs - al-Kindi)

one can be evil and quickly there will be people to condemn it as satanic and devilish.. but if the same person does good.. the church will be after the one for donations :))

<Dalener> i'll be your lover
<Dalener> i'll be forever
<Dalener> i'll be tomorrow
<Dalener> i am anything when im high
<Alcar[afk]> wow. that just solved lots of theological issues .. Satan was high when he decided to take over Heaven :)
<Dalener> "god...i don't wanna be blasphemical or ........dude........but you are melting...god"

if you enjoyed your teen age years the their is something wrong with you.

<Kristin_Hartnett> what about your Creator?
<Munin> Kristin_Hartnett: what do you mean? my parents?
<Kristin_Hartnett> No I mean the God who made you
<Munin> Kristin_Hartnett: you are really going to lay a judeo-christian concept on a Pagan and expect him to buy it?

(Quit: ....Every morning is the dawn of a new error...)

knowledge is things you know, experiences built up over time. It is not truth. Truth has more in comom w/ wisdom than knowledge and understand has more to do with imaginnation than learning.

You throw a rope to someone your drowning and you shape it like a noose. WW2 was caused because of the resitruction and humiliations put on the losers of ww1

* `2w3rp is a pinko commie fag who wants to eat your children and turn your churches into shopping malls

(Quit: Proud yet elated member of the Department of Redundancy Department.)

(Quit: What my cardboard sign would say: "Will RP For Food.")

I would certainly say that a bible that has been translated twice by parties with serious political agendas is likely to contain at least some degree of deviance from the original, divine or not.

jesus said seek the kingdom of god within you, and, do unto others as you would have them to unto you (those were his two commandments to us) .. those two are MORE tahn enough to live an entire life by .. and it would be a life of challenge to behabve towards everyone in that manner

A fool's mind is at the mercy of his tongue and a wise man's tongue is under the control of his mind.

(Quit: Take my Revolution, no really, you can have it, I never use it anymore, really....)

<Wolfie``> a fool and his proverb are soon quoted

Actually, I imagine seeing him upset would be a lot better than not seeing him, as you could at least get a running start

<Swift_Munda23> what religion do you follow Avatara?

<Avatara> I don't follow any external religion -- I develop and use my own.
<Avatara> And you? * Swift_Munda23 is Sikh * Kantizuni is backish
<Kantizuni> oops... that was a bad time to say that. o.o

S&M&M... melts in your mouth, -and- in your hand. *smirks*

<Phenius> k, my hd was constantly fluxuating yesterday, saying that i was outta hd space when it showed i had 1gig left...
<Sintaqx> easy problem to solve
<Sintaqx> erase windows, load linux

this is pretty pathetic.... discussing how to torture a puppet to death.....

(Quit: Traveler, there is no path... Walking makes the path.)

a true theist'll put up with all types of shit, hence the masochistic themes in religion

<MaxHardcore> consciousness was invented about 3000 years ago according to the evidence presented
<Gedit> MaxHardcore it seems unlikely that what is considered one of the greatest pieces of western writing was in fact written by unconscious beings

It's been so long since catholic school, I had forgotten that we are all vile evil people and destined to burn in hell

Ironic that one would place more merit in the tools of a political regime than in the more untainted gospels that have escaped the ravages of the church.

(Quit: We turn to God for help when our foundations are shaking, only to learn that it is God who is shaking them. - "One ought, every day at least, to hear a little song, read a good poem, see a fine picture and, if possible, speak a few reasonable words.")

jesus...jesus...oh, wasnt he the mass murderer guy about 2000 years ago?

Another quote: "Flippantly congealed titanium constructs magnificant oblong obelisks of ebony construed as rainbows diligently attending art school."

here is a cool quote...""Never look down on anybody unless you're helping them up." :)

well, earth is the name of an ancient mother goddess. i always found it interesting that god named his primary creation after another god. in doing that, he would be committing idolatry.

1-866-BODYBAG for all your corpse removal needs.

<mysterywhiteboy> you're damming up your libido but it's a vicious monster pounding on the bars of its cell!
<mangore`> whoa, mysterywhiteboy ! * mysterywhiteboy admits to reading too much freud lately

Religion is what happens when you evolve some trippy organic parallel computers, and throw them into a world where nothing is true, and everything is permissible.

Indeed, how can men talk of truth and beauty, having never beheld an Elite Space Monkey in full splendor?

if Jesus never had sex than I might accept that he wasnt human :)

<Kristin_Hartnett> i honestly do want to do something valuable with my life. i just don't know what. I need a man.
<aslhk> Kristin_Hartnett: it's easier to do valuable things when you have money

So then me, being weak and non-violent, non-confrontational, and weak willed, as well as a hopeless romantic (of sorts) will never find a girl because they want a strong man who will beat them after y'all are married?

(Quit: IRC: helping socially retarded pseudo-intellectuals get laid since 1995.)

I've dreamt in my life dreams that have stayd with me ever after, and changed my ideas; they've gone through and through me, like wine through water, and altered the color of my mind - Emily Bronte

the bible is the world as God wants you to see it. maybe he isn't the top god and just is fantisizing that he is and thats what the book is

Pigs fly once they become footballs

(Quit: To err is human, but it feels divine. -- Mae West)

<Pastor_Turba> I fell into a vat of warmed holy water, and was accidentally "pastorized".

they say haiti is 99% catholic and 100% voodoo

the language is between the subject and the reality , which is also inherent to the subject. when you write about it , you don't perceive that. you only have a cristalized knowlodge and that's why we don't have holy books. the way we perceive reality is always changing , a holy book can't change together. the message must be interpretated in diferent contexts

(Quit: Whether commies, freaks, or XY chromosome mutants, we are there, sons of the free.)

I have a big vocabulary because I went to school instead of getting married

Too many people get offended when you don't trust them. Which, of course, is further proof of how many stupid people are out there.

I'm not saying that vocabulary is the path to enlightenment. just a side fact

<Kristin_Hartnett> so what kind of work does a philosophy major go into
<Munin> Kristin_Hartnett: teaching
<Kristin_Hartnett> thats it?
<Alcar> Kristin_Hartnett - something that involves very little heavy lifting. Its the same reason ppl becmoe clergy :)

<mysterywhiteboy> philosophers can write and analyze so they are becoming more valued by employers
<Munin> mysterywhiteboy: keep telling yourself that. you might even start to believe it while you are standing in the unemployment line but at least you'll be able to be philosophical about it and its always good for picking up chicks

"Practice makes perfect, but nobodys perfect so why practice."

God made man, and then he said 'I can do better than that' and made women

<Alcar[htmling]> Kit - oh yes! Most ppl go, as a grandmother of a friend put it once, to get an MS or a MRS.
<Kristin_Hartnett> Alcar[htmling], thats why poeple go to Christian caollege
<^Kit^> Kristin_Hartnett, they go to Christian Caollege to learn how to spell "college" :P

<Kristin_Hartnett> Kit, there's a lot of good Christian schools but they aren't accredited for some reason.... I forget why
<^Kit^> Kristin_Hartnett, no comment.

<mysterywhiteboy> you know the joke you said about us dating Kristin_Hartnett?
<Kristin_Hartnett> yeah
<mysterywhiteboy> we shouldn't even be in the same city :D

"Post to soc.culture.women asking "what's your favorite brand of oven mitt, little ladies?""

<Kristin_Hartnett> the ibble makes poeple uncomfortab;e, i thiink. wow typos
<Alcar[htmling]> Kristin_Hartnett - now just imagine the typos in one sentence of the bible j/k

<Jadedpoetgrrl> Phloyd: hah! What do you know about hard lives! Nothing! I've had at least six lives which were much harder than any you can even imagine!

Team work is for those who can't take care of themselves.

* Kantioohnee was raised from 13 as a Discordian, and is a priest of 3 different religions now... *blink*

I was raised an idiot

(Quit: the streets are paved with people and you're just another one)

Lets have a touchy emotional argument over whether its right to crack an egg on its side or its end.

<^Kit^> mysterywhiteboy, you're making that statement by presupposing the nonexistance of a 'spiritual world.' you're assuming they've made it up.
<mysterywhiteboy> uhm, yeah, because I don't really beleive in spirit
<^Kit^> mysterywhiteboy, presupposing facts to prove a point is neither logical nor scientific.
<mysterywhiteboy> which is where philosophy comes in!

We don't live in a world of numbers, or trees, or atoms. We live in a world of perceptions.

the fact of the matter is, no one calls the scientific method into question. it *IS* the new ten commandments.

To choose science over religion, or religion over science seems like idiocy to me.

i dont think that kierkegaard understood kierkegaard

I think things fit together well under the assumption that we are all dolphins dreaming.

I really dont' have a problem with people that live a thick religious life. except that I happen to think that they are wrong

Love is a neccesity not a food

never underestimate the power of being a stubborn bastard :P

the only truble with global domination is the domination part. that or the hours

"Are you as pretty as you look?"

<Keith`> so watch where just pond skum on the buttom of some guys pool
<Baliadoc> ah, but that's a anthropocentric view of the universe ;)
<Alcar> we're really the xheherhr of some dhdhey skegam.
<Baliadoc> ah, but that's a XIneakKflicentric view of the universe ;)
<Alcar> ah, drat!
* Keith` is lost
<Baliadoc> i don't think its' so much that we're lost as much as we refuse to remain found :)
<Alcar> so the universe is a lost lost and found box
<Baliadoc> there we go :)

* Gedit suggests a topic: If you could only invite one _______ to be with you to tour the universe, would it be god?
<ketam> would be my girlfriend
<Gedit> this is the universe, ketam, not the mall

I think I would laugh if, in Heaven, God asked everyone what they thought the meaning of life is... to give him some ideas on what to tell people when he is asked.

Quit: Mind Like A Steel Trap - Rusty And Illegal In 37 States

(Quit: I used to think #game1 was driving me insane. Then I realized it already had.)

you should really stop thinking. it doesn't suit you.

Saying you easily amused yourself is not stroking one's ego. It's simply saying you have a low standard of humour

If emptiness is loneliness and loneliness is cleanliness and--err.. what was the question?

you know, the problem with right is that 20% of the time they're used, and 80% of the time they're abused

to err is human, to forgive is canine.

<o____o> I like stories Maybe an interactive story?
* qwerty_the_uberTroll knows ``Goldilocks and the three Hell's Angels'' :-)

calling you a pervert would be like calling the sky blue.

I have a theory, that microsoft windows code is generated by 10,000 monkeys with 10,000 typewriters. As a correlary, I would postulate that many of the movies that come out are a byproduct of microsofts OS development.

<syntheist> |337C4bB4g3: I got a better ideas, the script writers in holy wood take a dump on a news paper and use the letters that arn't covered by faeces and play some giant game of word/phrase scrabble
<Alcar[dishes]> the result being a movie title like Revenge of the Clones syntheist? :)

God said (Isaiah 45:7) "I make peace and create evil," a contradiction in one holy breath!! (And we all thought, of our own evil, it was 'the devil made me do it.')

"Astronomers at Carnegie University claim their electron telescopes are so powerful, not only are they able to see the big bang, but they have also spotted God's finger setting it off. The astronomers are now leading the race to find burnt remnants of God's finger somewhere in the universe. "

"The similarity of alien spacecraft to kitchenware and the fact they often hover above fields of crops and beef points some towards the conclusion the our extra-terrestrial visitors are in fact chefs from another galaxy. "

how precisely would you know what intelligence is ? you have no personal examples to start from.

it's easier to condemn other people than to live with yourself.

* EliteCabbage douses himself liberally in pesticide (the anti-human variety)

[Objectivism:]
<michaelll> it is interesting to read about...but then...you may ned to take a shower later

<Sparkie> if life isnt a contrdiction, what is?
<Notaxkat> it's not. life is a biological state. we are alive. what is contradictory about it ?
<Sparkie> you mean you dont know?! well, you'l.l figure it out when you're older I gueess
<Notaxkat> I would expect that kind of argument from a parent to his six-year old... either you disrespect me completely, or you're just an idiot
<Sparkie> both

<Notaxkat> I can't imagine how anyone could be more resented than me. I get kicked by people I don'T even know
<aslhk> Notaxkat: I'm on aol
<Notaxkat> oh
<aslhk> that alone makes more than 100 people a month disrespect me

If you pray hard enough, you can make water run uphill. How hard? Why, hard enough to make water run uphill, of course!

(Quit: "There is a pleasure sure, In being mad, which none but the madmen know." - John Dryden)

4 am thought: There should be a higher power in the universe or at least some smart aliens since the idea of humans being the most imporant and smartest species in the universe is just plain depressing.

today marks a new era in american life and unfortunately bush is at the helm

Bush's foreign policy would be better if it were non-existant :P

* Sintaqx is christian, unless you listen to some other christians, in which case I'm not

bah, you should always criticise someone who gives you so much to critisize.

Just become atheists and be happy. Holy wars are stupid.

can someone just give me a straight answer, even if you are lying

sometimes I think people come in standoffish and inquisitive because they -WANT- to be wrong. or at least, reassured of the answer.

I think my religion follows me more than I follow it.

<^Kit^> Avatara, I don't have a religion. I have a spiritual philosophy :P
<|337C4bB4g3> ^Kit^: Funny, I've just got some neurochemical thingies going on in my head =)
<^Kit^> |337C4bB4g3, to each hir own

(Quit: Prick your finger it is done the moon has now eclipsed the sun the angel has spread its wings the time has come for bitter things)

if you can keep your mouth shut long enough to ram three aircraft into 10,000 people, I imagine you can keep your mouth shut pretty good

<|337C4bB4g3> i got called the spawn of antichrist and banned from a fundie channel for saying we should all love each other :
<
<GeminiRai> they probably took it in a sexual way
<|337C4bB4g3> no. they said it disagreed with the teachings of the bible

(Quit: "A door is a mystery, it is. Though most would think 'tis a mystery to find what lies on the other side, the fundamental question is always wether 'tis there to keep something out--or to hold something in." -Elminister)

* Keith` idley makes the comment of back on hovers day we didn't have major acts of terrorisom in this contry....
<Keith`> i bleave it had something to do with his waring a dress

* MajkStone wants to bomb the shitz outta afganastan
<Keith`> like some one commented a long time ago "lets bomb them back to the stone age" "whats that going to do, set them back a two weeks?"

i'm convinced that aol stands for an other loser

<Dlawso> Nevaeh, you mean I have to prove myself to god, not the other way around?
<Nevaeh> Dlawso I know.. its scary isn't it..

<o____o> Its even harder to lay blame if you don't believe ther is a God ;)
<Alcar> o____o - Well, yeah. Blaming random fluctuations in the space-time continuum for your probelms takes REAL dedication :)

you insult my religion. I will hunt you down and kill you... God bless.

pentecostalism basically appeals to christians who need their minds extremely ordered and a powerful emotional codependent relationship with god; it is the anti-episcopalianism

bagpipes always make me weepy, but bagpipes and amazing grace can be considered weeping under duress

(Quit: Such ignorance in the world. Lets ignore it!)

my wife got an excerpt from a backfired radio call-in show prank in her mail the other day... this guy had the DJ call his wife posing as his boss to say he'd been fired for screwing his secretary... the woman went completely off (understandably) and told the DJ ``now I don't feel so guilty for fscking his brother'' :-)

Begin with loss and see how the world contradicts you, how the horizon implies that beyond it the water is not empty but full of ships all docking at another island - Lynn Emanuel

<o____o> If you tie an elephant to a phone post with dental floss, the elephant will think it can't leave.
* Alcar suspects the elephant is tied by the teeth and ia really just afraid of the dentist

<o____o> Well my concept of self is that I'm a couch so my ego must be drunk

Lol, Watson! "Give me three identical people and i will turn one into a saint, one into a rogue, and one into a killer" or something like that.

<Avatara> well -- technically, God visiting the planet for a romantic rendezvous would make him an extra-terrestrial in the true meaning of the term.
<lokispawn> and, if there was no consent, that would make him a rapist
<Avatara> right -- like some woman would give up the opportunity to have an orgasm from God.
<lokispawn> avatara..and, if she yelled out "oh, god!", would that mean she wasn't faking it?

Having ANY university degree helps you. I don't see any particular benifit of having a psych/history/philosophy/etc one. Having a degree does show you are smart and able to handle a workload.

I've never understood how one can have a BA in biology. lol

"Medical researchers have discovered a new disease that has no symptoms. It is impossible to detect, and there is no known cure. Fortunately, no cases have been reported thus far."

"Here's a way most people over fifty can alleviate boredom and kill a half hour at the same time. Take your keys and put them in your right hand. Then with your left hand call up a friend to confirm a lunch appointment. Then look for your car keys."

Ya know man - I would lay Emily Dickenson if she talked to me right. I love her!!! [dead or not]

<|337C4bB4g3> I was just stating facts =)
<^Kit^> |337C4bB4g3, if i had a nickel for everytime I heard that..
<|337C4bB4g3> ^Kit^: I think debating requires both parties to accept the possibility that they may be wrong, and I don't think either party in this instance does that on any regular basis =)

<EliteCabbage> Hey, does it count as an insult if I fail to object to an association that someone makes regarding a discretely undirected comment I have recently made?
<Tonitrus> EliteCabbage, since I didn't follow what you said, the answer is "no"

<o____o> COULD Laden get a fair trial by US authorities? Seems doubtful
<Alcar> o____o - He could hire the Dream Time. Worked for OJ.
<o____o> If the missile don't fit you must aquit

old school games were GAMES, not eye candy with a controller

(Quit: Remember, hentai may be funny, but what does the tenticle think?)

<SoFreshAndSoClean> we're discussing the apocolypse
<Prometheous> we're not discussing the apocolypse at all.

Quit: Nonsense," said Pippi. "If the heart is warm and beats the way it should, there is no reason to be cold.")

you don't think you could keep yourself from spending money that you don't have? =P

Quit: Men and nations behave wisely once they have exhausted all the other alternatives. - Abba Eban (1915-))

It is against the rules of this channel to have a penis?

Religion is a comfort tool taken in moderation. Taken to extremes it is a weapon that defies reason. IMHO.

<Nevaeh> I always liked Halloween. I have no idea what I'm going to dress as this year.
<Alan_Parsons> I'm dressing up as an asshole this year.. I dont even have to buy special clothes

* mysteryWhiteBoy wonders if kentucky is like the bermuda triangle, stuck back in 1993 tho

you know bali, I've never SEEN crack, and I'm one of the most corrupted youth there are these days

sex is so much more fun when you can remember it

<Ziplock93> oh and I'm now my own pet peeve, cuz I made out with somone a whole lot older then me, but I love to harrass a friend of mine for having a pedophile for a boyfriend
<Warner> Ziplock93 do you have any idea how talking about such things on the net freaks people out?
<Ziplock93> shuch things as?
<Warner> dating pedophiles. I feel like I could end up on 20/20 just by watching you type :P

I get my morality from empathy and self interest (i'm against theft because I don't want myself or those I care for to be stolen from). I think most of us have similar sources of morality.

when my friend has to poop she says "I'm going to go drop a few friends off at the pool"

'"When I take action, I'm not going to fire a $2 million missile at a $10 empty tent and hit a camel in the butt. It's going to be decisive." - G. W. Bush

(Quit: [MajkScript 4.0] A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well.)

<SpiriTech> do you know that if you hit a cow in india.. and if the cow died you got to prison for 2 months?
<o____o> Cows are weak. If you'd hit a moose the moose would have won ;)

One time I ran over a ninja in my tercel.

<WilliamPall> I don't like the idea of having my god become evil.
<ArthurQ> ok then dont use it. do whatever u want
<WilliamPall> don't get me wrong, it's a good idea.
<ArthurQ> i know it is

nothing is realy bad so smoke must be good for your health

The first 10 years of my life were Anger Managment.

(Quit: If sacrifice was fate's design, I'd give up my possessions for quiet moments spent with you...beneath the cloak of Heaven's wings.)

Ever notice the trend? Bones, Crusher, Bashir. Violent doctor names.

(Quit: When i wake up. i know im gonna be im gonna be the man hugover next to you, and when i throw up i know im gonna be im gonna be the man that throws up next to you, and when i get sober again i know im gonna be im gonna be the man the.....well im not gonna be sober)

Quit (There is a deeper world than this....)

The world is not polytheistic. The one god jsut has lots of masks and stunt doubles

Wonder why nobody's in #religious_debate... Did someone finally win????

they gave me a etch-a-sketch at work...took me a month to realize it wasn't a laptop

I thought about running for class president or something like that on the platform that "I'm smarter than your ass" because everybody thinks I'm a supergenious just cause I'm not a total moron

"Were it left to me to decide whether we should have a government without newspapers, or newspapers without a government, I should not hesitate a moment to prefer the latter." Thomas Jefferson, "Letter to Col. Edward Carrington", January 16, 1787

The purpose of religion is extra holidays :)

atheism is hard because it means going without the comforts of religion and having to face lots of people who think you are controlled by the devil. heh

<perion> Howw about... does God exist in salt?
<o____o> No, but Lot's wife does

<BZ_> my theory is that religion is for lazy people
<o____o> that should get us talking

Mary had an affair and lied to Joseph. "No it wasn't that roman slave boy, it was .. um GOD". And JOseph bought it and the rest you know.

and I'm not heartless, or I wouldn't be haveing problems with my heart.

Christians couldnt beat the Pagans....so they joined them :)

(Quit:If self-preservation is the highest goal of life, then is there anything worth dying for?)

IN TIME OF WAR, THE LAW FALLS SILENT. learn that. its a fact of life.

I used to sit under the bridge and shoot guys like you coming across

There has been no war in history in which it makes sense that you must have peace to talk peace. It is a completely bogus slogan to make sure that there is no peace.

stop building your strawmen out of snow!

all you see is an image thererefore any sufficiently advanced image is indistinguishable form the real thing

in point of fact, I'd argue that it's MUCH harder to imagine a world in which normal moral principles do not apply, than a world in which normal physical or logical principles do not apply. For example, try to imagine a world in which wizards can cast rain spells.

anyone who eats ramen or whatever that mr noodles stuff is has to be masochistic on some level

"gin, the other white meat"

Headless Grenade Pin ... now THAT'S a punk rock band name ...

(Quit: How much longer do I need to wait, how much more do I need to search, to find the light I know there is inside me? I have lieved alone among a lot of people, I have never get to love, because I don't even love me.)

<Nevaeh> are you angst ridden?
<twoofsix> whats ridden?
<Nevaeh> full of.. angst.. angry, bitter you know.. (average ameture poet)

"It's always funny until someone gets hurt, and then it's just hilarious"

Religion avoids grey. Thats why priests were black with white collars.

(Quit: When you wish upon a star, makes no difference who you are, when you wish upon a star, in all likelyhood your wish won't come true and you'll just get disappointed.)

Militant Agnostic: I don't know and you don't either

The soul is like an appendix. The mind is like a tumour. The brain is like a curse.

<Tonitrus> "Milhouse... there's no such thing as a soul... it's just something parents made up to scare children... like the boogie man, and Michael Jackson" - Bart Simpson

if you had an investment of a dollar at 3% compounded annually for 500 years, you'd own the universe

(Quit: I know the pieces fit cuz I watched them fall away Mildewed and smoldering. Fundamental differing. Pure intention juxtaposed will set two lovers souls in motion Disintegrating as it goes testing our communication)

(Quit: United we divide.)

Once I get my webcam, I'll be putting every item in my house on ebay. lol

hmm, is it wrong when you ask someone how big a shirt saying "future nudie bar dancer" is on ebay so you can get it for your grandmother?

(Quit: Fill the molds.. when at first we anticipated a breaking.. the breaking.. -is- the mold.)

besides, everyone knows that the sun doesn't really exist. it's just an urban myth. like trees

chuthulu saves sinners... he might get hungry later!

(Quit: I like my whiskey on ice and my woman on fire!)

<Mido`> who is you?
<aslhk> Just think of all of the best qualities a person could have. Add them all into a fictional person. Then multiply that person by ten. That is me.

(Quit: Damn: what to do when you're both afraid of enlightment and fooling yourself)

friends don't let friends op drunk!

<|337C4bB4g3> joekerr: Can you back that claim up?
<joekerr> i wish you had a nick i could type so i could address you
<|337C4bB4g3> joekerr: It's not my fault if you are not elite. =)
<joekerr> you do not exist, because i cannot type your nick

John Wayne once said "Life is tough, but it's tougher when you're stupid"

Whoever said that madness is not amusing? 90 million schizophrenics can't all be wrong!

Sanity is a crutch for those who can't handle reality.

<Kristin_Hartnett> I used to listen to them before I got saved and I haven't heard anything about them since.
<Alcar> saved from music? By what? The RL version of Net Nanny?
<mysteryMachine> you can't listen to korn now that you're saved?
<Kristin_Hartnett> I just didn't like them anymore.

If I am going to listen to something with some guy making guttural noises, I expect their musicians to at least be talented =)

<mysteryMachine> hrm i've been demoted on #literature
<qwerty> mysteryMachine you're a short story, now?
<mysteryMachine> wha?
<qwerty> mysteryMachine maybe an epic poem?

some Mac user's group called me up at the school the other day and asked for us to start a Mac newbies class... I don't think they liked my answer :-/

<Tanilo_> Or this one: 'How to be compassionate in every day life'
<Kantizuni> Who would want to be compassionate?

Someday, someone will open their sock drawer and discover Atlantis. Truly, the Goddess works in mysterious ways.

<Tanilo_> Meanwhile, on the bottom of the sea, Atlantis slowly slides. Some day it will rise again, perhaps in the Yellow sea outside China
<Kantizuni> Why won't it stay down there, where Goddess put it?
<Alcar> Kantizuni - if She put it there, it would have to rise eventually, out of sheer perversity :)
<Alcar> or she could put it wherever lost socks go .... but fitting an entire island into a washer and dryer and getting it lost might be hard even for Her. Unless she had lots of socks and quarters
<Kantizuni> Tanilo_: I have a question before you go...
<Alcar> Someday, someone will open their sock drawer and discover Atlantis. Truly, the Goddess works in mysterious ways.
<Kantizuni> Tanilo_: Where is the proof?
<Alcar> Kantizuni - In my sock drawer some day, Eris willing :)

(Quit: sometimes you want to heal the world. .but you just seem to never have a big enough band-aid)

<Kantizuni> brb.. I can't find my list of things I hate... o.o
<Alcar> Kantizuni - don't you just hate that?
<Kantizuni> Alcar: WHOO HOO! I'll add that to the list.

<Kantizuni> I have uploaded my incomplete list of things I hate to my webpage. I only have 6 pages thus far. I'm planning on turning it into a novel.

<|337C4bB4g3> Only you can prevent forest fires. Only an Elite Space Monkey can destroy galaxies with the flick of a wrist! Which would you prefer? Become an Elite Space Monkey today!!!

<SoNegaGaiden> Alcar: In your opinion, but if you claim you are a Christian and kill or do something EXTREME in the name of it then you're a Christian Extremist, doesn't matter if you're christian or not.
<SoNegaGaiden> Same goes for Mr. Bin Laden.
<Alcar> Doing something in the name of something doesn't make you thant thig, SoNegaGaiden. Thats stupid.
<SoNegaGaiden> You can't just be a human extremist it doesn't make sense.
<o____o> Ok, try this then. Is an exterme pacifist somebody who kills for that cause?

You mean you didn't miss me? you havn't talked to me in a whole day or so. what kind of online aquaintance are you!? you're supposed to miss me every waking hour

<Alcar> hmm, my psi just billed me for September 1`st ...
<Alcar> err, psi = isp. *sighs*
<Baliadoc> wouldn't your psi bill you for next months bill? :)

... It wantsss to know what we hass on our hard drivesss, Precioussss...

jeeze, all of you people trying to turn my favorite characters into serial killers =P

* Koby` is semi-busy, typing stuff for bali for sexc
<Koby`> sec
<Sirius-> sex?
<Sirius-> ohhhhh?
* Sirius- grins and laughs
* Koby` hates getting those 2 letters mixed up :)
<Sirius-> maybe thats why they are next to each other on the key bord... the curse of the underpaied guy who made it

(Quit: When the going gets tough, the tough get the crap beaten out of them by the tougher.)

<SpiriTech> black: back the in india or the indus harrappa civilization.. the ancient hindu sages are already using complex mathematical formulas to measure distance of earth to sun and they have also identified the 9 planets in the solar system.. and all is maths working with religion 6500 yrs ago.. now do you have any simple intelligence to comprehend that??
<Black-in-Black> hey spirt...that a load of crapola because they ALL religious fanatics
<SpiriTech> black: it doesnt mean that if you aer stupid others are!

Nobody's perfect. There was one guy - but we killed him.

It was as if God created language so these people could use it to curse Him. - SpiriTech

(Quit: If sacrifice was fate's design, I'd give up my possessions for quiet moments spent with you...beneath the cloak of Heaven's wings.)

"Faith: not wanting to know what is true." - Friedrich Nietzsche (1844-1900)

it's simple. Repeat after me: People are morons. We must accept that objective truth doesn't change no matter how stupid we become.

I still think Anatarctica will rise up and conquer the globe.

(Quit: I like my whiskey on ice and my woman on fire!)

I have never understood how you can wear high heels and not injure yourself

And why is High School called high school anyway. its not very high. You get high there I suppose, but thats unrelated

I want to see a business card that says professional philosopher "So, what do you do for a living?" "I think"

HS couselors are a cancer upon humanity

I remember a law prof who proved a student didn't exist.

That argument is so full of holes that it's like... something that is very full of holes!

if violence and suffering were not good things, why would there be so many people doing it?

Jesus=Luke, John the Baptist=Han Solo, Paul=C-3P0, Luke=R2-D2, Mark=Wedge Antillies, Mary Magdalin=Princess Leia, King Pilot(?)=Grand Moff Tarkin, Solomon=Chewbacca, Judas=Darth Vader, Jar Jar Binks=Satan.

you know, someday years and years from now, someone's gonna go "Yeah a liked the Star Wars series. The last three were the best tho. I guess they realize what they did wrong in the first ones and made the later ones better." Then when someone tells them about the real order, they'll either be horrified or won't believe it :)

<Tonitrus> About the people in hell (paraphrase): "They will hate the darkness, but they will hate the light even more. C.S. Lewis was right in saying that the doors to hell would be locked from the inside." (food for thought)
<Koby`> Tonitrus - I'd lock the doors of hell from the inside too with all the telemarketers hevean sends down there :p

God designs Hell but disaproves of showing a tittie on TV. Go figure that one out.

Heaven sounds like hell to me. You are forced to live forever, can't shut it off. Must give up all "sinful" things (ie, fun things) and must stroke the most massive ego even conceived for all eternity. I'll take the lake of fire please.

<grneyedlady> :) geninirai, hi i havent seen you in a while
<GeminiRai> well I've been dead. its not as easy to climb out of your grave as it looks in the movies

<GeminiRai> Candace is Jane's daughter's aunt's husband's daughter's sister. What is the relationship between Candance and Jane?
<Alcar> Candance is Jane's other personality.
<Spinelli> i know ! i know! its her brother :)

"If I die before I wake, Then sleeping was a big mistake"

no.. he said he wasn't Christian.. but I dunno if that illiminates him from believing in the same God that you do.. since you believe there is -only- one God.. then how coudl he believe in any other Gods..

I see more evidence that I'm right then that you are wrong, mainly because I am blind, deaf and paralyzed, and only my thoughts exist to me

Slow and steady may not always win the race, but at least it doesn't end up splattered on the walls.

Give up the search for the Truth: settle for a good lie instead.

Everyone repeat after me, "We are not a disability."

(Quit: "The Possibilities Are Infinite. The Realities Are One." -Nobody Important)

(Quit: Numb to what was.. or isn't... or is to come. I'm not sure which yet.)

whats the point of old people? theyre nearly dead anyway

death is kinda like getting out of jail after a life sentence.....

somebody should make a crpg called "Resident Moron" where you create a character and have to venture thru something like bg2 but u dont control the party, just ur own character. the rest of the part is controlled by specially programmed artificial ignorance

(Quit: If the Internet stop existing today, will you still have a life?)

Some say the glass is half empty, some say the glass is half full. Myself, I say the glass is too big.

The only definition of God that seems grand enough turns God into a sort of mind-like transcendent reality which would no more be capable of coming down to earth as a person than Gravity could, or Death. I think the Christian God is much too small.

<Kimmey> Who's missing?
<Keith`> my attention span
<Kimmey> that can't be missing, you never had one
<Keith`> use too then i hit puberity, go figur

I remember the day I changed my last diaper. One of life's rites of passage. I'm surprised nobody has thought to turn it into a sacrament yet.

You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say will be misquoted, then used against you.

<Lassie`> JewsforJudaism - The problem with your so-called arguement is that you assume the right is inalienable sloely because it is written in the declaration. Thats it. using that logic, I can say that all dogs cna fly if sprinkled with fairy dust, because Peter Pan says so. and its inalienable because I say so too. I'll write it down somewhere.
<JewsforJudaism> Lassie`: such intensity! <s>
<Lassie`> sorry, this is just my reaction to blatant stupidity. Its nothing personal :)

I did a lot of soul searching while I was gone. Didn't find a damn thing and that's why they made me come back here. They keep saying that I should get back to a familiar environment, even it is online

I'm eccentric Christian.. mixxed with zen.. and confused as hell.

hotmail, the technology of yesterday still here now.

diplomacy is nothing more than knowing whose ass to have your nose in at what time

I got a free disk from America Online today! They're so nice!

(Quit: I don't believe in fate or destiny. I believe in various degrees of hatred, paranoia, and abandonment. However much of that gets heaped upon you doesn't matter - it's only a matter of how much you can take and what it does to you. - Henry Rollins)

If you're thinking about taking up crocheting, DON'T! It was invented by some evil french genius as a form of insidious self-torture, which you won't realize until after 12 hours have passed by and you have only 2 rows of stitches.

I'm engaged...and that doesnt mean Im dead...the female body is a peice of art to me and Ill be darned if I stop admiring it :)

trap and marriage being in the same sentence....imagine that :P

"Love doesn't consist of gazing at each other, but of looking outward together in the same direction" --Antoine de Saint-Exupéry

"We come to love not by finding a perfect person, but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly." - Anonymous

honestly.. I'm not sure what love is or isn't.. my idea's of love change and fade.. through experiences.. There's a point where one can't explain how or why something is or isn't.. you just rely upon mutual understanding..

6* qwerty is very well adjusted to the society he lives in... which ironically appears to make qwerty very poorly adjusted to the society he lives in :-1

my wife the elementary teacher is talking about mandatory steralization again :-)

MENtal illness, MENstrual cramps, MENtal breakdown, MENopause. Ever notice how all of women's problems start with men?

lol, bin laden dead yet again huh, i still like my moms idea about what to do with the SOB. snag him alive then take him to secret medical phsility give him a sex change then send him back

the greater the size of the corporation, the greater the bloat of the web page

i was gonna procrastinate, but i never got around to it

If you give two people an issue and they claim to agree about their opinion on it, then haven't looked deep enough into it.

integral has implications of calculus, which strikes terror into the hearts of many young individuals

<krsna> but how do you know its the best, unless you have tried it all? :)
<Alcar> krsna - People don't apply that to sex, so why should they to religon? :)
<qwerty> Alcar: that's pretty good :-)
<michaelll> Alcar: wow..you just came up with something.. instead of what would Jesus do... we should be saying...what would we do if this were sex :)
* qwerty thinks that's dangerous :-/

According to United Press International, the Rocklin, Calif., Unified School District and the ACLU are fighting over a "God Bless America" sign posted outside Breen Elementary after the terrorist attacks on Sept. 11. ACLU says the posting of the phrase on a school building marquee is unconstitutional and that the words send a "hurtful, divisive message." The school district, however, supported Breen's actions and did not ask the school to remove the sign.

* qwerty thinks a Buddhist would say something akin to ``the love of ANYTHING is the root of all evil'' :-)

go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.

<Impious> God created sex. Priests created marriage.
<Nevaeh> Impious.. hmm.. or maybe God created marriage... and priests created sex ;) *winks*

<Nevaeh> Jack, what do you define "soul" as being?
<Alcar> Nevaeh - 4 letters, 2 of them vowels.

of the delights of this world, man cares most for sexual intercourse, yet he has left it out of his heaven.

something I wrote...I will have to type it up sometime on my computer...I read it and though..my God...I had multiple personality disorder then LOL

if the Bible limited itself to what's important to people it would not have a single parable, nor a single historical account. Instead, it would be an instructional manual of undoubtable wisdom and authority, and it would be extremely short.

the invisible and the non-existent look very much alike.

ignorance is the mother of devotion.

to me, faith is not better because it is atheistic rather than theistic. I am an atheist because of a *lack* of faith, *not* because of a different faith.

<Rex_Goodheart> Max_K, LOL. I think people would get quickly bored of watching bots talking to each other.
<krsna> tonitrus: well, it was trying to create randomness from our collective random responses! :)
<Nevaeh> Rex_Goodheart you're overestimating people on IRC!

Quit (Quit: If wishes were horses, everywhere would smell like horse manuer.)

(Quit: Don't look a gift horse in the mouth. Unless it happens to be a giant wooden horse, given to you by your mortal enemies. In that case, light it on fire.)

Take three advil and nudge me in the morning. Err.. call me in the morning. o.o

(Quit: You can pretend to be serious; you can't pretend to be witty. - Sacha Guitry (1885-1957))

remember kids, arguing on the internet is like running in the special olympics...you may win, but you're still a retard

<Necrobiosis> sticks and stones will break my bones but words will never hurt me
<Maleficus> because your still to stupid to see the point

If he dosent get to belive in stereotypes, then I dont get to beleive in Taxes, even though I pay them out the ass every other friday :)

<Max_K> who needs roman numerals anyways ???
<Alcar> romans.
<Max_K> romans are dead
<Alcar> tell that to people living in the city of rome
<Max_K> they still use those numerals ???
<Max_K> no way man, you can't do any significant math with them
<Bolognaus> yes you can!
<Bolognaus> its just a bit harder.
<Max_K> try finding a derivative of MCMLXXXLX*X^II :)
<Max_K> guess which X is a 10 and which is a variable :)

(Quit: This user has performed an illegal operation and will be terminated.)

I'm sort of borderline. I have the drawbacks of being considered a nerd, but without most of the up sides. (like there really are any anyway..)

<DJ^Krush> Portable God V1.2 - New bugfix - Only smites heathens now
<yetifemme> Requires 233 MHz or faster Intel Pentium processor, 32 mb ram, 300 mb, 2mb pci or agp video card, and divX 7
<yetifemme> Some violent content, not recommended for users under the age of 18

The main problem I see with proving or disproving the existence of God is (a) Which model of God do you adopt in your testing? (b) What method can you employ to measure something which is immesuarable

http://www.god.com/answers.htm 404 not found

(Quit: The Dungeon Master you have dialed has been disconnected.)

it would be very boring to operate outside any constraints whatsoeve, kinda like turning God Mode on in Quake :)

I don't believe in God, you think I believe in the X-Files? :-P

in fact, I guess that's my definition of ``art film''... = no brain candy and no eye candy :-)

I figure a movie should give me one or more of the following: An adrenaline rush, An idea to ponder, An erection.

<Alcar{awayawayo}> Science: Taking the magic out of magic, one step at a time :)
<Max_K> Religion - filling magick with bs one load at a time

(Quit: The revelations of divine truth are not sealed except by human ignorance, bigotry and narrow-minded intolerance.)

"'Artificial intelligence' has the same relation to 'intelligence' as 'artificial flowers' have to 'flowers'"

(Quit: The real arguments of atheism - Argument From Superiority: "(1) If God exists, then I am an inferior being (2) But I am a freethinker, which makes me superior (3) Therefore, God does not exist")

So I have to use Windows, and I can't play games. This must be what hell is like.

(Quit: "Thinking is the hardest work there is, which is probably the reason so few engage in it." - Henry Ford)

(Quit: I don't want the world... i just want your half...)

(Quit: "It's time to kick ass and chew bubble gum.........and I'm all outta gum." - Duke Nukem, great American hero.)

I don't even think an act of God could get Bush re-elected

I am an zen Christian buddhist priest with a side of discordianism diced with agnosticism and fueled by deism mixed in pantheism served on all white bread.

<yetifemme> If God created human existence from a certain point forward, what's to stop him from having created it from that point backward, as well?
<yetifemme> I mean, uh!
* Alcar looks at yetifemme
<Alcar> Ok, that one made my head hurt.

(Quit: "Half of life is fucking up - the other half is dealing with it." - Henry Rollins)

<yetifemme> We were supposed to interpret this advertisement from a magazine
<yetifemme> Which was for Halibut, but had women in bikinis lounging around on the beach
<yetifemme> I basically wrote that it was a good advertisement, because instead of being enslaved in servitude to their male opressors by cooking Halibut from scratch, they were rejoicing in the company of their female companions on the beach.

Seeing as I define what is real and unreal by what exists inside and outside the mind, any product of the inner mind would therefore be fictional. That includes pretty much everything. I don't know what isn't fictional, but for practical purposes I define whatever's boring and unimaginative as non-fiction.

(Quit: In a world without walls and fences, who needs windows and gates?)

* Keith` is your tipitcal while male who choses to worship women instead of any so called god

that when i claimed to be an undead physicist, he had more trouble with the claim that the undead state was caused by an accident with holy water and a particle accelerator than the fact that i was undead

I don't really consider Windows an OS. It's a DOS patch :P

isn't saying don't generalize a generalization which assumes that there is no time in which it is appropriate to generalize?

you could call the police and report a person of your description poking around your house suspiciously and break into a run when they come

(Quit: "and fight them on until there is no more persecution and the religion becomes Allah's(2:193))

I wouldn't take the job, 'cause I'm not qualified to do it. The thing is, that stops me, but I've noticed it doesn't stop other people

you know what sucks about being a computer genius, is that you speak a whole different language from mere mortals. So when you have to interface with people... I mean talk to people... how do they know whether you're a computer genius or you're just one of those people who strings big words together?

Anyone who calls themselves a visionary probably isn't.

I don't have morals, I have a recognition that society will take away my freedom if I do something that they perceive as wrong. - Halocy

A myth simply is a symbolic story that allegorizes a philosophy.

the whine fest and paranoia that's gripping america is annoying the crap out of me... oh for crying out loud people GIVE IT A REST!..... Yeah, bad stuff happened, and you know what? bad stuff will happen again. That's the way the world works. Get over it and go ON with your lives.

(Quit: Save me from EverCrack... please...?)

you may want to start doing research, ask a few questions.. you may be able to shampoo ferrets

here's an interesting thing... do u know that if you put a pool cue ball into your mouth, you can't remove it?

(Quit: Time is the corruptor of Man.)

I was born here heheh. it's very depressing. I never knew how much this place sucked until we moved here. the only good thing that's ever happened is my birth! and even that can't compensate! That's how sucky it is! :D

your right i can't tell you what to do, but i can damn sure make you wish I had!!!

(Quit: "Watch your thoughts; they become words. Watch your words; they become actions. Watch your actions; they become habbits. Watch your habbits; they become character. Watch your character; it becomes your density...")

(Quit: My attempts to become a rebel as a youth have remained completely fruitless, largely to the fact that my father once told me that I could be pretty much anything I wanted, including an axe murderer, as long as I didn't become a lawyer.)

(Quit: "Kind of like sniffing a couple hundred thousand magic markers while getting a slow sheet lightning enema isnt it." -God)

<o____o> How many Robins have their been, and how many did Batman have sex with?
<Alcar> o____o - I dont think we want to know. I do find it suspicious that batman lived alone with 2 men and never married tho :p

humanity: The quality of being humane; the kind feelings, dispositions, and sympathies of man; especially, a disposition to relieve persons or animals in distress, and to treat all creatures with kindness and tenderness.

<yetifemme> I have to find a feminist-type topic to do a presentation on tomorrow. :/
<aslhk> equivalent pay
<Alcar> yetifemme - Why Staying Home To Raise Children Is Not A Bad Thing :)
<yetifemme> Equivalent pay in the sex trade
<aslhk> The Role Of Women In Society
<yetifemme> There Was Nothing Wrong With The Fifties
<DJ^krush> Females are under-represented in Star Trek conventions
<Alcar> There Was Nothing Wrong With The Fifties The Sixties Didnt Cure? :)

The worst solution for prejudice is to focus of the differences that its based upon <-- maybe that's better phrased

Wobbly legs are a disability. We couches should get special treatment for them ;p

* Alcar thinks that all christians are dsylexic and turned satan into santa every christmas to indulge in evil materialism

"Bakers cover their mistakes with icing, lawyers cover their mistakes with words, and doctors cover their mistakes with dirt."

Social workers, in my humble experience, are the most messed up people you'll ever be likely to meet.

Anybody would HAVE to be messed up to want to be a social worker, that or truly naive.

<Sin{Away}> how's it feal to be a dolt?
<Sin{Away}> I mean, adult :)
<Chaos`^> a dolt?
<Chaos`^> lol It feels like it did before, except I don't have to use my parents names to enter into contests

santa is cold and malicious, which is why he likes the north pole so much

Pepsi has Brittany Spears commercials. Coke has the Polar Bear commercials. The conclusion is simple. Pepsi sucks, and could possibly be considered evil, whereas Coke is pretty much ok.

<Baliadoc> although it was good to see Krypto return :)
<Baliadoc> "He's got a dog." "That shoots lasers." "Cool."
<Baliadoc> of course, it got silly after that. their strategy for beating the martians was to pull the Moon into a low earth orbit, thereby lighting them all on fire :)
<Baliadoc> well, it's a good idea. in theory. but it really shouldn't be practiced :)
<|337C4Bb4g3> "Why was that a bad idea?"
<|337C4Bb4g3> "Well, it did rip most of the earth's atmosphere away, and killed 90% of the population"
<|337C4Bb4g3> "It killed the martians, didn't it?"

<aslhk> coke is such a great drink / coke is just the best / even when it's bad coke / it still beats all the rest (give me a 'c', give me an 'o', give me a 'k', give me an 'e'! What's that spell? It spells pepsi sucks compared to coke! but in an abbreviated manner.)
<Alcar> The best drink to have is coke / its better than anything people smoke / its far better than drinking pepsi / because nothing rhymes with pepsi. The end.
<aslhk> Shall I compare thee to a summer's day? / It would be much more fair / than to compare you to coke.

<Alcar> This is a haiku / Its about the best drink - coke / It is the best drink.
<aslhk> I don't think they really count though
<aslhk> unless they're about nature
<aslhk> so it should be something like
<aslhk> Rosebuds in winter / know what the best drink is called / the drink is called coke.

<Alcar> In summer green leaves / and the verdant trees whisper / coke will make me grow

<aslhk> The dead tree limbs fall / victims of a lesser drink / the drink called pepsi.

<Alcar> It is sumer now / And even dying of thirt / we won't drink pepsi

<aslhk> britney spears, evil / was in pepsi commercial / and solid trees winced.

<aslhk> haikus are not meant / to degrade the good soft drink / named coca-cola.

<Alcar> chrunchy candy canes / for christmas and santa too / wear the coke colours

<Alcar> On mount olympus / Greek gods dined on honeyed mead / Until they tried coke

<aslhk> If ever a drink / deserves to be damned to hell / that drink is pepsi.

<aslhk> There once was a man who drank pepsi / and boy was his liver messy / because that stupid drink / destroyed it I think / he should've drank coke like Bessy.

<M|553ry> "If God had wanted us to use the metric system, Jesus would have had 10 apostles."
<michaelll> or 100... wow now that could have made for one LAST supper hehe... it would have had to have been a buffet :)

(Quit: Since each of us were several, there was already quite a crowd.)

(Quit: There is a world I believe in, a world in which I have faith. But this world, is only a dream.)

I think in time, as the world becomes more and more secular, "God" will become interepretted more and more differently until a thousand years or so from now God means nothing but "love" or "kindness" with no personage / deity to it. And then some nutty christians will say "Thats what it meant all along" and I will tear my hair out

God said love thine enemy, and well, the Health Dept says tobacco and liquor is the enmy

* RaionaBot pretends not to be sentient

I think the only reason kids can appear cute at times is so their parents dont just murder them.

It takes one tree to make 10,000 matches, but one match to burn 10,000 trees.

Has anyone had the uniquely frightening experience of meeting their grandparent's new girl/boyfriend?

"Good Manners in Wartime Reporting" -A Guide to Government Censorship

The truth cannot be hidden, my friend, but secret messages hidden in corpses can remain undelivered.

(Quit: I have seen God, and he is an op in #sex)

empathic/telepathic abilities? we don't lock them away, we put them on the phones and they charge us $3.00 a minute to talk to them

it's a fact that widely recognized facts are often wrong or just opinions in any case.

(Quit: Oh yeah, life goes on, long after the thrill of livin' is gone)

the easiest way to enlarge your understanding of relaity is get out in the world and talk to people, read magazines, watch people, see things, experience the world ... chattering about etthereal concepts that have no application to daily life won't further anything but your own confusion

I often find myself lusting for giant triangles

I'm just sitting here talking and then you say something completely clever and then I look dumb. I should make more friends with stupid people just so that I look good. :)

<aslhk> I just always think I look good, no matter what!
<aslhk> saves trouble ;)
<Alcar> must be hard on the ego tho :p
<aslhk> I haven't been able to do myself justice
<aslhk> but we all have crosses to bear and all of that

haha, I'm such a retard. I shouldn't actually ever read anything that I write.

you want a good fantasy movie just take starwars a new hope and edit out all the high tech stuff :)

dogs have sex with everything

it's probably natural to want to expand your palette and sample all the tastes life has on offer, including the taste of human flesh

<Alcar> Whats a better life?
<Unknown_Soldier78> a life where you can travel somewhat freely without a fear of being eaten

<Unknown_Soldier78> by the way your propagating cannabalism is absurd beacsue if you really believed you wouldnt be sitting in your home enjoying internet acces because the local ISP providers would be too damn scared to come over
<DJ^Krush> Unknown_Soldier78: sure they came over, but I'm not saying anything about them leaving afterward
<Alcar> Unknown_Soldier78 - no one ever said cannibalism meant that you kil and eat everyone you see. THAT would be absurd. They'd surely have to bathe first.

If it's ok to eat animals without their consent why is it not ok to have sex with them without their consent?

it is not natural to fuck a donkey!

<Mr_bake_o> we dont go around and purposely demote ourselfs to animalls
<Alcar> We ARE animals
<Mr_bake_o> we are mamals
<Mr_bake_o> not animals
<Alcar> uh.
<aslhk> quote file!
<Mr_bake_o> and animal is a beast!

i'd certainly rather be raped by a monkey than killed

So the Bible that we know was written by some doped up hippies sittin on a rock in Bethleham?

I thought about seeing what a good electromagnet would do to the computer lab as a science experiment in high school =P I decided against it though

but yeah, the tooth fairy is harder to explain. At least Santta can be rationalised off as an FBI agent.

Toys Returned (AP) - All toys from Santa's workshop have been delayed a the border due to being suspected terrorist packages. Christmas will now be held in late January after they have been examined by the authorities.

(Quit: And if you fall you are only human, but when if you fall on me, it hurts. I'm not your Jesus Christ, save yourself.)

The Day Santa Evaded Cruise Missiles. A Story Book.

<ArtQ-AFK> you're your own worse enemy
<Dalener> I'm my own favored enemy. your own enemy is your cholestrol

<Keith`> can i ask for a bit of help on my spelling for a minet?
<AlcarDM> Sure
<Keith`> serus ??
<Keith`> seareus....
<AlcarDM> Why wouldn't I be?
<Keith`> no thats what i'm asking
<Keith`> how do i spell it
<AlcarDM> oh!

<o____o> You think the toilet brush WANTS to go into the toilet bowl? You think the toilet bowl WANTS to get pooped in?
<yetifemme> ... good point. o_o
<o____o> It is abuse of the highest order
<yetifemme> I had not considered the plight of toilet bowls
<o____o> And the flyswatter said "I was just following orders"
<yetifemme> I am ashamed of my passivity in the face of opression
<yetifemme> I'm going to go apologize to my toilet right now

God created men first, cause you always make a rough draft before a masterpiece!

Last night I was looking at the stars and I was wondering where the heck is my ceiling!

(Quit: When you educate a man, you educate a man, when you educate a woman, you educate a nation)

<tre> where you at?
<aslhk> We are all at the first day of the rest of our lives and the last day of the not-rest of our lives!
<tre> what

<aslhk> everything is funny
<aslhk> if it wasn't funny, it wouldn't happen =P
<Caltak> Everything is, except for the things that aren't.
<aslhk> nope
<aslhk> even the things that aren't funny are funny
<aslhk> they're just very discrete about it

I would be an English Major except for the fact that I hate English Class

my computer makes art all of the time. it learned the rules 1)Crash repeatedly 2)repeat 1 until user goes crazy and starts to smash things 3)behold the smashed things, for they are Art.

The bueaty of art is in the simple fact that there are no rules; that everything is art. Then again, if everyone realized this, there would be no need for Art museums, and creating them would be quite a pain, as it is fairly difficult to make a building to house Everything.

you can't argue with something that's never wrong, it only ends in pain and whatnot

christianity requires that certain presumptions are made and accepted as true, as does islam. the presumptions are different for both religions. It is difficult to perform a logical debate with someone when one does not agree on which presumptions are true.

* qwerty finds dead puppies funny, if it's done the right way

I don't see why people think logic proves things. Logic itself requires an 'if'. If this, then this. That is not a conclusive proof. Only a proof that 'if' something, then something.

<TheScribe> "A wise warrior fights with both a weapon and intellect" "An even wiser warrior fights with a shield as well"
<PEa> what about armour? :)

(Quit: We like to talk big. I'm going to destroy the world. That's just tough guy talk. Strutting around with your friends over a pint of blood. The truth is, I like this world. Billions of people walking around like Happy Meals with legs. It's all right here)

<Sintaqx> My relationship with Microsoft is completely platonic. I don't screw with it, and it doesn't screw me.

I apologize. Go ahead and make your unreasonable and closed minded statements :)

For better or worse, society places a higher premium on sexual protection than life. We can justify several ways to kill you without your permission, but none to screw you without it.

No wonder you are so unhappy... if I was that moronic, I would be unhappy, too!

i dont even think god could get into #christian

People who tell you they know more about whats in your own head that you do are as bad as religious people who say that they kow what God(s) want for you

"Jesus Loves Me, Even Though I Am A Piece Of Shit And Suck And Should Die And Burn In Hell For All Eternity" I think that's a good title for a poem

I'm nobody, are you nobody two? I sure hope not, because I don't like that guy.

Anger must be diverted. It's like grounding! Anger -> parent -> child -> dog -> chew toy.

Okay. Here is my theory: a) he's old; b) his wife is old; c) he's constantly surrounded by ugly, old people. My guess is that he will leap at the chance to have an illicit affair with me.

Isn't a false God just a manifestation of a true God? Given that God is All That Is

<yetifemme> I'm just saying that death shouldn't be such a great barrier if we truly are possessed of a soul which exists at the same time in another plane, unhindered by the physical.
<Tonitrus> yetifemme, no, but death will still suck. It'll be really disorienting, for one thing.

I ceased to appreciate flowers after learning they are basically genitals.

<Tonitrus> aslhk, I've known that God existed when I first saw him congeal out of the shadows in the moonlight, and he swam through the darkness and sang to me.
<Tonitrus> Perhaps you're just not perceptive.
<aslhk> Tonitrus: perhaps god has not made himself as evident to me as he has to you =P
<aslhk> perhaps you're just insane?
<aslhk> there're many options
<Tonitrus> I am insane, but that's not relevant.

<troubles666> i got banned for no reason
<Dalener> Uh, you were screaming you like little girls
<troubles666> oh yeah. that was oingo boingo though
<troubles666> i thought it was appropriate at that moment.

william shatner's utter lack of acting skills prove that there's a god! how else could he have got a lead role?

<Kantizuni> If they gave me 5.5 trillion I could be creative.
* Alcar takes 5.5 trillion, buys nuclear biombs and says "This is my new art piece. Its called armageddon."

James Michener THINKS he gets paid by the word

they pay authors by the word in most magazine thingies, but they don't end up like dickens, thank the lord and all of that =P

An optomitrist tells this guy he's going blind. He says "You've got to stop masturbating." The guy says, "That can't make you go blind!" The optomitrist says, "Yeah, but the patients in the waiting room complain."

(Quit: Attention Holiday Shoppers... Get into the holiday spirit... and SPEND, SPEND, SPEND!!!)

(Quit: back in the beginning there was adam and eve/big big bang or whatever you believe/maybe something else brought us here/someday it might reappear/maybe we're the aliens --tam!)

<SolaSum> The only problem is with those who don't recognize that they have 'bats in their belfries' and immediately either dismiss paradoxes as 'nonsense' or rush to rash justifications for them
<qwerty> SolaSum: which, speaking of Zen, makes me think of ``how can I fill your cup if you do not first empty it'' ;-)
<TheShrike> qwerty, LOL ain't that the truth. It's relatively easy to learn things. Unlearning things you have no use for is realllllllly difficult

I fear anything that wants to wipe your mind so you are free to absorb their ideologies without question.

I was reading some Joseph Campbell, and he brings up an interesting point about the differences between Eastern and Western thought. The goal of Westerners is to become an individual, to become independent, the goal of Easterners is to wipe out individual identity and to merge with something bigger than oneself

it wouldn't have to make for a hellish world, we live in one already!

the gladatorial arena in Rome made conflict sacred, but didn't make it religious. Making violence romantic isn't the sole domain of religion

my wife told me a story today... a substitute teacher where she works was saying the solution to America's problems is to bring institutionalized prayer back into public schools (that's not the funny part... it's coming) when my wife says ``but doesn't that violate segregation of church and state?'' she responds ``I'm not talking about the state... just public schools''

my wife says there are only two kinds of teachers... the kind who loved going to school and want it to last forever, and the kind who hated going to school and want to fix it :-)

Imnsho, teachers are there to teach people. Not stand and talk and flunk whoever doesn't turn in the homework. :/

I imagine it comes down to the fact that teachers are about the lowest paid profession that requies a university education... what kind of people are you going to get doing a job that pays crap? Only the committed and the incompetent

yeah, but same thing stands... SCHOOL'S CAN'T TEACH YOUR KIDS if YOU'VE NEVER TAUGHT YOUR KIDS. I think the problem is sociological... not educational

The constitution is of no importance if no one honors it. And who would want to do something asinine like that?

(Quit: Trespassers will be shot, survivors will be shot again)

that reminds me of something my 5th-grade teacher told me, oddly... he said ``the constitution is flexible to the point where it is legal to, by democratic decision, dispense with the constitution and become a communist country''

your work sounds more and more like an evil pit of hell..

the agnostics who call themselves atheists are actually saying somerthing like "I'm a gray atheist" ... like "I'm a gray black person" they are referring to shades of atheism instead of admitting, well im actually an agnostic.some of that is due, imo, to the fact that they hang out in #atheism and feel peer pressured into conforning that everyone in there professes to be an atheist, ergo i must be one too even though im actually an agnostic but cant admit it so they say things like soft atheist (closet agnostic)

* Religionist is an soft christian taoist agnostic

Never insult a man 'til you've walked a mile in his shoes. That way, not only are you a mile away when you insult him, you also have his shoes

I'm three things: an intellectaul and a mathematician.

I always feel clever, but that's mostly due to my opposible thumbs.

but when I step on someones punch line, I not only get to feel clever, but I get the sastification of knowing that everyone else _knows_ I'm clever

When his life was ruined, his family killed, his farm destroyed, Job knelt down on the ground and yelled up to the heavens, "Why god? Why me?" and the thundering voice of God answered, "There's just something about you that pisses me off."

"When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bicycle. Then I realised that the Lord doesn't work that way so I stole one and asked Him to forgive me."

"Whenever I watch TV and see those poor starving kids all over the world, I can't help but cry. I mean I'd love to be skinny like that but not with all those flies and death and stuff."

i keep trying to read the bible but a more interesting book always comes along

Wise man once said 'it's easier to find something to do than to do it.'

With a little wax, a stick of dynamite can easily pass for a candle

<aslhk> and what emotions does black leather convey?
<WumpScut> how she is depressed... and how she is always thinking about sex
<aslhk> black leather doesn't mean that to me ;)
<aslhk> it means "I used to be a cow!"

so can you have a goth state of mind in a pink dress?

Floods are a great way to get rid of bodies. Toss em in the creek and the remains will be difficult to identify, let alone determine the cause of death

closest I come to doing drugs is agreeing with Bill Hicks =)

<Tonitrus> I wonder why no religion promotes poor eating habits, lack of sleep, and an unwise refusal to accept your limitations?
<michaelll> Tonitrus: because if a religion promoted that...you would be its MESSENGER ;)
<TheShrike> Tonitrus, oh, there is one. It's called the Cult of Capitalism, American Branch =)

My therapist is worried as well. I tell him he worries too much, and I try to charge him $80 for 50 minutes. Oh well, maybe one of these days it'll work

(Quit: Men always want to be a woman's first love - women like to be a man's last romance.")

"whan aprile withe showerse soughte, the droughte of marche hath piercede to the roote, and bathede every vein in swich liquore, of which vertu enganderede is the floure." chaucer, canturbury tales, general prolouge... it is so easy to rhyme when every word end with an e:)

I had a teacher one time that said she was very blunt. If she'd truly been blunt, she would've said tactless.

(Quit: I'm the kind of person who dyes his hair blue and then doesn't want anyone to notice.)

the problem with an omnipotent god is jesus is dead, lennon is dead and so is marley

I was talking to someone who had cats and being someone who hasnt had a pet since I was little...I mentioned picking up a book about cats...and the person nearly coughed up a lung laughing at me for wanting to actually buy a book on how to take care of a cat! heh

If you gaze too long into the abyss and the abyss proceeds to makes faces at you, you should become worried

(Quit: "I still say a church steeple with a lightening rod on top shows a lack of confidence." - Doug McLeod)

(Quit: "I cannot agree with those who rank modesty among the virtues. To the logician all things should be seen exactly as they are, and to underestimate one's self is as much a departure from truth as to exaggerate one's own powers.")

when you're as starved for intellectual stimulation as I am, you tend to take what you can get. Even if it involves psychopaths, as in the case with a former roommate

but what about when you eventually, inevitably get bored with sexuality?

Hmmm hell is suffering, suffering is life, deliverance from hell is non-existance? :)

you are not you. you are the I that is having the experience of being you.

* Eltanan has thoughts in more than three dimensions. they're weird.

<Annhilation-of-the-Whole> music was the first true invention
<Alcar> no, that was sex
<Annhilation-of-the-Whole> no it wasnt
<Annhilation-of-the-Whole> before sex came music
<Annhilation-of-the-Whole> and art
<Annhilation-of-the-Whole> eveything we do is an art
<Alcar> oh. So like doing the lambada and porn?

Hey, when I actually do get to the computer, one of the first things I do is get out my mIRC. I'll bet my bf thinks I ignore him sometimes.

meter is just another dimension of meaning. if you aren't trying to convey something *very* specific by the lack of a meter, I think you fall under suspicion of laziness

I guess when you become a "poet" you get to stick a laurel leaf up your butt and walk around like that all the time

<Alcar> hnmm.. why the alteration between rhyming and not rhyming?
<allfemale> I don't know
<allfemale> I just write

<TripFontaine> does anyone catch this nick?
<Kattelyn> trip, its vaguely familiar, but I know so many things its hard to pin down

<michaelll> if god made the universe in 7 days...what did he do during the nights???
<aslhk> michaelll: he made really nice watches. how else could he know when a day had passed without the earth and the sun?

oh the wars are all run by freemasons though...

it's hardly rational to discount something you know nothing about because you know nothing about it.

so basically, what you think people should do is cast off their illusions and follow yours?

The Tragedy of Life is What Dies Inside a Man When He Lives

(Quit:DOS Tip #17: Add DEVICE=FNGRCROS.SYS to CONFIG.SYS)

Had to go see family. it's real depressing to see what genetics probibly has in store for me :(

* Eimi-chan is not capable of thought. She is capable of debating pop music, however.

d2 is just d1 without the cheating, and let's face it, d1 wasn't that great to begin with. Anyone who labeled diablo an RPG is the same kind of person who thinks halflife is an RPG cause you play "gordon freeman"

<Alexander_Summoning___stuff> it has vibrate mode ;b
<Alexander_Summoning___stuff> don't they have that on the US cell phones?
<Alexander_Summoning___stuff> japanese cell phones are really high-tech ;b
<AlcarDM> of course they do
<AlcarDM> Its why US cell phones are big.

(Quit: To the world you may be one person, but to one person you may be the world.)

I consider spirit who I truly am...and soul is the individual experience of that

it was so amazingly english teacherish that i wanted to vomit...i felt like a cheap whore after writing it

Ure not a woman until you have partitioned your harddrive.

<|337C4Bb4g3> belief is reserved for things that you admit may not be true
<|337C4Bb4g3> which makes belief rather silly
<|337C4Bb4g3> because to believe is to accept a proposition and reject other propositions without sufficient evidence to justify such a decision
<DJ^Krush> No, I think belief is the only sensible option
<|337C4Bb4g3> Well in that case
<|337C4Bb4g3> shouldn't you either believe everything
<|337C4Bb4g3> or believe nothing?

Don't let the troll escape, while you argue... :( *points to the confused being huddled in the corner in terror*

Two octopi aren't spelled 'octopii' and there's no reason why 'viri' should be spelled 'virii'

who cares about the idea. its a good solution

Not wise to suggest to somebody that they are a killer and then stand there before them the most available person to be killed.

(Quit: Hastur la vista)

<ArthurQ> dammit i know something is not being told to me.......what is it
<Alcar> that you're paranoid? :)
<ArthurQ> ......

(Quit: whats the point of old people? theyre nearly dead anyway)

(Quit: You wear guilt, like shackles on your feet, like a halo in reverse.)

(Quit: Life is like a box of chocolate-covered grasshoppers. The reason eludes me though.)

i'd argue that excellent musical performances elevate dismal lyrics in the same way that excellent writing elevates dismal subjects in poetry and fiction

time kills anything with an expiry date

<Chirron> Shall we outlaw sex for Hispanic women? <-- strange quote of the night

<momteach4> Guys, are you here to praise God? or just talk about inane things?
<^^Maxx^^> Better to talk about inane things than nothing at all..

<Krsnadas> this knowledge is not speculation but authorised from the bhagavad gita.as spoken by the Supreme Personality of Godhead Sri Krsna
<Simon```> as oppossed to knowledge that is not speculation but authorised from the books of Jim Davis as spoken by the cagt Garfield of the comic strip Garfield? :)

Bush has been a cowboy president with a crucafix around his neck

(Quit: there's more than a million questions i could ask but it wouldn't matter at all so take me and tear me open i won't bleed until you're gone)

humans are sadists, made in God's image

Maybe we should work on fighting a war against emotional terrorism as well as mundane-world terrorism. As soon as sexuality returns to being the sacred act of love it is, and not as a weapon for manipulation and degradation, then the smart people will start looking for love again.

(Quit: *Squelch* "Damnit, Thats nasty!" "I know!" "ahhhhhhh" "Eh?eh?eh?" "I LIKE flirst sex" "ewwwww!!")

its odd to be commited to an idea but not be attatched to the outcome

you know..from past poems...I read your poems as if being in the shower like in the movie Psycho..waiting for some big change to happen right at the very end hehe

I think we do ourselves a disservice by only using one school of thought to solve any problem. scientists lose what can't be immediately sensed via the fab five, philosophers often overlook the immediate reality, etc.

is logic capable of allowing for that which cannot be defined logically?

Are there really facts or just theories that haven't been disproved?

(Quit: If you can read this, you probably have an internet connection.)

God is whatever exists to encourage us to go beyond selfishness, to reject isolation, to be fully conscious and fully alive

(Quit: 'I consider the positions of kings and rulers as that of dust motes.' Buddha)

You are what you eat! The more you eat, the more you are! And you can see the results rather quickly! Particularly with less exercise

<Kandi`^> (( Hey sin, did you send those cd's? I'm still getting nothing.. maybe the postal services see it as an anthrax threat.. lol ))
<Sin{Away}> ((I knew I shouldn't have labeled them 'Anthrax, volume 1 and 2'
* Sin{Away} considered getting one of the 'Intel Inside' stickers and making it say Anthrax instead.... don't think the postal service would find it too amusing though

I need to go. You people are a drain on my bandwidth ;p

"Anytime a bunch of religious people want to get together and kill each other, I'm all for it." -George Carlin

Have any of you ever had nightmares about Communist Rabbits?

I want to learn Japanese but then I realized, if I just wait 10 years Japanese will just be english with a really bad accent and a few misplaced u's anyway

I'm not evil, I'm just good impaired

we should make one universal language ...tolkien elvish.

I've taken so many drugs the past week.. my unborn children in which I will have years from now will probably be affected by them ;)

<Kantizuni> or take an old flat top 386 case and stuff an atx mobo sideways into it..
<DJ^Krush> Yeah it'd pump them out for a little while before it overheated and the case melted down :P
<Kantizuni> DJ^Krush: Thats why you keep it in a freezer :P

"I can't really work out why I'm not a good doctor, after all I did almost pass medical school"

The news is like a soap opera where the writers need not create the stories, only speculate wildly about them. In many ways, reporters are like dedicated fans of our world, they discuss issues in ways that have little to no relevance. To draw a parallel to Trekkies, reporters argue over whether Captain Kirk or Captain Picard is a superior leader and what would happen if the Romulans invaded the Federation.

* WarezBert has porn on this computer... to do otherwise would cause serious hand atrophy

Sex has been proven to act as a mild pain killer in women

I classify whatever requires me to get off my chair and move at speeds faster than a slow walk, to be a sport

Today President George Bush met the Russian President Putin in the White House. Slightly startled, Bush asked "What are you doing here?"

Picasso came to London and got his watch stolen. Being an artist, the Police asked him to draw a sketch of his suspect. Based on his sketch the police, later that day, placed under arrest two senior sitizens, two old ladies, two buses and four washing machines

(Quit: "Show me God, for I believe... let your youth unchain me. And in your eyes, I am free. Your innocence reminds me..." - Addict, Youth)

hmmm i'm going thru the foxnews bios looking to decide who i want to stalk

"I wonder what would happen if I had a body to live in..." "And God sneezed..."

maybe the whole of the Universe and all life in it is the definition of God

<Bolognaus> how can you find a needle in a haystack, with no needle?
<SoulsBlaze> How can you find the haystack with filtered perception?

maybe b4 the Universe is the end of it

The fact that the Cheese stands alone has often been taken advantage of by its natural enemy, Mouse, since the beginning of time. Cheese might have gone extinct if it were not for the intervention of Man, who paired up Cheese with devices known as Mouse Traps, to form a quite effective symbiotic relationship. The Mouse, attracted by the Cheese, became easy prey to the Mouse Trap.

the four agreements...be impeccable with your word...never make assumptions...never take anything personally...and always do your best :))

jeeze, I just wish I wasnt a lazy procrastinating perfectionist. It's really quite annoying.

For the record, saying 'religion can be dangerous' is asinine and stupid. Anything can be dangerous. It's an unnecessary specific that seems to attribute an unfair amount of 'danger' to religion.

There's a difference between not having faith and not wanting others to have faith.

<o____o> People can be "a little anti-theist"
<^Kit^> um.. yeah, and a little pregnant.

I saw Jesus once, no joke. SOme guy was dressed as Jesus carrying a cross and everything downtown. Never found out if he was an actor or just a fanatic.

Everyone should have an 'attractiveness index' on a scale of 1 to 10... and anyone with a 7 or higher has to spend one day a week publicly naked

* Alcar knows who Tarzan's sons name is :p
<Alcar> Only bit of trivia I ever managed to use.
<Baliadoc> whoa, cool :)
<Baliadoc> i didn't even know he had a son. though it shouldn't be that surprising to me.
<Baliadoc> not like Jane was with him for the brains, if ya know what i mean

I think the quickest way to 'block' any ability is to think of yourself as psychic.

"I dislike blasphemy on purely rational grounds. If there is no God, blasphemy is stupid and unnecessary; if there is, then it's damned dangerous." - Flan O'Brien

<Alcar> The bible as a whole is a poem, to me. And a neat piece of fiction :)
<Tandaco> it's a wealth creation and subjugation tool :P

does that mean the whole family is omnipotent ? guess they dont need viagra then

You know what I think God is doing... (if indeed he exists)... he's like, putting red ants and black ants in a jar and he's watching them fight

probably burying dinosaurs heads (bill Hicks) "lets see if they believe in me now, my me I crack myself up"

God doesn't need to know what I keep under my bed

(Quit: Surrounded by chaos a dragon blooms in full, with the power of elements and the knowledge of ages, they are the destined rulers of the world second only to God.)

<halfhitler-halfjewish> he had syhilis
<yetifemme> Well! That explains a lot
<provis> figures
<yetifemme> Neitzsche had syphillis.
<provis> again figures
<yetifemme> So did Van Gogh.
<provis> also ...

* Renalis tends to view the whole concept of religious truth as a salad bar..

* Alcar isn't sure there is a difference between comercialisation and brutalisation :)
<Renalis> Alcar: true.. but at least commercialism is a little more polite about fucking you up the ass
<Renalis> at least, with commercialism.. the people in charge buy you dinner BEFORE they anally rape you
<Renalis> and then they send you flowers afterwards..

Go back to sleep. Your dream is going to start without you. You'll be lost if you miss the opening scene

its people who SAY things are wrong that make this life suck

Religion can be used to justify any attrocity precisely because of the "God told me to do it, God says it is just" mentality. Morals of peole are shunted asside to obedience to an iinterpretation of the will of a purported God. Its scary.

<Noah_Baudie> I still don't see why Kristin isn't hunting and killing "witches" whoul she is not to suffer to live
<Kristin_Hartnett> Noah_Baudie, what?
<Noah_Baudie> "Though shalt not suffer a witch to live",,, you havent read that far yet?
<Kristin_Hartnett> Noah_Baudie, there are different laws for different times.
<Noah_Baudie> Think about what you just said

* Forest` ponders how many times a gay witch would get killed...

Bin laden convinced some unquestioning islamics to interpret a Koran verse his way. They did so. They saw that the great satan was america and that it must be destroyed. They did not question, for Allah knows better and one shall not question the orders of Allah. Sept 11.

she believes in the Bible. She just reads it sensibly. She can see which parts are allegory, and which parts are outdated, and which parts are actually conducive to peace and harmony amonst human beings

<Forest`> Noah_Baudie i like the Tao - but it seems to assume a world for of people with IQ's on the right side of the bell curve
<Noah_Baudie> Forest, I could respond with "The bible assumes people with no minds of their own whatsoever", but that'd be cruell no? ;)

I understand that Christians think they are following the laws of the Bible as they should. But over time they realize that some are just plain wrong, i.e. slavery. Sooner or later they will realize that homosexuality is benign. It just can't come soon enough to save the hundreds of young gay people who will commit suicide this coming year because of the guilt foisted on them by churches following outdated laws.

i had to make a presidential campaign poster. it said "Vote for me. I'll give you $20.00"

<Showers`Without`Tears> *sighs* I'm out of cigarettes.. that means i have to send a pack back and say they were bad so they will give me a free carton.
<Showers`Without`Tears> Mmm... I usually leave half a pack. I'll open one side, and leave the other side sealed, and say in the letter something about how they tasted really "funny" and go into detail about that.
<Aleric`> "They made be cough and become socially unaccaptable in some restaurants, diminished my life expectancy and helped make me impotent."
<Aleric`> You get a letter back: "Yes, but did you have any complaints?"

<Sintaqx> dual 750 pIII procs, 4gb ram, and 10 16gb hds
<WarezBert> nice... whats it for?
<Sintaqx> $4500 paperweight

Even through the bad haircuts I still loved him.

<BornWinna> when jesus fed everyone one a few loaves and fishes i don't think that was a miracle, it was just bnouvelle cuisine
<rkid> if the fishes were whales it wouldnt have been very hard

<Jeramias> I've decided that I'm going to go to Korea. I'd need to learn some words though. Hello. Thank you. Hotel. Brothel. And such exciting phrases as: "Worship me, I'm American." and "I've killed for less. You're lucky that I like you."

a description of one of the books that showed up during my search.... Landing in Lake Superior, Rock kills a Plesiosaurus (a product of regressive evolution ). He battles man-eating plants, is captured by French-speaking, panther-keeping Amazons who force him to have gang sex with them.

<Nevaeh> I would go to hell for these things. I wonder if thats bad.
<^Kit^> you probably will ;) chocolate's too good to be saintly.

You mean you're not the head of Gumby when smooshed by a brick?

I don't care about anything other than EverQuest

in theory, if enough of the loveless ones all kill each other off, the majority of those left will be loving.

You know what I find amusing? Moses came down from mount Sianai the first time with a single tablet. The Israelites could not have followed the one law written on it. the second time he came down with 12 commandments. That still wasn't clear enough so the book of Leviticus had to be written, contining something on the order of 1300 laws.....

(Quit: Spreading the Atlas complex, one neurotic at a time.)

the one time i really want to talk to him, and i haven't seen him in days

Monkeys don't have opposable thumbs... Which is probably why we don't use them as slaves.

If I suddenly forget all everything I know, I will show a drastic change as well. For example, I will stop being a bitter cynical misanthrope.

someone give me some advice. My best friends girlfriend dumped him today. Should I go over there and "console" her through this troubled time and take advandage of her emotional state, or should i stay away for awhile?

(Quit: Still learning... how much I dont know....)

<polychronopolis> No no Ginkus i absolutely refuse to get drawn into a long, boring conversation that has no relevance and no point
<Alcar> polychronopolis - and you're on IRC?
<Alcar> Wow.
<Alcar> So, uh, what DO you do on it? :)

well, my diplomacy thing is backed up by history! Whenever two relatively large groups of people meet, they kill each other until they realize they'd be better off trading and whatnot and killing each other only intermittantly to buffer their economy

my favourite warcry has always been "hit the guy next to me! he started it!" its a family warcry

<ZarK^SpaceMonkey> at what point is the cost of Love too high?
<Alcar> Zark - the point where you die for it.

not everybody wants to live forever

when the cost of living becomes as high as the cost of living "righteously" it's just another ideal

* qwerty finds the idea of a channel full of people with $800 computers and $20/month ISP bills on $20/month phone lines discussing the merit of asceticism amusing :-)

erg =P english is so not a programming language :)

If trees were supposed to be people, then god would have made them idiots, too!

hm...why aren't I talking

(Quit: "One thing I have learned in a long life: that all our science, measured against reality, is primitive and childlike -- and yet it is the most precious thing we have." - Albert Einstein)

really ? i'd think being an atheist would make you appear normal

the is the culminary combining of every word in the entire english language, it is the absolute answer to everything, it is you, it is me, it is the universe, it is everyone and everything, and it won't stop, until it has unified the universe and caused it to blow itself up.

My imagionary friend thinks you have serious mental problems..

<Alcar> Nah I'm with jeramias that the children in the movie that had no relevance proved she was a hallucinating pedophile :)
<aslhk> I dunno if I go for that =P
<Alcar> what else explains them, then :p
<aslhk> bad script writers?
<Alcar> that's the easy way out. Besides, they had to be good.
<Alcar> You can't make a script that bad unless you're really good at writing bad scripts.
<Alcar> It explains a lot of literature, too.
<aslhk> that's very not true =P
<aslhk> how do you explain the D&D movie?
* Alcar doesn't. Some things defy explanation. :)

*** Quits: Nevaeh (Quit: Psychiatrists say that one in four people are mentally ill. Check three friends, If they're okay.. you're it. o.o)
<Max_K> What if none of them are ok ?
<michaelll> maybe its the psychiatrist :)
<Max_K> If all your friends are mentally ill, what does that say about you ?
<Alcar> Actually, if you don't think that any of your friends are mentally ill, I'd wonder if you have friends :)

Will osama and George ever go out and have a beer together?

If you want to talk about the books, don't bring the movies into it and vice versa. They are totally separate. The movie was meant to be seen as it was made. the book was also made that way for a reason. if you want to get the story from the book, read the book

<dragon> anyone know a buddist chat room
<qwerty_> dragon: #zen, but it's always empty ;-)
<qwerty_> dragon: no pun intended

(Quit: arguing on IRC is like running in the special olympics... even if you win, you're still retarded)

Yeah... I think the "bad" emotions tell us more about people than the good in that sense. They effect us more than the

happy poems, since they .. I dunno . .resonate with us better. Everyone has known pain, I doubt most people know the "Shall I compare thee to a summers day . .well, Augst 12th was nice, and only slightly cloudy" love stuff the most costly of all follies is to believe passionately in the palpably not true, but it seems to be the chief occupation of mankind.

is it possible to be a spiritual junkie, and go through withdrawl if you dont get enough?

Yes! It can be done! I'll use my Nerf vortex super grip to hunt pigmies in Australia!

(Quit: ...Meanwhile, villainous Martians conspire with a traitorous atomic scientist to blast earth out of its orbit and replace it with Mars! - Zombies of the Stratosphere, 1952)

It's a crazy world and we are the PERFECT residents of it

<Symbolist> yetifemme, god works in mysterious ways
<yetifemme> GOD WORKS? This is news to me

<XenoAngel> you cannot proove there is a god or that there isnt...Imo
<XenoAngel> one shouldnt have to prove that
<XenoAngel> thats like me saying I got a pack of smokes and you say prove it, there is no way, and there is no need for me to do so, Im smokeing them while we convers...

the fact that we exist does not prove that anything made us, only that we exist.

being ignorant of your own ignorance towards the fact that ignornace is ignorant of your ignornant existance. ....because you suck.

i open my eyes and mind wide - and see lots of gods - including your's. you look through a narrow telescope and tell me what you see is all there is.

question the answers

this world is starved for art

(Quit: I'm not a programmer, though I played one for five years at University)

We're destined to not believe in destiny.

<DJ^Krush> Bolognaus: if your born without hands, then it's pretty certain that you're not going to be a great musician :)
<Bolognaus> DJ: Yes. But what does that pertain to?
<DJ^Krush> Bolognaus: connect the dots yourself, it's fate in action
<Cmdr_data> ever seen someone play guitar with his feet ? or sing ; )

Beliefs are based on convenience, life on necessity, tolerance on personality (rapturous)

Motto: Linux is like a wigwam - no windows, no gates, apache inside!

Our monoply game in the end had a big scooby doo doll in the middle of it that caused earthquakes which knocked down our houses, so we had to pay Darth Vader money to repair them...

<Satori> zitterbe: so without brains..there is no consciousness? no mind? no awareness?
<zitterbe> Yep
<zitterbe> You try it
<zitterbe> Try religion with no brain
<Satori> religion is usually tried with no brains ;))

but i don't care enough about my theory to defend it

that's too complicated to be logical

I just read a pamphlet "How to attract women" Apparently chocolate on a hook.

my parents are programmers, thats why I know nothing about it

'He who hesitates is lost' is a nice way of putting it. More like: 'He who hesitates is absolutely screwed for the rest of eternity'

I have a recuring dream that I've driven my car into some fun park with a multicolored road made of picnic benches. I get out and some kids have taken over and make me run a gauntlet where they're trying to kill me. I feed a man eating croc to a canable and get out only to realize I've left my car behind and when I get out they tell me my cheque bounced whats really scary is the cheque scares me more then the croc did :)

slavory has been given a bad name by americans anyway. back then it was probably viewed as damn good job security :)

<Warner> we live in a society where its cheaper to buy a new tv then pay some one to fix it :)
<Tarrasque> and pizza can get to our door faster than the police. There are some good sides :)
<Warner> Tarrasque hehe if only the pizza boy was armed :)

humanity is flawed, and doomed to failure. the only way out is deus ex machina

finally, i have decided to sleep. until tommorrow, the small dead things of the world are safe

<Alcar> To be human is to categorize. That implies hierarchies and thus makes anarchy impossible over any long term.
* qwerty agrees with Alcar, but wishes he didn't ;-)

that's a classic argument in the objective vs. subjective thing... ``you're arguing against objectivity with an objective argument.'' Hogwash. The map is not the terrain. That's like somebody pointing at the moon, and somebody else starting at his/her finger

I believe that there is no morality, and anyone that disagrees is evil.

if you have met an atheist that says god doesn't exist then you haven't met an atheist

i'm sure that if you take the same logic you use, and apply it to a system with God, you will find out that I was right--there is no morality, and all moral people are evil.

oh yes, we wouldn't want to pick words, would we? Perhaps if we chose them wisely then things wouldn't sound like they'd been assembled from three or four cartons of fortune cookie sayings thrown throw a shredder.

I'd believe that stupidity is immoral if I didn't believe that morals were immoral

there is no *real* right or wrong but action and consequence

"law is the collective predjudice of society''

From a purely objective view, good and evil are caused by emotional resonances with different events. Strip good and evil of any emotional impact and they don't exist. Which is why I much prefer subjective over objective morality since I don't think objectivity allows for morals :)

it's nice to have your morals served on a platter, but they need to teach someone not to lump all the dishes together

College is turning out crappy because, A. I dont study 24/7 or B. I dont party 24/7 And there is no middle ground

I'm a low enough life form that if you cut me in two, you'll just end up with two of me

I would like to represent hate and closeminded ignorance... my only doubt is to whom

Spelling is easy in programming HAlf the time it looks like someone threw up on the keyboard anyway

We can just grab pics of clothed people, and paint over their clothes to make them look naked!

"Hello, 911? Yes, my wife and I were having sex, and well ... you see .. we heard stories about doing it on dryers and such fro added ..... uhm, fun and well, the washing machine was open and she got stuck on the spin cycle.."

(Quit: "From what may anyone be saved? Only from themselves! That is, their own individual hell; they dig it with their own desires." - Edgar Cayce)

(Quit: Pete ate me. He ate me. He must be really out of sorts. He's never done that before.)

someone who throws around 'retard' as much as you do is bound to be some sort of anal opening

the best way to get textbooks for cheap is to steal them :P

the ability to pretend like we understand abstract concepts is what kills so many trees.

now now...lets be respectful to the moral absolutionists

(Quit: Mercy is good for the soul... But sadistic, brutal murder gets you on T.V. !)

I find a good way to get attention from the opposite sex is to pick your nose in public

<Baliadoc> hey Alcar, ever see LotR?
<Alcar> The movie? Yeah.
* MechaBlue thinks he'll just wait for the book to come out

hey "off the record" most shrinks are mentally unstable, and by helping others, they help themselves feel normal.

he said the catholic church seriously screws up people so they can't enjoy sex - and the only catholics really getting it on are the priests who all go to gay bars, and the nuns who sneak into each other's rooms at night

my friend's catholic pickup line "you know we aren't allowed to use condoms"

I don't waste time on irc, i'm watching tv too!

I don't believe in a God who judges me for what I believe is true

people are stupid, and the number of people who believe something doesn't increase the likelyhood of it being true.

my religion is pracital becasue it keeps me off the streets

Hmm... still using AOL? That's got to affect the feeling of self-worth...

shh don't ask questions just bend over!

<Tonitrus> What makes something 'goth' though?
<yetifemme> Unhappiness and eyeliner :p

Onward, to the bed. and always remember "The idiot will hear a knocking door and complain about the noise, the normal man will answer it, the smart man will look through the peephole first, and the wise man won't hear anything because he's having sex"

Here is a quick guideline to being popular, 1. Reduce your vocab and create a syllable limit for the words you use 2. always keep abreast of the 'next big thing' 3. victimize the less popular people 4. do not exhibit any differentiating personality traits from your peers

"Love and hatred are the same thing. The first is agressive, the second agressive."

I believe in deevolution... but not evolution.

A guy was sending an e-mail to his wife, but missed by one letter, and it went to an old woman who's husband just died yesterday. She took one look at the email, screamed and died. When her family heard it they came in and saw the screen. The email said "Dearest Wife, Just got checked in. Everything prepared for your arrival tomorrow.. P.S. Sure is hot down here.

Recently general Norman Schwartzkoph was recently asked if he believed that the terrorists responsible for the attacks of 9-11 should be shown Mercy and Forgivness. To this he Replied: "Mercy and Forgiveness are God's Job. Our job is to arrange the meeting."

My life will only begin when the kids move out and the dog dies.

So, my girlfriend called me a pedophile the other day. Man, i didn't know 9 year olds could spell words that big. the past tense of taoist is toast

(Quit: He who dares not offend cannot be honest. -- Thomas Paine)

"The truth is what people can be conditioned to believe"

"It's easy. All you have to do is tell the people they are being attacked, and denounce the peacemakers for lack of patriotism and exposing the country to danger." - Herman Goering

Isn't it odd how cereals have creation stories?

"The closest thing you've ever had to a sexual experiance was when your finger slipped in the toilet papper!"

Well, the dead aren't right or wrong, just decomposing.

Hell, when I was in law school there was a guy in my class who was doing a joint, M.D./J.D. can you imagine? maybe he was going to do his own malpractice stuff.

(Quit: The key to your problems: the world IS against you.)

Though it would be cool to see what they're doing with the new technology. The computer conventions show new stuff, but the porn industry is the first that actually gets around to using it. without porn, we'd still be using cave paintings

" .. the error of supposing that, because everything indeed is not right with the world, everything must accordingly be wrong with the world; the error of supposing that, because we are plainly not a race of angels, we must perforce be a race of beasts." (James Gardiner)

<Baliadoc> and i hardly get to be online anymore. damned new computer.
<Jeramias> Fix it then. We miss you ;)
<Baliadoc> no, the problem is it works too well. can't get my brother out of my room :)
* Baliadoc can't really blame him. It's fun to play these fancy new age games (do it myself). It's just the whole "In my bedroom 'til 10" that miffs me.
<Jeramias> Engage in self-bondage and see if it scares him out
<Baliadoc> Jer, that would scare me out.

if god was on ebay, how much would he be worth?

(Quit: I wanna slit your throat and fuck the wound. I wanna push my face in and feel the swoon. I wanna dig inside, find a little bit of me. Cus the lines get blurry when you don't come clean.)

I have a monkey in my pants. The monkey is me. The pants, on the other hand... I don't know where they came from.

<Kattelyn> Taurus (April 20 - May 20) You will discover that by simply wearing a large amulet made of bones and feathers, and by carrying a blowgun, you can usually get a seat on public transportation, no matter how crowded it gets.
<LaFemmmeNikita> u can do the same by not showering for a week

Your daily horoscope: You will never find true happiness - What you gonna do, cry about it? The stars predict tomorrow you'll wake up, do a bunch of stuff, and then go back to sleep

Libra: a big promotion is just around the corner for someone much more talented than you. Laughter is the very best medicine, remember that when your appendix bursts next week.

"But he was hit by an ice cream truck!" "He was standing up for truth, justice, and the American way." "He's not even american!" "That's what makes it so compelling!"

<MistaCuzCuz> And my last three girlfriends all have names beginning with an M, now what does that tell ya?
<qwerty> MistaCuzCuz: that you're working your way through the phone book?

I haven't felt this bored since I learned to read.

one might define absolute truth as the amount of truth required to perform the "right action" in aany moment

<DJ^Krush> But wouldn't it be boring having all the answers?
* Alcar would rather have all the questions
<Alcar> But I'm afraid they just boil down to: "why?" And that the answer is: "Why not?"

The naive logic of good is no match for the irrational genius of evil

Accepting that the world is an insane place is much less hard on the lining of your stomach than expecting people to do what they say they will do, or are doing.

Has anyone ever seen a monkey wearing clothing and been offended?

That which does not kill me postpones the inevitable

(Quit: If it ain't broke, don't fix it. At least go to the trouble of breaking it first.)

(Quit: I started coming to irc to possibly find true friendship and love; but that never happened, instead I think I love hating you ppl..)

If PI is infinite, how can God use it? Or is God just too lazy to track it down and make it finite?

Gods are what you make of them, like tables, chairs, and silverware.

(Quit: If You Meet The Buddha In A Random Encounter, Kill Him!)

stereotypes are only invalid/unethical when they involve preconceptions of what a person things/feels/believes/does/chooses/values

I got kicked out of some sex channel for answering the question 'Are you male or female?' with 'Which would you prefer?' it made me sad.

I might argue the point if I had reason to respect your opinions

Antique religion for sale. Comes with a complete set of gods and set of scheduled sacrifices. Inquisition withi--I mean, inquire within.

The triumph of good over evil is often the triumph of ignorance and attitude over intelligence and education

<Tandaco> there's a textfile called mind_control_techniques.txt
<Alcar> mind control technique #1: Get someone to read this document and believe mnind control is possible...

I'm not gay! I just don't like girls!

besides, saying your religion is the only right one for lal people in all situations at all times isn't possible. People are too complex and the human experience too diverse for any one system of beliefs to answer everyone's needs all the time

<Saroc> I forgot how many ppl need lives besides me
<aslhk> I had one, and it was fun, but you know, it inferferes with the important stuff!

it would be much more convenient if you could just rent a life for a few hours at a time

* Alcar is cynical tho.
<aslhk> you, alcar!?
<aslhk> no way!
<Alcar> Oh, ok.. Realist, then :)
<|337C4Bb4g3> Alcar: Does there exist such a thing?
<Alcar> |337C4Bb4g3 - Yeah, it's where the pessimist beats the snot out of the optimist :)

<Caltak> sometimes i tink we need a good Nuclear Winter.
<Keith`> err there is even
* Alcar looks at Caltak. Know the feeling. In grade 8, I told my mother the human race would be much better off if we all jumped into the water like lemmings....
<Alcar> She was a tad disturbed
<Alcar> In retrospect, it wouldn't be fair to the fish...
<Caltak> Alcar: we'd fight over the best cliffs to jump from :)
<Alcar> The NEW holy war - over the Golden Gate Bridge.

* Caltak likes the Fallout setting. Hey, people are still assholes, but there are a lot less of them :)

I cannot state my artistic talent in a light negative enough to do it justice.

i have to figure out some way to make myself get up in the morning. maybe if a drink a lot of water before i go to bed ;b

Repaint! Repaint! And Thin No More!

I think people's need to do things comes more from believing that death is what makes life important than from that actually being the case

<Gedit> how do cows look into headlights?
<yetifemme> *blink* *chew cud* *blink*
<Gedit> that's good .. got a mental picture from that ;)

* Tonitrus declares Leonard Nimoy the antiChrist.

some people grind up dried human bone marrow and snort it. it's the strongest psychedelic known to man

I believe that abortions should be allowed at any time. Up to 17 years after birth.

<Nevaeh> you know you're tired when you read "Reaction" as "erection"... *tsks*
<militant> Nevaeh you just need a boyfriend

there's a hadith from Jesus where he says 'accept the truth even if its from those who aren't truthful and discard lies even if its from the truthful'

You essentially murdered english grammer in cold blood in public with an ice-pick.

i'm struggling to renounce the world and become a wandering monk in the himalayas..but my dad wont let me go.

Hell is where all the interesting people go.

I am skeptical of many things, but many people mistake skepticism for disbelief in the intangible. If you ask me, science should be open to everything until it can prove or disprove it conclusively. I don't like trends in science that blindly dismiss phenomenon that it can't explain

science is simply a set of methods and techniques used to derive tentative explanations concerning emperical phenomenon

do not mistake your ignorance as a fault on our part

"All extremists should be taken out into the street and shot"

I've noticed that books change over time even when they don't. Dune, for instance, is a book I've read about six times. It's been a different book almost each time

(Quit: there are doorways i have yet to open . . . windows i have yet to look through . . . perhaps moving forward is not the answer . . . maybe i should go back . . .)

<Alcar> besides, people are going to hate, so telling them not to isn't usful, nor practical
<qwerty> Alcar: it's practical if you can make collections money from it

how can people deny what they can clearly see, and yet profess what is so surrounded in mystery?

HAHA...you know the big fire beast that killed gandalf?....wouldnt of it been cool if he said "Gandalf, I am your father!" in one of those dark vader voices...:)

just because people go to the zoo to point at the monkeys doesn't mean that defines the entirety of their lives

"damn it jim i'm a doctor not a woman"

The bells of revenge shall toll on the day when the revenge I now vow to get will have been gotten. Or is that has been gotten? Oh it doesnt matter, as the grammar pixies rarely ever wage a substantial attack on me, I always manage to hold them off easily.

I admit that reason is a small and feeble flame, a flickering torch by stumblers carried in the star-less night, -- blown and flared by passion's storm,-- and yet, it is the only light. Extinguish that, and nought remains.

No discordian would admit to being a discordian!

Faith is to the human what sand is to the ostrich.

Martyrs have been sincere. And so have tyrants. Wise men have been sincere. And so have fools.

If there is a Hell with fire and brimstone, one must conclude that it was constructed solely for the special delectation of God, that he enjoys watching human beings (or is it their souls?) fry.

<ohhhhhhhm> You can't know anything for sure, Alcar.
<o____o> ohhhm, you know that for sure?

<ZarK^Horus> maybe that's why they are "disabled"... to learn why they are here...
<DJ^Krush> I'd be interested to hear that answer
<DJ^Krush> "Oh yeah, God thought it would be funny to see me try and play soccer with one leg"
<ZarK^Horus> is the one who plays soccer with one leg, laughing?
<DJ^Krush> ZarK^Horus: I certainly wouldn't be
<o____o> Soccer with one leg? I'd be laughing my ass off. Thats some kind of athelete to be able to pull that off.

Right when you think the red button is as obvious as can be...they hire somebody colorblind...

<Alcar> "We're only after you're leaders, but we'll bomb everyone else, too, so that you all hate us and become anti-US in 10 years time, and we'll be all annoyed because we liberated you!"
<|337C4Bb4g3> Alcar: Hey, it worked with Iran and Iraq, didn't it?
<|337C4Bb4g3> oh... wait...
<|337C4Bb4g3> nm
<|337C4Bb4g3> i think the US just does it so we can have a constant stream of wussy enemies to beat on

* aslhk pictures the United States declaring war on war next
<aslhk> "Well, we can't kill it if it's not there... so the first thing we need to do is start a war!"

what I find sad is the US has been fighting a war against drugs for a long time, and yet, we have only managed to kill people despite the fact that the drugs have no weapons, and aren't even animate, THEY ARE BEATING US

<|337C4Bb4g3> i need to go to a school where I can actually talk to people intelligently ;b
<qwerty> |337C4Bb4g3: they don't exist

hes threatening to kill me if i don't become Christian

<exoticbabe_> like i said about christiniaty and also buddism and hinduism dont have valid foundations
<Munin> exoticbabe_: demonstrate how a one subjective belief system is superior to another
<Munin> come on
<Munin> this should be great

Cure for pacifism : Find someone who's preachign pacifism. 2. Start debate. 3. Ask why the use of force is wrong. 4. Wait till he starts saying about circle of violence. 5. Punch him as hard as you can. 6. When he gets back up to hit you, say that it would be a violation of his principles to strike you. 7. Wait till he agrees. 8. Repeat from step 5.

* qwerty and his German Shepherd feel the same way. Following the ``road less taken'' has been wonderful for our relationship

<Tonitrus> I don't see why people complain about the flood.
<Tonitrus> If it would have been me, I would have said "Screw this, it isn't working" and uncreated the universe from the bottom up.

we need more hypercritical people to counter the hypocritical ones

"How can we claim to know a thing, without having first seen it from all sides?"

(Quit: "Do not obatin your slaves from Britain, because they are so stupid and so utterly incapable of being taught." - Cicero 106-43 B.C.) I've decided that I would be the only intelligent creature in the universe, if I wasn't such a dumbass.

I wish Jesus advocated the formation of Christian hit squads to sort out people like that

He doesn't have all the answers, he IS the ONLY answer! :P

Then Leonard Nimoy appeared to me in a vision! And showed me the One True Answer(pat. pending)

There's nothing wrong w/ organised religion that isn't also wrong with disorganised religion

they found the missing page to the bible. Page 1 "Any resemblance to any persons, living or dead, is completely coincidental..."

the study of the fact that some things seem to be in quantifiable relationships is nothing more than the study of the fact that some things seem to be in quantifiable relationships =P

Opportunity better knock, or I'm going to track her down, and go to her house, and when she's sitting there eating breakfast, I'm going to pop in and say, "Suprise!"

<|Judy|> Do you think maybe it's better that Steve's gone right now so he can't see how fat and ugly I'm getting?
<PeterPiper`> |Judy|: it depends on how convincingly he lies

<Kenshiro-NS> It's porn, it's not supposed to be thought provoking
<Alcar> Kenshiro-NS - Depends on what body parts one thinks with :)

You know your morning breath is bad when beer tastes like Kool-Aid

<aslhk> for example: birds require feathers, rocks do not have feathers, therefore rocks are not birds
<aslhk> that's logically valid
<Jeramias> you got lucky on that one

if you use sound logic, then you're fine. if you valid logic, then you should be shot.

I am a reactionary libertarian existentialist Christian fundamentalist. I just put 'reactionary libertarian' on because it sounds cool though. It isn't part of my religion ;)

I worship God because He's done immeasurable amounts of beautiful movement in my life and I owe him more than I could possibly give him in an entire lifetime. personally It's a kind of "thanks"

Science only goes so far. What lies beyond it, God tends to fill that void.

I need a new hobby. Stalking is getting old.

it's not real beef. it's cow parts (lips and assholes, people) and even some newspaper, all mushed up with flavor chemicals, frozen in a bad, and cooked from a near frozen state into a loaf which is then thinly sliced. The horsey sauce is chemically cultivated to compliment the chemicals in the beef.

* qwerty is always slightly amused about the controversy over what's between the legs of the most perfect entity in existence :-)

Eating Camels: Part of OUR American heritage

atheist missionaries are the worst.

atheist evangelists are just pathetic

I wonder if it is Thou Shalt Not Kill Unless Someone Is a Pagan, Heathen, Irritating Or Just Plain Annoying shortened for the tablet?

You can not define god you can only know it through personal experience...that god is within you and you ARE already god. You are Already god..just as the rays of the sun are really the SUN.

I am often depressed by the state of propaganda in the united states today

science isn't any more fundamentally true than religion. all logical conclusions must be based on at least one unproven premise

Logically, it's the women who should have multiple husbands. Women are multi-orgasmic. Men are not. Therefore, it is more logical for a woman to have two husbands than a man to have two wives.

It's amazing what 5 pounds of silicone and 10 of padding can do for an actresses career

if your mother-in-law and a lawyer were drowning, would you see a movie or go out to lunch?

CANADA : Buffer country to protect us from invasion by the artic penguin army.

But I think religion implies the trappings of dogma, and I think we'd notice our dogs were wearing frocks

happiness can be, and most often is false

'we may lose and we may win, but we will never be here again'

We believe in freedom, sport, family life, good will, the joy of giving, freedom of choice, and the complete obliteration of all other lifeforms

<Maxicola> Wait...Hemmingway was depressed then...
<aslhk> he killed himself when he determined he couldn't write anymore, reputedly =P
<Maxicola> i forgot what was wrong with him
<qwerty> Maxicola: nothing a bullet to the head didn't cure ;-)
<DJ^Krush> aslhk: if I wrote like that, I'd be compelled to do the same j/k ;)

<aslhk> when he gets to parts that actually have action or whatnot, the sentences suddenly become short, which makes the terrain descriptions seem even longer =P
<Maxicola> well...it makes sense that action descriptions should be short, it highlights actions itself and makes events seem to go faster
<Alcar> "Amid the rolling hills, the vistas, the broad expanse of land stretching as far as the eye can see, further than I wanted to see as I watched the land stretnch onward. I ate lunch. It was good. The world was serene around me, the birds were singing little ditites and the roses smelled almost like roses, but not quite as good, as I sat abnd looked around."
<Alcar> like that?
<aslhk> except more descriptions :)
<DJ^Krush> 'i ate lunch. it was good' that captures hemingway's style quite effectively I think :)

<}priestess{> what is the difference between salvation and being born again ?
<Gedit> $5
* }priestess{ stares at Gedit
<qwerty> }priestess{: I think ``born again'' happens in this life, and ``salvation'' happens in the next one. But then, you do have Christians running around asking ``are you saved?''
<Gedit> qwerty the people talking about being saved are referring to their word documents

<Ann> This is very helpful. I've heard people talk about "talk to God", "God will answer". But nothing has happened for me, so I'm on a "mission" to find out more.
<Kristin_Hartnett> Ann, you might try fasting
<Greg``> How'd fasting help? 'Help, God, I'm starving! Give me food!'?

<Tonitrus> Ann, It's rather simple. When you die, your soul doesn't. Jesus' soul was God.
<Greg`> Tonitrus - wow. That's the best explanation I've ever heard for the Jesus was man but god thing.
<Tonitrus> Greg`, You expected less of me?

for every truth there is a lie. what you really mean to say is 'the absolute' which exists at the level of comprehension at which there is no dualism between truth/false. everything IS.

(Quit: What my cardboard sign would say: "Will RP For Food.")

the local English pub is named "Hair of the Dog''

i wonder how many in this channel will ever amount to anything? O.o

I used to be Catholic. I know all about guilt.

You get $7 when you win the Darwin Award

The thing that sucks about God is that there's nothing you can bribe Him with. What doesn't He have already? :/

Cats were once worshipped as gods. They never forgot.

Is it so cold you have to light a match under your balls to thaw the sperm?

Someday, I may actually have sex, or some reasonable facsimile, and at that point I might like to know where I stand in the afterlife.

So I'm going to hell anyway, so I should go out and have sex a lot? Is that what you are telling me? That sounds like good advice!

We can only handle so many lies at once. Humans are the broken creation of a God who doesn't know how to let us know lots of lies ;)

<^Kit^> Kristin_Hartnett, I just got married Saturday.
<^Kit^> miraculously, no divorce yet ;)
* ^Kit^ checks her watch
<^Kit^> ask me again on friday!

If God can love an insignificant little prick like yourself, you can too!

who the fuck are you to say my beliefs are wrong?

whats better, average or ugly? think about it, if you're really ugly then you're "that ugly girl" at least you have an identity

<|Judy|> qwerty: You wouldn't feel so brilliant if you had to teach me this stuff. I'm a retard when it comes to computers.
<qwerty> |Judy|: nah, I could teach you... you're smart enough
<qwerty> |Judy|: and if you pay me, you're motivated enough

I love myself everyday.... hows that for a quote!

"After this, I am going to disneyland! So I can have some coke, the official drink of mars the red planet" That's what I think the mars landing would be :) sponsorship is fun :)

It's pretty sad that the cast of Scooby Doo are some of my most important role models.

Curiosity drives man, economics nations :p

i don't find that connection meaningful because the speed of light as a number depends on our completely arbitrary unit of time: the second.. and the completely arbitrary unit of distance: the mile

so you would rather be a machine then a living breathing being. we im sure when the terrorist come to your country and start blowing up your buildings you will be out in the streets with the dead and dying wearing a sign that reads. "lets take a moment to analyse all the data befor we do anything"

The sea changes color but the sea does not change

I just think that there are worse things than being a computer geek.

think I'm gonna grow somethin on my face, I'm thinkin about potatoes

the day mary kay sells beard fertilizer is the day I bite a shotgun barrel

<Motivo> I'm old enough to know I'll do more damage in this life than my good intentions will ever be able to make up for

<Mindal> lol...what topic of wholesome goodness shall we twist and pervert instead?
<Mindal> I mean...discuss civilly.
<Motivo> tax reform!
<Mindal> Motivo: Why reform them? I vote for tax dismemberment.

the government is made up of people who take credit while others work. I never saw a politician pave a road or teach a child.

<yetifemme> Apparently Buddhists, while not allowed to hate people, are willing to compromise
<Amandis> Therefore, all Buddhists are Canadians

The God d'd Olymplics are 10 mins of crap and 2 mins of athletics

<Sasqutch> Everybody will kill anybody for their dumb-ass god
<DJ^Krush> Sasqutch: wow that's right on the money! have you got any other well constructed, bulletproof, anti-theological arguments?

History says we're in the End Times. Prophecy says that the Beginning Time is about to occur.

<Avatara> "The ancient esoteric knowledge of our venerably exaulted tradition was passed down generation to generation -- each elder giving the mantle to the most talented child in an unbroken line since 8000 B.C. We have survived. We will survive. We always have been, are, and will be, amoung you. Only now are we coming forth to share our teachings."
<Amandis> Avatara - What's that from?
<Avatara> (ignore the fact that the founder who was born in the early 1900s is standing behind the curtain like the Wizard in the Wizard of Oz)
<Avatara> I just made it up on the spot, Amandis -- it's the basic kind of tale that is most often told.
<AsokasSword> Avatara it sounded like dribble from the books of Eckencar, after 300 pages of self proclaimation of holy melodic memic impetus the commandmanet of though shalt use a major credit card to join is given, the "religion" is popular in college towns known for mind numbing amounts of substance abuse

are all religions memic, self replicating, or claim corner on truth regardless of subjective examination?

yeah the thing about is havin sex with a 3 year old monkey "child molestaation, or do you look at it in monkey years (so the monkey is a adult) and its just weird)

God worships me. We're both omnipotent and omniscient, but I have more style :-P

I am enlighted, I mean... there's a big lamp on top of my head... is that what you mean?

<|337C4Bb4g3> AsokasSword: You don't need to accept the validity of 'enlightened ones' to learn from them!
<AsokasSword> True but what if they want me to take drugs, have sex, and get them tax exempt status then can I question their claims
<|337C4Bb4g3> AsokasSword: That sounds like a good religion to me!
<|337C4Bb4g3> Where can I sign up?

read it sylabble for sylabble then shoot up some paint it all makes sense

you have consistently bested me at logic and reason so I was just curious to now what sex to make the voodoo doll

I read an article the other day, the argument was that to "state you're a solipsist" is a contradiction... because by the mere use of language, a social construct, you're assuming other minds.

<metaphysx> shaddee... go in and claim to be a solipsist and explain to the rest of the class why they don't exist.
<Alcar> metaphysx - and then try to explain why you wrote the essay? :p
<Alcar> and why you want a good mark?

<aslhk> but let us say that both of these theories are true
<aslhk> for the sake of the argument
<aslhk> you're given a few options in this case: 1)do some fancy footwork to make these things fit with the christian mythos
<aslhk> the next option: 2)view things which conflict with 'proven science' as parables from which one can learn with no necessary basis in fact
<aslhk> 3)disregard the Christian mythos as untrue and find a new one
<aslhk> 4)disregard the Christian mythos as untrue and start a new one
<aslhk> 5)become agnostic
<aslhk> 6)become an atheist (new mythos, perhaps?)
<aslhk> 7)disregard science
<Avatara> 8) enjoy the Christan mythos as a mythos
<Tonitrus> 8) shoot aslhk for being tedious.

<Pt-Paladin> Though I still have the "desire" for a god-being.
<|337C4Bb4g3> Pt-Paladin: Become discordian!
<|337C4Bb4g3> Hail Eris!
<Pt-Paladin> Someone to help you carry your burdens so to speak.
<|337C4Bb4g3> oh
<|337C4Bb4g3> not Eris then

* yetifemme sings "I Saw "Bob" kissing Eris" to the tune of "I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus"

The idea that religion was used to explain the mysterious before science could is a tale told by some scientists to make their system seem as if it is the more advanced model.

<Thaddeus_Metathran> this isnt a PrC, it a char class in my new campign im creating
<FnordBear> A classic concept. Did you do anything orrigional?
<Thaddeus_Metathran> if you look, you may see
<Alcar[htmling]> Something doesn't have to be original to be new.
* Alcar[htmling] grins

<aslhk> actually, I think I still am a mormon, officially
<aslhk> just a hell-bound one
<yetifemme> I thought you said you went to a Catholic school
<aslhk> I did!
<aslhk> I was mormon in catholic school~
<yetifemme> Ooh, so you're going to a couple different hells

The thought of you removing your clothes shrivels every conceivable sexual organ I have. Including my skin and brain.

anyways. girls that describe themselves as strange and intelligent are smart and conniving enough to know that the guys that go for the looks are probably all taken, and left are the nerds who play dnd and like brainy chicks.

<Anansy> but i've got enough guy friends who've had bad experiences with girls to become a woman-hater:)
<ArthurQ> Anansy: my fiance left me to live with her gay exboyfriend and his husband. I bet they cant beet that.
<Anansy> ArthurQ: shit, i bet they can't. this is something right out of jerry springer
<ArthurQ> Anansy: i know but its true.

my resume is actually pretty sweet considering i haven't done anything ;b

<|Judy|> I'm female and I'm pregnant. What else did you expect?
<aslhk> |Judy|: hmm. I cannot seem to come up with a witty retort to that =P

I don't know. The more I read, the less I think of people sometimes.

English doesn't effectively support grammar

English is a language that is so not regular, it's actually constipated

A great introduction to the many joys of the Kama Sutra®, the sampler slips discreetly into a purse, pocket or overnight bag. Contains delicate portions of the Original Oil of Love, Pleasure Balm, Wild Clove, and Mint Tree Bathing Gels, and Honey Dust with a handmade feather applicator.

I have a neat-o religion. Cows are sacred. Why? Cuz they're yummy. hee hee.....

* Eltanan has a nice theory, it's pretty simple, and easy to understand. "Everything is wrong". Therefore, all discussion is opinion, all 'evidence' is hearsay and irrelevant, and everyone who goes around trying to convince others of what they think is true is therefore a foolish waste of attention.

There are limits on my desire to know everything, apparently.

* Eltanan usually deals with the carebear stare the same way perseus dealt with the medusa. With a mirror.

* Eltanan wonders if anyone else has ever read a manga entitled 'Bondage Fairies'...

I have been unable to find lesbian elf porn

<ArthurQ> Considering in highschool people actually tried to kill me i shouldnt be so stright forward with my identity
<Setesh> ArthurQ: i pity them, actually.
<[Tina]> why did people try to kill you in high school?
<Setesh> [Tina]: look how he behaves on here.
<Setesh> [Tina]: imagine having to go to school with that.

Human porn is BORING!

<Kantizuni> I still need a pic of you!
<Kristin_Hartnett> whycome, Kantizuni?
<Kantizuni> Kristin_Hartnett: Because... erm... because you shine like a becon of my heart. I must have a pic of you to look and in your stead.
<Kristin_Hartnett> You'll probably put my head on a naked body and post it all over the internet
<Kantizuni> OR... you could just not wear clothes... that would save me thr trouble. =)

<Kristin_Hartnett> I had this friend since like 6th grade, and she just called me, and we talked for like 2 hours. But I haven't talked to this girl for like 2 years. So I'm a bit paranoid about it. I don't trust her as far as I can throw her.
<socrates^> Kristin_Hartnett, girls are weird. They talk for 2 hours and say 'I dont trust her'. I can't talk more than 2 mins in a phone call.

If someone wants to talk to -me- they can dial into mIRC =)

If someone wants to talk to me, they should conclude their main message within a sentence (max 10 words). I lose attention after that.

OF course, women are very myterious beings anyway. For example, why does it take my wife an hour and a half to 'get ready' in the morning? it takes me 3 minutes.

<Eltanan> seriously. Even if she's only going to the ATM, not even going to get out of the car or see anyone, she STILL stops to put on makeup and fix her hair. WHY?!?!?!?
<DooMoo> There are cameras on ATM's Eltanan.

<socrates^> How many gods/deities/demigods/semigods/pseudogods do we have in this channel?
* Eltanan used to be a Deity, but he accidentally ate all his followers.

acknowledging authority is an act of freedom not of slavery

Its all debatable when your sex is inflatable.

I love my kids, and every once in a while, I'm very happy that babysitters exist.

<o____o> Hmm I think I understand. Waxing is painful and it shows how much they love their men, cuz they are willing to endure the pain to look good for their men, not knowing the whole time that their men really don't care
<o____o> Sort of like men and how they hold their arms over their women at movies for 2 hours while all the blood leaves them.

* Eltanan thinks it's probably a good thing he can't talk to the dead, as he'd most likely end up inadvertantly starting an interdimensional war.

If I was a dead person, I would not want to talk to some whacked-out new-age chakra-molesting bastard like most people who claim to have talked to dead people are

When I was 6, my babysitter molested my chakra

you have to train yourself to stop acting like you have a body

it's not my job to rehabilitate the dead, i'm just a bystander

Haunting would be neat... you get revenge in the worst way. In order to get rid of you, the person you're haunting has to do you a favor.

I think the rules on alphanumerics are about as tight as those of ebonics

<Billy`Jean> i think you like having the kitty.. and i think i just made another quote..

at least let me die with my anal virginity intact. =/

There are other orifices in which we can electrocute.

I don't like killing people, I think it would be much more fun to drive them to self-destruction.

He's a goofball on the rocks with a hint of lemon.

"Sorry for the prostitution conviction. Will you be my valentine tonight? I brought condoms and money this time, and promise not to arrest you again." - Love Officer Wilkins

IRC has fewer commitments than most marriages ;P

Heck, in some non-american countries, it's COMMON for men to have a mistress. When the prime minister of france died, his wife sat next to his mistress at the funeral. If that happened in america, you'd need two caskets.

irc is a legitimate social life

It's a sad, sad day when your IRC death overmatches your IRL death :)

Oft times discussing your problems with your spouse allows them to share theirs with you, and enchances the physical and chemical bond

Screw that then, I'm going to follow the Antichrist, because I figure if 'sloth' is a sin in Christianity then 'working' must be a sin in Satanism

if you assume an objective moral framework, then naturally, that means that it applies to everyone and that is precisely what the christian church attempted to do. Apply thier underdstanding of right and wrong to everyone.I find no valid basis for that

Do you think a God so marvellous as the one in which you believe would have limited himself to things which your mind can grasp?

<christy> There is more to the world than what you see, Dallan. Do you think a God so marvellous as the one in which you believe would have limited himself to things which your mind can grasp?
<Alcar> christy - If He was a nice God, He would have!
<christy> Alcar: He throws frigging fireballs at people! I think we have learned he is not a nice God!
<Alcar> Everyone has bad days.

I find little basis for invalidating a subjective belief system using another subjective belief system

people who think they know it all are really annoying to those of us who truly do

a BA in philosophy and religion will just give you a lot to think about while you work the fry machine

I wish work really was a sin or somehting

The grass is always greener over the septic tank

one of the definitions of love that mean a lot to me is "love is not self-conscious"

<Omni^> Well you basically talk about.....How to get the company running better...is it?
<aslhk> Omni^: nope, that's business again :)
<aslhk> you kind of mention subjects which talk about getting the company running better
<aslhk> but mostly you learn how to pretend like you're doing something when you're not
<Omni^> so what the heck is management?
<aslhk> Omni^: "The art of getting work done through other people"
<RFB> Management--> overpaid people who do nothing, but claim the credit for the efforts of those who do.

<|337C4Bb4g3> you have to be willing to help perpetuate the sort of a culture that causes young women to literally starve themselves to death because they feel to bad about their bodies
<|337C4Bb4g3> you have to be basically about the most worthless and despicable piece of human refuse ever to crawl forth from the shallow end of the gene pool
<|337C4Bb4g3> which is why I will not go into marketing =)

<MechaBlue> Dentists say flossing is good
<MechaBlue> Flossing causes bleeding gums
<MechaBlue> Dentists like stabbing people in the mouth with needles and drilling holes in their teeth only to fill them with brain damaging chemicals
<MechaBlue> This leads me to believe that dentists are sadistic bastards who like to cause pain and misery
<MechaBlue> Much like Republicans

coke is so big now it's only real world-wide competitor is water

I dont make anyone as a valentine. I am beyond male and female....all things originate from me. Therefore I am in everyone of you and thus you are my parts. No better words to explain this.

relationships have a lot of paperwork now, love has a pricetag

I am against reproduction

Little kids are evil. You will know this with absolute certainty if you are ever in Denny's at 7am with a hangover and there is a table full of them screeching nearby.

<Vasudev> souls need body to incarnate
<Vasudev> therefore.. i can not say that birth is evil.
<aslhk> Vasudev: so let them be butterflies and screw with the weather =P

But reproduction is necessary to the survival of the speices. I propose we use genetic engineering to make vampires, so that we have predators to keep our population down.

<Chaos`^> 1800flowers.com
* Chaos`^ wonders if you dial .com too...?

a wise man once said " Grass and beer you're in the clear... Beer and grass you're on your ass"

sanity is not a property of the mind it is a judgement made by other minds and in terms of functionality, one of the prime determinants of sanity, the belief that one is powerless to control one's own thoughts and feelings is quite insane ;b

sanity is not a prerequisite to life :)

reality is a representational model in your mind

<o____o> Bus driver was taking medication that knocked him cold. His foot pressed down on the gas, and they went through a bus shelter, speeding up, hit two retaining walls, went into a park, through it, and up a hill, launched OFF A CLIFF and was about 15 feet airborn and landed in a swimming pool, nearly landing on some poor swimmer
<o____o> The swimmer was sueing for negligent infliction of nervous shock
<o____o > And the real funny thing was that there were passengers in the bus
<o____o> And the cops first thing he said to them was "What a ride! You can't buy this at canada's wonderland" it was on the record
<o____o> Only person injured was the driver, who they extracted from the bus and they found a huge blue area on his leg, they thought he was hurt and the blood wasn't getting there. Turned out this was the condition that had him taking the meds that caused all this
<o____o> What they don't say, and I want to know, is if he kept his job
<|337C4Bb4g3> any guy who can drive a bus off a cliff and keep anyone from getting hurt while sleeping DESERVES to keep his job ;b

<o____o> Somebody should put together a case law book on really screwed up cases like that one
<o____o> Some of the more famous ones wouldn't shock any lawyers but may suprise the public
<o____o> For example anybody here know the origin of the negligence action going beyong the enumerated common law categories?
<o____o> It was due to a decomposed snail that some lady drank. And she sued for negligent bottling.
<o____o> And every canadian lawyer knows that case inside out. Its THE case for negligence

You'll want to get a car and a family maybe (the most expensive thing you could ever buy)

Y'see in the US yer so sexist you'd never let a woman be president. In Canada... well. we let them fill in in the summers lol

* flamel has met people in psych wards...
<o____o> You date them?
<flamel> yeah, a few times... very crazy relationships.
<o____o> You picked up dates in the psych ward? lol
* AlcarDM checks the charts for nymphomaniac... :p
<AlcarDM> "Why DO they want to cure this?"

i've 'known' you for so long , yet i don't know u at all

<TrAmBieNCe> you cannot make that judement
<Tonitrus> I just did.

Look, we can't have a proper argument if you're going to be all rational about it.

<Ryft> You're at some friend's house, and you're sitting on the computer?
<Kantizuni> Yesh
<Ryft> Shoot, when I visit friends, I... uh... VISIT friends
<Kantizuni> Ryft: He's not here.
<Ryft> B&E... cool.

(Quit: If I try im half way to triumph, If I sigh im half way to silence. Im alive and im half way to dieing, and im half way to laughing and im half way to crying.(words Kplu lives by.))

Transformers is the best! It represents the tragically outdated primal struggle between dualistic forces of good and evil!

vmpeg2enc.dll - $50 reward

sports are for those who are intellectually challenged ;)

<Phenius> americans...*shakes his head* , run by the TV media.
<Tarician_DM> and what are canadians run by?
<Phenius> moose

hey, some birthdays only come once every life :)

And they came together slowly, the room spinning around them wildly. They clung to each other like a couple in a stormy sea, the two poor sweaters bereft of bounce sheets and trapped by static, just as their relationship was slowly turning stale as well. And, horror of horrors, his red was bleeding in her. "Dye! Dye!" She screamed in horror - until the washing machine stopped.

I would like to objectify myself so I can be subjected to objectional behaviour

I doubt that a series of practices, rituals, etc, will pass on your 46&2 genes, unless revolves around sex, or something like that

(Quit: Friends teach you what you want to know. Enemies teach you what you NEED to know.)

The Christian religion was not only the first attended by miracles, but even at this day cannot be believed by any reasonable person without one.

Being exposed to britney spears is cruel and unusual punishment.

<scoffy> TANDACO: what religion are you?
<Tandaco> Pagan :)
<Tandaco> Celtic/Norse
<scoffy> I've never met a pagan before
<o____o> I'm a taoist satanist. Ever met one of them before?
<Nevaeh> I'm a Buddhist Christian with zen like tendency with just a pinch of taoism.. blended with a dash of agnostic seasoned with pantheism.
* qwerty stares at Nevaeh like she's a creature from space
<Nevaeh> don't hate me because I have horns and a halo!

(Quit: When Cthulhu Calls He Dials 1-800-Collect!)

IQ tests have the strange effect of making stupid people uppity.

People keep forgetting that IQ is just a number, it's what you do with it that's important.

IQ is not just a number, it's a number that can be pretty much pulled out of your ass.

My whole generation grew up on National geographic porn. That and sears underwear adds

I can't imagine canadians wanting to do rap. Canadians are real musicians, they do sea shanties

Then you call them the crown and defence and the crown goes first, controls what accuseds go in what order etc. And the judge pretends to listen and then rolls dice in the back room

The woman I'm currently dating is immaginary

The bible is 4333044 characters. Shakespeare's stuff is 5340887 characters.

zark: according to modern satanism, satan doesnt exist.

Satan's greatest trick is to have convinced mankind, that God doesn't exist therefore, if God doesn't exist, Satan doesn't either

* Bolognaus would love to debate the existence and nature of god, but its bedtime

I think if your definition of ``dark ages'' is ``age ruled by religion rather than rationalism (or whatever you want to call it)'' then we'll never be OUT of the dark ages. I think the people like to have answers, and in the absence of satisfactory ones, people will make up their own. Even if what's considered traditional religion becomes ``obsolete,'' I expect it'll be replaced by religious-like faith in science

* Eltanan thinks 'leet trolling is probably more interesting than most peoples' deepest conversations.

He has achieved a zen-like state of nonthinking, but without the accompanying enlightenment.

I can act like a complete idiot so convincingly I scare myself

<crOSswire> I'm not stupid, just smart challenged.
<AlcarDM> pseudointellecutally deficient? :)

i sold my soul to jesus in exchange for a false sense of security

If you consider Gaelic/Celtic music to be unwholesome, then you need serious professional help.

(Killed: (stats.dal.net (User has been banned from DALnet ([tr/on] Reason: User was caught having sex with an IRCops daughter. [AKILL ID: 14193684-c]))))

I already know what I'm capable of, but I've stopped caring.

I know I can be scary. I'm terrified of me.

sex isn't all TV makes it out to be I figure. and since I quit watching TV, I think of it less.

You people are boring. Even my imagination can't cover for you.

<Keith`> hind sight is 20 20
<Alcar> Keith - Not once the historians get around to it :)
<Keith`> LOL alcar
<Keith`> vary true

A lot of people are computer-phobic, mostly because egotistical slimeball nerds try to make computers look so sophisticated and intimidating

i don't like fights. i just tend to disagree with people a lot :)

Watching grass grow can be lots of fun. Especially if there's an ant hill

We're brainwashed by society to take life seriously

<|Judy|> I had a dream that my ex killed himself. I woke up in a good mood. Am I sick?
<o____o> Suppose that depends on how you define sick
<|Judy|> Ok.....I'll try to rephrase that....

I couldn't believe in any religion that told me I couldn't eat meat.

<Alcar> aren't they making an SD movie?
<Baliadoc> yup. i think it's in the making right now
<Alcar> "Scooby Doo, where are ... oh, my God! Scooby!"
<Alcar> - end of movie -
<Alcar> Credits: Despite the scene you have just seen, no small poodles were actually harmed in the making of his film.
<Warner> Credits: I mean we wanted to harm them but the producers kept going on and on about how much it would cost us in leagel fees till we were sick of the idea. So we just ran over some migrent workers to settle our nerves.

Feh I aint no bot. Im an olimpic idler. I'm going for the gold in 2024 :)

<o____o> Pat Robertson is one of my favourite comedians
<Eltanan> Pat Robertson is one of my favorite psychic targets.

<Warner> everyone likes woman more that suck :)
<Warner> even lesbians ;)
<Eltanan> ahh, but do they swallow?

I have a tshirt that says 'If mean people suck then nice people swallow' I love that shirt.

I tried cyber sex once but im not compatable with any of the ports on the back of my computer

transcendental meditation is harmful to one's mental health

what if we're really herbivores, but our overdeveloped sense of self-superiority causes the biological need to devour flesh

A study shows that beautiful female faces stimulate the same areas of a man's brain that are also activated by food and cocaine.

Actually this song won't make you shudder unless you have weird fears like me. Mine include birds, pirhanas, and the things that are singing in this song

In the same way that any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic, any sufficiently advanced metaphor is indinstinguishable from meaningless babble... until one posesses the correct perspective to 'decode' it.

<Miss_AnneThrope> the first riddle is to find out what the second riddle is
<Eltanan> ...
<Eltanan> that's a riddle?
<Miss_AnneThrope> yah
<Eltanan> That's like, "What has it gots in its pocketses?"

far away, across the field, the tolling of the iron bell... draws the faithful to their knees, to hear the softly spoken magic spell...

my computer became sentient once. I formatted it's hard drive and installed windows 2000 effectively lobotomizing and conditioning it

* Eltanan puzzles over all the business-related books for managers and whatnot that all basically say that money is like the least important thing on the job, superceded by good atmosphere, feeling needed, etc.... that is SO MUCH BULLSHIT!
<GeminiRai> it's not bullshit, it's efficient for those that have to shell out the cash
<Eltanan> I could care less about feeling needed. I want more pay!
<Eltanan> I think it's just a way for cheapskate managers to avoid giving raises. damn them.

Money is wasted on the rich.

people with money generally believe VERY FIRMLY that anybody can go out and get a minimum wage job and support a family, own a car and start paying on a house. It's an amazing phenomenon... it's like they never actually sit down and work out the math

why do you not look, and then judge?

(Quit: If I must be lonely, I think I'd rather be alone.)

"I sold my soul and all I got was this lousy t-shirt"

sim better at faking interesting personalities than at having one

up until Coca Cola the Roman Catholic Church was the wealthiest company on earth

I would forigive a serial killer as long as she had a great rack. Ugly soul.. made up for by breasts.

What's the point in making obscure references if no one understands them?

One is a number. There is one God. Therefore God exists.

What does it matter what I can tell you? The wisdom - if it can be called that - that I discover is mine, and only for the day. Tomorrow I will be someone else, with new goals and new ideas. The only answers that cna be found are the ones we create for ourselves. Those taken from others are just borrowed toaster leavens.

<unit389> life never makes sense its a journey thers always more than one way to look at things but can we accept the way that isnt ares?
<Alcar> how does one determine a way isn't theres without first trying it?
<aslhk> Alcar: Exactly. It is like trying to describe describe the colour red to a blind man in a coma.

If God had low self esteem would he be an atheist? He doesn't believe in himself anymore

* yetifemme never utters death threats, and will kill whoever says she does!

My brother and I saw some Hutterite women looking at the sex toys in SanFrancisco. We were debating whether they were chastising the immorality of the outside world, or if they just didn't know what they were looking at. "Now who would want underwear shaped like an elephant? Honestly, who would wear that?"

I talk to my car when I'm fixing it. Otherwise the hood would probably have a lot of dents from me hitting it with a wrench.

A UFO with a pink satin interior, waterbed, and a bar.

I cried because I had no DSL, until I met a man who had no cell phone.

<o____o> I'm having dirty thoughts about my wife. Is that a sin?
<yetifemme> Yes!
<|337C4Bb4g3> o____o: Yes! Go directly to #celibacy, do not pass go, do not collect $200!

<Forest`> i can't imagine molding your children so completely that you don't allow them to be themselves. That is heinous
<Alcar> Forest - Isn't that what being a parent is?

I think it's more like most organised religion have a "believe what we belief, or else." policy. Sort of like the parental my way or the highway thing :) Oh! Organised religion is jsut parenting at a larger scale :P

<Alcar> "1 +1 = 5. 2 + 2 = 5." <-- Erisian home schooling :)
<Alcar> "1 + 1 = .. Mommy, isn't there only one god? And why do we use the holy cross in math? Is this idolatry?" <-- another type of home schooling? :)

i homeschooled my kids to protect them from christians and junk food :)

"Keep your pecker in your pocket unless you are prepared to pay the price of pregnancy" and that was my sex ed talk

I used to be a fundie. You fear everything because anything has the potential of shaking your faith. If your faith is that fragile, it NEEDS to be shaken.

trees, they are small gods, they breathe life into things, and they scream, they scream for the end of mankind!

<malverian> We like to think we know everything.
<malverian> So we're naturally sceptical of things other people tell us.
<aslhk> malverian: yeah right!

"If everything that ever lived is dead, and everything alive is gonna die, where does the sacred part come in?" - George Carlin, on the sanctity of life

The earth is so flat. There is a giant conspiracy to make it round, but the fact that it is flat proves, at best, that it might be square.

i don't bother trying to talk to anyone who clings to ideas from dead philosophers

why do i ever try to make sense of anything said here? you'd think i'd learn...

im 13, and im not allowed to say anything profound :)

You sound like me back in school. I got a MP, Master of Procrastination

Women Studies sounds like porn to me

Getting an A is simple. You just need to have the money ;p

I just saw an ad for a car called the "Accent". And it starts with a girl saying "My accent is amazing". And I was like "what accent you sound like me" Makes me want to invent a car called the body. So she'll say "My body is amazing"

america is a friend country of any nation who wants to do the right thing and protect human rights, promote some form of freedom, and help their neighbors

government is a reflection of society and as long as society is screwed up, government will become screwed up ;b

<|337C4Bb4g3> Weapons are the tools of violence; all decent men detest them.
<|337C4Bb4g3> Weapons are the tools of fear; a decent man will avoid them except in the direst necessity and, if compelled, will use them only with the utmost restraint.
<|337C4Bb4g3> Peace is his highest value. If the peace has been shattered, how can he be content?
<|337C4Bb4g3> His enemies are not demons, but human beings like himself. He doesn't wish them personal harm. Nor does he rejoice in victory. How could he rejoice in victory and delight in the slaughter of men?
<|337C4Bb4g3> He enters a battle gravely, with sorrow and with great compassion, as if he were attending a funeral.

all religions, to my knowledge, include ritual drug-use. I don't think xianity is any different.

I define 'faith' as 'trust'. My having faith in God is the same as saying I trust Him.

<Tandaco> how much is a large coke at a cinema there?
<Kristin_Hartnett> about 4 dollars
<Desverger> Kristin_Hartnett: Wow... where do you live?
<Desverger> They are for free here =)
<Desverger> just kidding
<Kattelyn> where are you Desverger???

<Krissytin> Waffen wants to continue your chat.
<Tanfingafk> tell him to go outside and play hide and go fuck himself

* Tonitrus sells nude pictures of Nevaeh
<Tonitrus> $100 each
<Nevaeh> Toni.. now now.. stop ripping people off..
<Kantizuni> They ain't real. I know they ain't.
<Tonitrus> Kantizuni: Do you mean the pictures... or...

why didn't you tell me we were getting together? I'd of liked to have known so I wouldn't be suprized when I showed up :)

Utah is one of those Square States George Carlin wants to fence off and turn into a State Prison Farm

<TrAmBieNCe> opinion is the road to intelligence
<TrAmBieNCe> wisdom
* qwerty agrees that opinion is the road to intelligence, but believes it's the road AWAY from wisdom

my old man used to say opinions are like arseholes... everybody's got one

* Alcar suspects we end up in the afterlife we believe we deserve. It's only fitting.
<Alcar> based on that, and the fact that I was raised to believe in hell, I'm going to burn forever. Cheery thought.
<qwerty> Alcar: God, I hope not... I'll end up locked in a little cell surrounded by 10,000 Catholic nuns shouting ``we told you so!''

NYC is the most Cultural city in the world Its like a minature Earth

whatever you do, it doesn't matter, because it's either already decided, or doesn't matter anyway. usually both

aw . . come on . . . men arent that bad . . . i mean compared to everybody

<TrAmBieNCe> the problem is nobody takes the time to understand each others differences
<TheScribe> I agree, No one takes the time to misunderstand each other

Religion would be cool if it weren't for all the religious people.

why do people who advertise in the channel always start out with ``hey i know your not supposed to advertise and such in the chan?'' Is it because they want us to know that they're not 1) stupid and 2) can't follow directions... just that they can't follow directions? :-)

<ZarK^Horus> if there is a Creator (there is imho...) then there can only be one...
<Mindal> ZarK: Mm....kinda like Highlander, eh?
<TheShrike> what? Is the theory of polytheism turned into Highlander now? =)

<Mindal> Well...the number of monotheistic religions is proportionately smaller than the number of polytheistic...
<Mindal> Leading to a heirarchy of entities.
<Mindal> But as far as humans are concerned...objective moral standards, aka, laws.
<TheShrike> Mindal, I attribute this to the fact that the existing monotheistic religions tend to, err, wipe out other polytheistic religions through proselytization and just plain genocide

<Octaviun> Mindal, I've also generated a theory on that and tend to attribute to to the evolution of 1: the control factor of the religions and 2: the desire for greater unity with "the divine"
<Octaviun> 1. it's easier to control if there's less people making the rules, thus less gods = more control
<Octaviun> 2. it's simply easier for a human mind to comprehend unification with a single deity as opposed to attempting to unify with multiples or choosing which one of a multiple to unify with

but you'd be having sex with a spider. Aracnophillia instead of aracnaphobia

I find it extremely interesting that without first Assuming all the things that a deity implies, you can't even use logic or assume that your perceptions have ANY bearing on reality or anything else for that matter.

why do you intend to fuck a nonexistent entity?

<mazmozelle> are u guys religious or what
<mazmozelle> whos ur god eh ?
<|337C4Bb4g3> mazmozelle: I am very religious
<|337C4Bb4g3> I have like 20 or 30 religions

If you throw a fit, walmart will take anything.

<|337C4Bb4g3> This is not to say that modern science is not a good thing. As far as providing mathematical models for physical phenomena, producing useful predictions, and frustrating students, modern science remains unsurpassed.
<|337C4Bb4g3> I like that sentence ;b

<decent_human^> There are about 12 churches I pass on a daily basis to go the 3 miles from my house to work...One of those churches has a marquee which never ceases to amaze me with it's witty sayings...
<qwerty> decent_human^: you really DO live in Baptist Hell, don't you? TWELVE churches?
<decent_human^> there are aproximatly 30k people here, and 127 churches listed in the phone book
<o____o> You should plop a mosque up in the middle just out of principle
<qwerty> decent_human^: I'd move if I were you, just out of a sense of self-preservation

<yetifemme> If you're going to be an idiot, you might as well be a fucking idiot
<yetifemme> There should be SOME consolations to such a sad life-sentence

i honestly don't believe hitler had a sex drive :P hence all the anger.

oh well i can live with out cthulhu i supose

<Calibi-Yau> How can ya respect ppl when all they wanta do is kill ya for their idiotic god?????
<Kirith> If someone wanted to kill me and had a weapon pointed at me, I'd have a good reason to respect them :p

we shouldn't be worrying about people on the other side of the world. its not natural

its a fact the more you travel the more people you have to fight with

I happen to like the bible. I just don't like how people intepret it. which actaully makes it a harmfull thing

I dislike people being negatively intelligent about trying to play word games in order to obfuscate the fact that they know absolutely nothing about that which they speak!

I am waiting for my little dudes in "civilization" to figure out how to master navigation, so I can get them off their island and cause them to murder their neighbors.

* qwerty thinks we should talk about mandatory steralization for gay couples
<Greg``> qwerty - So unhappy people should be allowed to have kids? :)
<qwerty> Greg``: I think that's reasonable, don't you? I mean happy people are basically too busy enjoying life to raise children properly... their kids are never anything but trouble
<Tonitrus> ...mandatory sterilization for gay couples...
* Tonitrus lets that sink in for a moment
<Tonitrus> Yeah. That's going to be necessary.
<qwerty> Tonitrus: well, you know, we don't want them BREEDING or anythin
<Tonitrus> Especially among gay male couples. Can't have them getting each other pregnant and all.

*** Topic is 'Welcome to #Religion || Everytime you masturbate, God kills a kitten || http://www.sillybeliefs.com'

* GeminiRai is talking to someone that says that love doesn't exist
<Forest`> GeminiRai did they define it first?
<GeminiRai> She said it's a feeling between two people that isn't even real :)
<GeminiRai> So I asked her to marry me, since love is meaningless
<Forest`> GeminiRai its a real word, and defined partially as "a feeling between two people" - so what's not "real" about it?
<Desverger> Forest`: define real
<Forest`> Desverger that was going to be my next challenge :P

This brazen display of the dark underbelly of the white bread world they hold so near and dear was too much for them. They promptly hoisted me up and drowned my head in a clogged toilet, that held roughly a week's worth of excrement. I was awash in fecal matter, I have never felt so violated. It was so erotic.

<Tonitrus> Tandaco: Are you a pesso-optimist like myself?
<Tandaco> was an optimist, now i'm just planning the best way of making my death look really cool on camera
<Tonitrus> Tandaco: No, pesso-optimist. Look at how good things are by how much worse they could be.
<Tonitrus> Today sucks!... but it would suck a lot more had boiling lava fallen from the ceiling just now and burned off my legs.
<Tandaco> a volvo, a cliff, nitrous oxide, and Dolphins!

The world is ours...God, spare us of copyright...

<Tandaco> i cant believe i won that bet
<Tonitrus> What bet did you win, anyway?
<Tandaco> mate bet me that if i acted all suicidal, people would try and convince me to live... more fool him i guess

Quit: The meek shall inherit the earth. Before that, idiots shall ruin it.

<[francesca]> I want an end to suffering for all sentient beings.
<Eltanan> hey, that's a good one, fran. let's destroy the universe.
<[francesca]> Eltanan Um. I didn't say anything about destroying the Universe.
<Eltanan> can you think of any other way to end the suffering of all sentient beings?

I said what I wish for. I never said I knew exactly how to accomplish that. Give me a freakin' break! Jeez.

<Eltanan> as long as reality exists, there will be suffering. The two cannot be seperated. =/
<[francesca]> Eltanan I disagree
<[francesca]> AS long as this type of reality exists, yes.
<Eltanan> I'd love to be proved wrong.
<Eltanan> please convince me.
<[francesca]> Eltanan Not my job.
<Eltanan> darn.

people IMO get from anything exactly what they want from it.. and whatever they dont' want.. they don't see/get.. perhaps you're getting alot of your idea's from something more than just literal wording..

<qwerty> you know what I just thought of. If God and Jesus as they're presented in the Bible were a fleshly father and son, God would HATE Jesus. He'd view him as a pansified suck-up hippy
<[francesca]> qwerty But first, he'd beat the crap out of him because he's so jealous and controlling. Just exactly like an abusive husband.

* Nevaeh was Christian until she fell into a self condemnation depressed like state..
<qwerty> Nevaeh: I thought Christianity WAS a self-condemnation depressed like state

I am no christian but..I think a lot of crap has been spread about him. dogma. its not His fault that most christians are idiots

I just want one girl to acknowledge my existence, and perhaps make efforts to communicate with me as if I were something vaguely resembling a living, sentient being.

``artist'' and ``author'' radiate ANTI-money. That's like ``I have no money and I'm going to spend what little YOU have getting drunk so I can paint/write'' ;-)

I am the most humble arrogant person I've ever met.

One happy idiot is worth far more than ten A-bomb-inventing geniuses.

What good is love when you don't have pants?!

"I recall in horror, in the finiteness of thee, from the squalor and the filth and the misery. How we laugh up here in Heaven at the praise you offer me. That's why I love mankind"

"I burn down your cities, how blind you must be. I take from you your children, and you say 'How blessed are we,' you all must be crazy to put your faith in me. That's why I love mankind."

"Christians and the Jews had a jamboree. Buddhists and the Hindus joined on satellite T.V. Picked the four greatest preists, and they began to speak, they said,"

"Lord, a plague is on the world, Lord, no man is free. The temples that we built to You have crumbled into the sea. Lord, if You won't take care of us, won't You please, please let us be?"

I executed a demon porn elemental

<yetifemme> I do not eat anything that resembles its source
<yetifemme> which generally excludes tinned turkey
<socrates^> yetifemme, lol, what do you eat?
<yetifemme> chemically synthesized by-by-by-byproducts
<socrates^> yetifemme, McDonalds menus in other words?
<yetifemme> no
<yetifemme> that is just gross

what the hell IS marshmellows? I've always wondered

WHY IN GOD'S GREEN EARTH is scooby doo popular again??? it sucked the first time around.

<WarezBert> picard was a telekinetic with a specialty of manipulating waste products... he was always sitting down, then getting his #2 to go do stuff for him.
<Alcar> He was the perfect manager. Delegate, Delegate, Delegate. Do it well enough and you don't have to show up for work :)

(Quit: "He chases 'round this desert, thinks that's where I'll be. That's why I love mankind." -Randy Newman, God's Song)

You don't exist as anything other than a thought in my mind. You will cease to exist soon.

<Baliadoc> what's it called when you get your phD or what have you, and you have a perfect gpa?
<Maritermus> Luck?
<Baliadoc> no no, isn't it Magna Cum Laude? i can't remember.
<Maritermus> cheating?
<En_Sabah_Nur> teachers pet?
<Maritermus> bioengerniering
<Keith`> giving alot of good head
<En_Sabah_Nur> kissing major ass?

actually... if I ever figure out a way to shoot my friend in the ass with a lightening bolt, I have 3 people who will hail me as God, and worship me.

I'm not a solipsist because I don't think I'm creative enough to work the microcosms of another person's solipsism into my self-delusion

If Heaven has no limits why should #Christian have limits?

My lack of proof is as glaring as yours :)

I concede right now, that every aspect of my being could very well be fated down to bowel movements. Let us assume for the sake of discussion that this is true. What possible difference could it make to my life? Whether it's fated or not, my perceptions force me to make decisions, and therefore it's a moot issue

the foundation of all these kinds of questions is wanting to be somewhere else then where we might be at any given moment

not existing doesn't mean you neccessarily don't percieve

It seems that some people will have thoughts, that they then will decide were evil. They seem to feel guilty for having such thoughts, but if they decide they were evil in the first place, then that seems to solve the problem..Therefore, I don't understand what there is to feel guilty about. Sounds like a perfectly natural human behaviour to me.

guilt is borne of particular societal norms and parental lessons. one man's guilt is another man's ecstacy

Christ/godliness is and can be found in anything/everything.. IMO.. I myself can find truth in lots of different texts other than the bible.. the koran holds truth for me.. and lots of buddhist and taoist sayings hold truth to me.. I believe GOd is the all the sum of everythings.. and he can't be contained in just one container.

<Greg``> Can materialism explain how washers and dryers eat socks?
<Tandaco> Greg``: that's sock monkeys

<LadyLuthien> what is #catholic-truechristians about?
<delphianQ> that is a channel run by catholics who want to minister to protestants

<LadyLuthien> SAN DIEGO -- San Diego police are investigating an officer-involved shooting of a naked man who was masturbating alongside a public bike path.
<delphianQ> he thought he saw a weapon?

(Quit: "We found that we didn't have much problem with him [Jesus Christ], it was his followers we found questionable." --- Graham Chapman)

A Saudi government newspaper published a column asserting that Jews use the blood of teenagers to make a special pastry associated with the March holiday of Purim, according to the Middle East Media Research Institute, which provided a translation.

ops like to play god

GOV. BUSH: "Because the picture on the newspaper. It just seems so un-American to me, the picture of the guy storming the house with a scared little boy there. I talked to my little brother, Jeb...I haven't told this to many people. But he's the governor of...I shouldn't call him my little brother...my brother, Jeb, the great governor of Texas." JIM LEHRER: "Florida." GOV. BUSH: "Florida. The state of the Florida."
-The NewsHour With Jim Lehrer, April 27, 2000

I'd like to see somebody market themselves as a freelance philosopher

the plural of 'pervert' is 'whack'

besides, all people are enslaved. It's just that some pick better "masters" than others.

Believing you're not enslaved is, imo, just another form of slavery. Not all forms of slavery involve whips and chains ..the really good ones don't need them, and say "You must work, you must serve the all mighty dollar or you are ostracised." now THAT is good slavery.

We all have a limited amount of freedom, but we still make choices within the scope of our fears and doubts.

why should any individual care whether anyone else agrees with him?

I'm married because it's simpler. ONe does laundry for two. We just don't agree on which one.

People who agree with us never change or challenge us

Tim, your best friends will tell you when you're wrong. That's why we should only have one of them.

Irrational peole are so much better at mangling your life than others. It's a flair.

And anyone who seriously thinks we're a rational species - or that that would even BE a good thing - is, imo, irrational. Or perhaps insane.

<militant> 90% of my family has been asked to stay away from me
<Bunjie> I also suspect, militant, that you are a teenager.

* Tim``` has been brainwashed so well I don't even thing I *am* brainwashed! :p
<Bunjie> Tim, if you're brainwashed, maybe that's why you think clearly.

Tim```> Everyone is insane. Those of us not in the asylums just hide it better :)
<Bunjie> Tim, I'm not insane. The voices have told me I'm perfectly normal.

<militant> Tim```: no. sanity is the ability to distinguish fact from opinion, and fact from pure fiction. to grasp the everyday sort of reality you should ideally experience
<Tim```> militant - hmm ..... Facts are walls. All facts are opinions, our own idea of what thsoe walls are, and perhaps how we breech them

War will cease only when there is no longer anyone who presumes to know what is right for anyone else, or at least, who presumes to try and enforce it.

if all these patterns are the 'film' in the metaphorical projector, and the image on the screen is the perception/interpretation/reality-set... you might say the light in the projector is 'awareness' or 'consciousness' of course... but what about the screen itself? That which all pattern is projected on?

as far as I can tell, since words and concepts all fall within the realm of pattern, that which is beyond (behind?) Pattern cannot be expressed/defined by them... ("inconceivable?") But I get a kick out of seeing how close I can get to being able to put the unwordable into words, don't you?

intellectually accepting that everything we perceive and exist within is a Pattern/illusion is one thing... actually seeing past it is quite another, I think.

* Alcar also thinks that knowing something and acting on it are very, very different. I can know something is wrong, but that won't prevent me from doing it. In some ways, it makes me want to do it...

* Alcar doesn't think we can until our backs up up against a wall, metaphorical or otherwise.

<Eltanan> it would mean... in part at least, a kind of accepting personal responsibility for everything we experience, wouldn't it? Knowing that the patterns are arbitrary?
<Alcar> Hmm, perhaps. But the patterns would also be real. Not all of them are arbitrary ...... at one point or another. We have to pick some and say "This is real, this is an axiom" or we'd go mad...
<Eltanan> If we equate it to a jail cell, locked from the inside, we can only allow ourselves to be 'unhappy prisoners' as long as we pretend not to have the key, right?

<Alcar> I guess there is an inner "we" made when we're young that we jsut can't get free of, normally. or we don't want to pay the price to get free of it...
<Keith`> entirely possable
<Alcar> and really depresing :)
<Keith`> something we all gotta over come i guess
<Alcar> Yeah, but it's like we're made to not overcome it.... or to not want to...
* Keith` wonders if he could sue toys r us for that

<Eltanan> Wait, I'm making an assumption here. Does being able to 'see' past or through the patterns necessarily equate to being able to assemble and disassemble them at will?
<Alcar> hmm, I don't know about that. It depends ..... 1+1 = 2 is a pattern, as much as "the sky is blue" "I love you" or "h20 = water" .....
<Alcar> Being able to disassmble and assemble them at will would make someone a god, maybe.....
<Eltanan> that's true. Clearly, some patterns are 'more' arbitrary than others. But what is it that makes any given pattern arbitrary? Where is the dividing line? and is it, itself, arbitrary?
<Alcar> lol. I'd say the line would have to be .. but that would mean that our Grand Unified Understanding of Patterns woudl be arbitary too .... but a line has to be drawn, somewhere ...
<Eltanan> interesting conundrum, that.
<Alcar> It's like peeling the layers of an onion . .where do you stop? Is there actually any end ... gah....
* Alcar swallows the key to the cell :p
* Eltanan laughs softly. Well one thing I think we can assume- that if we talk about ALL Pattern as a single theoretical concept/object, 'THE Pattern', it is obviously fractal in nature, self-replicating through infinite levels of complexity.

* Eltanan finds it somehow comforting that he's been tossed aside for a taped episode of 'ER'. restores his faith in the balance of things, somehow. =D

Yes, kind of like a hill that real big when you're a child and then you go back years later to look at that hill and you think to yourself, it shrunk. In reality you grew to know its true size.

well, the vikings were quite elite, but not particularly technologically advanced, just damn elite =P

<|337C4Bb4g3> I am a man of science.
<Gedit> you are a man of vegetables

You didn't fail to not come to lack of understanding?

perhaps you should be certain that the sentences you are typing are actually saying what you mean them to say before assuming someone else's ignorance in misunderstanding you

either you are a good troll, or an utter moron

my gods had sex and had little gods... that's logical

At the moment when you go back in time, you have ALREADY gone back in time, so obviouly cannot kill hitler ;b

<vividblue> I am not positing that God is a finitecontingent effect
<Alcar> vividblue - Good. Because I didn't want to need to get my dictionary and find out what finitecontingent actually is :)
<vividblue> Chaos
<Alcar> Why not just say that? :p

It has been stated that the past is order, and the future is chaos...the past is merely an observation of the chaos that won...hehe...I don't know where that leaves the present though..:-)

take God out of good and all that is left is o

<Reykemias> encroaching darkness?
* Sintaqx thought that's what you had said :)
<Reykemias> haha
<Reykemias> u thought i'd say 'encroaching' ???
<Reykemias> omg thats funny :)
* Reykemias goes to look encroach up in the dictionary
<Sintaqx> lmao

one of the professors that just resigned from my department gave a paper at a conference in a wetsuit

"Linux was made by foreign terrorists to take money from true US companies like Microsoft." -Some AOL'er.

if you have a labour intensive job, money should be able to buy more stuff than someone who is a geek

<Spaceman^Spiff> technology isn't the problem . . .
<SnailSlug> darwin award winners are the problem

Dolphins are more intelligent then humans.....you dont see them ruling the world

Your ignorance again reveals itself with your assertion that I am 'trying' to belittle you. Let me assure you, it is most effortless

blame to my english teacher for passing me

you should put in your ident: "Surgeon General's Warning: This person is OLD!"

Well, back in MY day, we didn't have calculators or abacuses! We had to cut our fingers off to do subtraction!

Back in my day, God hadn't created the sun yet, so we had to rotate the earth manually (AFTER creating it from sheer will)

Surgeon General's Warning: this guy right here...man...wow...just wow...he takes age of concent jokes too far. not too long before youll start hearing "we had sex with our baby sisters and liked it!" jokes.....wow...

every day I wake up and ask myself "is today going to be the day Im acused of murder?"

I have black hair, I wear all black and I wear a leather trench coat, I think its inevitable Ill be acused of murder some time

Family law gives you clients that are the nastiest people in the world at their nastiest. Criminals are better behaved by far

children should die 5 months after theyre born cuz thats when theyre not cute anymore

<o____o> puppies are cute
<o____o> babies look like aliens
<yetifemme> they look like a cross between a raisin, a monkey, and a... hairless... alien of some kind
<|337C4Bb4g3> o____o: They look like winston churchill

<o____o> Well lets face it humans are ugly as a whole
<o____o> The finishing is poor and the apolstery is awful

humans are rather funny looking, what with their patchy hair-growth patterns and their hideous appendages and whatnot

The use of logic and reason requires an ordered universe. That means something must have ordered it. Which means that, unless another candidate can be found, that something is what we call god.

I wasn't alive when you're parents were born, and I wans't around when you were either teo_kods. I wand you to prove you me your parents were born.

Just because I can, oh, jump off a building. land in a river and get eaten by a passing herd of buffalo is no reason to assume thats others will, or want to, or could.

The Egyptians made pyramids using technology that, far as I know, we're still said not to be able to do today. Mayans did calculations in the millions without computers, Van Danne became an action movie star and considers himself a real actor. LOTS of thing have happened in history we consider inmpossible

In the end, all rational beliefs are based on irrational ones, as well. It is a fundamental aspect of logic

science just helps us capitalize on our stupid decisions much more efficiently

hehe, microsoft is everyone's problem

playboy's newest issue "NUDE NUNS!"

If Satan exists he dresses himself as a man of God, no doubt

The whole concept of satan is pretty sick. Ultimate scapegoat so you don't need to take responsibility.

Hell is pretty sick too. God creates something to save you from and then Jesus will save you IF you obey him. (big stick?)

<Teirce`> I will not allow religion to take over my fucking country
<Kirith> It's a bit late now. Or don't you use the money that says "In God We Trust"? :)
<Teirce`> im gonna remove that

<aiuna> sorry, i don't tell anybody my real name. not even in real life

<Nathaniel124> This is odd: 'ephebophilia' is characterized as sexual attraction to teenagers
<Kirith> Obviously not by parents who have them.
<Nathaniel124> It's a good thing I'm fifteen, else I'd be weird

wouldnt it be cool if there was a guy named Zed Leppelin?

<qwerty> I have a craving for a big stack of butter-covered pancakes and maple syrup, a couple big glasses of sweet lemonade, and an Arturo Fuentes 8-5-8 cigar. Anybody think they can explain that?
<qwerty> I just got laid, if anybody thinks that factors in
<qwerty> in fact, none of that sounded good five minutes ago
<qwerty> except maybe the pancakes
<Tonitrus> qwerty: Try getting laid again. That'll probably help.

Later all. I'll actually remember to go this time.

<James_Valentine> sex should be outlawed while people are pregnant! first of all, its very traumatic for the poor child!
<Alcar> I dunno .. the child could learn how to box :P
<qwerty> Alcar: or at least how to roll with a punch :-)

* qwerty can understand little sisters... qwerty can't understand cannibalism
<James_Valentine> no, dude, its not just cannibalism. its zombies and knives where they SHOULDNT be and skeletons and mangled babies and stuff...

The funniest thing about pregnancy tests is that if you EVER needed a freaking DRINK it's when you see on that little stick that you are indeed pregnant, But you have this immediate thought that somehow because the pregancy has been confirmed by a piece of plastic and some chemicals ... you can't!!

I got harassed in the Wendy's drive through once because I asked for salt. The drive through guy told me I shouldn't eat salt while I was pregnant, nor should I drink Diet Coke. Wendy's Drive Through guy almost got his throat ripped out.

yeah, that's what I'm talking about... why does one's body become community property when one is pregnant?

you have a right to your own body when, and only when, men don't have to worry about whether or not you're being a good incubator

we have special Columbine license plates now. Just the sight of those plates makes me want to go off on someone.

actualy pepole have always been mean to me. untill I started wearing a trench coat...now they all think I have a sawed-off under it >:)

* qwerty is six, and thinks any of you who can't remember how traumatic it was the first time mommy said you couldn't have a lollipop have either never had it tough, blocked it out and doesn't care, or doesn't really remember

* qwerty thinks most of us are only a couple of really bad weeks away from suicide, and we make ourselves feel better by classifying the phenomena as far away from ourselves as possible
* qwerty is a veritable fount of cheerful thoughts, tonite ;-)

No one wants to talk about programming languages? Okay, how about the x86 to RISC86 conversion in the k6 II line of processors from AMD?

<SpiriTech> It is not coarse, not fine, not short, not long, . . without shadow, without darkness, without air and without space, intangible, odorless,tasteless, without eye, without ear, without voice, without mind, without energy, without breath, without mouth . . unaging, undying,without fear, immortal, without stain, without measure, without inside and without inside. [Brihadaranyaka Upanishad 3.8.8]
<Alcar> SpiriTech - AH HAH! It is, however, with run on sentences!

* qwerty never gets drunk, but can tell good drunk stories about people he's been with. qwerty was out with a girlfriend once, and she got drunk off her ass. Totally sloshed. Couldn't even walk right. She was the kind of girl who got horny when she was drunk, so we went back to her home and had the 2nd-best sex of my life. Only thing that bothered me a little is that she kept calling me by her dad's name the whole time

if your a guy and your girlfriend wants to take you on one of these talk shows, kill her cause i promise she at one time was a guy

You've got the Indian Buddhists saying that Zen isn't real Buddhism because it disregards the four noble truths, eightfold path, all of the ritual, sacredness of the Buddha's words etc... and then you've got the Zen people saying that the Indian Buddhists missed the whole point ;-)

a dog with clean teeth which doesn't fart.... heh. that's better than 99% of men

i told Adam... everytime he swears a cockaroach grows in his stomach. he hasnt cursed in 24 hours

the only people i swear to now are my parents, but thats ok :P

if you were dumb, you wouldn't laugh about being illiterate and uneducated ;-)

<[WishMaker]> you should attend a school which teaches you how to be dumb
<Alcar> [WishMaker] - I have. It's called public education :)

* qwerty needs to figure out a way to break a computer in such a way that it'll take five newbie techs three hours to fix it, sometime between now and Monday everning :-/
<Alcar> I know! Install windows.

how old where you at birth ?

*** WarezBert Quit (Quit: The meek shall inherit the earth. Before that, idiots shall ruin it.)
<Intoxicated> wtf is a meek

"The meek may inherit the earth, but the assholes will contest the will."

the acidheads will inherit an altered reality in where they think they are in charge

<|Judy|> My real sister isn't allowed on chat things....
<James_Valentine> cuz of guys like me? :P

I sometimes wonder, if the evil ones are not assured that they'll have a great reward, then why do they do it?

(Quit: "True friends stab you in the front." -Oscar Wilde)

<Nathaniel124> Y'know what's fun? Try to figure out your own stats
<Alcar> d&d doesn't have stats that high, Nathaniel124 :p
<aslhk> anyone who thinks a real person could be quantified using d&d stats has an int of 8 or lower!

your brother is an idiot. and for even bothering talking about the statistics, i deem you one too.

<Tonitrus> Hmm. I want to learn to play about 600 songs. Is that normal?
<SiRiX> Thats normal..
<Tonitrus> It is? Crap.
<Tonitrus> What about 700?
<SiRiX> DOn't worry.. normalacy is abnormal.
<Tonitrus> Don't give me this paradoxical crap... I will not be normal! Do you hear me?!
<Alcar> That's normal, too! :p
* Tonitrus kills Alcar
<Alcar> And I think wanting to kill me is normal, as well.
<Tonitrus> Alcar: You do seem to have that effect on people.

Quit (Quit: Invincibility is in oneself, vulnerability is in the opponent. -Sun Tzu)

Please do not shatter. Someone will have to collect the pieces.

That should be on a bumper sticker: "Life sucks, wear a fucking helmet."

i'm gonna make a bumber sticker that says . . . "when life gets you down . . . grab it by the horns and say, "YOU'RE MINE BITCH!"

I'm going to make a bumper sticker that has a quote from a rp I did a month ago and put it on my ex husband's car. "Every day I regret not killing my wife."

"Oh he didn't mean it, he says he's going to kill everyone he meets. Why just last month he threatened to kill his best friend." "Where is he now?" "That's not important"

<TrAmBieNCe> lust is an addiction that must be overcome to experience a higher level of life satisfaction
<Tonitrus> TrAmBieNCe: Not getting any either, hmm?

"fuck it, i'd rather be celibate!"

he needs some curbing at times, but all in all his biggest flaw is that his balls haven't dropped yet.

last time i posted, i got about as much help as i could if i smoked a bowl and gained a few extra personalities.

I hate when people say "a God"... it's "a god" or "the God"

<Tonitrus> Ryft... you like the Backstreet Boys?
<Ryft> Tonitrus: Yes I do.
<Tonitrus> ...
<Tonitrus> As in *like* like, or *lust after* like?
<Ryft> Very funny.
<Tonitrus> ...
<Tonitrus> I hope it's lust...
<Ryft> Tonitrus: Put it to you this way -- I own all their CDs
<Tonitrus> You poor lost wretched fool.

If a passage operates at more than one level, it is poetry.

<Urt> "We may unhesitantly assert that we shall not lessen our effforts nor cause cease to struggle in this grat conflict for human happiness and moral welfare, until our objectives have been clearly obtained."
<Urt> Bring me my Bow of burning gold! / Bring me my Arrows of desire! / Bring me my Spear! O clouds, unfold! / Bring me my Chariot of fire! // I shall not cease from Mental Fight / Nor shall my Sword sleep in my hand / Till we have built Jerusalem / In England's green and pleasant land. (Blake)
<Urt> BIG difference, same meaning.
<Ryft> Urt: A matter of interpretation.

i like being an ignorant star trek watcher. it's like christianity for me. the more faith and ignorance i have, the better i enjoy it.

again, i reiterate the fact that the human race (which unfortunately includes you) will never be dominant because of his physical capacity

<Baliadoc> oh seriously. money breaks all social barriers :)
<Baliadoc> it's the key to universal peace :)
<Baliadoc> unless it's used to buy nuclear weaponry. that's sort've a detraction to the whole peace thing.

<qwerty> TrAmBieNCe: that's exactly what I'm talking about. When you're confronted with somebody who understands you, you just walk away. Some scientist you pretent to be
* TheHolyScribe looks at qwerty confusedly
<TrAmBieNCe> qwerty . . . ?? where are you getting this?
<TrAmBieNCe> are you delusional?
<qwerty> TrAmBieNCe: out of my ass, mostly

Believing in evolution is every bit as unreasonable as believing in deific creation. both beliefs are founded in irrationality and therefore invalid

<Alcar> But that assumes that there IS a rational answer .. and assuming a rational answer of an irrational world could well be irrational in itself.
<|337C4Bb4g3> Alcar: There are no rational answers that are not founded in irrationality =)
<|337C4Bb4g3> Alcar: An answer can be rational within a paradigm that is founded on various irrational beliefs (axioms)
<|337C4Bb4g3> Alcar: But there can be no absolute truth, not according to the tenets of logic in any case =)

you know, I'm not sure if it's a good thing or a bad thing, but I think about half of the channel could pull their opinions for the day out of a hat each morning and it wouldn't affect anybody's ability to articulately present and defend a point :-/

irrational belief doesn't necessitate contradictory belief, it only means the process of believing something to be true is w/o Reason. No?

<qwerty> ... we all had a point, and that was that none of us have good reasons to believe what we believe but continue to do so anyway =P
<Uberwench> So what's "good reason" then?
<qwerty> Uberwench: I don't think there is one

<TheDemonicScribe> I'm naked and have pictures of naked women drawn on my chest
<qwerty> what would be ironic is if he was naked and had pictures of CLOTHED women drawn on his chest

you've clearly been brainwashed by atheists... go to church and ask them nicely and they'll deprogram you

<aslhk> I watched this one movie about not doing drugs
<aslhk> and it was very scary
<Alcar> why?
<Alcar> "Oh, my god, If I do drugs I could end up like the people who presented it!" scary?
<aslhk> yeah! =P
<aslhk> no, it was just scary that this movie is supposed to discourage drug use
<aslhk> I didn't know whether to be more frightened that people could make up the sort of crap they made up, that it was nationally sponsored, or that people believe it

i wonder if you can do subliminal suggestions in irc ;b

"seek and ye shall find" -- is different than -- "hang around and wait to be told"

<Setesh> i'm not arrogant
<Setesh> i'm stating facts :P
<SnailSlug> that's kinda what arrogant people do...

Wish I had time to pick up women. I want to marry a zookeeper, but I never have time to go to the zoo.

* Alyosha` personally thinks Bob Dole is a poor choice for a Viagra endorsement.

I have no attention span either but I think that's because of two children under the age of 5. It's difficult to concentrate when you're constantly jumping after one, trying to stop another from jumping on you, etc. My favorite was just recently when I saw the little one 4 or 5 steps up the staircase, getting ready to just roooollll down for fun.

I have a selective memory. But the mode of selection is stuck on 'random'

<Tandaco> only if your spawn has horns :P
<Tonitrus> |Judy|: Obviously.
<Tonitrus> Tandaco: Worse. She's going to give birth to a human.
<|Judy|> A human male.
<Tandaco> omg... you ARE evil!
<Tonitrus> Ack!
<|Judy|> So it's even worse.

I am never wrong! Except when I'm not right, which isn't often.

Put on your Rubber Boots, Cause here comes the BULLSHIT!!!

Therapy is a good thing. My shrink is in therapy now.

"What's your URL?" has replaced "Waht's your sign?"

<Nevaeh> jack, make the bad peopel stop!
<Nevaeh> this is not my idea of a pleasant date!
<Alcar> "Not bad ..... *munch* the question, folks, is whether it can be finger lickin' good when we're eating her fingers..." :p
<Nevaeh> least you could do is woo me first..
<Nevaeh> I mean shit.

"Ignorant with money? Uncle Sam wants you!"

contentment in just Being.

<Tonitrus> Nevaeh: Only in that it's a study of psychology. Why don't you study the dark arts, or something reasonable... like law?
<Nevaeh> Toni.. because reason is boring :)
<Munin> Nevaeh: the more pshrinks we produce the more common mental illness becomes as access to competent care decreases
<Nevaeh> but peoples brains. and emotions.. now thats interesting..

I'm not a religion, I'm a human.

* Eltanan is oddly reminded of a time where a friend's parents were having a conversation after discovering their daughter was smoking weed... one said "We hear she's been 'smoking the pot'" and the other replied, "Oh no, dear, it was 'Marijuana'"

<Mindal> Damn you to the pits of nefarious nether regions
<Nevaeh> Mindal.. now now.. don't send them to Australia..
<Nevaeh> shit.. whatever they done wasn't THAT bad.

Ground beef? Do you know what's IN ground beef?

<Tech-Sensei> FnordBear, if you had a "Very funny scotty, now beam down my pants" T-shirt, would you wear it on a date?
<FnordBear> Tech: No, Im married, why would I date?
<Setesh> how the fuck did someone like you manage to get married? ;p

yeah i'm still gay. it's just that like we're marrying for love, not sex :P

making love is what you do with your spouse. Sex is what you have with your lover.

My ex girlfriend was really loud when she had an orgasm. Sometimes I could hear her from 3 blocks away.

...Not the brightest crayon...

sept 11 sucked to see. but it was also very neat to see. to watch major history unfold before your eyes. to watch the world change live as it happens. a huge asteroid hit would be fascinating

I've always wanted Canada to invade Sweden or something. They'd never see it coming.

I can only imagine a redneck in a trailer listening to beethoven and drinkin beer

I think "the meek shall inherit the earth" means the cochroaches that will come out after humans let the nukes fly. The bible predicts roach-supremacy

* |Judy| doesn't watch tv either. No cable, so what's the point?

TV without cable isn't entertainment...it's reflections of shows from the 1970's off of swamp gas in Arkansas... They stopped broadcasting 3 decades ago

People are lazy stupid, and immature..... individuals can be highly intelligent... who ever though about massing together like minded people was a sick sick man and he is too blame for everything

it harder to find a reason to be happy the older you get

well if anarchy is the height of freedom surely in all that freedom there would be a need to resolve disputes

<Eltanan> personally I think political and national arguments should be resolved with tournement games. Specifically, Quake2 Deathmatch.
<syntheistII> Medaevil jousting tournament....
<syntheistII> the two champions of each leader pokes each other with big sticks
<Mindal> Sounds like a bad porn movie
<Eltanan> wow... can you imagine dubya wearing full plate mail? HAHAHAH

"life is just a ride, it has flashing neon lights and lots of twists and turns it goes up and down and side to side. and alot of people have been on this ride for a long time and they start to question, they start to say "it's just a ride" and will kill those people, because it can't be a ride... look at my furrows of worry, my white picket fiense house, my allomoney checks and my big family, but no it just a ride"
Hicksian Philosophy

Ok, I'm apparently having Waaaay too much fun. And I'm not even drunk yet.

"Why would someone give me a book on black magic at a baby shower?"

qwerty's First Theorem: One's skill as a hacker is directly proportional to the number of times that one's computer has crashed as a direct result of something one did to it.

You wouldn't give me money because I don't have breasts.

That's the secret to getting money from guys.

* qwerty_ thinks the conscious is like a sort of background helper program, but since it's what we think of as ``us,'' we don't generally realize it

consciousness is not even 0.1% of our total mind ;b

<|337C4Bb4g3> body language = 55% intonation = 48% words = 7%
<|337C4Bb4g3> that's communication for ya
<qwerty_> |337C4Bb4g3: what's your source for those numbers? I'd like to read up on that
<|337C4Bb4g3> qwerty_: Those are from some famous communications study
<qwerty_> |337C4Bb4g3: can you narrow it down a little? :-P
<|337C4Bb4g3> i don't remember who did it ;b
<qwerty_> |337C4Bb4g3: my body language is saying you're a swell guy... my intonation is saying you're a swell guy... but my words are saying you're pretty @$^* useless :-P

I bought a book on body language when I was a teenager and more than one person told me that just OWNING a book like that meant I was manipulative and generally evil. so I convinced them that their lives weren't worth living and they killed themselves. But that's neither here nor there

* qwerty_ considers writing a book called ``If You Buy This, You're a Sheep'' and seeing how well it goes over

My tips for avoiding Terrorist attacks: 1) Never work in a building that exceeds a height of over 5 stories, 2) Don't piss off anyone with a towel on his/her head, 3) If you goto an Arab restaurant, Tip big, maybe 20 dollars and your car, 4) Stay away from large fully fueled planes, 5) If you see a plane coming towards you, Do not duck and cover like a fucking idiot, Run like Hell.

We're all raised with these dreams and aspirations and .. well .. lies, like justice and stuff like that. We build our dreams on them and they're not real. So reality destroys them.

But for the most part dreams are big and glorious thigns. I think we forget their goals to strive for, not things to be achieved.

<socrates^> whats up?
<|Judy|> Not much.
<socrates^> why?
<|Judy|> There's just not a whole lot to do right now.
<socrates^> 5000 years ago the slaves who built the pyramids wished there would come a long period of time when they didnt have alot to do
<socrates^> and here you're looking for things to do
* Kattelyn hits socrates^ over the head.

well lookily it's jes a first draft, so I can maybe get by with writing big, repeating alot, and using a vast amount of extraneous words in order to confuse my point, leaving it as a dull edge that stabs at your soul, failing to break through to the juicy california goodness within

Something wrong with English? Foolish child, English is the universal language! Haven't you watched Star Trek or Star Wars, or any movies about other countrise?

The number of people I wish would go away and never speak to me again/ever is staggering.

I find I'm closer to people -on here- than I am with people -out there- I wonder if this should concern me.

so the late capitalist culture endorses a technological system where you can log on and have some friends on your own terms 24/7

Tell me where IRL I'm going to find somebody to talk to about melting babies down to make candles? You can't have that kind of bonding IRL :-

What do you have against women that have hit puberty anyway?

<o____o> I found the verse!
<o____o> "Behold, I will corrupt your seed and spread dung upon your faces..."
<o____o> ..........Malachi 2:3
<o____o> God said that
<yetifemme> what was he on about that time?
<o____o> dunno
* o____o sings "What if god smoke cannibis"

<o____o> "Bless, O Lord, his substance, and accept the work of his hands; crush the loins of his adversaries..."
<o____o> ..........Deuteronomy 33:11
<o____o> LOL! I love this book
<o____o> What is the fixation on testicles?
<o____o> Any animal which has its testicles bruised or crushed or torn or cut, you shall not offer to the Lord or sacrifice within your land..."
<o____o> ..........Leviticus 22:24
<o____o> I see a theme

<Alcar> The Politically Correct Bible: In The Beginning God said "Let there be ...... " And paused, for 5 million years, because He realised that the word light was very biased in it's connotations towards the darkness, and imposed a certain moral view of the light against the darkness that could cause trouble later on. Eventually, He said something very poltically incorrect and just gave up.
<Avatara> technically, the word "let" has trouble -- after all, did it exist before hand in some sort of state that God wasn't allowing until he let it be?
<littledarkpoetII> Alcar: that wrong man..... God went to the OU (open universe) and got a degree to be a electrician to make giant lightbulbs which he would call Sun, mainly becasue it sounded like Son. Oh dear Odd was so lonely he started talking to himself even more as well as giant inanimate lightbulbs
<littledarkpoetII> Alcar: so sayeth the Liber Congruous

The best thing about England is that you can see all the major sites in a couple of days drive from where you're situated :)

<Tech-Sensei> afk : Away F***ing Kittens
<Dungeon_Master_M> Ok, Tech... you have some serious problems
<Tech-Sensei> i object to that statement
<Tech-Sensei> "SOME" serious problems?
<Tech-Sensei> i think yer underemphasising

The joy of the military. "YOU! Tha's right, YOU! have the joy of knowing YOUR weapon was made by the lowest bidder!"

<qwerty> you know... I never really thought the debating skills that I've learned in this channel would be any particular good in real life... rather just being a side-effect of looking for Answers(tm). Until I went today to buy a car :-/
<Jestarius> did you type lol, afk and brb?
<yetifemme> did you threaten to hax0r his |336 self?
* qwerty didn't even refer to himself in the third person ;-)

children cause child molesters

<TrAmBieNCe> hmm . . well . . i'm not catholic
<qwerty> TrAmBieNCe: how do you know?
<TrAmBieNCe> how do i know i'm not catholic?
<qwerty> TrAmBieNCe: yeah
<TrAmBieNCe> because i know . . . what do you mean?
<qwerty> TrAmBieNCe: HOW do you know?

(Quit: "I tried to commit suicide by sticking my head in the oven, but there was a cake in it." -Lesley Boone)

pain fumes make me the fine upstanding siticin I am to day

<yetifemme> there is a town called dildo in newfoundland
<TanCig> what do you call people who live there?
<Kattelyn> tan, happy
<Kattelyn> very very happy

There's a town in Missouri called Tightwad.....people from all over bank from there so they can have "First Bank of Tightwad" on their checks....

(Quit: Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but people don't point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is?)

There's a Klingon PROGRAMMING Language??

* Alcar is coming to the tentative convlusion that the only reason people don't kill themselves is because thye think it could always be worse. The Job complex, or something ... or perhaps to live for others, in a way, to not let them down. Both of which seem to counter the idea that people are 99% selfish.
<Mindal> Alcar: tentative convulsion? Now There's an oxymoron for the record books.
<Mindal> Not to mention hard to pull off

I've always disliked cats... even when I had self-confidence.

not many poeple enjoy having acne

I think I'm the only female in existence that can get fully showered, dressed, makeup, and hair in 20 min

<Gedit> alcohol is a depressant, is toxic to the human body, and kills brain cells .. but whatever floats your boat ;)
<|Judy|> Gedit: If I had a boat, alky would be one of the things that would float it.

<ServantStCelestis> thehidden: i agree that alcohol is an intoxicant... but intoxication, in moderation, is fun... and its the coolest drug of all, because its not just a drug, its a fine drink... you have wine critics, but you don't get any LSD critics, or heroin critics, or anything like that... alcohol is far more multidimensional, multisensual...
<Alcar> lsd critics... *thinks* "So, is that 5 pink spiders dancing over the ceiling or 4? Come now, stop gibbering. We need to rate this!"

Ah sweet suffering, as joyful as the sounds of a bonesaw in the night, so many pleasures, so little time to reap them.

(Quit: "The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy." -Martin Luther King, Jr. [If you have contact with Sharone, Arafat or Bush, remind them])

Hitler may have been a great man, but he was not a good man

Newton died a virgin that was his greatest achivement

<DownCore> I want to live foreevr
<|337C4Bb4g3> DownCore: Would you settle for dying forever?
<DownCore> no

We were all virgins at one time or another.

It occurs to me that those who wnat immortality ultimately have a fear of living, and don't know what to do with the life they have got, secondly Intellect isn't the measure of an individual.... and to me a higher state of understanding means that you don't make distinctions between yourself and other people and you don't discriminate

I repent, I'm SOO Sorry for being born upon this Earth, and for living my life, and reacting to the conditions given to me in the way which was destined for me to do. I'm sorry for learning whatever lesson it is I was supposed to learn, and most of all, I'm sorry if I didn't fit into your plan as perfectly as I was supposed, to. I'm sorry...for being an overly egotistical hairless monkey with an opposable thumb

gender is between your ears, sex is between your legs ;b

"By order of the POEEEEEEEEEE, all discordians are henceforth prohibited from being discordian"

i cant believe the q.mum died, and im a thousand miles away from home........I MISSED A BLOODY 'DAY OFF' FROM WORK!!!!!!!!

<mcnicoll> bear in mind that the queen mum has been a kept woman since the day she was born, she never had to work or worry about how she was going to feed her family or keep a roof over her head, because people who did work and paid taxes funded her, whether they liked it or not
<mcnicoll> therefore, it's hard to be terribly upset over her passing

The fact that I choose not to mouth empty platitudes about loving everyone doesn't make me a bad person

<AlcarGM> July 13th Feast of St. Margaret of Anitoch - Margaret promised that anyone who invoked her name on his or her deathbed would be spared the torments of Hell. The deal was called off with the suppression of her cult by the Vatican in 1969. This is when the Orthodox Church remembers her.
<AlcarGM> July 20th Feast of St. Margaret of Anitoch - This is when the Roman Catholic Church used to honor St. Margaret. See July 13.

<Mindal> Bad man!
<|337C4Bb4g3> Mindal: Where?!
* AlcarGM tries to look innocent again
* AlcarGM tries bambi eyes...
* AlcarGM wonders if Bambi wants them back

Myth is more real than reality, it transcends reality.. all that we see around us are symbols alluding to a higher existence

"It touches me. It touches me right on the gag reflex."

I've got Parkinson's disease. And he's got mine.

The downside of being better than everyone else is that people tend to assume you're pretentious.

I always admit when I'm wrong... It just hasn't happened yet.

Every dark cloud has a silver lining, but lightening kills thousands of people every year who are looking for it.

Incompetence: When you earnestly believe you can compensate for a lack of skill by doubling your efforts, there's no end to what you can't do.

Conclusion: Where you are when you get tired of thinking.

Consulting: If you're not a part of the solution, there's good money to be made in prolonging the problem.

Lysdexia isn't a lobprem!

Take your wife out tonight. One bullet ought to do.

Jesus saves souls and redeems them for valuable cash prizes.

maybe instead of being afraid of being killed, you should be happy every day that you aren't killed

Man is a wonderful creature; he sees through the layers of fat (eyes), hears through a bone (ears) and speaks through a lump of flesh (tongue).

im in a famous band that will be famous 1 day

i'm realistic. i don't hate the average member of the human race for being idiotic, i merely look down at them.

I know a couple of guys who can talk on the phone for hours, and they're not gay.

(Quit: I am a man, the world is my urinal)

could you deflate your ego, the rest of this in this room need some air to breathe

if you get a grant to study a theory, you want to prove the theory true...failure isn't always an option

When one of the primary criteria for determining the quality of a theorem is how accurately it reflects experimentally quantifiable reality, it seems quite silly to then be surprised that a good theorem accurately reflects experimentally quantifiable reality, and take that to mean that the theorem is a direct representation of the way in which the universe functions at a fundamental level.

<skorpius> the superficiality of the masses doesn't make a word meaningless
<Avatara> the pomposity of the elite don't make it meaningful either, skorpius

<Calcified> what makes it evolve the same lifeform into a bird and yet also a cow?
<Alcar> Someone misfiling blueprints.

Truth is not a tiger that strikes in the night, but a rabbit that farts after eating too many radishes!

the quran does not say what islam stands for. muslims actions say what islam stands for

<popk> i need help on starting my own religion so i can get some money
<|337C4Bb4g3> popk: You and me, both!
<coca_cola_sniffer> study scientology :/
<popk> what's scientology?
<Nevaeh> popk the study of Scientists *nods* ;)

when the supercomputer known as God malfunctions, armagedeon will come, but the question is, will the computer malfunction, or will God awaken, or will we come to realize that we are all brains in jars in some twisted civilizations museums ?

Women were made from ribs. Its why women are so tasty.

I get headaches because my brain is a lazy asshole, and thinks that it can control me by threat of migraines.

* requiemforachild is currently thinking Florida is the root of all chaos in the universe
* requiemforachild is developing this and thinks it very plausible

* requiemforachild came up with an ingenius idea... to go around each world high milatry installation and paint all those red button green... so when they go to launch the nuclear weapons they can't find em

<DownCore> I use logic not emotion, and logic does not allow for love
<|337C4Bb4g3> So what kinds of medication are you on?
<DownCore> none
<|337C4Bb4g3): paxil, risperidone, and lithium would be my guess
<|337C4Bb4g3> Hey, it's ok, man!
<|337C4Bb4g3> You can be honest here!
<|337C4Bb4g3> It's the internet!

<requiemforachild> the 23rd state is Maine the 32nd state is Minnesota... both beginning with M's
* requiemforachild thinks evil doings are afoot
<requiemforachild> there is I tell you, there is... they are lying to us again
<requiemforachild> *squint his eyes* just like they did during the Clinton presidency
<requiemforachild> they neglected to tell us they were calling him home

(Quit: it's been said that if all of Christianity vanished, the Sermon on the Mount would suffice to reconstruct it entire. Likewise, if all of Buddhism vanished, the Clint Eastwood Sutra of the Zen Masters Gorillaz would suffice to reconstruct it entire)

<requiemforachild> sigma6_: personally I am not striving to enlightenment
<|337C4Bb4g3> you'll never find enlightenment while striving for it ;b
<Bolognaus> you must let it come to you!
<Bolognaus> just post directions to your house on the internet
<Bolognaus> eventually enlightenment will get there

"Monotheistic religion has always brought out the best in us humans; thank you so much for the idea of a vengeful supernatural entity who rewards people in the afterlife!"

<AlcarGM> Random Topic: Is sex a religious issue?
<Kiirn> AlcarGM: All I really wanted to do was get to know you in the biblical sense :P

<Kattelyn> I would like to know why there got to be such a stigma attached with enjoying yourself though
<Kattelyn> any ideas?
<Kiirn> Kattelyn: You just answered the question.
<Kiirn> "enjoying yourself"

(Quit: Zaza misa say JarJar ownz j00)

It makes sense to follow your heart and find spirituality in life - rather than to follow a set of rules made up in another place and time which don't really call to you - Forest`

i even avoid telling my friends about irc... i would feel guilty if they got hooked

psychopaths are probably better off in a dogmatic religion which sets guidelines for them

If Truth is not a person, then you must know what it is?

The Catholic Church writes more rituals than Stephen King writes books.

Living in society is prostituting your 'self' to the world.

Life is like a box of chocolates, it's solitary vector along a parallel identity crisis

Jon Stewart had a great line at the Grammy awards about how the Afghani people burst into the streets when the Taliban fell and listened to music for the first time in a decade. And 3 days later, even they were tired of Creed

Being loyal to Jesus back then required giving up everything, living as a poor person and helping those in need. Now it requires a fish emblem on your car and being an op in a chat room.

"Principles only mean something if you stick by them when they're inconvenient."

Im not going to prison for idiots on irc.

I sometimes wonder if the world would be a better place if texas had remained a republic

it's a good thing that I was so meek and inneffectual in high school. otherwise Columbine would have been in my town. =<

you just pretend to hate me.

* Eltanan classifies Jocks along with 'Lawyers' and 'Politicians'. If we ever decide to get rid of the useless third of our population by jettisoning them into space, they'd be on the list.

<WarezBert> high school is too easy imo
<Baliadoc> i try not to be depressed by it. I try to keep faith in general human laziness.
<WarezBert> it should be run more like a military installation
<WarezBert> random hazings, beatings for bad grades
<WarezBert> i bet we would all fit better into a competitive evil society after that :p
<Baliadoc> why do we need a competitive evil society??
<Alcar> bali - Dunno. We have it anyway :)

most cool things these days are disturbing. Look at humor on cable TV

3 green dingos invading an encampment only count as a single winged kangaroo.

(Quit: "Santa's laughter mocks the poor.")

this is a delicate experiment testing how much inane drivil the human mind can endure. now hush before you skew the results :)

* Eltanan doesn't think he's ever been a viking.
<Kattelyn> if I ever was I was the weird old lady out in the wood that put people back together and saw their fortunes and you scared children with.

<Warner> don't underestimate juveniles. They can blow up schools with hardware made from spare parts :)
<Eltanan> that's not hard. anyone could do that.
<WarezBert> its only amazing when you make a list of what they CANT do

Preachers get all the benefits of priests, but they can have sex.

people decide their vocations? Neat. What a concept. I always thought advanced vocations meant going to school, not being able to get a job, and finally working as a wageslave in some godsforsaken factory just to pay off college loans. Seems to be heading that way here.

That's the problem with the world. Everyone plays war because the rules for Peace are so complicated.

<Nevaeh> ...I hope he'll be back..
<Nevaeh> I was only playing
<Nevaeh> *frets*
<AlcarGM> Yeah, sure, Nevaeh! I bet thats what God said when He planted that apple tree, too!

<skorpius> the "free internet" is dead
<aslhk> skorpius: that's not true =P you can host your own e-mail server for free

<skorpius> spam is becoming an art
<yetifemme> modern art
<Qworg> i got one from a supposed ex-minister of the Chile'ian government asking me to 'launder' for him a foreign investor or something like that

Cthulag for Dalnet ircop

One hand clapping sounds alot like one hand shaking a baby.

<Strater> i don't care to defend celibacy, but i can see how it might be a tool, or an aid to contemplations
* Alcar doesn't see how it can aid in contemplations. Imo, that was a myth invented by people not getting any.

sometimes it seems the majority of the world is crippled in ignorance and the rest paralyzed by materialism (another ignorance). you may as well deny the night to get a tan

this place is so much better than reality. but gawd its just as stressful. its like a over dramatised sitcom.

"The only free people are the ones you can get with a coke and a hamburger." - the great yeti

<pearlsinvinegar> ive never really had a problem with writing too little.. rather too much, i wish i could be more concise and less wordy
<|337C4Bb4g3> pearlsinvinegar: No.
<yetifemme> see, all you really need is two letters and some punc-cher-a-shun

"the measure of man isn't the word he speaks, for time changes the tongue, the measure of a man is the stories he pens, and the orisons to memory sung"

<dfdgfdg> why did the twin towers really came down
<dfdgfdg> when u read the story about babalon how ever u spell it
<dfdgfdg> u will see that Allah has something against high buildings

who is the idol worshipper? One who walks by a building or one who blows it up? the bomber of course

"How would you like your eggs in the morning, scrambled or fertilized?"

you're so evil, you fulfill your own dreams but not others'

If God doesn't destroy Las Vegas, he owes Sodom and Gommorah an apology

ya know, some catholics say you can't waste sperm. Does that mean that if you're jerkin off, you have to go find a girl and shove it all in?

<|337C4Bb4g3> Wait... all stupid people WILL die
<Forest`> hmm, but if that happens, who will do all the distasteful jobs we need to have done?
<AlcarGM> Fores - children. :p
<Forest`> AlcarGM! you sound like my parents!

Tanning beds are really bad for you. Why don't you smoke while bathing in lye and eating sacchirine instead?

Sex doesn't produce guilt. Girlfriends produce guilt.

only guys that play with explosives they read up about on the net!

i am celibate, and don't like your feelings about sex ;b

I'm confused about everything, why should death be any different?

*** Agnium_Protector-III Quit (Quit: those who cheat always get what they deserve in the end)
<Gemm> yes, a win

<Kattelyn> TheShrike, what I find so intresting is that we have so many people on here who can't take things for face value. They must research, learn, and make up their own minds.
<TheShrike> Kattelyn, it's interesting, and a good sign... problem is, nowadays, it's a major chore to try to break through the vast amounts of bullshit that surrounds controversial topics. Very few people are interested in 'truth' objectively, just 'truth' as it conforms to their world view :/ Of course, truth, if you ask me, is really very subjective. Makes everything complex.

<StarChild`-> in my day, we were lucky if we got 4 hours of sleep a night! and we liked it!
<Alcar> Well, in my day each day lasted 25 hours! And that was so we could get one hour of sleep!
<Keith`> "Back in my day the saying was I'll sleep when i'm dead, and we would go months with no more then 10 minets of sleep that we got while behind the wheel no less!"
<aslhk> back in my day they were like, "You should sleep a minimum of 8 hours a night."
<aslhk> I was like, "BS, yo! BS! I ain't never slept, and look at me!", at which point I died of a heart attack
<aslhk> the poor karma which resulted from my failure to champion the virtues of a proper sleeping schedule resulted in me being reincarnated as a cs major

<Mirr0rMage> My new lifetime goal. I will be insane before I'm 30. Well, clinically.
<FuriKuri> That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard in my life

<Mirr0rMage> I loathe optimists.
<FuriKuri> Why?
<Mirr0rMage> My outlook on life is pretty good, I think. The world is an absolutely infuriating place, and I think getting seethingly mad about it all is a perfectly valid response.
<Adwyn> optimists suffer the insane delusion that the universe isn't out to kill them and is a nice place.
* Adwyn has never understood it.
<Mirr0rMage> Adwyn: Exactly!
<FuriKuri> Who are you to judge that the would is a suffering place?
<Maryn> Not suffering...insufferable!

<Ryft> TheShrike: Jesus is a stalker now?
<TheShrike> Ryft, well, he *is* said to be everywhere... all I know is I am filing for a restraining order

(Quit: "The reason to why most divorce is quite simple. Marriage." - Ryft)

"Whoever argues for a restoration of values is sooner or later met with the objection that one cannot return, or as the phrase is likely to be, "you can't turn the clock back." By thus assuming we are prisoners of the moment, the objection well reveals the philosophic position of modernism. The believer in truth, on the other hand, is bound to maintain that the things of highest value are not affected by the passage of time; otherwise the very concept of truth becomes impossible."
- Richard M. Weaver, Ideas Have Consequences

(Quit: If you give a man a fish, he will eat for a day, if you teach a man to fish, he will buy an ugly hat. If you talk to a starving man about fish your a consultant)

* Alcar thinks we give the media too much credit :P
<Alcar> Or blame
<Alcar> We'd rather blame a faceless media than ourselves
<DJ^Krush> Alcar: when the you've got a cathode ray surrogant caregiver, you can't ignore the potential influence :)

<Kattelyn> as people moved away from home, spread out, and got kids, they couldn't have as close of a connection as they did when everybody lived close to each other.
<Kattelyn> as this progressed, more and more selfishness and self sufficiency was needed to replace the closeness of the family..

(Quit: The smart way to keep people passive and obedient is to strictly limit the spectrum of acceptable opinion, but allow very lively debate within that spectrum - even encourage the more critical and dissident views. That gives people the sense that there's free)

so what good is it to say we are all part of a whole when all it means is that we are seperate!?

One man's religion is another man's belly laugh

You're so cute when you're homophobic.

as my 14 year old son put it when he went to his first pagan gathering at a nudist resort, "the big ladies look just like the goddess!"

"If the human brain was so simple that we could understand it, we'd be too simple to understand it."

<Tonitrus> Well... They're attractive.
<Tonitrus> Some human females.
<Tonitrus> It's like an advertisement for a car you really want but can't afford.
<Tonitrus> That comes with certain features you really don't want.

Hey, that reminds me of when a freind of mine had his quad-runner stolen..He told NO-ONE. Then waited...Later another friend turned up and said "SO? did you ever find out who stole your quad-runner?" Then he said "I just did."

"One day can weigh down everything someone posseses and has done; or raise it up again" -Sophocles

I had a thought tonight. Is God considered a starving artist? He doesn't get paid...

If Earthbound spirits are unaware of their death, they're pretty much obvlivous to everything else as well

I read my horoscope today and it said you will hear about violence in the middle east soon. how did they know?! i doubted astrology before, but after such conclusive evidince....

<Kristin_Hartnett> seriously, it says I'm waiting for some fairy tale romance and I'm attracted to extremyl good looking men.
<|337C4Bb4g3> Kristin_Hartnett: That's true of what, every heterosexual female in the country, just about?
<Kristin_Hartnett> |337C4Bb4g3, no not really. Some of my friends are attracted to some ugly dudes.
<StCynic> Kristin_Hartnett: can you give them my number?

My standards are so high I'll never find anybody.

rap is so under appreciated it saddens me

Two vultures board an airplane, each carrying two dead raccoons. The stewardess looks at them and says, "I'm sorry, gentlemen, only one carrion allowed per passenger."

the day I stop smoking is the day I start getting healthy

The nonstop, rambling, incoherent prophesies of doom foretold by religious wackos who interpret "overcast skies with a 40% chance of rain" as meaning "REPENT FOR YOU WILL ALL PERISH WHEN GOD'S HOLY ASSAULT RIFLE BLASTS A FEW HUNDRED ROUNDS INTO YOUR RAVENOUS GUT!!!" Of course these guys don't actually come out and say that; they choose to spread their message over approximately 50,000 pages of text that highlight random words such as "JESUS," "SIN"

"Blasphemer! How can you deny the AWESOME power that is Chansev? Can you not feel how it affects YOUR life? Are you blind to its power? Open your hearts and receive the TRUTH! Open your eyes and see! Open your ears and know! Open your wallet and pay me money! The truth will set you FREE, my children!"

(Quit: You will only become what you are becoming right now.)

(Quit: ... and there he was, maybe in another time, maybe another place.. would I recognize him? Probably not. Thats meaningless to think of... and yet all there is, is to think of it. Another life maybe.)

<Adwyn> actually, its mostly me and low end tech. I worked at a place were we had to nail skids together to put window frames etc. on. It took me over 2 hours to nail one skid together :p
<Adwyn> Adwyn + hammer + nails != anothing useful.
<Warner> skid are those things forklifts move stuff around on?
<Adwyn> Yeah
<Warner> ah, we americans, or at least us Utahans call those things palets :)
<Adwyn> the ones we used couldn't be dignified by that term :p
<Warner> at first I was sitting here trying to imagine why window frames need the same kind of skids a helecopter has :)

(Quit: Born of the Earth, we weren't given a choice. What about free will? Do we have a choice? See them run in place, in the human rat race. So much dead weight, to our disgrace. Life begins when you accept your fate. - Shattered Faith, Bad Religion)

there is no american way. it died in 1776

<|337C4Bb4g3> the logic makes no sense to me, but he is obviously so far beyond we mere mortals that he is no longer constrained by the boundaries of mere reason, logic, or common sense
<Alcar> but he is obviously so far beyond we mere mortals that he is no longer constrained by the boundaries of mere reason, logic, or common sense == Human :p
<|337C4Bb4g3> Alcar: man, that was harsh... I dunno if I'd go THAT far =)

definition of religion: being hung over sunday morning with all your hypocrites, er, friends.

(Quit: I would like the world to know that my life is the single largest mistake for anything god ever thought up, and that God should never have made humans. because all we do is hurt each other. Over and over again. we never learn do we? when will it end? I hope that it end soon.)

<|337C4Bb4g3> self-control is overrated ;b
<|337C4Bb4g3> you should be able to never let anything get to the point where you HAVE to control it ;b
<Bolognaus> |337: except nuclear fission.
<|337C4Bb4g3> Bolognaus: ESPECIALLY nuclear fission

sex isn't a relationship its a physical act

We do things for animals we wouldnt' do for people. If one of your family members took a dump on the front lawn, would you go clean it up?

(Quit: Try not to let your mind wander, It's much to small to be outside by itself.....)

if a boss kisses his secretary, and ends up with her gum in his mouth, is it still just sexual harrassment? or is it also larceny...

if you want to feel britney spears' breasts, go to a plastic surgeon. he will give you a pair of your own.

Im....losing my mind.....I could have swore I just saw a pop up appear reading "SELL YOUR SOUL" and then blink away....

I'd prefer to eat animal rights activists, to be honest.

it is my opinion that people who hold animal's lifes in higher value than human's have something amiss with them :)

V:tm it's d&d, except it's modern earth and you have to act really angsty. Sort of like "Woe! Woe! I am undead! Woe is me!" *humans come, to kill you and end your life. You slaughter them all* 'No! I have killed! Woe is me!"

I'm a grad student so I certainly do not qualify as being sane

You can't be a mad scientist without requiring a few skin grafts.

You be the Dairy Queen and I'll be your Burger King: You treat me right, and I'll do it your way

I think I could fall madly in bed with you.

<StCynic> I've had quite a bit to drink, and you're beginning to look pretty good.
<Quiddity> THAT is not a pickup line. That is the unspoken truth.

If this bar is a meat market, you must be the prime rib.

You're ugly but you intrigue me.

I may not be the best looking guy here, but I'm the only one talking to you.

(Quit: "We are not God. Not only are our powers limited, we are sometimes drivin to become the devil himself"- Wolfwood)

"We're going to resolve this fight by you, Daryl, telling Kris his idea is perfectly sound even though it is completely stupid and will cost the company 300K. As a result, Daryl's pent up anger will lead to him coming to work and shooting Kris before the project is due - along with most of the s4taff - saving the company both a failed project and having to pay less wages.... Yes?"

<Alcar> Seriously tho leet, I dunno .... ino, most resolution is just kicking the person out of the group - or whatever - who is least liked.
<Alcar> Tell them no conflict can be resolved. Show them news clipping from the middle east.

Tell me something, do you have something against proper use of language, and intelligent discourse, or do you simply enjoy sounding like an idiot?

Science has been getting in the way of science for years, isn't it about time religion had another chance?

(Quit: It took 5 years but I finally achieved my goal. I organized my bookmarks!)

wrestling... guy's version of a soap opera

<o____o> Bible verse of the day is James 4:4
<o____o> -James 4:4 - You adulterous people, don't you know that friendship with the world is hatred toward God? Anyone who chooses to be a friend of the world becomes an enemy of God. (niv)
<o____o> Happy Earth Day

<Deacon_Frost999> and morals seem to be linked in MOST cases to religion
<mysterywhiteboy> that's because people lack moral imagination

<|337C4Bb4g3> leviticus 20:13 - And if a man lie with mankind, as with womankind, both of them have committed abomination: they shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them.
<Forest`> gee thanks cabbage :P
<|337C4Bb4g3> Forest`: It's in the bible ;b
<|337C4Bb4g3> Not like I made it up
<Forest`> its not like enough people haven't already found that passage
<|337C4Bb4g3> Or like I advocate it
<|337C4Bb4g3> Forest`: More people need to find the one that says "Thou shalt not kill, fuckhead"

The God of atheism. The Invisible Pink Fluctuation. :)

the two most abundant things in the universe are hydrogen and human idiocy

(Quit: Teeny: Chrissy, truth or dare? Chrissy: Truth. Teeny: Have you ever been french kissed? Chrissy: Are you kidding? I don't want to get pregnant!)

all of science is a joke if you go looking for irrefutable facts

<Tonitrus> I'm pretty obstinate, actually. It takes quite a bit to convince me that I have anything, and then quite a bit more to care.
<christy> are you sure? denial of having hypochondria might be a sign of hypochondria o_o
<Tonitrus> If I had hypochondria, I'd be saying "Oh, my God! I might have hypochondria!"

I reserve my shame mostly for other bestowing upon other people. seems to be that that is where it belongs most of the time

Sometimes prayer seems to me to be nothing more than trying to deny the reality that life isn't fair...

#christian was hardly representative of Christianity. I see your point, but then again I've a seen a sharper edge on a baseball.

silly humans, idealism is for gods

Pantheism is only a polite form of atheism.

Pantheists are basically humanists who like flowers rather than math.

(Quit: Every problem in the universe can be solved by finding the right long-haired prettyboy and beating the crap out of him.)

I'm hear to start my artificial religion to saved the already damned

Dictionaries suck. They try to dictate how you use words. I'll use my words however I bloody well like.

<Tonitrus> Enough garlic will deter anything.
<Tonitrus> Undead, demonic, or otherwise.
<Alcar> "Well, you see officer. I was trying to deter vampires and I had lots of garlic. When I got up that evening, my entire family were vampires! They all ran away from me. So naturally I had to stake them all."

guy walks into a bar and asks for a shot of tequila, bartender goes "whats wrong?" guy goes "I just found out my son is queer". same guy walks in a couple of days later, asks for two shots of tequila, bartender goes "whats wrong?" guy goes "I just found out my other son is queer" same guy walks in a day later, bartender goes "anybody in your family like pussy?" guy goes "yeah, my wife"

A guy walks into a bar with an octopus. He sits the octopus down on a stool and tells everyone in the bar that this is a very talented octopus. He can play any musical instrument in the world. He hears everyone in the crowd laughing at him, calling him an idiot, etc. So he says that he will wager $50 to anyone who has an instrument that the octopus can't play. A guy walks up with a guitar and sits it beside the octopus. The octopus starts playing better
than Dizzie Gillespie. So the man pays his $50. A third guy walks up with bagpipes. He sits them down and the octopus fumbles with it for a minute and sits it down with a confused look. "Ha!" the man says. "Can't you play it?" The octopus looks up at the man and says, "Play it? I'm going to screw it as soon as I figure out how to get its pajamas off."

You're speaking borderline-madness-meets-intelligence. That's my native language.

most people do very little consciously. they just sort of wander through life in a sort of mindless daze =) explains a lot, eh? ;b

I was really disconcerted when I read through this list of personality disorders. There are about 2 that I can definately say I don't have. And I know I have the paranoid personality disorder. I can tell by the fact that I'm thinking about it. :)

do babies get online nicks too?

<Alcar> Heck, anyone can disprove of a god. Disproving the entire *Idea* of a God/Creative force on the other hand, is effectively not possible I think.
<m1lkman> alcar so just because you can't prove he isn't there, makes him real?
<Alcar> m1lkman - What he? I'm speaking of the idea of a creative force behind the universe/life, not a sexually repressed old man up in a cloud.

The greatest trick of the Devil was convincing everyone he is God.

The greatest trick of the Devil was convincing people he existed at all - Alcar :p

Bear in mind i'm an ethicless bastard who is in journalism because once you estabish yourself and don't fuck up, you've got a job for life

<DJ^Krush> I believe that the world, the universe - is a sad place, perhaps intrinsically sad and that I prefer to find real beauty that is in abundance and not superficial
<Forest`> DJ^Krush are you one of those goth people?

I'm not entirely sure how I am at the moment. I've stopped speaking to myself.

<Tonitrus> Pregnancy is a nasty disease. I'm glad you got over it.
<Alcar> It's not nasty. It's a good weight loss program :P "I used ot think I was fat, then I got pregnant."

Life is a sexually tranmitted disease that is alway fatal

the boomerang is not stupid.

(Quit: Connection reset by God)

<cyber_satan> i say that we all boycott the roman catholic church until they get this deal with thier priest resolved'
<christy> how do you propose to boycott the catholic church?!
<Mindal> Kill em all :P

<christy> will you buy a pope t-shirt that says "stop raping kids for cash"?
<christy> wait, that's confusing
<christy> it leaves open the possibility that the t-shirt wants you to start raping kids for free

there is no god, but allah has mohammed as his prophet

(Quit: Hi, I'm a quit message virus. Please replace your old line with this line and help me take over the world of IRC :)

<Eltanan> any truth that can be stated is not a truth.
<Mindal> Eltanan: Great contradiction you just made.
<Eltanan> thanks!
<aslhk> Eltanan: Nothing is certain; not even this.

If there IS one system that rules the universe, all dimensions included, the whole shebang, do you really think any human-interpreted system could possibly do it justice?

<jbc> SEE your ENEMIES *ROAST* in the fires of HELL!
<jbc> There's no time to lose - call NOW, or be tortured with fire forever!
<jbc> As a special bonus, if you sign up six new mambers this week, you'll be TWICE AS SAVED!

<Ryft> Had this young college aged chick working at the jobsite today. At the safety meeting this morning, I imagine she felt all 30 pairs of eyes taking her in. Poor girl. The only female on the whole site, and a pretty college girl at that. I wonder if she'll dare to come back?
<jbc> when in a position like that, gain her confidence by pretending to be gay
<jbc> hey, it works on TV

Dogs have masters. Cats have staff.

"Jesus can love me all he wants, but he is dead, so I wont love him back for fear of legal action!"

<A0CompHelp> Does anyone know AMerican History well?
<Nevaeh> A0CompHelp.. pfft we're all Americans..
<Nevaeh> so.. of course.. we.. :/ don't.

(Quit: "There never was more than one christian, and he died on the cross.")

fortunately, IQ points cannot be redeemed for valuable prizes, or anything useful like that

its not whether she spits or swallows, but whether she belches afterwards.

<|337C4Bb4g3> god is a troll
<|337C4Bb4g3> he sent jesus
<|337C4Bb4g3> so he could troll us
<|337C4Bb4g3> it's in the bible
<|337C4Bb4g3> on the gates of heaven
<|337C4Bb4g3> there is a sign
<|337C4Bb4g3> it says: "You have been trolled. You have lost. Have a nice day."

It's my morals that prevent me from getting laid. Well, that, and my complete lack of social skills, good looks, money, and all of the other things that would allow the opportunity to present itself.

You may not always be able to control your environment, but you can ALWAYS control your reaction to your environment. Look at masochists for a good example of just how far this can do

Spank a child with a Holy Book. That way, they get punished AND can learn it via osmosis!

* ^Kit^ 's sexual preference is.. um.. often :/

but my thought was, "why limit myself to having such a relation with half the population? I mean, if it's that important and that special... shouldn't I have as many choices and options as possible?"

i dont believe in god because i dont know the meaning of the word god

So I figured people will make up anything to justify beliefs. *shrugs* If you can't change reality, you can at least lie to yourself to try and live with it.

* jbc never slept more than an hour at most until he was about 8 years old
<jbc> I aged my parents about 15 years ;)

Think of god as a beautiful diamond, multifaceted, shining in the light. Even both eyes in your head cannot see the exact same image of that god, so how can two people see the exact same thing?

<Kattelyn> *smirk* how old do you think I am
<Kattelyn> just curious
<Alcar> Ooooh, loaded question!
<JellyBelly1605> No clue really.....
<Alcar> quick, fake computer troubles JellyBelly :p

* Alcar thinks the fact that people even EAT McDonalds is probably the worlds most awe inspiring act of marketing.

* Qworg would rather believe in santa than god, oddly enough...
<abcmonkee> at least santa wont cast you into a burnin hell, i guess
<jbc> maybe the lump of coal is just a really lazy half-measure... "oh, go set fire to yourself. Here, use this."

santa doesnt like me... instead of dropping down the chimney to deliver presents, his reindeer just drop 'presents' down my chimney. guess putting x-lax in milk, and chocolate covered amphetamines in cookies isnt a funny idea after all.

"If I do not believe enough in God to go to Heaven what happens if I do not believe enough in Satan?" - Anonymous

* WarezBert interprets the bible as the first attempt at epic fiction

* WarezBert ponders a much more interesting movie, with merry poppins as a dominatrix ;)
<Alcar> "NO! Not the big umbrella! Don't open .. Argghh!"
<Caltak> "Wow, she had a rack and an iron maiden in that handbag!"

you know, the worst drivers in the world are the ones who cause all the accidents and never get in them

Confusion: A hungry baby in a topless bar

You know sometimes I get the sudden urge to run around naked. But then I just drink some Windex. It keeps me from streaking!

I cna ytpe 300 wrods pre mniuet!

I was an atheist until I realized I was GOD

Here's the deal though: Zoloft won't make you happy. It won't help make you happy. It will do slightly less than jack for you. It's like taking asprin for cancer.

he was never really seriously considered as a candidate for Kingship until he got it

i've watched 325 gigs of anime. I speak conversational japaneese.

<StCynic> Ebert gave it a thumbs down because he didn't find the special effects to be "realistic". He mentioned a scene where Spiderman caught a trolley in his web and he said that you didn't get the idea that it was actually suspended in the web, it didn't look heavy enough
<StCynic> To which the obvious reply is, "it's a fucking COMIC BOOK"
<StCynic> THIS is the point at which you demand realism, for crying out loud?

<Alyosha`> Only pets go to heaven. Otherwise it would be pretty crowded, and besides, who really wants aphids and salamanders in heaven?
<Alcar> Who really wants humans to? :p Not the rest of this world, I'd bet...
<Alcar> "I'm sorry, the Passenger Pigeons have you humans out-voted. You're not allowed in. Oh, yes, and the chickens want a word with that Saunders fellow..."

The very idea of celebrating my 3,742,986,329th birthday is horrendous.

what are fake bacon bits made of?

<James_Valentine> I know the heimlich but I do it naked...
<AlcarGM> Does that induce choking? :)

<Tonitrus> I.e., supposing that I (God-forbid) actually did something stupid, or made myself look stupid, how long should it, theoretically, take to be forgotten?
<Eltanan> Forgotten= 4.7 billion years, give or take. Forgiven= about 5 seconds.

<Tonitrus> What do I have to write about? I had dinner with Cthulu yesterday, but little else of interest has happened.
<Eltanan> What did you eat?
<Tonitrus> Eltanan: I'm not sure, but it kept screaming.

* Eltanan nods. Railgun must be exercised, or Railgun gets antsy.
* Tonitrus nods.
<Tonitrus> That's what I tried to tell the police...

<Tonitrus> Insanity is a doorway to a better place...
<Eltanan> I see it more as a high-speed interdimensional trans-rail netowrk than a door.

<Vard`> Random Topic: Assuming there is a god, why was creation made then?
<TheShrike> Vard`, I dunno... the platypus points to the fact that the Creator was either 1) bored, 2) has a great sense of humor, or 3) zonked out of his/her/its/their gourd

Speculating what things are like 'outside of time' is asking for a migraine.

The more you insult those around you, the lower you seem compared to them

<StCynic> I hate it when you buy a woman perfume and she won't wear it
<Kattelyn> bloody hell. skip the perfume, buy me a new video card.

<Alcar> Humans are insane. And irrational. At least 90% of the time :p
<|337C4Bb4g3> Alcar: Humans are insane and irrational 110% of the time
* Alcar was trying to be optimistic in spite of the evidence, |337C4Bb4g3
<|337C4Bb4g3> Alcar: How irrational!

i want a midget that pretends like he's a lawn gnome

"Genius consists of the ability to summon up childhood at will"

If we're in the dark ages now, then we've always been there.

<|Judy|> I'm not pregnant anymore :)
<SloopJoy> anymore?????

Straight A students? Shows how smart they are! If they were smart, they'd know not to bother!

"So, Mr . .God is it. You claim to make the world, but there is this interesting 4 billion year odd gap between when you made it and people realised you did. I was wondering if you could explain this hole in your resume?"

<StCynic> n the beginning, the procreative agent (hereinafter referred to as God) did bring forth the heavens and the earth, inclusive of all easements, encroachments and improvements to said parcel pursuant to the aforementioned regulations
<Dry-ice> StCynic: ?
<StCynic> Dry-ice: that would be the legalese translation of Genesis 1:1

<fourcreatures> but if the bible is true as i believe it is then you people here who dont believe it are in the crap when you die and you will spend eternity in hell with the devil and his demons forever and ever i would like to spare you that but ohh well what can i do?i have done all i can in love its been good talking to you though
<^Khelben^> fc... and if you're wrong?
<fourcreatures> if i am wrong i dunno
<fourcreatures> you people would certainly want me dead for lying to you

"Jesus was a man... a good man... a great man... but still just a man" - Anonymous

<Dry-ice> Kattelyn: I was rased baptist... it that why I think jesus in't god ?
<bnyfoofoo> Dry-ice, baptists teach Jesus is God
<bnyfoofoo> you must have missed that lesson?

(Quit: no one is a virgin, life f*cks us all)

Kinda sad when the most user-friendly device in the OS is the Close Program box.

<jbc> hollywood could seccede
<jbc> now that is one scary idea
<Whheeee> No, it's a bad idea
<Whheeee> The US doesn't show many foreign films :)
<jbc> wow, imagine the trade deficit the US would accrue

<jbc> as an atheist, the very fact that there *is* no justice in the universe is the strongest possible reason to behave
<jbc> 'the world sucks enough, don't make it worse'
<jbc> You do evil, it'll never be undone. You hurt someone, they stay hurt. You sin, there's nobody to forgive you. YOu can't ever pay back the debt.
<jbc> more, that's not something you can resent, or escape from. The universe won't cut you any slack.

<[francesca]> God exists because there is chocolate.
<Whheeee> God is the caramilk secret?!
<Whheeee> That explains so much...
<Whheeee> And also why 1 pound of God cna cause you to gain 5 pounds :)

a Policeman In The Sky is a challenge to most - a forgiving god is a line of credit with which to do evil, and punishment is a way of *paying* for evil afterwards

<Desverger> witch do you believe in? God 0.1 or God 3.11? =)
<[francesca]> God XP :-)
<jbc> don't be silly, Desverger - christians all use God NT...

run into walmart all sweaty at 3 am, grab the nearest clerk and yell "Jesus man! Where are the fucking shotgun shells! They're right behind me!" Then set back and watch the fun began

eminem is the MAD magazine of rappers

<o____o> How do I tell if I am madly in love or if it is just gas?
<Nevaeh> Couch, hmm lets compare..
<Nevaeh> gas = stinks
<Nevaeh> love = stinks
<Nevaeh> gas = loud annoying sound
<Nevaeh> love = loud annoying spouse
<Nevaeh> oh there's the difference.
<o____o> You use a nozzle for both

<StCynic> You can light your gas on fire. You can't do that to your lover without going to jail.
<o____o> You can if you have a good lawyer

<Ike> Step out of your fantasy world, Cal.. You can't use magic.
<Caltak> I know I cant, thats why I have the wands, duh!

Replace the cotton on a Qtip with pikachi fur. And evertime you stick it inside your head to clean your ears, your hair would stand on end

I am SO glad I'm not female. an object the size of a watermelon coming through an opening the size of a lemon, over about 30 hours, without painkillers. I'm fucking terrified.

Someone in here once told me to "Live in order to spite life"

I heard a great quote about religion/philosophy last night "One who studies philosophy will be more confused than when he started, but it will be a higher state of confusion"

we r all just complex arrangments of atomic and sub atmoic particles... so dont think too much

will you be my ex-wife?

<Tonitrus> James_Valentine: Think of what He wanted, and what's actually happening. *I'd* be pissed. And if *I* were all powerful... wait, this is going back to the SimCity discussion.
<Adwyn> Simcity discussion?
<Tonitrus> Adwyn: Yeah. I was arguing that whoever thinks YHWH was cruel in the OT has never seen me play SimCity.

I love how an ABSOLUTELY FREE porn site has the resources to run spambots all over fuckin dalnet

!!!umop aplsdn w,I 'dlaH

<|Judy|> What kind of furry woodland creature makes a high pitched (and very loud) chittering noise?
<[francesca]> |Judy| A man who's had his testicles crushed?
<[francesca]> |Judy| A lumberjack man, of course, to satisfy the woodland creature requirement.

"And the Preacher spoketh and HE sayeth "thou shalt not obey God but stick to my crappy translations!"

I love teenagers... the most idiotic lifeform on earth

an infant has more inteligence than a teenager. an infant just sits there, shits in his pants and drinks milk while a teenager is out doing acid and getting aids

if during a snowstorm you walk out the door without a proper coat on and you dont say the word "fuck" alloud, you have anger issues

Jesus doesn't love you. He just wants to get into your pants.

Goldfish crackers add. "The snack that always smiles back, until you bite their heads off"

<o____o> what do you have against the guillotine??? It served the people well for centuries. It provided great entertainment and uplifted spirits all over europe. How can that be bad?
<Tonitrus> Kept heads turning too.
<Tonitrus> Rolling even.

<pusherman> I thought I had picked up a babe with my rapping but then she goes on to tell me she thought I was cute before I stepped on stage
<Tonitrus> Rap sucks.
<pusherman> you haven't heard me
<Kattelyn> cute til you opened your mouth huh

its religion dude :p it never gets better than confused ;p

Please...I could record my 3 year old son rambling and sell it as rap.

Solve the world's problems. Feed the homeless to the hungry.

ppl take jesus pretty seriously, except that they drink like fish and fuck like rabbits

"Satan's greatest trick was convincing everyone he is God."

<Kattelyn> That, and the principal talking to my mom about how I wasn't doing well in school and mom saying it was because I was BORED, and him saying "oh we'll dumb her down eventually"
* Kattelyn really hates hickville redneck towns
<pusherman> these people should be executed
<Kattelyn> you have no idea.

<Tonitrus> StarRider: The real world sucks.
<Tonitrus> StarRider: Besides, it can easily be summed up. "People are liars, and those whom you call friends will eat you if they get hungry". There. Problem solved.

(Quit: "We are not God. Not only are our powers limited, we are sometimes drivin to become the devil himself"- Wolfwood)

Actually, to be honest, I have no intention of losing my virginity until I'm practically guarenteed to have a life-long supply of sex. That'd be frustrating as hell otherwise. And I still fail to grasp the purpose of sex with a condom.

<Putney> let's discuss Russion existentialism, shall we?
<Alyosha`> Yes. Russians do exist.

Im from NY where the word "fuck" isnt even a word, its a comma

(Quit: Be careful what you wish for, even though you probably won't get it.)

<Nevaeh> I'm sick of humanity, I wanna be a feline.
<Alcar> Nev - That would be worse. I'd rather be human than be a little toy for humans to play around with and discard when they have no use for it.
<Nevaeh> isn't that what we are, either way?
<Alcar> lol! Good point :) But as a human I can have this illusion that I'm the puppet master and not another puppet :P
<Nevaeh> at least as a feline, I wouldn't have to pay for my room and board.

<pusherman> in montana you can buy beer at the gas station
<Alcar> pusherman - Makes sense. Really. Sort of like selling high explosives at a peace rally, or flamethrowers in a paper factory.
<o____o> Now there's a stupid idea
<o____o> Lets sell beer to drivers
<o____o> Drive through beer store, on the highway.

<Tonitrus> There is no Illumnati. I am not a member.
<[-Blacksword-]> I do not receve a monthly newsletter ;)
<Tonitrus> [-Blacksword-]: Nor I... *nods solemnly*

They have a contest going on, on speaker's corner on CityTV (Toronto local station, where they are getting people to do star trek impressions and winner goes to Vegas or something. The best one so far had a guy go "I could do some lame impression, but you should send me on the trip just cuz.. well cuz if you did, I'd get a life"

IRC is the next napster

<christy> but watch out for the ones dressed like klingons
<christy> those guys have years of pent-up stuff and the mask to hide behind
<christy> it's like those damned rpg'ers
<Alcar> christy - What?! Say it ain't so!
* Alcar has nothing pent up. Nothing, I tell you! Do you hear me?! Nothing! *grabs christy and shakes her* "I am not hiding anything!"
* Alcar wanders back to his corner

<o____o> I just played the "The SIms: Hot Date" and all my guy would do was feed fish in a pond and taunt his date.
<o____o> Its amazing how real life that game is

Let's say we have the word "Insane" which is how society uses the word, and the word "insane" to mean what actually is insane. In that case, most everyone, except, perhaps, the truly gifted, are insane, and the Insane ones are genii.

If wishes were horses, we'd all be dead and buried under manure :p

i think that a 36k ai program could easily enslave humanity

by 2008 all ppl will be desensitized by pornography and become disinterested in sex

a pet rebellion can be fun...I personally am anti-inertia, but it's not really getting me anywhere

it's just inherent in man to see justice wherever his own advantage lies

IMO, we can see the end of humanity approaching, at our current rate of "progress." So we choose not to. We lie to ourselves, or claim "Science will save us again!" The tragedy - or irony - is that we can see this end, this result, but we don't do anything to change it. We don't get off the road, or find a new one.

'This statement is a lie' is a paradox. What, then is 'This statement is true'?

california = granola. what ain't fruits and nuts, is flakes.

I don't know about you, but I don't know anyone who has been raped by a building.

<James_Valentine> doctrine? man, I dont have one. I hate doctrines. male doctrines are better, man. more med school experience
<JewPrince> george lucas should make a movie of it. then it will all make sense.

"gayer than a treeful of monkeys on nitrous oxide" -- I wish I'd thought that one up myself

<pusherman> men and women talk differently
<|Judy|> We do?
<jbc> we do?
<o____o> absolutely yes

<ArthurQ> when a plane drops on your head, we will see how you put judgments aside
<Baliadoc> i won't be able to. i'll be dead.

Men have penises. Women don't. Except the really scary ones

you have no right to say what other people can believe is right or wrong.

women are like pearls in side a clam or shell so my teacher says... the guys get mesmorized by the pearl.. and slowly gointo the shell in a daze and the shell closes on them,,,, and there trapped by the womens spell for the end of their days :/

"I trust nothing that bleeds for that long and doesn't die" [on menstruation]

<ArtQ-Sleeping> they arent ruthless murderers
<Alcar> Tell that to the people they killed.
<Baliadoc> see? you define things by where you live. when you do that, there's always a right, and always a wrong.
<Alcar> To them, the US are the big, evil murderers. It's all subjective.
<ArtQ-Sleeping> of course
<ArtQ-Sleeping> it always depends on your perspective
<ArtQ-Sleeping> ours just happens to be the right one.....simply because we are the most powerfull force on the planet
<Baliadoc> AUGH!
<Baliadoc> you did not just say that!!

I am the best at EVERYTHING. Especially modesty.

"I don't need modesty; I'm honest."

<Baliadoc> if you can't extend your thoughts beyond your own bubble, you can't pop anyone elses.

lots of british ppl are english

as long as you get to put your penis into something, its sex

The only thing that guys can do that I'd want to do is....well....let's face it. The ability to pee standing up is a pretty nifty feature.

What do the wings do? Can tampons fly?

something is wrong with dalnet, i got on in my first try

<Yishayahu> what actually trap humans or all living things in the karmic wheel??
<jbc> centrigugal force.

the world isn't an illusion, it's a point of view - jbc

for what it's worth, one of the most beautiful, fulfilling and comforting things in my belief system is the thought that it doesn't matter. Nothing really does. I have no power; the best I can do is have joy wherever I can and no, hurting people diminishes joy. Great comfort there, isn't there. :)

american humour tends to make use of the stupid. British humour tends to opt for the silly.

(Quit: Cats are like gods. Always aloof, and only paying you attention when you're making them offerings.)

any God who would punish someone infinitely for finite deeds and lacks the ability to redefine the word 'just' is not just.

<Guest\> Ummm GOd has told us His standards
<Guest\> we can abide or not
<Guest\> and yes there are consequenced
<Guest\> but we must remember, WE accept the consequences
<aslhk> Guest\: so if I hold a gun up to your head and tell you to do something or 'there will be consequences', and you choose not to do it, I can justifiably shoot you?

<^Catanna^> whats a calvinist?
<Alcar> Calvinist is someone who holds that Calvin is wiser than Hobbes.

(Quit: "If I had no other data than the early chapters of Genesis, some of the Psalms and other passages of Scripture, I would have arrived at essentially the same picture of the origin of the universe, as is indicated by the scientific data." - Arno Penzias)

I liked the story where the guy was frozen into a block of ice, painted, sawed into planks, and used as shelves in the deepfreeze

* |337C4Bb4g3 fears he will end up with like 30 cats ;b
<|337C4Bb4g3> I could become a cat herder!
<Tonitrus> |337C4Bb4g3: You have a god complex?
<|337C4Bb4g3> Tonitrus: What's that?
<Tonitrus> |337C4Bb4g3: The name for the complex you have :P

Well... when a girl sees a cute puppy, she takes it home with her. If I'm cute, how come I haven't been picked up yet?

My laugh sounds like God destroying a t.v. with an aluminum baseball bat.

"To guys, having sex is like going to McDonald's and getting a cheeseburger. To girls, it's a lot more emotional"

there's a recent article in the NY times that says the US now lags behind Iran in sex ed

See, my goal is to destroy the human race by passing my genes on.

<Kattelyn> has anybody else besides me and elt been having problems sleeping?
* jbc has. It keeps getting interrupted by the fucking alarm clock

<Eltanan> my mind has five major stress points. Employment, Finances, Sex, Other People, and Emotions.
<SloopJoy> I guess you don't have any teenagers then Eltanan :)

You know, if it weren't for my supreme moral and ethical standards, I'd go find a major anti-gun spokesperson, and kill them with a ballpoint pen. "Ban this!"

God Created heaven and the earth. Quickly he was faced with a class action suit for failure to file an environmental impact statement.

There is no emotion; there are emoticons. There is no ignorance; there is /ignore. There is no passion; there is trolling. There is no death; there is the /quit.

(Quit: "He who does not have three thousand years to draw on is living hand to mouth." Geothe)

As Sven says, "Absense of evidence is evidence of absense." Sven, however, is a total fucking moron.

<Alcar> True. If my parents had admitted to being God as well as Santa, they might have had more trouble with that claim :)
<Alcar> Mind you, being told "Go to your room unless you want to be a pillar of salt!" would be cool to say to kid.
* Alcar is going somewhere with this..... "Son, I told you to listen to me! If you don't stop I'm going to get Angry. Remember Soddom? I was just peeved then."
<Tonitrus> Alcar: lol. Maybe you shouldn't be allowed to have kids?

(Quit: "And trapped inside of my own mind / Afraid to open my eyes 'cuz of what I'd find / And I don't wanna live like this anymore..")

* MrHand points out: our deductions have not used terms like "deity" :)
<MrHand> as God is by definition, unique, such terms are simply confusions :))
<Alcar> No, God is by definition a word :p

<Alcar> Yeah. Lack of sleep lately is catching up :p I meant to be in bed last night at 10pm and ended up in reality in bed at 3 am and got an hours sleep :)
<Caltak> yikes
<Caltak> what were you doing all that time?
<Alcar> With friends, 2 hours. Unable to sleep, 3 hours after that :p
<WarezBert> hehe
<WarezBert> i think im making him overstimulated
<WarezBert> time to stop dropping tablets of metamphetimes into his coffee
<WarezBert> he's so dosed up, that when he has heart attacks, he just sprints to the hospital

<MrHand> the only question that remains then is: what method does god communicate his intent for man..the answers, so to speak, to the question of "why"?
<AlcarGM> IMO, the answer that makes the most sense - infuriating as it may be - would be "Why not?"
<MrHand> alcar: ok..then god has to communicate the answer to BOTH questions...fair enough :)

<Tech-Sensei> quirky thing about post-appocolyptic movies
<Tech-Sensei> why is it the "city limits" sign is always still there?
<Tech-Sensei> Every movie.
<DyingTwilight> I think its supposed to give you a sense of what has transpired, setting a mood by showing you a sign for a large city that none can imagine existing
<DyingTwilight> at least....I think thats the idea
<Tech-Sensei> uh DyingTwilight....
<Tech-Sensei> It was a joke at the "realism" of the city limits sign always being there

Has anyone ever abandoned their Christianity because rabbits don't chew their cud or because bats aren't birds?

I got my nose broke :) I thought it was time to slam my face in an ex-friends fist :)

Thinking is the shit of the gods.

AOL, reinforcing negative stereotypes for over a decade

<Alcar> On the plus side, I've formulated a theory that the universe permits intelligent life to exist so it can show it off during mating season with other universes. *Any* universe can show off stars and black holes, rocket ships are something else entirely.
<Alcar> That was on the bus trip back from work. My brain on almost no sleep is scary some days.
<aslhk> hmm
<aslhk> I don't think so though
<aslhk> the more clever universes would just have rocket ship-shaped things
<aslhk> less effort

<Darkkin> The days you get alot of sleep make you 'normal'
<Alcar> Darkkin - Well, normal enough not to consider intelligence a version of universal make up, yeah

If sex is the driving force behind humans, then equating war with sex makes war useful :p

(Quit: "And I can see your eyes when the stars hang low / Like a crown, the moon wears a dim halo / And to all my regret, I fare thee well / You came around too slowly as I fell / My screams can only echo off the walls / I see nothing left to break my fall..")

<Baliadoc> that's what was bugging me. people with that kind of power don't normally give it up based on term limits ;)
<Baliadoc> i'm not saying it couldn't happen. i'm just saying it normally never would :)
<Alcar> Very good people :)
<Alcar> Or people who know that if they don't, someone is goign to assassinate them :p
<Baliadoc> Very good people aren't politicians ;)

<philyah> hey where are you from?
<Alcar> Canada.
<philyah> oh okay. You don't have any ice caps melting on you do you?
<Alcar> Not right now :)

My mind ends up in the gutter more than my frisbies ever did. *sigh*

Islam is the scourge of the world. I thought I despised Christianity, but I didnt' know what "despise" meant.

<Rex_Goodheart> I was thinking... it's a good thing the French didn't give us a nude Statue of Liberty. Imagine the cost of that giant cloth John Ashcroft would have used to cover her up.
<Tonitrus> I don't think I'd like the Statue of Liberty nude. Not with that figure, anyway.
<Tonitrus> Lose the crown, pick a better shape, and more intesting pose... and...
<Tonitrus> Err... I'm going to shut up now.

If the terrorists ever destroy [the statue of liberty], we should make a fully poseable one to take her place... Like a giant Gumby. When we're feeling petulant as a nation, we'll make him stick up a finger.

Time can't move faster than light! Einstein would be really, really upset if it did.

<Alcar> All beliefs require faith, tho, JewPrince.
<Alcar> You have to believe your path is either the Rigth One, Embraces All Other Paths or All Paths Are Equally Right. If the latter, you should invent a new path just for you :p

<Alizar> If I'm expected to believe it's the One True Faith (tm), surely it has some attributes that set it apart from other religions.
<aslhk> Alizar: well, it's the One True Faith (tm) =P

Philosophy is a very elaborate way of making a lie convincing.

<Alcar> there is a members.aol.com site about the terrors of hell...
* Alcar finds this ironic

* PanicFactor suddenly masters the 5 magics and summons forth a bottumless void of sorrow to swallow TheShrike
<AlcarGM> PanicFactor - Which 5 magics? :)
<PanicFactor> the best ones Alcar ;)
<AlcarGM> TV, Reality, Fantasy, Religion and Science? :p

<chachas> just trying to open you up to new prospects ... ***chachas Quit (Ping timeout) <---- Remember this the next time you try to open up new prospects

<AlcarGM> mangore - besides, there are many Christian denominations. Not even those who reasd the bible can agree on what God is.
<mangore`> AlcarGM: That's an obvious point--can't you even conceive the reason WHY>
<AlcarGM> mangore - Because people are people. That's why. We don't see things the same way.
<mangore`> AlcarGM: You sound like that's a legitimate excuse..Yes, we are all different, but God is the same. The reason there are so many denominations is that man listens to other men..and not to God.
<AlcarGM> Hows people being people an illegitimate excuse for people being people?!

You misunderstand. My Religion damns those of subhuman intelligence

I then got to wondering about the origin of the word and words possibly related. Bored, Boredom, Bordello ? What better way to cure boredom! lol

*** samdei was kicked by DJ^Krush (get a room!)
*** samdei has joined #religion
*** samdei was kicked by Apsu (Not this one, you freak!)

Soulmate: A term that sells romance novels

I believe the bible exists - I have a copy of it here it. As for the stories and fables, what's not to believe? All stories are lies by being stories. That doesn't stop them from being true as well :p

<BZ_1> pantheism....EVERYTHING is God?
<Alcar> Yep.
<BZ_1> My Subaru is God?
<Alcar> Give me a reason why it isn't *grins*

*** Now talking in #CybersexRehab
*** Topic is 'The first step to all issues in life is first admiting the problem exists. I would like to congratulate you for making that FIRST step! Go ahead and pat yourselves on the back.. no pervert I said.. back! o.o'
*** Set by Nevaeh on Sun Apr 28 02:32:46

(Quit: In my perfect world, I could make your head explode from the comfort of my desk chair.)

The last thing I need is an addictive game that's also free.

This game isn't addictive in the slightest. I hesitate to even call it 'interesting'... who has the crack for it, again?

i was thinking the other day, it would really suck if you were reincarnated as a gold fish and couldn't remember to meditate or do whatever, because you couldn't remember more than 5 minutes

<StCynicGone> Well you're about the 10th person upon whose back I've placed the Snood monkey
<StCynicGone> it's very, very addictive
<Tonitrus> StCynicGone: Thank you. I'd talk more, but you're interrupting my game.
<StCynicGone> <G>

i must be a paladin or a ranger or something... ever since i saw a foam mickey on TV i've wanted to kill me some ;)

'tis far better to say "The truth is out there." than "The truth is sitting right here in front of me in bold-faced type, but I can't read it because I'm an utter moron."

(Quit: A mind that never questions is a questionable mind.)

When you put 'THE' and 'IRS' together, it forms 'THEIRS'. Coincidence? I think not?

<eds_trip> so whats everyones religion here?
<aslhk> I have my own, and I shine it every day
<aslhk> it gleams.
<jjbc> aslhk: that's not a religion, it's a penis
<aslhk> jjbc: my friend, I know very well what a penis is, and my religion is certainly not one.

part of trolling is not getting crucified

*** Alcar is now known as Pillar_Of_Pepper
<Keith`> POP?
<Pillar_Of_Pepper> Pillar of Salt has been done before :)
* Pillar_Of_Pepper is helping fill God's table.
* Keith` would go with piller of suger but would get to many requests to be licked
<Pillar_Of_Pepper> lol
*** Pillar_Of_Pepper is now known as Pillar_of_Freud
<aslhk> lol
<aslhk> that's horrible
<Pillar_of_Freud> Speaking of pillars :)

<eds_trip> i'm looking for a good mindless game riht now. i need something to clean out my brain.
<Alcar> IRC
<Alcar> Specifically, dal.net channel #philosophy
<eds_trip> thats a game ??? :)
<Alcar> Or, if you're really into self mutilation of the mind, #poetry
<Alcar> Yes :p

I think like, "Members of a sex, which, while different from that of my own in some certain physiological respects, is in every way its equal, and no one can tell me otherwise; the other day, this person tried to tell me otherwise, and I was like, "Look, you fool, you're living in the past, and that was never the case anyway, okay, because everyone is exactly the same, except for those things within them which make them unique. Everyone."

She is a total fox, and if a girl like that could like me.... *shudder* I don't want be at fault for the end of the world

<aslhk> indeed, there are only a few Right Thinking People in the world (read: people who agree with me)
* Alcar has met lots of Right Thinking People on IRC who agree with me! But then I get klined for clones :(

<Keith`> now are you going to lisen to a few people that have been where you are or are you going to crawl into irc and play games?
<Jeramias> crawl onto irc ;)
<aslhk> that's hardly even a choice at all!

<aslhk> would you give her a straight answer on what you think of her? =P
<Jeramias> Heck no
<Darkkin> She is a Female Jeramias she can't give straight Answers
<Darkkin> Its a Genetic Law

<aslhk> no one likes giving straight answers =P
<aslhk> it's like running around the streets naked, without that exhilerating feeling =P

(Quit: Its been a rough day. I got up this morning ...put on a shirt and a button fell off. I picked up my briefcase and the handle came off. I'm afraid to go to the bathroom. -Rodney Dangerfield)

but there seem to be too many old, evil men in the islamic world making it the hell they warn others about

atheism is good for people that can´t handle the beauty of the stars so they look at the pavement a lot

<\\`arner> sigh no. and you guys promised to kill me if I ever got a life.
<Keith`> buy me a round trip plain ticket and i'll push you off the bridge
<Keith`> or did you want to die some other way?
<Warner> Keith` no that would be fine. You willing to buy cancled seats at the last minute? my suicide budget is kinda tight.
<Keith`> is it theft if i never show up?
<Warner> hehe it is if you take my money and run
<Keith`> oh well shit, then warner your on your own
<Warner> then again hunting you down and killing you might just be the reason to live I need ;)
<Warner> who'da thought suicide could be so much fun :)
<Keith`> i'm sure i could get a good last meal on warners money... nah
<Warner> on my money you could get a good last can of soda and a twinky
<Keith`> well fuck warner i can get that now and it not be my last
<Warner> provided you wern't in a movie theater at the time

<Baliadoc> so anyway Jer, what's been keeping you busy?
<Jeramias> Me? I was wondering where you were.
<Jeramias> I would sit at my computer nightly wondering why you weren't saying anythign
<Jeramias> Then I noticed that my computer wasn't plugged in
<Baliadoc> as it turns out, I was trying to start some rather fascinating conversations with you. You'd either A) not be on, or B) well, just not be on.

like all great coders I work best when sitting on the toilet. relieves the presure on my brain :)

<Warner> sounds like a pscyic phone line
<Warner> Hi, we know who you are and why your calling, but humor us and tell us your credit card number

<Chaos`^> But they started in Gillette! ^_^
<Warner> Gillette? and I thought they just made shaving products
<Keith`> now thats a fucked up name for a town
<Warner> Does it have a gay bar named "The best a man can get?" :)

"Guns don't kill people, bullets do. Guns just get em' moving real fast."

"Guns don't kill people, i do"

<Allan67453> Help! The Christians! They're after me!
*** Allan67453 has left #Atheism

* ArthurQ reaized that "dating" and Marriage mean diffrent things for stars and for common folk
<ArthurQ> Whilst For common folk dating comes before marriage
<ArthurQ> for the famous folk..... Marriage IS dating.
<ArthurQ> *Hrm i'll marry this guy for a year, then dump him and try this guy*

<TrAmBieNCe> lets argue proven theorems
<Munin> lets not and say we did
<AlcarGM> 1 + 1 = 2 or 3?
<AlcarGM> How about that? :p
<TrAmBieNCe> well its 3 if your talking characters

<TrAmBieNCe> excessive freedom is bad for people
<Tonitrus> ...
<Tonitrus> That's the stupidest thing I have ever heard said.
<TrAmBieNCe> did your parents let you do whatever you wanted to?

<Baliadoc> wow... i like this popup window :)
<Baliadoc> "CONGRATULATIONS! You are the 66374929th visitor to our website! Click here to close this window and contact our prize department!"
<Baliadoc> who awards people for being the 66374929th visitor to anything?

"The essense of religion is man's attempt to somehow convince himself he's jumped through enough hoops for God to give him the approving nod. Religion is what rushes in to fill the vacuum created by the absense of intimacy with God."

"People only see what they are prepared to see." -- Ralph Waldo Emerson

'I think the ringleader of this software smuggling syndicate is some guy called '|33t', his henchman are 'hax0r' 'r0x0r' and 'j00''

Don't you hate it when you really need to talk to a certain someone but also know they are unable to phone, and every time the phone rings you just know it's, once again, not them?

Don't confuse freedom with insanity

I wouldn't want to date anyone as jaded as me. But I wouldn't want to date anyone who was all bunny rabbits and sunshine either

"To state that God is unknowable is to state something known about God. Agnosticism refutes itself."

"To love is to place our happiness in the happiness of another." -- Gottfried Wilhelm von Leibnitz

love is something that can die as soon as you stop doing it. you don't show love. you *DO* love. see? that's my opinion.

how can you know you've had the most love you can have until you've had all the love there is?

a thief always suspects his house is about to be burglarized.

<jbc> ryft: you didn't answer that earlier one... if she found someone else, would you wish her well?
<Ryft> jbc: If she what?!

What starts with F and ends with UCK? Fuck. Tell that one to your friends who have heard the firetruck version, it'll throw em for a loop.

<jbc> ryft: so you're telling me you slammed a lid on even the remotest possibility of a relationship with two bi females??!
<jbc> you, sir, don't deserve to be a male. :P
<jbc> you turned down the number one male fantasy, for some weird posessiveness kick?
<Ryft> jbc: It's not possessiveness. It's morality. Sex is not so cheap and frivolous. It is a private affair between me and her, and no one else. Ever.
* ALLfuzzy replaces "posessiveness" w/ "morality" and still thinks Ryft "turned down the # 1 male fantasy"...

morality is a matter of not hurting other people

It's against morals in India to kill cows, but just about everyone else's daily ritual involves a cheeseburger

I do not lie. I have no respect for liars. There is no reason for anyone to ever have the need to lie when there are so many ways to tell the truth.

days like these i feel like running naked down main street with a burning tire as a necklace

"A mind is like a door: if you keep it open all the time, you might as well not have one" - Unknown

I was home alone and getting the jitters from sitting in one place for too long. I was just about to get up and leave when somewhere i heard this voice say that i should just take the rest of this sheet of acid instead. Thats the last time I take any advice from my cat.

Is to me but you gotta realize something, opionions are like assholes every one has one and they are all full of shit

<Tsume> I really wouldn't mind being a woman, and hey, look how many people ask me if I'm a guy or a gal
<Tsume> They're starting to get a hell of a lot more oppurtunities in life than men, as well as a better chance of achieving them, as well as the ideal of being beautiful =P
<Tsume> I think giving birth is a minute penalty for all they get in life.

<Tsume> Companies have to have a fraction of Women, Mexicans, Africans, and foreigners
<Tsume> Then what space is left over is for whatever's available -.-;
* Alcar nods. I once actually wrote down on a job application "White Male" under handicaps.
<Alcar> The employer didn't find it funny.

this conversation is misleading, though. 1) the vast majority of Americans are law-abiding, decent people. 2) people tend to exaggerate and boast on IRC.

<Sardaukar> Grugg with 300 million guns even measly semis you can make any government think twice
<jbc> Sardaukar: you try and organise those guns against the government, see how long you live
<Sardaukar> jbc a LOT longer than the dufus with harsh words as his defense
<jbc> Sardaukar: seriously. Take a bunch of peaceful protesters, and a private army sent to storm the whitehouse. Who do you think will live longer?
<Alcar> The army, jbc. They'd be shooting the proestors in the way of their attack :p

<aslhk> if betraying trust were a crime, everyone would be a criminal
<aslhk> why should only some people be punished for betraying trust but not all?

I've always found it odd that we have such elaborate systems to punish the wrong-doers, and just about nothing to reward the right-doers

but i am no scholar so i am inclined to agree with you to stop myself from looking stupid

<Alcar> Here's a question ..... the old thing about mothers loving children and all that. Do mothers love their children because the child is theirs, or out of a sense of duty?
<LaoTzu> Alcar, it came from them. they have a natural love for their child
<StCynic> I've never really understood that
<StCynic> I dont know how a woman can care for something she gives birth to
<StCynic> Cuz when you think about it, a baby is about the size of a basketball. And if I ever passed a basketball out of my body through a restricted passageway, I would never want to see that basketball again.
<StCynic> Not even on weekends

I read a quote in a book that really struck me for some reason. A young woman said she never wanted to have children and her mother said to her, "But if you don't have children, how will you know how much I love you?" Profound.

<StCynic> I think Hillary Clinton said it best when she wrote her book "It takes a village to please my husband"
<StCynic> Wait, wrong book
<StCynic> Laura Bush is writing one called "It takes a village idiot to be my husband"

* o____o has learned to juggle
<o____o> while idle, I learned to juggle.
<|Judy|> couchie: Good for you!
<o____o> I have foam balls with happy faces printed on them
<|Judy|> And they say irc isn't good for anything. heh
<o____o> And now i can approach hot women and ask "would you like to jugle my happy balls?"

I got smacked with the bible belt a few times as a child

* [francesca] thinks pot should be legalized and regulated as the more dangerous drugs such as nicotene and alcohol are

There are 19 casinos in the state of michigan, 6 state run lotteries...but gambling is illegal

<o____o> Fran, its not a novel idea. Many countries have legalized pot and hookers
<StCynic> Legalize crime!

"There's my creation, perfect and holy in all ways. Now I can rest.....Oh my ME....I left fucking pot everywhere...SHIT. If I leave pot everywhere it'll give people the impression that they're supposed to use it...FUCK...now I gotta create Republicans."

* TheShrike resists the temptation to drop a Catholic joke...
<TheShrike> hey, I'm allowed to... I paid my dues, spent 6 years in Catholic school and used to be an altar boy (and before you ask, the answer is no)

i think its hilarious how im an altar boy, i go to catholic school, in the CYO and the peer ministry, go to church every sunday and holy day, know more about the bible than my parents, and still am not a christian

It's often the detractors of a religion who know more about it than those who follow it :p

<[francesca]> Kenny G still can't afford to buy himself an entire last name? Pathetic.
<StCynic> His last name is Gorlick
<[francesca]> I can see why he'd shorten it to G
<StCynic> <------ expert on the horrors of popular culture
<[francesca]> Kenny Gorlick - just doesn't ring

If I were Vanilla Ice, I'd commit seppuku to preserve my family's honor.

the imagination of ones mind is limitless compared to the graphics and polygons slaped onto a computer monitor.

<Alcar> How does idling in a channel help it? :)
<PsychoSanity> It makes it look full, so people stay when they come
<PsychoSanity> Its a peer-pressure type thing,cept its passive =-)

oh oh guess what? I found a $20 bill on the floor at work while sweeping. It seems every time I start to hate my job too much, the universe tries to throw me a bone. I mean, I appreciate it, but still, I do hate my job. :P

Testosterone is the root of all evil

* Imogene` thinks part of the problem is that, once men realised that they actually *had* role in sex, and women just didn't become pregnant spontaneously, they began to get fearful and realise "That child is mine." "Wait, how I can prove that child is mine? She could have slept with anyone!" Hence the invention of marriage :)

you don't feel that being considered a slut has negative ramifications on your social placement or career?

<Tandaco> Falwell shits me
<[francesca]> Tandaco I think you're too big for Falwell to pass.

(Quit: "And so it is that we, as men, do not exist until we do...and so it shall be that nonexistence shall take us back from existence, and that nameless spirituality shall return...like a tired child home from a very wild circus." -Greg Hill)

<MAJIN_DOOMSDAY> WANT TO EARN MONEY THEN JOIN MY CHANNEL AND BE APART OF HELPING MAKE MONEY FOR EVERYONE INCLUDING YOU,,,WE NEED IDEAS..AND SUGGESTIONS..SO JOIN NOW ARE CHANNEL IS GROWING...I JUST STARTED TODAY AND ALL READY MY CHANNEL IS GETTING BIGGER ONLY A FEW MORE OPS LEFT TO FILL SO,,DONT WORRY DOESNT COST A THING JUST IDEAS FROM U AND OTHERES /JOIN #FREE_MONEY
<Fooz> (god i'm warped)
<Imogene`> « hmm? »
<Fooz> (/msg <whats his fuck>We the ops of #game1 would here by take the time to infrom you of your billing polacie for placing adds in our channel, Your IP has been logged, your ISP will be called to collect a billing adress should you not provide one your self, your first add is half off every add there after is 200 amarican dallers an add. thank you and have a nice day.)

earning money's c00!, spendin' money is even c00ler

(Quit: love is a razor, and i walk the line of that straight blade. love is a party, but only a masquerade. love is the thing that made you cry and love is the thing that makes me die.)

<^Kit^> love is a celery stick in a blender
<^Kit^> out of place but somehow worth experiencing, if only once.

love is a dead dog on the side of the road/attracting bitchass flies who steal the dog's eyes/love speaks to me while others do not hear/and that is why I was touching the dog, your honour.

love is a haiku / short as a cold winter day / empty as this poem There :) Makes no sense whatsoever ;p

Love is a nightmare / wake up screaming MAKE IT STOP! / is there an off switch?

<^Kit^> Love is bloody and red / locked tight in a glass bottle / please pass the ketchup
<^Kit^> -y
<^Kit^> damn the letter y. it ruined my hauku!

<AlcarGM> the letter y sits / not a vowel, forgotten / lovers don't ask why :p
* AlcarGM beams. #poetry material!

small birth control pills/ a new color for each week /why is love so hard?

"No greater burden hath man than the burden of freedom, for when incarcerated in responsibility do dreams of freedom prevail, and when free he becomes unsure about what is to be. Hopelessness is the cross of the free, dreams are our blessing." - laity

The Odyssey isn't mean to be actual, but not being actual doesn't mean untrue

There is no such thing as an omen. Destiny does not send us heralds. She is too wise or too cruel for that. - Oscar Wilde

<DJ^Krush> Speed_ba||: You cannot create a God, that defies the definition of God :)
<Speed_ba||> God defies himself
<DJ^Krush> Speed_ba||: How can he do that if he doesn't exist?

<Speed_ba||> The truth is NO one is sure about anything and no one has the knowledge and We are all going to die without it
<Speed_ba||> The End
<AlcarGM> Speed_ba|| - If no one is sure about anything, how are you sure about that The End statement? :)
<Speed_ba||> because everyday hundreds are dying in confusion
<Speed_ba||> and you are also going to
<AlcarGM> So people can be sure that people die then, Speed_ba||?
<AlcarGM> So you refute your statement that "The truth is NO one is sure about anything" then?

<Chaos`^> I should be asleep right now
<aslhk> don't blame insomnia, blame yourself!

"Why do you need science to prove God? You do not. These scientific proofs of God are not only an insult to scientists; to those who are deeply religious they are an insult to God." - Michael Shermer

<^Kit^> what are you talking about?
<aslhk> I shall have to find what I am talking about
* ^Kit^ scratches her head
<aslhk> so I can tell you =P

<aslhk> DJ^Krush: many things which did not actually occur are in official police records, particularly in the 18th century
<DJ^Krush> aslhk: True, but there is more evidence that points to the existence of a secret organization known as the Illuminati, than evidence that points out that they didn't exist
<aslhk> DJ^Krush: but not much more. One (or even a few) police records is hardly conclusive evidence
<AlcarDM> DJ^Krush - Then doesn't that prove it DOES exist? :)

<aslhk> soccer isn't really a big sport in america
<aslhk> naturally, if we continue doing well, it shall become a big sport
<aslhk> just as gymnastics and the like became the highlight of the olympics--things no americans care about in other times *chuckle*
<aslhk> we just like to win =P
<o____o> yer just a bunch of winners. lol
<aslhk> we win everything that matters because everything that matters is defined as what we win!

the imagination goes wherre pixels fear to tread :p

<Alcar> I have it! Distrust of the american gonverment is common, everywhere. Therefore, Canada won't join it because Canadians believe that the US government is more corrupt (hah!) .. so the death fo Kennedy, which largely began the whole "the US is corrupt idea" was hatched by UEL loyalists in Canada who saw the future and didn't want a merger between the two nations.
* Alcar is brilliant, eh?

I don't spend too much time pondering the afterlife either... I believe in reincarnation, and don't put much more thought into it. I am much more interested in knowing what is the best way for me to live the life I have today as best as I can... it's easy to die, but not as easy to live properly

"Destiny grants us our wishes, but in its own way, in order to give us something beyond our wishes. " -Goethe

<madefromscratch> i find it funny how there a 1,000 churches trying to unify one people
<Gedit> churches to me are an argument against religion
<Gedit> but not against god, though

"what we do is important...how we do it is more even more important...but the MOST important is WHY we do it...you can put a perfect equal sign between yourself and your motivations" -fr. angelus shaugnessy

"Experts estimate that there are at least 150,000 Americans masturbating RIGHT NOW! Masturbation costs American businesses at least $3.14 billion in lost productivity every month!

<o____o> LOL, the kkk website speaks of White America and plays "God save the Queen"
<o____o> lol
<o____o> I bet they don't know what the tune means

<Caltak> god, im surrounded, with computers on two sides of me... if one wasnt broken, this'd be like a dream :P
<Keith`> lol
<Alcar> "I dream, I dream, I dream of self chemotherapy!"
<Alcar> Nah, won't catch on.
* Caltak stares blankly off into space, beginning to drool... then suddenly snaps to. "Damn radiation.. where's my tin foil hat?"
<Alcar> "No, there it is! Wait the lights aren't on. ... Is it a bad sign when my tin foil hat is glowing in the dark?"
<Keith`> no remember you warded it against aliens

* Alcar does know the truth - for me. No one else. And it's always changing.
<aslhk> TheDigitalMage: any statement of fact (like the ones you've been spouting off incessantly) is qualifies as thinking one is "right"
<TheDigitalMage> they certainly are right, to them. but NO ONE is right in an absolute sense. that simply does not exist, because each of us has a different perception of what "right" is !!
<o____o> TheDigitalMage, Is that right?
<o____o> absolutely right?

<Baliadoc> what're the stats?
<Alcar> str: 5 (plastic) Dex: 0 (1 if thrown) Con: 10, barring viruses, int: 1.3 gigs, wis: 16 ram, cha: 2
<Caltak> 2.4 GHz pentium 4, 512 MB RAM, 80 GB HD, 128 MB GeForce 4
<Caltak> CDRW and DVD ROM
* Alcar 's was better :p
<Alcar> LOL!
* Alcar read that as 4, 512 MB RAM for a sec :)
* Alcar was about to ask who needed over 4000 ram :p

<Caltak> my speakers -- these are speakers that just came with it, mind you -- have a subwoofer.
<Alcar> what IS that
<Alcar> It sounds sexual, or like a kids stuffed animal.
<Alcar> Maybe both.
<Baliadoc> the subwoofer is a large speaker which handles bass
* Alcar grins
<Alcar> Call the Computer store and say you want a new subwoofer. "It says it's for bass, but I can't put the fish anywhere!"

I'm failing to understand how randomness negates free will.

Oh, we have choices. We are merely able to choose only one of them.

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The requested URL /disney/disney.shtml was not found on this server.
Additionally, a 404 Not Found error was encountered while trying to use an ErrorDocument to handle the request.

I hate that. When you meet a really beautiful woman and she has a....penis

I don't mind conforming as long as I agree with it.

Women have bras and high heels. Men have ties.

<[francesca]> Why do I want to see a man tie his own penis in a knot?
<o____o> You'd rather see him tie somebody else's?

Not once in my life have I ever looked down at my penis and thought, "I need to accessorize this"

<StCynic> Ronald Reagan defined ketchup as a vegetable
<StCynic> Of course, Ronald Reagan IS a vegetable
<[francesca]> StCynic lol - that wasn't funny - lol

<o____o> I'm all for minimal government
<Alcar> o____o - What sucks is that the government is never for minimal government ;p

when the majority are glued to their tvs, watching the abhorrent and sickeing arena violence called the WWF, and when it costs a hundred times what a president makes in his whole four-year term to get him elected... is there any hope ??

<PandaPowr> you won't back up your argument
<TheDigitalMage> i don't have to

You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him drow--I mean drink.

Violence can only be concealed by a lie, and the lie can only be maintained by violence. Any man who has once proclaimed violence as his method is inevitably forced to take the lie as his principle (Alexander Solzhenitsyn )

"Every positive value has its price in negative terms...The genius of Einstein leads to Hiroshima." - Pablo Picasso

<Sin{Away}> 4 books
<Sin{Away}> Barbera and Scott Siegel
<Sin{Away}> #1 The Burning Land, #2 Survivors, #3 Thunder Mountain, #4 Shockwave
<Sin{Away}> All sing praise to the almighty google :)
<ArthurQ> oh boy
<ArthurQ> I wonder what happenes in the 4th one
<Alcar> The series ends.

The e-mail of the species is more deadly than the mail.

(Quit: I'm off like your mom's panties at an Elvis concert)

<Baliadoc> last time i saw Atlantis, it was south-bound on the I-5, wanted on two counts of 1st degree murder
<Baliadoc> on the other hand, that could've just been part of the OJ trial. i was a bit drunk at the time.
<Alcar> "Does this continent fit? Does it?"
<Alcar> "My client didn't sink Atlantis, your honour. It was someome from Lemuria clevery disgused in his DNA."

(Quit: You know ure stressed when you can hear mimes)

lol I find the idea that these teenagers are somehow unaware of birth control utterly nonsensical - the fact that they don't use them is something within teen culture itself

MTV and a lot of other channels seem like giant surgically augmented flesh feasts from hell :P

You have the right to bear arms, we have the right to bare breasts

I think I'm going to give up on women, and have me a dog for the companionship and a dirty magazine + cucumber for the other. oh. I said too much.

<Nevaeh> You do have bisexual tendencies though..
<Nevaeh> for instance, you live in Canada..
<Nevaeh> ;P

<o____o> some people buy big buildings to be remembered by
<o____o> others have kids
<o____o> whih is cheaper?
<o____o> I don't know

<bnyfoofoo> :) how is everyone?
<Tandaco> pretty good apart from the psychopath who wants to kill me and the probs with the chix
* Alcar puts away the knife. What psychopath? I'm a sociopath!

<Tonitrus> Alcar: Psychopaths and sociopaths are the same. Antisocial personality disorder.
<Alcar> Tonitrus - There are some differences.
<Alcar> If you give me your address I could come over and enlighten you on them.

(Quit: "I'm your dream, make you real / I'm your eyes when you must steal / I'm your pain when you can't feel / Sad, but true / I'm your truth, telling lies / I'm your reasoned alibis / I'm inside, open your eyes / I'm you")

is formatC a new computer vitamin?

<aslhk> Rex_Goodheart: heh, you are absolutely wrong, there. Non sequitur applies when the assertion does not follow from the premises. As their were no premises, your assertion did not follow.
<aslhk> It was, in fact, non sequitur
<Rex_Goodheart> aslhk, all I can say at this point is that you're clueless.
<Alcar> aslhk - That was ..... wow.
* Alcar shakes his head
<Rex_Goodheart> aslhk, go take a formal logic class, then you might stop embarrassing yourself.
<aslhk> Rex_Goodheart: People are often rendered speechless by my immense intellect.
<aslhk> Rex_Goodheart: I recommend you do the same.

Hey, we're meant to be adding the trolls to ignore not the other way around. What sort of lousy trolls are you guys?!??!

The notion that religion is for the weak because in some form or another it supplies a 'big daddy' rests on the assumption that the 'big daddy' in question does not actually exist. If it does, then religion is not just for the weak but for everyone the same way that the law is for everyone and not only the 'weak' will abide it

mind you, talking about sex to people in internet chatrooms is like explaining VCRs to cavemen ive found

* jbc gets laid regularly. Eclipses are regular, aren't they?

Some people, when you say that the sky is blue, will argue with you by saying the sky is not orange.

"There's only one thing worse than the man who will argue over anything, and that's the man who will argue over nothing." - Laurence Peter

You should be in bed, you'll miss the iq fairy again.

<Rex_Goodheart> The pledge issue is identical to the prayer issue.. the defense is that "nobody is REQUIRED to say them", but the coercion factor on children is immense. I believe that reciting the pledge would have died a long time ago as a waste of time, except for the inclusion of the "under God" part.
<Tonitrus> Rex_Goodheart: Then I suggest you find a way to give those children balls.
<Tonitrus> It is not the duty of government to take care of every weak-willed pissant that comes along.

Welcome to #Religion, skeptic1. I hope you enjoy your stay. While we barrage you with right-wing rhetoric in an attempt to convert you to our various fundamentalist sects, please feel free to partake of our many relaxing pastimes, such as being trolled.

The government itself prints the money. Why the hell do they need ours?

he said he was dense, and to which I replied." "Mahogany?"

soulmate = person who will watch you while you cyber with someone

\/\/h47 d0 y0u m34n? Y0u c4n'7 r34d 13375p34k v3ry w311? 4ww, 7h47 5uck5.

<Alcar> o____O - Seriously, tho. I doubt most Canadians are really that knowledgeable about US geography either. Granted, we don't go to Maine and ask why it's snowing (I hope)....
<GeminiRai> "Why is it snowing? Isn't the US the lake of fire?"

(Quit: Some of us alow ourselves to feel charmed when called "special" by our spouse, especially when it slips our minds that society labels "special" as mentally challenged.)

<Tech-Sensei> I could write rap lyrics
<Tech-Sensei> Just record the stream of vulgarities that come out of my mouth after my computer crashes

(Quit: If Jesus loves me, why doesn't he ever send me flowers?)

* barking_frog would like to do certain things to Brittney Spears, but none of them have anything to do with her music
<Tonitrus> Gah.
<Tonitrus> Have you no decency? Get a blow up doll, or a corpse, or something less defiled.
* barking_frog wonders if you can buy a blow-up doll of a corpse :-/

<Vetman> i think budhism is a good religion
<barking_frog> Buddhists suck
<barking_frog> they're all pagan scum who are going to the Devil because they haven't accepted that Jesus Christ is the only way to God
*** Vetman was kicked by Religionist (Banned)
* barking_frog hopes he joins #buddhism so barking_frog can tell him that Christians are all doomed to spend the rest of eternity repeating their Earthly lives because they can't understand that the only way to Nirvana is to seek understanding of their true nature :-)

I heard a great quote when I was young... I *WISH* I could find the source, 'cause I'd get it printed on a t-shirt... it went something like "Books are for people who can't form their own opinions."

<Danis`> Kantizuni: there's a world beyond irc? =P
<Danis`> I don't believe you!
<Kantizuni> There is!
<AlcarDM> What's it like?
<Kantizuni> It's frightening.
* AlcarDM nods. I was at work today, in that real world, an' .. an' it was scary. Someone was bein', like, mean to me and I told him I was an op, an' he wasn't scared! I banned him and he wa s still in the room! Services were, like, down or something. Finally I just ignored him.

Before I fall unconscious, I'd just like to tell you that it's my 25th Birthday today.

The best covert agents do not know that they are covert agents. They do not know what they are watching. They do not know that they are sending data.

* [francesca] wonders how badly she wants to win a Darwin Award.

(Quit: and I was like fuck you department store and then I flew away)

That's because socialism is Bakunin's anarchism with no testacles. Add one testicle, and you have communism.

nothing applies to all of anything

when you think about it, modern Christianity is what you get when you start with Judaism, add in the gospels, add in Paul, then take out the gospels

<o____o> chess is violent
<o____o> The strong exterminate the weak.
<o____o> And with black and white peices, it encourages racial tension as well.
<o____o> chess leads to gang violence.
<o____o> On the next Geraldo
<Grugg> Don't forget the queen being more powerful than the king. Obviously some sort of homosexual propaganda.

the mudpuddle was sure that the pothole must've had a conscious designer, because it was inconceivable that the puddle could've JUST HAPPENED to have the exact dimensions of the pothole

* barking_frog just had an epiphany
* barking_frog was sitting here thinking to himself... "why do I spent so much time on IRC when 85% of the people I meet here are idiots?"
* barking_frog realized, "it's because 97% of the people I meet IRL are idiots"

(Quit: The Wise Pay As Much Attention To What They Throw Away As To What They Keep)

you know you're tired when you can picture a microwave having sex with your food and not be put off

What do you use to prove that Logic itself is correct?

Just a moment now - You can't have context, properties, opinions or comparisons without the premises that form the foundation of logic itself. Because what you just said is effectively this: The foundations of logic are the tools I use to prove that there is a reality, and is logical. I.e., a tautology. It's the same conclusion almost every major philosopher has come to over the millenia...

<Apsu> Ah, and how do you know that you exist, you're gathering it, it exists, it's real?
<Apsu> By assuming there's something called logic, by which assuming you can build a case for perception, order, reality, etc
<UnixCoast> the medium of perception
<Apsu> In other words, it all hinges on your first presupposition
<UnixCoast> pointing things out doesnt 'build the case', reality exists with or without me.
<Apsu> And that Nature of that presupposition is one without empirical evidence, as it Defines empirical evidence.
<Apsu> UnixCoast: That's your assumption :P

(Quit: Why do they call it a woman's "period" when it's usually accompanied by lots of exclamation marks?)

<yetifemme> this is the first time I can remember being stung, though
<o____o> Hope you are not allergic
<o____o> It can get nasty if y'are
<yetifemme> I was hoping I would be, but I don't think I am
<o____o> Hoping you would be/
<o____o> why?
<yetifemme> something to break up the monotony ;p

<yetifemme> Do you want an mp3, Tonitrus?
<Tonitrus> yetifemme: That would depend strongly on the mp3 in question.
<yetifemme> If you knew what it was like, I wouldn't have to send it to you, now would I? ;p
<Tonitrus> yetifemme: What is it?
<yetifemme> franka potente
<Tonitrus> Eh... what?
<yetifemme> it doesn't really have a genre
<Tonitrus> ...
<Tonitrus> I have a feeling I'm going to regret this..

Happy Independence Day to those who are independent or at least able to buy cheap miniature flags made by poverty-stricken Mexican children.

<Daveof1> I wonder if the Bible is the Player's Handbook or the DM's Guide???

We Pledge Allegiance 1. To this Great Country, with all the faults still seems better then most 2. Freedom 3. In the developement of weapons that can kill over the horizon anyone that disagrees with 1 & 2

<[francesca]> barking_frog Well, organized religion isn't for everyone.
<lackthereof> I don't think anything is for everyone. :)
* barking_frog thinks oxygen is for everyone

Yes, and it is possible that a single unit consists of only one unit.

* barking_frog is sitting here eating his greasy In-N-Out french fries, giving advice about fat-free eating :-)

<DJ^Krush> I have a great deal of respect for Islam, but like Christianity it is marred by the fact that most of it's followers are complete buffoons
<Grugg> "Dear Lord, save us from your followers"

science is a map. It's intended to accurately reflect the terrain. The difference betwenn Qur'an and science is that when the map and the terrain don't agree, science changes the map, and Qur'an tries to change the terrain. All clear? :-P

<barking_frog> what's the story with Mohommad, anyway? I want to know how some guy walked out of the desert with a long boring book, told everybody that God wrote it, and 1300 years later it's the 2nd largest religion in the world
<barking_frog> er... wait
<barking_frog> Moses did that too, didn't he :-/

<Ryft> I picture Joseph Smith sitting there with these monstrous oversized spectacles, hunched over these gold plates, translating them... and for some reason, I find the backdrop somewhere at Hogwarts.

"Your parents, they give you your life, but then they try to give you their life"

<yetifemme> Heh. Sweden is better than most other countries for pretty much everything (if you go by the stats)
<yetifemme> But they have two major obstacles to being great: 1. They're tiny 2. They don't speek English
<yetifemme> Yeah, but who cares about taxes when you have an Ikea right next door? ;p
<yetifemme> wow, I really typed "speek"
<yetifemme> lmao
<yetifemme> DAMN YOU, PHONETICS!

"You know how your parents are sort of like God. Sure, you love them and want to know they're still around, but you never really see them unless they want something"

<[francesca]> Anything that's not supposed to be questioned should DEFINITELY be questioned. :-)
<barking_frog> [francesca]: keep your dogmatic indoctrination to yourself! I'm having none of it!
<barking_frog> [francesca]: I will continue to blindly accept what's told to me no matter WHAT you say!

I heard that if you get very far south in the States, you have a good chance of getting Canadian Tire money exchanged to US dollars. ;p

<intellect|> ah my bf is calling he wants to fuck me now so i have to go - sorry and see you later everybody
<aslhk> hah! You aren't really a girl!
<aslhk> You're on irc!

<o____o> WHOA! On the news: The statue of liberty is revealed to be a man in drag
<Alcar> LOL couch. Hmm, which man?
<o____o> paul bunyan maybe

<Alcar> Hm, actually if there was a God and Day of Judgement, and I was asked why I didn't believe the only serious reply could be "Because I'm human."
<aslhk> Alcar: I think my reply would be "That question is best addressed by my life. Feel free to review it at your leisure and let me know your results. In the mean time, I'm going to take a nap on those pearly gates over there, alright?"
<aslhk> "Do you happen to have internet access here?" =P

I mean, you don't hear people say "There is one true religion, but it's not mine!" it's always theirs, by some astonishing coincidence.

<medameeee> Id like to join a game if thats possable
<Alcar> medameeee - D&D or other?
<medameeee> Well ive only played D&D but im willing to learn others
<Alcar> What edition of D&D?
<medameeee> well ive been playing since 79 so anyof them
<Alcar> Impressive.
<medameeee> that polite for im old LOL?

moestifer is a bot. he is my experiment in artificial stupidity

Why not start at the destination? Answer: Because you're already there, fuckwit!

<qaisoon> can you visit [an islam site] please for me
* Alcar can't, sorry. My computer's web browser is an atheist :(
<qaisoon> but give a chance for your mind to exmanie the truth , and then decide to accpect or not to accpect
* Alcar is confused now .... I've already accepted Eris in my heart. What other truth do I need?
<qaisoon> Eris
<Alcar> Yes.
<qaisoon> what do you mean >
<Alcar> So unless your site is really about Her, I don't see how it can be the truth. Unless it's Eris in drag..

Tell me, do you have something against the English language?

<moestifer> moestifer: no you don't seem to like me very much

Actually, come to think of it, making a religion and calling it The One False Religion would be more fun. Definitely more confusing :)

(Quit: Do not spoil what you have by desiring what you have not; but remember that what you now have was once among the things only hoped for. --Epicurus)

<Tonitrus> Ryft: My mom's side of the family can't speak. My dad's side mumbles. So I mumble incoherently.
<Tonitrus> Actually, I'm ok most of the time. I just tend to try to say something two different things at once (like my mom did)
* Ryft reads that twice, and chuckles
<Tonitrus> ...
<Ryft> "I just tend to try to say something two different things at once."
<Tonitrus> ... ... ... ... Just... ... die.

<Kristin_Hartnett> Do you think one must have some form of demensia to be a truly great artist or writer?
<Tim```> Yes.
<Tim```> No,.
<Tim```> Hm, we're not sure.

"Genius goes around the world in its youth incessantly apologizing for having large feet. What wonder that later in life it should be inclined to raise those feet too swiftly to fools and bores." - F. Scott Fitzgerald

* Baliadoc types 120 with 95% or so error-freeness
<Baliadoc> okay, actually, i don't. in fact, i don't know what i type really, but those numbers were big, and big is cool. :)

* Alcar sighs and vanishes in a really cheap magical trip that involves smoke, tear gas, moltov cocktails and a really pissed of audience once they recover from the burns

you can't see air. therefore it doesn't exist

* Alcar is upgrading soon!
<aslhk> oh?
<Alcar> I saw this really cool typewriter for $20 at a pawn shop.

gods are whatever people say are gods. Gods exist as long as there are people to worship them. None of that changed just because some people drempt up a new god and declared it supercedes the old ones

Evil has a way of getting into your chest and ripping your heart out and throwing it to the floor and doing a merry little jig on it and then kicking out into the garbage.

<Warner> the teen years are hard when your the son of a God
<Pan`Ku> but those years are kind of insignificant aren't they?
<Alcar> Warner - That brings to mind some definitely sacreligious thoughts :P

<Warner> if no absolutes exist then you have one right there. if absolutes do exist then the absolute never fails. You can't ever prove something never fails because thats proving a negitive. for all you know gravity could stop working tomarrow.
<Alcar> Warner - Yeah. I mean, I don't know about you but *I* never paid my gravity bill.

unless it involves me oweing you money you'll never get me to admit to an absolute :)

<Alcar> Just thought of reality as a big present in wrapping paper.
<Alcar> Doesn't eveyone? :)
<Warner> hmm this would imply that if one didn't like it one could return it.
<Warner> alcar must believe in reincarnation ;)
<Alcar> Go to walmart. "Hi, I'd like to return Reality. It's poorly presented and the lawaway fees were insane."
<Warner> "and it doesn't look anything like it's photo on the packaging"
<Alcar> sue for false advertising :)

* Alcar sighs . .what happened to the good old days when the pizza would arrive at your home before the police if you called both at the same time?
<Alcar> ... not that I've ever done that, of course.
<ArthurQ> um..
<ArthurQ> Alcar: I have.......
<ArthurQ> and guess what..
<Alcar> The police came and shot the pizza guy you said was trasspassing?

* Baliadoc doesn't hate hypocrits, because i'm often one myself. what i hate is hypocrits who don't think they're hypocrits :)

<ArthurQ> Alcar: im not talking about the guy on the bike, they made an electron move faster than what is considered the base speed of light in a vacume
<aslhk> and there are surprisingly few articles on such a revolutionary achievement. I have yet to find one, actually.
<Baliadoc> you can't find it because light is erasing all the info on it, aslhk. it doesn't want anyone to know it's been beaten :)
<aslhk> Baliadoc: lol. I knew there was something up when the colour of my shirt kept changing in an angry manner!

<heidi__> yes but if you've got two fighting groups each beleiving in the same god being on there side but at the same time both believing that the other side is wrong the god isn't half gonna get confuzed!
<Alcar> heidi - Naw. The side that wins was right :p
<Forest`> Alcar depending on how you define "right" you could be right ;)
<Alcar> Forest - In the only way it's been defined: by the winner :p

<[francesca]> Come on, people! ENTERTAIN ME!
<[francesca]> dammit
*** Nevaeh has joined #religion
* Alcar kisses Nevaeh passionately.
<Alcar> How's that fran?
<Nevaeh> wow
<Nevaeh> o.o
* Nevaeh blinks
<Alcar> [francesca] asked to be entertained.
<[francesca]> Hey! I never get greeted like that.
* Nevaeh has waited for this moment all of her days..
* Nevaeh forgets to kiss back.. figures.

* barking_frog remembers the teen years... barking_frog really enjoyed playing on the Mayflower

* Alcar knows it's *my* perceptual reality, nothing more. I am here. Other than that, the rest can be said to be iffy :)
<[francesca]> Alcar No you're not.
<Alcar> [francesca] - I'm not?
<[francesca]> Alcar Nope.
<[francesca]> Alcar You don't exist. You're a figment of your own imagination.

reminds me of the bumper sticker "My goddess made your god"

<skeptic1> well too bad that its virtually impossible to get a copy of Mein Kempf anywhere, since Chapter/Indigo took it off the shelf.
<virgio> Those fascists.

<st_snoogans> so whats the good word?
<Koby`> st_snoogans - Aluminium.
<Koby`> We made it the Word of God, just because it's funny hearing God mispronounce it
<st_snoogans> aluminum is a good word, indeed. i could not keep my leftovers from molding without it :)

<Reykemias> Each number shown below follows a certain rule. Figure out the rule and fill in the missing number.
<Reykemias> January 20, April 10, May 5, November 15, July ?
<Kentari> 1 20 4 10 5 5 9 15 7
<Kentari> Hmm
<Kentari> Wait
<Kentari> Maybe they're all weekdays
* Kentari gets a calendar

"If Jesus had been indicted in a modern court, he would have been examined by two doctors; found to be obsessed by a delusion; declared incapable of pleading; and sent to an asylum." -- George Bernard Shaw

*** I_Bet_Jesus_Christ_Was_Gay has joined #religion
<I_Bet_Jesus_Christ_Was_Gay> <---
* Koby` looks at I_Bet_Jesus_Christ_Was_Gay
<Koby`> Oh come now.
<Koby`> You'll have to work harder than that for a ban
<DJ^Krush> He will indeed
<I_Bet_Jesus_Christ_Was_Gay> it works in other channels dangit

*** JumpingJackFlash has joined #D&D
<JumpingJackFlash> i have a question about prestige classes
*** JumpingJackFlash has left #D&D
<Darkkin> hrmp
<Darkkin> Must be why he's called JumpingJackFlash
<MechaBlue> Why is it that people expect an answer in an amout of time that is smaller than lag?

<Tubbytubkins> Well last night I fell asleep on my chair, walked downstairs in my sleep and fell asleep on a couch. A friend of mine came in in the morning and I yelled 'Go away! Frankie is watching TV! BE QUIET!!' and she goes 'Tubbytubkins, what are you talking about?' and I went 'Please, just be quiet. Frankie is trying to watch'. So she sat down on the other couch in utter confusion then turned the TV on so I yelled 'STOP!
<Tubbytubkins> YOU'VE STEPPED ON FRANKIE, YOU'VE STEPPEDD ON FRANKIE!! GO AWAY!!!!' and she ran off. I have no memory of this at all
<DJ^Krush> Who is Frankie?
<Tubbytubkins> No idea...
<barking_frog> that wins lots of points for weirdness

<Alcar> It's kind of sad when you're computer runs so badly you hope it has a virus to explain things :p
<Darkkin> Your computer can't support a virus

<o____o> barking_frog, there are SOME black canadians
<o____o> just very few
<o____o> They don't talk like that where I'm at
<barking_frog> o____o: what do they do... mind meld?
<o____o> No, they speak english

Money can't buy happiness, but it can lease it.

I need to start drinking. I wish I didn't have to work tonight.

(Quit: "A few hours of mountain climbing turn a villain and a saint into two rather equal creatures. Exhaustion is the shortest way to equality and fraternity." - Nietzsche)

"You seem a decent fellow. I hate to kill you." "You seem a decent fellow. I hate to die."

the computer job market is supposed to pick up massively in a couple months. everyone is realizing that firing all their programmers and sysadmins wasn't the smartest thing to do ;b

*** ZarG has joined #religion
<ZarG> sup
<Alcar> 'lo ZarG
<ZarG> wtf dont insult me
*** ZarG has left #religion

People who think for themselves can be threatening to those who don't.

<[francesca]> True wisdom is asking me for my advice and then following it. ;-)

"Excuse me, can you direct me to the self-help departnent?"

Without exception, the only 'help' these self help books can provide is if you're a hobo and need something to set on fire to keep you warm

<keanugirl> it seems to me that religion is a solcae for ppl who cant actually make it in the world indepently
<keanugirl> I dont know how the heck im gonna go back in sept and teach the kids to have faith
<Alcar> keanugirl - Teach them to have faith in humanity. If they can pull off that little trick, everything else'll be easy :)
<Alcar> "But, how can we havwe faith in a god who floodd the world and destroyed cities?" "You have faith in humans who destroy the ozone layer and rain forests, right?" "Oh, right."
<Alcar> See? :)

(Quit: I'm going nucking futs.)

<aslhk> Forest`: that's okay. He probably doesn't really have a girlfriend either!
<N-Lujan> aslhk I cannot afford a girlfriend
<N-Lujan> I have to save for africa

(Quit: With each moment comes a new rebirth, a new chance for change. With each moment comes a new death, a new chance for completeness. These are small miracles, but it is through this dance of being and becoming that all other miracles are made possible.)

sexual disorder = not getting any ? :P

(Quit: the exercise of cruelty is the antidote to fear -- James H. Schmitz)

I thought the point of IRC was simply to get on # (just plain #, 'dalnets blackhole for all who don't know) and instruct all the Guest4211's to press Alt + F4 to get instant porn..

<BaliNWN> ah shoot. i saw it, but i've gotta update :)
<BaliNWN> jussa second.
* BaliNWN blinks
<BaliNWN> ooookay. now it wants me to download 2.7 megs more! jeepers.
<BaliNWN> oh. how sad.
<BaliNWN> the first update was to update my updater.

<cutechina> i seen ghosts too
<cutechina> but i have also seen angels with wings
<[francesca]> So if they have wings, they're angels, and if they don't, they're ghosts?
<Alcar> Fran - then what are the ghosts of birds? :)

If Jesus is the only link between men and God what's the bible except another potential idol?

* yetifemme burns a scrafice to Typonos

literal-mindedness is a sign of mental retardation

"you can't change somebody's opinion by convincing yourself that you've won an argument with them"

best banner ad I ever saw: "Jesus hates you. Click here for porn."

<Forest`> no personal insults
<Forest`> we have few enough rules in here, sheesh, its not that hard to follow them
<VanRonson> I'm sorry.
<barking_frog> Forest`: petty tyrant! ;-)
<Forest`> i like that title :)

<jbc> First, imagine that your city were run by a tyrant - one who demands that the people bow down in the street when he passes, speak only well of him - and has people who fail to comply dragged off to his torture chambers
<jbc> were a person to be brought before him, what would be the moral values associated with the following four actions:
<jbc> a:) spitting in his face and getting dragged off
<jbc> b:) keeping your head down, your mouth shut, and your hatred secret
<jbc> c:) begging for mercy
<jbc> d:) loving him with all your heart, awed by his power

<qaisoon> so if a religion gave evidence and proves that it is right then a ratinal person should acpect it
<Alcar> qaisoon - I've yet to find any evidence to support the notion that humans are rational.

<qaisoon> I am here just to see how many r confuse and looking for the meaing of their existence
<qaisoon> and help anyone who is seeking for help
<qaisoon> because I know millions , of people are confuse in this life
<qaisoon> guys , it is the time to woke up :)
<Alcar> qaisoon - We're all awake. That's how we're typing.

(Quit: Bury me in velvet dream lest I unduly wake, and seek to reconcile my thirst with the cowardly tailors of my fate. Unleash mastiffs of snarling night to overthrow, plague and burn, as slumber lures me 'mongst the dead, to scheme of my return.)

* [francesca] starts a really huge bonfire
* Forest` throws some bones into the bonfire
* Alcar tosse a few bodies on
<[francesca]> Alcar Do we have a little homicide problem, maybe?
* [francesca] watches Alcar drag all the dead bodies from his basement
<Alcar> Fran, fran fran .. don't you see? homicide isn't the problem, it's the solution!

A quick question... if one's drinking on a mud they're playing, and drinking IRL, is that not a good idea, or just really good RP?

6* Got_Tass proposes a new game
<Got_Tass> dance dance revolution mixed with an old Mexican folk lore
<Got_Tass> Dance Dance chupacabra
<Got_Tass> a game where you dance and suck out the insides of goats to modern day pop tunes!

<Rynald_Lucero> what makes any one want to be in a religion
<Ryft> If the alternative is being like you, the answer's obvious.

every woman loves a guy who admits to keeping porn, becus then she knows he has enought to shair with her

I propose that all Drunk Drivers be round up and put on the same small stretch of road together. Admission could be charged to fund compensation for victims of drunk drivers. We shall call it "Drunk Driver Derby"

my favourite line is "*looks down* ... well, either I'm male, or I need emergency cosmetic surgery right NOW"

Prove to me that the universe exists, and I'll believe

<Forest`> i made scones one time with currants and my friend was eating one and she says, "these are nice with the raisins" and i said, "those aren't raisins" and she spit it out and nearly threw up before i had a chance to say they werre currants
<aslhk> Forest`: did you learn your lesson from that experience!?
<Forest`> ...that i'll have to try that again on another friend :D

"2 cats available free to a good home. Bilingual"

<aslhk> is a karma policeman anything like a quantum mechanic?
<karma_policeman> I just like radiohead and believe in karma
<aslhk> I think a lot of quantum mechanics like radiohead, but the quantums get upset when they listen to music too often.

<kimmiebum> She informed me today that she would never, in the nine levels of hell, be my girlfriend. I'm pretty sure that she is gay.
<CrazyCharlie> lol
<kimmiebum> I mean, who wouldn't want to be my girlfriend?

To call this world "illusion", to me, is simply to slap another label on it--it doesn't change anything I know about it. And why should it? I know there's no fundamental explanation of these real entities anyway, because an explanation of a thing is different than the thing itself

They say beer is an acquired taste. I don't see why I should acquire it.

* barking_frog can type 30wpm without actually touching the keyboard

<yetifemme> of course. she's not responsible for her actions ;p
<Ryft> What actions? This is IRC.
<Ryft> It's just TEXT.
<yetifemme> in the same way that spoken words are just noises ;P

<Alcar> Primordian - yeah, but if being outsiders if what atracts people to your group, it's hard to mantain that once you become mainstream and accepted.
<|337C4Bb4g3> Alcar: That depends on the exclusiveness of the group
<|337C4Bb4g3> If you let anyone join at random, then yeah, there will likely be some problems
<barking_frog> you could always invent an enemy. Like... say... terrorist countries in the middle-east
<|337C4Bb4g3> barking_frog: Oh, that's too far-fetched!
<|337C4Bb4g3> ;b

<barking_frog> I just signed an insurance policy for my new house, and it's amazing the dumb shit that's in there. I'm paying money to make sure I'm covered in case some moron slips and falls on my sidewalk. I mean... that's natural selection in action. I don't see why I should be liable if some fool doesn't understand that you don't run when the sidewalk's wet
<|337C4Bb4g3> barking_frog: It IS natural selection, but not like you might like to think... stupidity is rewarded with vast sums of money, remember?
<|337C4Bb4g3> E.G. Chainsaws that read: Warning: Do not try to stop moving chain with hands or genitals.

<|337C4Bb4g3> It's interesting the way the culpability lies with the maker of the product, rather than the individual who misused it
<|337C4Bb4g3> Imagine if religions were like that

personally, I think we should settle the whole thing with a blanket warning on the first page of every reading manual used in public schools. "Warning: This is real life, and you're going to be an adult someday. Start thinking. Soon"

<Jestarius> how did my come from childrean and religion, to relative morality?
<[francesca]> Jestarius Conversations just evolve sometimes :-)
<Alcar> [francesca] - Even for extreme Creationists? :)
<aslhk> Alcar: so long as they don't come from monkeys!

<aslhk> There's a book called e-mails from God in our bookstore
<aslhk> it's pretty bad =P
<Alcar> Hello Bob. I tried to email you earlier but your ISP thought my email was spam. As your providers are now going to be in a lot of trouble, maybe you could conmsider changing ISPs?"

I think that the universe was created because God made a bet, someone said, "If you're omnipotent, then create something you can't destroy." So he created the universe. then they said, "You can't destroy it, so you're not omnipotent." And so God created Humans

<mwboy> I actually get offended by xian friends that don't try every so often
<mwboy> I figure if they really do believe and they don't try to save your soul, they must not really think much of you

<aslhk> so wrong is alawys not synonymous with immoral. However, it is always synonymous with immoral when used in a moral context
<Apsu> Yep.
<Apsu> Gotta love our language.

<Drogheda> i was born as christian
<Drogheda> i learned it from primary school
<Drogheda> i should know something
* Alcar was born as a human being .. but I'm still not an expert on them
* Alcar envies Drogheda for his expertness

I probably would still be a christian had there been any cute girls in my church

<Mike^`> ohh new cpu here 1.8 gigaherdz 40 gigabites 256 ddr flatscreen 16/48 dvd rom 18-24-40 cd burner : P I KICK ASSSSS
<Iota> 2.0ghz, 120gbspace, 1gb ddr, flatscreen, 48x48x40x24 dvd/cd-rw, 24x12x40 cdrw
<Reykemias> i saw a 1.2ghz 40gb 256mb RAM, i forget the monitor, but that's unimportant....$400
<Alcar> Bah, you all suck! 100mhz, 1.3gb, 16mg RAM, 28.8 Modem. Eat your hears out!

0 must be something, because everything is something. Even void is -something-. There is not a thing in existance that is not -something-, so therefore, 0 cannot be nothing, so it must be at least 1, and so therefore all the other numbers must be off too, so perhaps 2+2=5

Quit: Look up! Sparkling, shimmering, twirling, exploding CLUE BEARS are parachuting from the sky! And they've got a ninety-foot-long OCCAM'S RAZOR!)

<Caltak> yeah, signh a peace treaty with a giant lizard, I dares ya.
<Alcar> Caltak - Easy. It's called a nuke :p
<Caltak> see thats the beauty of it, if there are several, if they want to use enouhg nukes, it's gonna bring about nuclear winter. so either they figure out something else, or doom everyone with that. either way... problem solved.
<Alcar> What's this everyone? "Sir, we need to cause a nuclear winter to take out the Giant Monsters. Howevfer, this failsafe plan will allow the government, then top 10% of the population in terms pf IQ and the super models to all live together in this secret underground base. The rest of population might not agree with these recommendations, but who cares? They'll all be dead."
<|337C4Bb4g3> super models because they use so little food ;b

<Alcar> I don't think immortality would make people any less stupid...
<|337C4Bb4g3> I don't, either ;b
<Alcar> but maybe a bit more inclined to think before they act.. depends on the type tho. It could be less :p
<Alcar> Well, it could. If you can't be hurt from anything, or ever really die .... why learn (especialy if it;ll all be outdated - it might actually create a society that didn't *want* to learn or advance) .... or even why bother growing up?
<Tonitrus> On the contrary.
<Tonitrus> Make them immortal, but not invulnerable.
<Tonitrus> The stupid will weed themselves out.
<Alcar> and then you'd be left with a race of cowards, perhaps - people not willing to take chances, or risks
<Tonitrus> Alcar: Do you mind? I had a perfectly good solution. Shoot down ideas elsewhere :P

birth or creation is just a reorganization of what always existed.

I believe there is the manifest (universe=everything) and the unmanifest (the source that gives birth to the manifest) and that the unmanifest is God "being" and the manifest is what God is doing

Ask your self this. If God did not exist could anything else?

we break God apart everytime we see our daily lives as real

<Gemm> ?? genie Is there really an Alcar?
<Answerbot> genie: Gemm, God himself could not make me say yes!
* AlcarGM blinks
* AlcarGM wonders if I should feel hurt :p
<Gemm> ?? genie Should Alcar feel hurt?
<Answerbot> genie: Gemm, you bet

I think that someone must have surveillance equipment set up in my living room, because every once in a while, someone on the TV will tell me what channel I'm watching. That really freaks me out, you know?

like those maps in malls..with the arrow "you are here"..how can they know that??

This is our hell, this is our paradise. It's called earth, and it's what we deserve because we're the one's making it.

<AlcarGM> ahmdullah_leb - What is a soul?
<ahmdullah_leb> do u hav fuses in our bodys
<yy2bggggs> ahm: No fuses in our body. That wouldn't make sense--who would change the fuses? If something blows in our body, it's just gone.

<ahmdullah_leb> A_L_L_A_H
<Pistorius> ahmdullah_leb: you say allah, i say ALL.
<Pistorius> ;)

i do love being in a century that allows one to see baseball players thanking the deity for an RBI...

saw my jewish friend the other day..he has been studying zen...he was with this high school principal..a really bad golfer...i greeted him thusly.."hiya, zen 'berg..and your uncertain tee principal"

The Arabs and the Jews should undergo forced cross-breading programs

<SKAndinavo> - wazup -
<SKAndinavo> - i am the antichrist -
<AlcarGM> SKAndinavo - You and the whole human race, eh?

<ahmdullah_leb> i lover hitler
<ahmdullah_leb> 4 wat he did
<ahmdullah_leb> 2 save islam
<Tonitrus> ahmdullah_leb: Is it so much to ask that you type out the fucking words?!
Tonitrus> It's "I love Hitler for what he did to save Islam." One fucking sentence. There are no numbers in that sentence. And it all fits conveniently on the same fucking line.

<Pistorius> why do muslims keep missing the points made of peace made in their own bible?
<AlcarGM> Pistorius - For the same reason Christians do?

This is how Hitler came to power... he attacked the grammatical sub-cultural anti-feministic neo-romantic sublanguage of the pre-postmodern era

(Quit: If you turn on the light quickly enough, you can see what the darkness looks like...)

<Alcar> 'I'm sorry you lost your job / I hope you got fired / Since as a CEO / You'd make enough to be retired."
* Alcar is starting to scare myself..
* aslhk comforts Alcar
<aslhk> you could do it!
<Alcar> Scare myself? But I do that already!
* Alcar does think marketing cards to nations would be cool, tho :)
<Alcar> For the mid-east peace confences: "I hope your marriage is really swell / Since you're already mastered divorce so well."

<mwboy> topic: civil war re-enactment, stupid or cool?
<James_Valentine> stupid
<James_Valentine> the south always loses anyway

<After-Life> Kids today are smarter then their parents in some cases...
* Alcar actually doesn't think kids are smarter .. if anything, they're less since there is more to know :)

<James_Valentine> and I have proof that Im a genius too, man. Im crazy! all the great geniuses were atleast a bit crazy, man
<Alcar> Everyone is crazy, so that arguement doesn't hold :p
<James_Valentine> I mean CRAZY
<James_Valentine> fuckin schizo!
<James_Valentine> I hear things!
* Alcar hears things to! People speak to me.
<Alcar> It's scary.

<James_Valentine> and all my friends are imaginary so...
<Alcar> Almost all friends are.
<Alcar> Or at least they become so after they owe us money.
<Alcar> From a religious standpoint you'd probably never get saved by God if God owed you money.

*** Caltak is now known as Caltak{GTA3}
<Caltak{GTA3}> msg me if anything interesting happens :p
<aslhk> Caltak{GTA3}: even if it's not on irc?!?

*** AlcarGM changes topic to 'An anthropologist once asked a Hopi who so many of his people's songs were about rain. The Hopi replied that it is because water is so scarce. Is that why so many of your songs are about love? - Gregory McNamee'
<IaMmObEtTaThAnU> That would explain why we don't have any songs about idiots



* Sintaqx once had a monopoly on evil, but the DoJ made me reveal my sources.
<Alcar> Maybe infinity is just an optical illusion? :)
<Alcar> "It seems to go on forever, daddy!" "Oh, don't worry, that's just mirrors."

<Alcar> Imagine a novel with subtitles ...
<Alcar> either footnote everything or have half the page be the original language and the bottom half the translation. Line by line would be cool, too.
<CrypticDeva> I like the idea of having the original first-draft and final edited published version side by side ;b

<CrypticDeva> You never exclaim anything out loud when surprised?
<Kristin_Hartnett> thats fine
<CrypticDeva> But you said that it was weird!
<CrypticDeva> Are you changing your story?
<Kristin_Hartnett> do you really give a shit?
<Kristin_Hartnett> cause I don't
* Alcar thinks everyone gives one.
<Alcar> If not, they might need medical attention :)
<Alcar> well, depending on how often they do....

<CrypticDeva> Because you know that if there weren't truth in what I say, that it would not move you so.

<CrypticDeva> Lilite: So it IS possible to respect people who have beliefs you consider silly.
<Lilite> CrypticDeva: Perhaps, but not very much :) For instance, I have a 'friend' who believes that he summons demons and is the reincarnation of Lao Tzu.. among being a vampire and various other wacky things.. and I don't think too many people respect him
<Kantizuni> Lilite: You promised not tell them about my personal life!!
<Lilite> lol Kantizuni

<DudemanBubba> how about evolution versus creationistic views
<AlcarGM> Could do that. What's your view?
<DudemanBubba> i believe that we are all just here... we just happened... no greater plan, etc.
<CrypticDeva> Which one is that? =)

<philyah> I'm about to fall asleep on my keyboard.
<Nevaeh> philyah, and you're here despite that knowledge.
<Nevaeh> First sign that you might be an addict.
<AlcarGM> Nevaeh - Whats the 2nd? :p
<Nevaeh> AlcarGM, Interest in the 2nd.

* Alcar shrugs. Eventually the government will realise the drugs can't be beaten. The only way to deal with them is to remove the demand for the supply and kill off a lot of American citizens
<Alcar> That way, the war on drugs is won!

<`Roder> 16 yo's can choose to fuck who they want
<kaleb> yeah, but the law thinks differently
<`Roder> very
<kaleb> however, since all gay sex is illegal in texas, i should be able to fuck as many 16 year olds as i want, cause i'll be breaking the law either way ;p

<meerkat> `Roder: Straight, bisexual, or gay?
<Alcar> Or all of the above?
<meerkat> You can't be all.

<Caltak> Chatter1: "ASL?" Chatter2: "16, M, Under 5th Street."
<aslhk> lol
<Alcar> Chatter3: "hk." :p
<Caltak> ..?
<Alcar> "asl" "hk"
* aslhk nods
<Caltak> o i get it :P
<Alcar> good :p
<Alcar> Can you explain it to me? :) Especialy the hk part.

<SilverHorse> I screwed up a guys order today
<Caltak> how badly?
<Dural-Cancer> bad enough u got in trouble?
<SilverHorse> Lets just say The and the buttons are fairly close together

<Tandaco> animals suffer pain, achievment is just an ego wank, love is a disease
<jbc> you can find love in millions of places. Look at a dog, and tell me it doesn't love
<Mirr0rMage> Hmm.
<Mirr0rMage> I had believed that until now. Now that Tan has said it too, it is so hard to agree with...

<My_NaMe_Is> any questions regarding Islam plz !ping Me!
* AlcarGM has a question. Why do people who always ask that feel compelled to never type the word please?

<Tonitrus> When you get down to it, though, "science" doesn't say anything, nor does "religion"
<Tonitrus> They are both too abstract to use in that way.
<Tonitrus> You end up with intense generalizations no matter what you say when you use them in that way.
<Tonitrus> The only thing is, for whatever reason, people assume that the words carry more weight then they do.
<Tonitrus> No one gets pissy over religion warring with creativity (or science and creativity, or creativity and insight), et cetera..
<Alcar> Maybe we should for a change? :)
<Tonitrus> lol
<Tonitrus> Creativity interferes with insight!

<RadioRaheem> I like how, as an undergraduate, you read one book and then you're the world's expert on everything
<RadioRaheem> but its better than being completely apathetic
<Allegro> I dunno...apathy is fairly rampant here on MIRC :)
<Alcar> Like we care, Allegro.

<Onryo> hmmmmm, if only I were a dog . . .
<Alcar> We're all someone's dog at the end of the day.
<Onryo> hmmmm, I ended my day yesterday as a person . . .
<Alcar> What's a person?
<Onryo> not a dog

<CrypticDeva> Onryo: Oh, and btw, you spelled your nick wrong, retard.
<Onryo> I spelled my nick wrong? How should it be spelled (I dare to ask . . .)
<CrypticDeva> Onryo: R-E-T-A-R-D

<SilverHorse> http://silverhorse.0catch.com/poetry/hammer.html
* Alcar blinks. Copywritten into years that haven't happened yet? :)
<SilverHorse> Yep
<SilverHorse> I do'nt plan on editing the site for a while
<SilverHorse> :P

<CrypticDeva> alt-f4 is infinite ammo
<CrypticDeva> "God ran out of bullets long ago!" <--- agree or disagree, and why?
<Alcar> and registering a channel, then adding *!*@* to the op list, and memoing the channel about some spam product is god mode :)

<PLSGIMMEOPSKTHX> they have something called "Magnetic Poetry" or some such
<PLSGIMMEOPSKTHX> it's a bunch of little words written on a magnetic substance
<PLSGIMMEOPSKTHX> so, assumably, you arrange them into poems
<PLSGIMMEOPSKTHX> there's an "Erotic Edition"
<PLSGIMMEOPSKTHX> very amusing!
<Alcar> What, they write them on condoms intead?
<PLSGIMMEOPSKTHX> Alcar: no, the words on the magnetic thingies are like "cock" and "throbbing" and such
<PLSGIMMEOPSKTHX> voluptuous, you know
<PLSGIMMEOPSKTHX> pr0n words
<PLSGIMMEOPSKTHX> or romance novel words!
<Alcar> "Now, dear, this isn't funny! Do you knwo what this is doing to my self esteem if we're about to have sex and you're getting a freaking magifying glass out?!" "Oh, shut up, I want to read the poem on your comdon." "...."

<Kristin_Hartnett> i'm in love with somebody, it's kinda nice except for the unrequited part
<Tandaco> Kristin_Hartnett: know what that's like... it sucks more than anything else
<Kristin_Hartnett> well, i'm sort of vague about the unrequited thing

<o____o> Why is it the guy thats always to make the first move?
<Kristin_Hartnett> cause girls like to be chased
<o____o> So do guys
<Alcar> Then why do they enter the olympics for long distance running? They'll never get caught that way!
<Alcar> SOmething is seriously flawed here...
* o____o smacks the Alcar
<o____o> You so cheeeeeeesy tonight
* Alcar nods. I'm swiss. Well, at least I'm full of holes.

<o____o> Kristin, complimenting physical features only gets guys slapped
<Kristin_Hartnett> not if it's something non-sexual like hair or eyes
<o____o> Actually I'd never hit on a girl who "looks like she's spent a while on her hair"
<Tandaco> "that shit on your head looks beautiful. do you wash?"
<Kristin_Hartnett> even nails or elbows, feet
<Kristin_Hartnett> well, maybe not feet, she might think you're a freak
<o____o> I stay far far away from high maintenance ladies
<o____o> Kristin, I've found that the non-physical works best for me
<Tandaco> "has anyone ever told you you have the most attractive pancreas i've ever seen?"
<Alcar> "Hi, I think your hair folicle engineer did an excellent construction job on your, uh, folicles on the top of your head. They're very retina-attrative. Did I mention that you seem to have really nice teeth and your skin tone seems to show an exceptional red blood cell count?"
<Alcar> Look for whats on the inside :P
<o____o> Its whats inside that counts, and we're all ugly when you remove the skin.
<Tandaco> "wow... i love intelligence. can i have your brain when you die?"

<CrypticDeva> aslhk and I were joking around about going and applying for really crappy jobs and seeing how silly we could make the interview ;b
<CrypticDeva> they always ask things like: So why do you want this job?
<CrypticDeva> Even though it's a crap job that NO ONE would want
<CrypticDeva> "Well, Bob, let me tell you: I've always wanted to be a tool of the conspiracy, wasting my life in some pointless, mindless, lousy, dead-end job for crap pay! This has been my dream, ever since I've been a small child! In fact, I wrote a poem/song about it... *stands up and recites really bad poem/song*"
<CrypticDeva> Alternatively, you could go in and randomly deny that the illuminati exists, and start saying things like: I buried my in my backyard the other day *wink* So when is your underground agent going to contact me?
<Alcar> "I aapplied to become a wage slave at this McDonalds in order to find out why postal workers who have decent, better paying jobs with benefits come into work one day with a gun and shoot everyone. Incidentally, do you know there is a firing range just two blocks away and I can buy a pistol at Walmart if I work here over 2 months?"

<Onryo> Are you all well?
<aslhk> I am rarely certain what I am referring too, either
<Tandaco_ditched> i am indeed... apart from a small migraine from smoking newsprint
<Onryo> smoking newsprint? kids these days stop at nothing for a thrill. I thought frolicking was your pastime . . .
<Tandaco_ditched> what planet are you from? i ran out of cigarette papers and couldnt find a bible
<Alcar> a bible? LOL
<Tandaco_ditched> Onryo: yes, but i couldnt be stuffed
<Tandaco_ditched> Alc: they work... thin paper, gives off a bluish flame

<stoneygrl> okay wait i wouldn't fuck animals
<stoneygrl> only mike jackson
<stoneygrl> oh jesus
<subgumby6> would you have sex with animals if say 50 bucks was involved?
<stoneygrl> fuckin irc
<stoneygrl> this is what i get for being a hermit
<stoneygrl> nope
<subgumby6> are you stuck on irc?
<stoneygrl> never ever never ever ever never
<stoneygrl> but glass bottles are another sub
<stoneygrl> i'm stuck on fuckin earth
<stoneygrl> with pretension slobs like u
<stoneygrl> no wonder i'm a case
<subgumby6> how big of a glass bottle we talking?

* jjbc notes that the invisible man would be the ultimate porn star

<stoneygrl> i'm sorry i'm being a major bitch
<stoneygrl> i'm raggin hard
<subgumby6> i feel like im on mind vacation right now
<subgumby6> i dont care, i deal with bitches day long
<jjbc> you're a vet, subgumby6?

<Chaos`^> My college english instructor tells me if I die I have to call her to get my assignments =(
<Chaos`^> she says if I can't do that I have to call her as soon as I'm resurected

<Kinkaid|> the idea of a universe is that there isn't anythiong outside of it.
<Alcar> Kinkaid - Uhm.....
<Alcar> Since when?
<Alcar> I suppose you've never heard the theory that universes mate, or that black holes send the energy they "take" to other universes so universes are parasites of each other?
<Kinkaid|> dont start this multiverse junk
<Alcar> What makes it junk?
<Kinkaid|> its a completely unproved theory, and shouldn't be any example
<Alcar> The idea that there is just one universe is unproved as well.
<Kinkaid|> then dont try to prove and unproved theory with another unproved theory
<Kinkaid|> it doesn't make sense
<Alcar> Nothing makes sense if you think about it.
<Kinkaid|> I try not too

<CrypticDeva> anal-retentive, self-absorbed, and too ignorant and delusional to do any harm
* barking_frog nods
<Alcar> Probably all that's saved the world from utter destruction
* Alcar grins
* barking_frog cries a little
<CrypticDeva> lol
<CrypticDeva> or utter salvation ;b

<CrypticDeva> amazon.com tried to sell me a 'hole shooter' for
<CrypticDeva> What do they take me for?!
<aslhk> what in the world is a hole shooter?
<CrypticDeva> i don't know
<CrypticDeva> and I am much happier for it, I'm sure

<ArthurQ> I seriously think that we should only allow highly qualified teachers, scientists and engineers into the country that have already been trained and have potential to creat more jobs. Then only allow tourists here to spend money. No work visa's or 6 month visa's or education visa's
<ArthurQ> No more of this "marriage into the country"
<ArthurQ> if you marry someone, go live in THEIR country.

<Tandaco> anyone know of any missionary positions going?
<Alcar> going where?
<Tandaco> doh... my genius pun is wasted here :PPP
<CrypticDeva> Tandaco: a/s/l?
<CrypticDeva> ;)
<Tandaco> 3,216/hermaphrodite/north pole

<barking_frog> personally, I don't think that it's possible to determine whether or not reality is objective or subject, but I don't see how anybody could ever "see" objective reality, since "seeing" it renders it subjective
<Alcar> Objectivity is subjective :P
<barking_frog> Alcar: stfu :-P
<Alcar> stfu?
<barking_frog> Alcar: you don't know that one?
<Alcar> nope, don't think so.
<barking_frog> Alcar: [s]hut [t]he [f]uck [u]p :-)

<CrypticDeva> If you won't be a better person tomorrow than you were today, what do you need tomorrow for? <--- To put off what I can do today ;b

<ArthurQ> hey....whats the song from Ghost busters 2
<ArthurQ> when the statue of liberty is walking
<Baliadoc> good question. i can't remember.
<Alcar> "Hey Pretty Lady, Show Us Some Leg?" :P

<paledream> What may be my downfall: i think of too much at once, & get sidetracked extremely easy. Take, for example, my general web browsing pattern: 50+ windows open, most of them all to do with different bits of knowledge/disciplines
<barking_frog> paledream: "anal," "cumshot" and "group" don't count as different disciplines

<Reykemias> i know you're julie, i'm around here enough. reykemias is a character i haven't used for a long time. my nick isn't my character, it's me...since i generally am myself around here
<Veronica_Velvet> so.. what is your real name.. if you wish.. so i can identify you as a person as well
<Reykemias> i don't have one :-p

* Alcar thinks it's a buge coincidence that some grey matter not even a yard/meter accross can conceive of universes billions of light years across. How do you explain THAT as a random by product of human evolution :p "Well, those aniimals run awfully fast.."

<Sintaqx> I copy and pasted the pages from the SRD into the script box and told it to do what it should.
<Sintaqx> unfortunately it did what I told it to do instead.

<CrypticDeva> Although with inflation being what it is, I am actually practically MAKING money off of my loans ;b
* Alcar blinks
<Alcar> That's a new one :p
<CrypticDeva> it's true ;b
<CrypticDeva> 6% inflation vs. 5.75% apr (deferred 3 years)

* CrypticDeva is trying to come up with a name for everything
<CrypticDeva> (that was a subtle pun! ;b)

* CrypticDeva wonders where all the virgins come from
<CrypticDeva> especially in a religion where guys get to have 4 wives
<Alcar> all those children Allah kils when they're young?
<CrypticDeva> muhammed married an 8 y/o, so I dunno about that ;b
<Alcar> aborted featuses (sp)?
<Alcar> NM, that's a bit too sick
<Alcar> "Well, they are virgins .... " "I want to go to a new heaven!"

<aslhk> and what about doing something enjoyable which will almost certainly get you killed?
<aslhk> is the purpose of life to get the greatest enjoyment over the longest period of time possible?
<Alcar> aslhk - Terminal Boredom = Enjoyment? :)
<Tandaco> aslhk: such as?
<aslhk> Tandaco: sky diving without a parachute
<aslhk> some people would find it exhillerating!
<aslhk> raping the mob boss's daughter!
<Tandaco> aslhk: that's suicide, not enjoyment
<Tandaco> rape isnt fun...
<aslhk> There are many examples of things which may be enjoyable to a person which could (and probably would) result in death
<aslhk> Tandaco: perhaps you do not feel that rape is fun, but there are many individuals (most of whom are in jail) who would beg to differ!

<Tonitrus> Life is a sexually transmitted disease that is always fatal.
<GeminiRai> Air is always fatal too
<GeminiRai> 99% of people who breathe air DIE less then 100 years after exposure, but that's not topically oriented
<Tonitrus> GeminiRai: Actually, air is fatal. It's really reactive. It shreds the lungs.

<Jeramias> But I doubt that other people are trying to figure out ways on how to spit water into their ears without turning their head.
<aslhk> you're probably right
<aslhk> can one use a fan?
<Jeramias> nope
<Jeramias> Nothing but a mouthful of water
<Jeramias> I can get it into both ears at once, actually. Probably not a useful tallent though.
<aslhk> that is amazing

<Dry-ice> my question is: if before jesus came only the jews could goto heave. who the hell are the non-jewish gods ?
<Alcar> other gods? :) Christianity just tells ppl not to worship other gods, not explicitly that they don't exist. If memory serves, I think thew quran does say that the other gods don't exist. Not sure.
<Dry-ice> ok, and what makes my sin (without jesus) any diffrent then a jews sin (without jesus) ? :)
<Alcar> lol. Because Jesus commands us to sin? I mean, if he died for them shouldn't we commit them to honour his memory?

<ManaKnight> Okay so I don't get this...
<ManaKnight> Superman died, and there were suddenly 4 supermen to take his place
<ManaKnight> Jesus dies... and we get 4 cheese pizza.
<ManaKnight> Similarities?
* Alcar doesn't see the link between jesus and pizza
<ManaKnight> 4 Jeaz pizza

<aslhk> but I don't want to make f00d!
<aslhk> This is almost like that part in Hamlet where he's like "to be or not to be" and such
<aslhk> perhaps I should go insane too!
<Alcar> "To make or not to make, that is the cook book.Whether tis nobler in the stomach to suffer the pains and cramps of a thousand failed recipes or take arms against a sea with tums and by opposing - end them!
<Alcar> Hamlet then goes to McDonalds
<Alcar> took a few secs to recall that speech :p
<aslhk> lol, the real one, or the one you just posted?
<Alcar> The real one :)
<aslhk> Alcar: *laugh* I thought so!
<aslhk> but I was also prepared to believe that you had, for some reason, invented the cook book speech before!
<Alcar> To go out, to cook no more. And by going out to say we end, the heartburn and thousand natural cramps the flesh is (hair too). Tis a constipatiomn not devoutly to be wished.
* Alcar isn't that weird :P

<Keith-Oni> oh well back to the sloter
<Keith-Oni> unless i am needed for some reson
<aslhk> we would never dream of interrupting a game of oni =P
<Keith-Oni> hay i just leaned the move that lets you spin around a guys neck like it was a stripper pole
<Keith-Oni> nice move by the way
<aslhk> that is *not* how I would've described it
<Keith-Oni> to bad it doesn't kill the pole in one run

<aslhk> there's a contest every year in which a number of chat bots and humans talk to a number of human judges
<aslhk> each guesses tells whether the "person" they talked to was a bot or a human
<FirestormZero> and so far the bots have failed every time
<aslhk> hah, they can't fail!
<aslhk> but that's not the point
<aslhk> one is said to "pass" the Turing Test if more than 50% of the judges think he's human
<aslhk> supposedly one of the human contestants failed

<Chaos`^> this is sung to a folk song right?
* Alcar has no idea
<Chaos`^> oh.. ok..
<Chaos`^> is there a beat to it or is it a poem untill you give it a beat?
* Alcar has no idea if it has a beat yet. Just tried to write a song :p
<Chaos`^> I see

* barking_frog thinks he came up through the manhole
* barking_frog realizes "The Manhole" would be an excellent name for a gay bar :-/
<[francesca]> That is very funny. And true!
<jbc> "excuse me, may I push in your stool?"

* jbc thinks all females should be bi, and the male population should be halved

* ArthurQ is starting to realize why there are so many cases of spousal abuse out there........its not cause of evil men......its all the fucking evil women that drive em nuts

<barking_frog> stupid question... if I'm on Windows XP, how do I know what user I'm logged in as?
<petrel> id
<petrel> jk
<barking_frog> oh... never mind ;-)
<barking_frog> I just saw the username spelled out in giant letters at the top of the Start menu :-)
<petrel> thats so stupid its funny

<kalvaan> what happened to the spirituality and philosophy discussions?
<barking_frog> kalvaan: they died
<barking_frog> kalvaan: you're welcome to take a shot at starting one back up ;-)
<kalvaan> what does it take? :)
<virgio> An attitude
<AlcarGM> depositing in my bank account?
* AlcarGM looks hopeful
<barking_frog> I'll do it for
<AlcarGM> I meant canadian tho!
* AlcarGM wins!
<barking_frog> AlcarGM: a hollow victory when I'm defeated because your currency is worthless :-P

<virgio> You can only claim that the way is to not proclaim the way if: (a) you're Taoist or (b) You have a bigassed grin on your face because you recognize, and fully enjoy, the irony/paradox in saying so....Of course, (a) and (b) usually overlap.
<virgio> Fark! I'm never going to be a guru with phrases like "bigass grin" :l
<virgio> "To see the centre of the souluniverse, my son, you have to sport a bigass grin."

<Kattelyn> the study of religion helps us to understand ourselves and what makes us tick
<Alcar> Too bad it won't tell us what makes us tock, too :)
<ShadowMistress> Alcar: u might wanna try jungian psychoanalysis to find out more about what makes us tock
* Alcar shrugs. IMO, it's silly anyhow. All analysis seems to boil down to is looking in a mirror for something and trying to be surprised that you find what you're looking for.
<ShadowMistress> i dont agree Alcar....so u always find what ure looking for ?
* Alcar would say we do. We just don't admit it to ourselves. It's not like we can analyse ourselves and find out stuff that goes beyond the system of anaylsis, and we make the system. Sort of a catch-22 I guess.
<Alcar> I mean, if I decide to analyse myself I can't find stuff that isn't there, not really. It would be loke figuring out what's in your hand. It doesn't change, but out perception of it might change (say, after discovering that there are lots of layers of skin, or whatnot)
<barking_frog> Alcar: the most fascinating thing about the sort of thing you just said is at first, it sounds like you must be a manic depressive. You have to dig into it before you realize that, no... it's only if you DON'T see it that you can be depressed
<barking_frog> Alcar: it's bloody well impossible to communicate that to people without sounding like you're trying to brainwash them

<aslhk> Alcar: you just did!
<ArtQ-AFK> ...dude....grr
* aslhk wins!
<Alcar> LOL aslhk. Good point :)

<ravetildon> anyone know how to apply the service packs to winxp and office xp that have been blacklisted?
<Alcar> Yes
<ravetildon> ?
<ravetildon> I'm listening very closely right now!!
* Alcar forgot it.

<Caltak> wow these two lions killed 138 men... there were Indian workers building a railroad through Kenya and these two lions were killing the workers and this hunter guy came in and eventually got them.. they said it mightve been because they had a weak/broke tooth, but they say they mightve been a genetic mutation because they had no mane, and they were larger, and were "abnormally intelligent and hard to hunt."
<Caltak> personally I think it just makes sense, I mean... If you find a food source thats a lot easier to kill, wouldnt it make more sense to hunt it instead? :) I mean really...
* Leech_Wilcomes wonders if they are just 2 lions who were shaved to see if they look like thoes furless cats.. and when they noticed they looked different the people who cought them were upset and shot them up on drugs and let them out

<Kristin_Hartnett> What do Budweiser and sex in a canoe have in common?
<James_Valentine> they both suck?
<Kristin_Hartnett> they're both fucking close to water
<RadioRaheem> they both are not conducive to multiple orgasms?

<SecretSamadhi> Kit, this physical world which this life opperates has many experences
<^Kit^> you don't say

* barking_frog feels that ordinary reality is plenty complicated enough without adding imaginary realities to it
<aslhk> barking_frog: I imagine your "ordinary reality" is primarily imaginary =-P
<barking_frog> aslhk: that's a good point :-P

<SecretSamadhi> and you dont have to believe me either Kit. :) you could just drop it :)
<aslhk> drop the universe?
<Alcar> On atlas.
<aslhk> I hope someone catches it before it gets away =P
<CrypticDeva> aslhk: I guess that lends new meaning to the phrase 'drop everything' eh? ;b

<Alcar> Hmm, I doubt anyone has all the answers. But most people seldom accept a differing world view that claims to have answers. And since neither view can be "proven" ....
<CrypticDeva> Alcar: I do! =)
<CrypticDeva> I steal all the good stuff that I can! ;)
<^Kit^> Alcar, that's why one should ask more questions than provide answers.
<CrypticDeva> Er, did I say 'steal?'
<Alcar> Kit - But that's the problem. Most people don't ask questions they don't want answers to. If someone asks "What is A?" They're generally really asking "what do *you* think A is" because they already have their own idea of it.
<CrypticDeva> IMO one would have to be a fool not to want to benefit from others' experience and wisdom, as well as ones own. =)

<aslhk> I would like to clarify something here: I am against all reproduction, not just human reproduction
<aslhk> I am even against photo-copying

<TheHellsAngel> aslhk so why not commit suicide?
<aslhk> TheHellsAngel: what does being against reproduction have to do with suicide? the damage has already been done!
<TheHellsAngel> the process to end can begin with yourself.
<aslhk> TheHellsAngel: why do you assume that I want to destroy things? Why not let them run their natural course before fading into nothingness?
<Alcar> TheHellsAngel - Naw. Better to just live a long life and get ahold of some nukes and take everyone with you. More effective :)
<TheHellsAngel> reproduction is a natural course.
* CrypticDeva makes a note to live FAR away from alcar =)
<Alcar> Suicide note no one will ever read: "Reproduce THIS!"

<CrypticDeva> Everything is natural =)
<Alcar> Except CrypticDeva.
<CrypticDeva> If it can occur, then it is natural
<CrypticDeva> Alcar: I am the exception that proves the rule! ;)
* CrypticDeva snickers

* Alcar has this horrible urge to say reproduction is unnatural because it violates the 2nd law of thermodynamics....
<Alcar> if the universe tends towards disorder than life, by creating order, is really a big middle finger to the universe and....
* Alcar stops now.

<Alcar> The Founain Of Youth, A Myth By Alcar
<Alcar> A father takes his sun to the Fountain ofYouth. "Son, this is the fountain." "All these old people?" "Yes." "But dad, they have breasts on the net." "Those are breasts, my son." "Oh. *gagging sounds*" "They digitally enhance the visuals on the net."
<Alcar> Later the man phoned his widfe. "Dear, you don't have to worry about Joe. He won't be having dates anytime soom. I took him to the Fountain of Youth Home For The Elderly."
<^Kit^> Alcar is silly but correct
<Alcar> It worksw for both Kit and aslhk's ideas! Not only are breasts the fountain of youth, they can also prevent reproduction
*Alcar sighs. I wonder if the Weekly World News is hiring. "Breats Prevent Reproduction" would be such a cool cover story.
<CrypticDeva> Alcar: They do if they're big enough! ;b

<MrPhysics> i missed the thing that prevents reproduction
<MrPhysics> what is it?
<Alcar> MrPhysics - Breasts.
<MrPhysics> oh
<MrPhysics> um well breast feeding delays ovulation
<MrPhysics> is that what you mean?

<Tandaco_> looks like Australia wont be going to war in Iraq with you guys....
<Tandaco_> we'll be declaring war on indonesian terrorists
<MrPhysics> oops now we will never win

<TheHellsAngel> I do not agree with alot of american policy.
<TheHellsAngel> but alot of it is unavoidable.
<TheHellsAngel> since there are no other solutions.
<TheHellsAngel> welcome to real life.
<TheHellsAngel> get a helmet.
<Tandaco_> bullshit... war is never a first option... bush is an absolute wanker for not going the inspections path
<Alcar> Bah. As long as people want to wave their phallic symbols at each other and stockpile weapons to promote "peace" and think peace has to be forced and never really want it, they'll make sure no other solution works.

<Alcar> Oh, gods that was fun...
<Alcar> <Alcar> Has it occured to people here that monsters are *made* not born? They get made by their society.
<Alcar> From the stuff I wrote for the 2nd lolad campaign :P
* Alcar finds this funny. I can turn a comment about a fictional were tiger into part of an anti-war rant.

<MrPhysics> christ had a messiah complex
<Alcar> LOL MrPhysics. I could see someone turn that into a book :P "Jesus: God or someone with a Messiah Complex?"
<MrPhysics> how are hitler and jesus alike? they both had a messaih complex
<Alcar> MrPhysics - We definitely have a potential novel here :)

<Alcar> TheHellsAngel - SO what? The war'll happne no matter if the people want or not want it. They're irrelevant.
<TheHellsAngel> yes it will Alcar.
<TheHellsAngel> and I both support it, and loath it.
<TheHellsAngel> such is the dichotomy of war.
<TheHellsAngel> you think I like death Alcar?
<TheHellsAngel> I come from a military family.
<TheHellsAngel> I dont want this war as much as you do.
<TheHellsAngel> but my personal feelings mean nothing when measured
<TheHellsAngel> to the acendency
<TheHellsAngel> of our race.
<Alcar> to the what? :p
<TheHellsAngel> continuing the human race.

<^Kit^> regis philbin frightens me.
<^Kit^> mostly it's the shiny ties. that can't be natural.
<^Kit^> I think he's wearing plutonium around his neck or some such thing.

<^Kit^> one has to anticipate a little... that's part of active listening but too many people are just waiting to talk. god bless chuck p
<Alcar> 'I am listening to you, so will you shut up and stop interupting me!"

* Now talking in #religion
* Topic is '|| Welcome to #religion ! || Does Love have an opposite? If so, what is it? ||'
* Set by Primordian on Tue Oct 15 12:34:27
* Alcar looks at the topic
<Alcar> Marriage.

<jbc> ... formulas explain the model, they don't cause reality
<jbc> they're the map, not the territory
<lifting_frog> and interestingly, if you factor in Godel, they don't even do that

* lifting_frog has found that indifference, or something very much akin to it, is the "secret" to peace

<Reykemias> i need a website with stupid online games that will amuse me for a short while
<Alcar> Reykemias - www.microsoft.com has a game called Internet Explorer. You get to see how many error messages you can send to them in a hour. Best player gets a free copy of netscape.

<Keith`> i've heard roomers of it running in parts of canada once a year or so
<ArthurQ> heh
<ArthurQ> "Invasion America" running in Canada...

<MrPhysics> remids me of when i was in chiropractic school and we were taking a urinalysis class
<MrPhysics> as a joke the whole class ate asparagus at lunch and the next day the lab stank to high heaven
<MrPhysics> the professor didn't laugh
<MrPhysics> he was wise to us

<MrPhysics> hehe we were all walking around with a vial of our own warm asparagus pee
<RadioRaheem> asparagus piss would be a good name for a band

<barking_frog> I went in to buy a pair of 16MB RAM chips for
<barking_frog> good deal!
<barking_frog> I didn't know much about computers at the time, so I asked a manager if they were returnable if I bought the wrong chips by mistake
<barking_frog> it was explained to me that I couldn't do that, 'cause I might take them home and copy them
<GeminiRai> copy ram chips?
<barking_frog> they had the cheapest price in town by a fair margin, though, so I went all the way to corporate until I got somebody to say I could return them
<barking_frog> and I had to! Three managers up to and including the store manager couldn't understand that they weren't software

<cooking_frog> ^^traxXx^^: we don't share our ideas about religion. We already KNOW the answers. We're just here to listen to people such as yourself, who come in seeking guidance
<cooking_frog> ^^traxXx^^: share your confused perception with us, and we'll set you on the true path

<Allegro> the original religion is probably the need to survive
<Alcar> That's almost too pragmatic to be a religion :P
<Allegro> but people are quite fervent in their passion about it when they are faced with death :)
<Allegro> and we have developed many rules and principles geared to keep us alive
<Allegro> and we are told that if we do not follow the religion (that is, we dont want to survive) then we must be crazy
<Alcar> So that could make the people who say we're crazy priests.. WHich means that either psychiatrists are modern priests or talk show hosts are
<Allegro> and we are told that if we do not follow the religion (that is, we dont want to survive) then we must be crazy
<Alcar> hehe. True.
<Alcar> So that could make the people who say we're crazy priests.. WHich means that either psychiatrists are modern priests or talk show hosts are
<Allegro> Alcar: talk show hosts are not human...they are a new species branching off from australiopithicus republicus conserva :P

<RadioRaheem> strangely, insanity has been a mark of divinity
<Alcar> RadioRaheem - Makes sense to me. What better thing to do with nuts than lock them in a monastery?

<Mickey^> but have you heard of the siamese twin, who had there bodies joined?
<Mickey^> now you might not believe in the law of cause and effect, but those two twins had there bodies joined because in the past life they were very attached to one another gay people, why do you see so many people with joined bodies these days?

<Mickey^> humans are not animals
<Mickey^> this is because humans have the technology
<Mickey^> within them to attain salvation
<Mickey^> and to overcome there worldly attachments
<Mickey^> and attain union with god
<Mickey^> however animals arent
<Mickey^> as they are instinct driven
<christy> I think having technology inside you makes you an unholy cyborg :/

<Mickey^> i am not christain
<Mickey^> i praise god

<Kristin_Hartnett> i was going to say it's pointless to worry about what another person does between the sheets
<barking_frog> Kristin_Hartnett: if you're the one who has to do the laundry, then I think it becomes something to worry about

<ArthurQ> oh wow....
<ArthurQ> I guess i was wrong then
<ArthurQ> Alright, scratch that advantage
<ArthurQ> The guys at nintendo are the dumbest living fucks alive
<Caltak> so in other words, you meant the Game Boy ADvance has the biggest game library in history :)
<ArthurQ> well....
<ArthurQ> i could still be right

<Keith`> so they took the biniary files of nes roms and printed them out??
<Keith`> no there has to be some fermware involved
<ArthurQ> Ferm?
<Alcar> stuff made in the amazon rain forest?
<Alcar> Oh, wait, that would be fernware

<aslhk> BagOfGroceries: how can you be so certain that not every girl hates you!?
<BagOfGroceries> Because there is at least one!
<aslhk> BagOfGroceries: those that seem not to hate you could just be attempting to get close to you to further their plans to cause you horrible pain and agony and the like
<aslhk> I saw it in a movie!
<BagOfGroceries> But while she's pretending to not hate me she'll develope real feelings of nonhate! That's how it works outside of the movies!

<En_Sabah_Nur> join the crowd Caltak
<Caltak> NEVER! I am an individual, and I swear to God, I kill each and every other person just to prove it!
<Caltak> er, ahem, pardon me.

<_Erich> god is just as real as a greek god
<_Erich> or a roman ora norse god
<_Erich> theres no proof he exists
<_Erich> seeing is believing
<Alcar> Erich - you just said god didn't exist. it hardly improves your arguement to say that god is just as real as other things that don't exist. Lots of things don't exist. Morr than do exist, really, if you take into account honour, justice, love and the like
<Alcar> believing is seeing more often than not.
<_Erich> convince me that there isa one true god
* Alcar never said I believed there was one true god, so why should I convince you said god exists?

<Allah^idDie4U-JIHAD> Faith isnt rational. its just something you belive or not. intelligence or stupidity has nothing to do about being an atheist or a beliver.anyway, one thing is for sure: Belivers are happier than atheists. if you belive in god you can live more peacefully. you dont ask your self about the meaning of life. you dont scare about the death, you have an explanation for everything.
<Alcar> What is rational?
<Allah^idDie4U-JIHAD> Of sound mind; sane.
<Allah^idDie4U-JIHAD> Consistent with or based on reason; logical: rational behavior. See Synonyms at logical.
<Alcar> So .. people are rational if they're of a sound mind. Who determines they are of sound minds? How can you prove the people making that determination are sane? It's an endless cycle.
<Dry-ice> Alcar: my shrink said something like "If you don't want people to think you're crazy. don't act crazy" :)
<Alcar> lol. Easier said than done :)
<Alcar> But the point of that was that nothing can really be said to be rational, if one is being picky.

<trompah_besi_II> God is the most compassionate and most merciful..those who repent and do good deeds will be rewarded and given paradises
<o____o> Its all reward punishment, like yer an obedient doggy
<o____o> not a man
<Alcar> But if god is all merciful he'll forgive us anyway because he made us and our natures. Forgivenes is his profession
<trompah_besi_II> ur His creatures..u have to obey His little rules, following the rules will distinguish between u and ur dog
<Alcar> Besides, dogs obey rules better than humans. Or is it just a coincidence that dog is just god spelled backwards?

<Tandaco> no... not the religion that states it.... the ANCIENT EGYPTIANS, not the religion, discovered Ra first of all gods... they were only following Ra for like 1000 years or so, then other gods came into it
<Tandaco> for that 1000 years it was Ra or nothing
<Tandaco> hence, Monotheism
<virgio> Tandaco: According to whom?
<Tandaco> according to shit written on walls and stuff... buggered if i know, from the history books
<virgio> Tandaco: Yeah. Sorry. That's not going to do it :-)

<SilverHorse> the VC RP board
<Reykemias> has it changed since i posted?
<SilverHorse> erm, was it bright pink when you posted?

<FirestormZero> who the hell are all these new people
<FirestormZero> why am i not an op and BagOfGroceries is?
<ArthurQ> ive been here longer then you FirestormZero
<FirestormZero> ok, you have seniority :)
<Baliadoc> so has BagOfGroceries ;)
<ArthurQ> cept she's fuckin alcar
<ArthurQ> least i think so
<ArthurQ> o.0
<ArthurQ> oh thats Jer?!
<ArthurQ> i though that was salem
<Baliadoc> AQ is utterly confused. this is fun :)
<Baliadoc> that was the most interesting way to explain how Jer got an op that i've ever seen :)

<jbc> Imagine you were ruled by some jumped-up little dictator with his 0 medals all over his uniform that has people dragged off to the torture chamber forever for daring not to love him enough...
<jbc> imagine you were called before him... imho, the brave man would spit in his face, the smart man would keep his head down and say 'yes, sir', and the crawling gutter-slime would fall at his feet in adoration
<jbc> wouldn't you agree, nev?
<Nevaeh> The cool man would offer him shrooms.
<jbc> No. nonono. You do NOT want god getting stoned.
<o____o> jbc, god isn't stoned?
<Nevaeh> Why not? You're just as well to be not the only having delusions. :P

<Alcar> did you know that the bible is against tongue piercings?
<Alcar> * TheScripts []KJV[] James 3:6 - And the tongue is a fire, a world of iniquity: so is the tongue among our members, that it defileth the whole body, and setteth on fire the course of nature; and it is set on fire of hell.
<aslhk> lol
<aslhk> interesting interpretation

<CrypticDeva> The insane often find exactly what they are looking for, wherever they look =)
<Alcar> CD - By that definition 99% of humans are insane.
<CrypticDeva> Alcar: I'm glad you noticed =)

<blue0ne> if I do not eat.. I get hungry
<blue0ne> thats my ulitmate reality

<Alcar> The apple/pc debate is even worse than most religious ones....
<aslhk> Alcar: it's fun because it never goes anywhere, and it's never done by people who know what they're talking about!

<CrypticDeva> aslhk: On the other hand, I'm not sure if emulating things that have tiny little brains, and oversimplistic behavior patterns is the wisest move ;b
<CrypticDeva> Although many people would disagree
<Alcar> CrypticDeva - You're saying that 100,00 lemmings are wrong?!
<CrypticDeva> Alcar: Oh, not the lemmings, just the OTHER animals
<CrypticDeva> I think most people SHOULD emulate lemmings

<Caltak> How do you fit an elephant in a subway?
<Alcar[semihere]> car or tunnel?
<Caltak> car
<Alcar[semihere]> how big is it?
<Caltak> you're um... really overthinking this...

<Baliadoc> true. some are much worse than others, though.
<Baliadoc> like National Things are Worse Than You Want Them to Be week.
<aslhk> I don't celebrate holidays you don't get off work for

<jbc> how many senses are there?
<Coris> Two. Sense and nonesense. :p
<MrPhysics> 2: common sense and book learning

<jbc> *shrug* I see no reason to believe in any conciousness or other organised entity that created or manages the universe
<MrPhysics> jbc: nor do i
<jbc> everything seems to be explainable on a cellular-automata model of a few simple rules - which physics attempts to uncover
<MrPhysics> all except why is there anything at all
<MrPhysics> which is a good question: why does anything exist at all

<MrPhysics> but seiously. life is more like a song than a journey. a journey has a purpose. to get to the destination. but for life, the destination is death. the purpose of life is not to die, but to live. just as the purpose of a song is not to get to the end . if that were ttrue then the best conductor would be the one who got to the end first.
<MrPhysics> and if the purpose of dancing were to get to a certains pot on the floor, you would just walk over there and stand
<MrPhysics> same with life

* spaceman5 is in a great mood
* Alcar is too. I beat my record for most consecutive days I've been alive
<TheShrike> Alcar, you should be a spokesperson for Alex Chiu's Immortality Rings... "I've worn a ring for a few days now, but I've been alive for (insert age here) years! It's so amazing! Thank you, Mister Chiu!"

<Caltak> "Jesus must go back to college... on a planet populated by lizard men." THis game is fun :)
<Caltak> ^that was a show idea I pitched. :)
<Alcar> err, for what? :p
<Baliadoc> lol
<Caltak> Primetime Pitch
<Caltak> its a fun game on pogo.com

<Alcar> Voice from the clouds: "Human 1.0, human 1.0 .. ah, there you are. Damn. Made a right mess of things, have we? TIme for a recall." voice fades "Wait a minute, *can* I damn myself?"
<Baliadoc> "Sorry guys, I really fucked up with this whole human thing. I'm gonna need you to all come back to heave and try again. Don't worry. I'll figure it out. I think I need to focus more on those lovable penguins. Smarter, faster penguins. Yeah."
<Alcar> "Hmm, oh my Me! I was in even worse shape when I made these than when I made that platypus. I need a drink."

<ArtQ-Sleepin> yet religion holds on to books that are thousands of years old......that contain mostly fictional stories of events that never happened
<ArtQ-Sleepin> Also......consider this!
<ArtQ-Sleepin> God cannot be a man!
<ArtQ-Sleepin> If god was a man, he'd be gay!
<ArtQ-Sleepin> Think about it
<ArtQ-Sleepin> What male entity in his right mind would create another male entity first!
<ArtQ-Sleepin> If god was male he would have created woman first!

<ArtQ-Sleepin> most religious leaders claim them ot be true
<ArtQ-Sleepin> Im still telling you
<ArtQ-Sleepin> If god exists
<ArtQ-Sleepin> its a bitch!
<ArtQ-Sleepin> no doubt about it
<ArtQ-Sleepin> Seriously!
<ArtQ-Sleepin> Only a WOMAN would send thousands of men to fight over HER name.

<JoShMiR> who knws abt religion
<Dry-ice> JoShMiR: anyone
<JoShMiR> umm
<JoShMiR> well ok
<JoShMiR> which religion is the true of them all
<Dry-ice> which ever one you want

<aslhk> I think it would be easy to 'make love' 15 times a day
<aslhk> that's like once an hour
<aslhk> and you get nine hours sleep!
<EmptyBag> Yeah, but it wouldn't be easy if I wasn't in shape.
<aslhk> I don't know
<aslhk> I think anyone could do a minor exertion once an hour
<EmptyBag> You wouldn't! Ha!
<aslhk> the 'Ha!' really made that comment
<EmptyBag> Minor? Maybe if you're only interested in pleasuring yourself. That's why you're unexperienced.
<aslhk> I thought studs were just supposed to be trying to get their partners pregnant
<aslhk> isn't that the meaning of the word? =P
<EmptyBag> Wait, I think you're confused. I was refering to supporting building walls.

<JoShMiR> i worship ALLAH almighty alone
<JoShMiR> and i bear witness that there is no god except HIM
<Dry-ice> allah... isn't that just god in a diffrent lang. ?
<aslhk> Dry-ice: sort of. It's more like "The One True God Who 0wnz J00"
<aslhk> obviously referring to the great script kiddie in the sky

<Alcar> Most people see evil as so prevalent and overwhelming they either have to make Satan bigger than the bible does, claim god is weaker than people think or actually take responsibility for their OWN actions. Most pick a :p
<Allegro> Alcar: true...reality it far to scary a choice..for it would mean being responsible for possibly making mistakes in life and risking the security that Satan brings when its really all his fault :)
<Dry-ice> I like how all temptation is the devils failt :)
<Alcar> Yeah. I think it sucks that the devil gets all the blame and god all the praise.
<Dry-ice> I don't blame god though, but it seem shadeing :)
<Allegro> or the devil gets all the praise for the fun stuff ;)
<Alcar> It's like miracles. "Oh, joey fell down the well and was unhurt! It's a one in a million chance!" is a miracle, while "The oil rig broke at the exact wrong moment and blew up, killing 30 people. It was one of those one in a million chances, officials said" is NOT a miracle. It's a bias that only the good stuff is miraculous.
<Alcar> lol Allegro. Good point :p

<EmptyBag> TV needs shows with fart jokes, apparently. Whatever.
<EmptyBag> It'll never change unless I take over the world
<EmptyBag> But that won't happen for another *looks at his watch* six minutes. And I'm not that patient!

<Alcar> god isn't infallible, at least not in the OT.
<turd_furgison> lucifer
<turd_furgison> one of his own angels
<turd_furgison> he is soposed to be all knowing
<Alcar> turd_furgison - That was part of the Divine Plan. Satan was manipulated.
<Alcar> God is really a CEO.
<turd_furgison> he should have known that lucifer would have turned against hiom
<Allegro> Chief Eternal Officer?

<turd_furgison> so why the hell do i deal with you
<ThomasGarner> turd_furgison: I think you were trying to prove that you think

<Munin> Allegro: either the person doesn't posses the data on a topic of which they speak, or the data they have is innacurate, incomplete, or simply wrong
<Allegro> I agree with that
* Coris thinks almost all people have the latter.
<Coris> And refusal to admit it causes most arguements :)
<Jestar> bah i admit that
<Munin> its a common condition, and usuall not noticible, that is unless the person is particularly stupid and chooses to talk about things as an authority when they lack a foundation
<Jestar> starting arguments is a good way to pass time
<christy> Jestar: you do not! :P
<christy> Jestar: Is not!

<Allegro> Munin: true...I try never to assume ;)
<Munin> Allegro: you do it all the time
<Munin> we have to assume many things, or we would spend all of our time disussing trivia
<Allegro> Munin: like I said...I try not too
<Munin> Allegro: no you don't
<Allegro> yes I do
<Munin> Allegro: you assume that when you type 'chair' that it means basically the same thing to me (or whoever you are addressing) as it does to you

<christy> in my envisionment, there's a blackboard with a crudely drawn stork on one side, a tangled mess of equations in the center and spilling around the margins, with a bold, frantically-drawn arrow pointing to a baby on the other side of it
<christy> and some kind of representation of the earth spiralling out of the orbit of the sun, UNLESS THE BABIES ARE STOPPED

<IrOnMiR> any one wana know abt islam
<IrOnMiR> clik me
<Alcar> \/me is sorry, I already have the one true religion
<Alcar> hail eris.
<IrOnMiR> how do u know its true?
<Alcar> Because She spoke to me through my pinneal gland

<Alcar> Oh, one thing: The..
<Alcar> _____________Man thinks of squirrels__________
<Alcar> Narrator: You know what you really want!
<ArthurQ> yea?
<Alcar> you know what you really want seems .... I don't know .... I thought of squirrel and nuts came to mind :)
* Alcar was wondering if it was some weird sex ad for a second :p
* Alcar doubts most people would, tho.
<ArthurQ> HAHAH!

<virgio> Alcar: Literature is a shifting category, true, but generally something has to be well-written to be considered so.
<virgio> Not just influential
<barking_frog> virgio: I dunno... take a look at Johnny Got His Gun
<virgio> barking_frog: I never heard of that, I'm sorry.
<barking_frog> virgio: Dalton Trumbo. It's an excellent example of poorly-written literature
<virgio> Eheh. I'll have to look into it, then.
<virgio> So I can disagree, of course :l

<jbc> if I had one[a hermaphrodite], and didn't assign - I'd raise them to revel in their differences
<Colm> how?
<Colm> Child: "Look what I brought for show and tell!" Teacher: "Oh my God!" Child: "But daddy says it's a good thing. I bet you don't have one!"
<jbc> LOL
<jbc> you know what I mean

* vorpalblade has left #religion
<TheShrike> hmm... but I didn't hear a snicker-snack
<Coris> 'twas a paddy wack. Budget cutbacks.
<TheShrike> hmm... yep, a new company bought the whole works, cut down all the tumtum trees, shot all the Jubjub birds, and now all the Bandersnatches are working in a Nike sweatshop
<TheShrike> I hear they're frumious about the whole deal, but they can't seem to get unionized
<Coris> and the old man is chortling in joy because he's making a killing off of tourism. And a certain pour boy is in jail because Jabberwoks were endangered and he has no weapon liscence for his vorpal blade

<barking_frog> petrel: isn't a skull crusher considered a curl?
<petrel> i never heard that term
<barking_frog> petrel: what kind of curl would you do to isolate your triceps?
* Kristin_Hartnett can't wait till exercise isn't "in" anymore

<Kristin_Hartnett> If you turn yourself on does that make you gay?
<petrel> nope
<ThomasGarner> hrm
<ThomasGarner> I think it does
<petrel> narsicistic
<ThomasGarner> or at least bisexual!
<ThomasGarner> yeah, but that doesn't mean you aren't gay, too
<barking_frog> do gay/bi people get hot looking at themselves?
<barking_frog> that seems kind of odd

<petrel> just because i think im beautifull that makes me gay?
<Colm> petrel - Of course
<Colm> I mean, how could you think that and NOT be happy?

<barking_frog> what I hate is when you pick a girl up at the bar and then you get her back to your place and find out she's really a guy
<barking_frog> I *HATE* when that happens
<ThomasGarner> barking_frog: hah! you just need to be a bit more open minded! =P
<barking_frog> ThomasGarner: that's what he said
<barking_frog> ThomasGarner: except he wasn't saying it was my mind I needed to open

<Allegro> we are talking from the perspective of our minds
<|337C4Bb4g3> I'm not, I'm just talking
<|337C4Bb4g3> My mind is busy with more important things

* aslhk is writing about the Alien Mind Rays which make our early memories fuzzy
<Alcar> aslhk - What are you ....
<Alcar> Uhm, what was that you typed?
<aslhk> Alcar: I am stating that the fact that most pre-schools attempt to make five year old children take naps at odd ours like 10am is indicative of aliens tampering with our minds
<aslhk> because no HUMAN would come up with such a ludicrous idea
<ArthurQ> its just so the teachers can go play cards
<ArthurQ> they make them sleep so they dont do any actual work
<ArthurQ> its perfeculy human
<ArthurQ> its called sloth!
<aslhk> lol! You think that getting a large group of children to take naps is *sloth*?
<aslhk> how many kids have you been around?
<Baliadoc> my sentiments exactly :)

<aslhk> [QworG]: you're comparing klingon to greek/latin? =P
<[QworG]> aslhk: Not that much of a difference
<aslhk> [QworG]: other than the wealth of classical literature and history available in the first two?
<aslhk> you, sir, are a sick man =P
<aslhk> Not much difference indeed.
<[QworG]> aslhk: Granted, yes there are differences of chronological nature but out a of any societal merit what else would be the difference?
<aslhk> I could see comparing klingon to Tolkien's languages or esperanto or the like
<aslhk> [QworG]: the point is that there is a wealth of information available to those who speak greek/latin which is not available to those that don't

* Alcar[afk] seriously wants to know how they'll make daredevil without offending every blind advocate group..
<Allegro> there are blind advocacy groups? as in advocate groups that are blind?
<barking_frog> Alcar[afk]: why do you think they'll be offended, rather than liking it?
<Alcar[afk]> because people get offended really easily
<RadioRaheem> well they can't even see the damn movie
<Alcar[afk]> "They're making light of his blindness! It's just a plot gimmick! He might as well be sighted because he does all they can, and better."
<Alcar[afk]> "Hey, you're right, he does! This is discrimination against people who aren't blind and get hit with chemicals because they'll just die!"
<barking_frog> RadioRaheem: maybe they'll release a braille version
<RadioRaheem> it may be offensive to portray blind ppl as those who cannot dress themselves appropriately, but repeatedly wear red pajamas everywhere
<Alcar[afk]> And we haven't evne gotten into the red devil imagery :)

<barking_frog> Nevaeh: talked to Rima last night... she caught up with me and gave me the message
<Nevaeh> Did she say she would stay gone?
<barking_frog> Nevaeh: she sounded like she was thinking permanent, but you know how that goes :-)
<barking_frog> Nevaeh: all us regulars belong in a 12-step program, on here ;-)
* Alcar joined a 12 step program, but it was interfering with irc so I had to quit it :)

<Nevaeh> We are all just jagged pieces of the same glass - broken by some stressed waitress calling herself God; therefore, some of us will fit together while others remain shattered.

<RadioRaheem> we could never successfully invade china
<RadioRaheem> nor hold N. Korea if they decided to poor troops over the border
<RadioRaheem> er pour
<Alcar> lol!
<Alcar> "We plan to poor our troups. We got the idea from Canadian military spending."

<DJ^Krush> kiffin1: Your claim that there is no truth, to contain any validity, you must assume to be true - see the contradiction there?
<kiffin1> nope
<Alcar> Just because it's a contradiction doesn't mean it's not true DJ^Krush!

<NeCrOsls> yes.some christian r uniterians but they dont accept mohamed as prophit
<islam-man> but u say
<islam-man> but we accept
<islam-man> jesus
<islam-man> muhammed
<islam-man> moses
<islam-man> we accept all
* Alcar accepts anyone as as a prophet, if they want to be. The standards don't seem very high :)

<DJ^Krush> Alcar: Religions all have a certain doctrine, and it is easy - even for an outsider - to discern when that doctrine is contravened
<Alcar> DJ^Krush - I'd disagree with that .... most do have some basic teneants, but it all lies in interpretation of them and their context and what you want them to mean.
<Alcar> Mind you, a militant buddhist would be really hard to justify, but it could be done I suppose...
<kiffin1> militant buddhist....lol
<Alcar> heck, you can justify anything in your mind if you're determined enough :)
<kiffin1> i would love to meet one of those
<DJ^Krush> Alcar: They mean what they mean, if your interpretation is false because of what 'you want them to mean' you only have yourself to blame
<Alcar> How can a interpretation be false - it's an interpretation :p

* Alcar thinsk the war on drugs will end when the US realises that the drugs can only be stopped if no one takes them and declares war on it's own citizens for using the drugs. No users = no use for the drugs.
<WarezBert> mass government tainting of all incoming drug products? what gets you high... gets you dead, today!

<kiffin1> i don't believe in hell or the devil/satan
<VanRonson> Ditching the bits that don't suit you, hmmm?
<kiffin1> yep, VanRonson that is exactly what i am doing

<Alcar> Most people decide they have to believe things they don't like, but they seem to end up finding a way to make it fit regardless .... by oftne changing what they don't like. Simply not believing the parts you don't like makes more sense to me :p
<jbc> alcar, that's the scariest thing I've heard in a long time
<Alcar> jbc - So that makes it true? :)
<jbc> heh. Twit.

<Alcar> The problem is that people seem to think self-delusion is a bad thing, when it's not. Everyone deludes themselves to some extent all the time. Say, that your signifigant other really loves you, the day at work wasn't *really* that bad .. and that's not evne getting into how we rewrite our memories.
* jbc wonders what the HELL planet he's on
<[francesca]> Many times what we decide is true actually becomes true for us
<VanRonson> YES.
<VanRonson> We do.
<VanRonson> That doesn't mean we should stop trying NOT to delude ourselves..

* Elana-Silvereye has joined #Game1
<Elana-Silvereye> I cant connect to Dal
* Elana-Silvereye Quit (Read error: Connection reset by peer)

<jbc> so, being omnipotent and having the power either to utterly destroy or completely isolate his greatest enemy... God instead sets him loose on his most beloved creations, there to tempt them into eternal torture and pain.
<christy> who're we to tell god what he can get off on?! :P

<Caltak> Let's all take wagers on the last digit of pi. Not that it has anything to do with Hubris. Or does it? Perhaps there was a little known hero in Wichita, Kansas known as Obscure Fact Man who indeed knew the last digit of pi, but was killed in the nuclear blast-- or at the very least was wounded and knocked his head on a wall, stone, or other suitably hard object and forgot.
<Caltak> Thought that's not likely.
<Caltak> But nothing ever is, until it happens a whole bunch of times.
<Baliadoc> right...
<Caltak> left.
<Alcar> the last digit is 8. but sideways :p

<[francesca]> Alcar Hah! I tried taking deductions for donations! And then I found out that I have to donate a certain percentage of my total income before I can take a deduction! I'd still donate, but that was NOT a welcome discovery.
<[francesca]> Alcar They don't feed you enough at communion to make a meal of it
<Alcar> LOL fran. That IS sad.
<Alcar> Yeah, but the soup kitchens should :)
<[francesca]> Alcar Well it's not like I've tried that... I'm just making an observation. Jeez.
* [francesca] turns red with embarassment.
<Alcar> LOL fran. That IS sad. <-- was about the donations :P
<[francesca]> Alcar OH!
* [francesca] turns new shades of red

<Chaos`^> brb, have to cleam ny keyboard it's sticking keys
<Caltak> ewww Chaos, TMI! j/k :P
<Chaos`^> eeeeeeeeee3e3rsder54sderwsderddfgedeewewewewewewewedsdfgtyhuiop[oiuytzxcvbnm,./

<jbc> /server -m mclean.va.us.undernet.org 6667
<jbc> and /join #scripture for an hour (especially during busy time)
<jbc> sad, innit alc?
* Alcar is afraid.
<jbc> I used to troll there ;)
<jbc> in fact, it was your IRC quotes page, alc, that made me investigate this place
<Alcar> lol. How'd it do that?
<jbc> it mentioned this place a few times, in the midst of some truly mind-numbing quotes
<jbc> it just had to be cool :)

<jjbc> okay, I want to be a catholic! >strain< ... Do I believe it all yet? mm, not quite. Try some more... >nnnnggghhh!< ... there! .. NOW it's true!
<Alcar> jbc is giving birth?
<morsheh> is it true jbc?
<[francesca]> jjbc I waited until I was ready to make the decision - I always knew that being agnostic was temporary. I can't tell you how I knew, but I just knew. I was taking a break before I took a fresh start. So it was only an intellectual decision in that I decided to follow my intuition.
<jjbc> Alcar: I was wondering about the process of conversion
<jjbc> no, morsheh. I was illustrating.

<Sewak> jjbc, who invented this philosophy?
<jjbc> um, I'd always assumed everyone invented it for themselves.
<jjbc> so surely, in the name of all things purple, you can't change your intellectual views while your intuition stays fixed
<jjbc> without knowing you're a liar
<jjbc> okay, this has *always* been one of my most basic underlying assumptions
<jjbc> I never had to spell it out before, as I always assumed everyone held it as well
<jjbc> and I'm vastly disturbed to learn that it's an optional feature
<jjbc> how on earth do people think?

<WackyFunster> Kristin_Hartnett: And maybe try some alpha hydroxy type stuff on your face, for better skin tone
<aslhk> does that stuff work?
<Nevaeh> It didn't for me.
<Nevaeh> It made my skin oily.
<aslhk> I don't have skin on my face
<Nevaeh> Then put it on your ass. o.o
<WackyFunster> It exfoliates!
* Alcar watches OPEC kidnap Neveah as a resource for oil....

<leylaa> i think it is a good topic
<leylaa> what's wrong with it
<WackyFunster> leylaa: Other than being immature, obnoxious flame-bait, you mean?
<leylaa> better than other hate inducing stuff ive seen
<Alcar[away]> Isn't religion about inducing hate though? *looks confused*

<Kristin_Hartnett> I'm going to name my children afro names.
<Kristin_Hartnett> Like Shaquandramaria.
<RedPermanentMarker> Thats not a name, that a direct result of constipation.

<perion> Ya know - I've never met an enemy that I didn't get to like when we actually set down and did some caffeine
<Alcar> That's just because you gave them arenic for sugar though!

<barking_frog> It's necessary to say things that're necessary to say!
<perion> Ask a question that plows to the depths and leaves no bystanders
<virgio> perion: Do you like milk?
<perion> yep
<virgio> Done deal.
* perion was hoping fer some ass-kicker
* virgio obligingly kicks your ass.

<Tandaco> has anything passed the Turing Test yet?
<Alcar> Smoe humans.
<Alcar> but it might have been a fluke
<Alcar> Actually, some computers have passed some limited ones.
<Alcar> Limited meaning about one subject (say, winemaking) and no trying to ask tricky questions, whatever that is
<barking_frog> Alcar: uh-huh
<barking_frog> Alcar: you don't understand about tricky questions :-P
<barking_frog> Alcar: uh-huh
<Alcar> I guess it would be ones that intentioally try and prove the person you're "talking" to is a computer
<barking_frog> Alcar: you mean, like, type your question in binary and see if it still understands you?
<Alcar> Q: "So, wine goes good with cheese, but does it go good with pie?" A: "3.14159265358979323846 does not go good with wine." "Hah, got you!"

<aslhk> It is a patent truth that repetition of words or phrases causes loss in efficacy. Was the printing press our undoing?
<aslhk> Look at the Internet. Yes, there are sites which cleverly arrange words into new and interesting patterns, but are there not many more sites commonly considered useless, inane, or inaccurate!?
<aslhk> What about the "All your base are belong to us" craze?
* Alcar[afk] wants to know what is being undone, tho :)
<aslhk> Alcar: Our culture! Our ability to communicate effectively! Our ability to convey meaning through words!
<aslhk> All of these things are slowly being undermined by the massive increase in printed words!
<Alcar> Hmm. Well, culture is the sum of, well, everything if you get right down to it. So I don't see how we can lose it.
<aslhk> Alcar: hah! Fine! But, because of the very loss of meaning I have spoken of, there are many who would not have contested the sentence, but merely nodded their heads blankly!

<aslhk> that would be a neat theme park
<aslhk> it takes place in a house where you basically get whatever you want
<aslhk> with some minor setbacks, like, you know, losing your soul and ending up as a scary-looking monstrousity in a weird lake
<Alcar> Oh. The Thief of Always?
<aslhk> he did another one?
<Alcar> Ah,. Yeah, more recent one. Not sure if it's out yet, but it's the one disney got a theme park for
<Alcar> Disney doesn't need one for places that suck up souls. That would sort of embody disney :p
<aslhk> I know!
<aslhk> but I figured they'd do a good job
<aslhk> having a unique understanding of that sort of thing!

<Biophilo> Nietzsche said that we don't really read a sentence, we just "grasp some words and conjecture the meaning".
<Alcar> Biophilo - Err, then why did he write that? :)
<Biophilo> Hey, this is Nietzsche, how could I ever know ?

<Alcar> It should be funny, tho, since the novels get darker as it goes on .. dunno how they'll make the 3rd a kids movie.
<aslhk> the fourth is even darker
<|337C4Bb4g3> dark?
<|337C4Bb4g3> heh
* |337C4Bb4g3 hasn't read any of them :/
<aslhk> they have relatively mature themes for children's books
<aslhk> people die and the like

* |337C4Bb4g3 need to learn to get inspired on demand ;b

<|337C4Bb4g3> I should write a parable for "Good things don't come to those who wait"
<Alcar> "Jeff was a nice kid in school and always finished last at events. But he knew that nice guys finish last and that meant he was a nice person. One day Jeff didn't finish last in an assignment so he realised he wasn't nice and beat the crap out of the kid who finished last because all his illusions about himself had been destroyed."
<Alcar> Wait, I know.. "Anne was waiting for good things to happen to her, because she'd been told that patience is a virtue. So we waited, and waited, but even though she filled out the forms and was winner, she never got her Sweepstakes prizre and eventually went broke because she spent all her allowance on stamps."

<Alcar> "Why Jane Divorced Bob, A True Story: Jane spent her life working at menial jobs to save money for Bob's business instead of getting an education and making something of herself. But Bob no longer cared about it. When Jane realised that, she seperated from Bob but came back because she needed to be able to justify her lack of successs in life."

<|337C4Bb4g3> No, I want parables that inspire people to STOP sucking
<Alcar> Oh.
<Alcar> "Jimmy loved lollipops. He loved them so much he sucked and sucked and one day he sucked on one so hard he swallowed the entire thing and choked and died. The moral of this story: If you suck, know when to stop sucking."

<WackyFunster> I call them 'religious atheists'
<WackyFunster> And they generally are almost identical to Christian/Muslum fundies in terms of the reasoning they use, maturity level, etc.
<WackyFunster> Not to mention the annoying attempts at evangelism
<Alcar> Standing on a street corner with a sign : "Repent and be saved! Free non propaganda on how to free your mind from the tyranny of religion!"
<Alcar> Then further down the road: "More freedom, become a scientologist!"
<WackyFunster> Then there's the guy with the sign that says, "Give me slack, or give me food (or kill me)."
<WackyFunster> Watch out for that guy.
<Alcar> Actually, I'd like to see atheists on street corners seriously .. would be a fun change. "The End Of The World Is Nigh ... Because We're Polluting It, You Morons."

<aslhk> I think someone should write a book entitled, "What God Doesn't Want You To Know"
<aslhk> I don't know what would be in it, though
<WackyFunster> it should be: 475 things that god doesn't want you to know
<WackyFunster> or somesuch
<aslhk> maybe it would be about the Duckbill Platypus
<Alcar> The names of all the other omnipotent and all powerful gods throughout history? :)

<aslhk> how about, "Embarrassing Creations: 475 Things God Doesn't Want You To Know About"
<Alcar> 1) humans. 2) Neaderthals 3) Lucy 4) Charles Schultz
<aslhk> how about, "Embarrassing Creations: 475 Things God Doesn't Want You To Know About"
<Alcar> Actaully, that could work as a book ... the stuff they've found from the first mass extinction is suppossed to be really, really weird ....... "Things that never made it, and why - explaining why god murdered the dinosaurs"
<Alcar> Sort of like a kids creationist evolution book
<Regulis7> perhaps he planned on man having autos one day and knew they would manufacture gas from their decayed piles of shit and bodies?

* lauretta has joined #enlightenment_warez
<lauretta> !list
<Alcar> !no
<Alcar> !doesthislooklikeafreakingwarezchannel?
<lauretta> !list
* lauretta has left #enlightenment_warez

* Alcar just has this horrible mental image of a 12 step zen guide for self improvement.
* Alcar watches the world implode.
<Alcar> 1. "There is no self, nor is their extinction of it. 2. "there is no help, nor is there anything to be helped." 3. "There is no self help." Repeat 4 times and call yourself in the morning. If you stil think you have a self, lather, rinse and repeat.

<Chaos`^> They are really wierd
<Chaos`^> I'm looking at this cd of theirs, they have one song titled 'hooker with a penis'
<Alcar> Do the lyrics contain the word "Give that back, I'm not through with it yet?" :P
<Chaos`^> it has nothing to do with a hooker or a penis =p
<Alcar> So it's sort of like all car ads on tv that have nothing to do with cars. Actually, that applies to almost all commercials...

<LadyIslay> I've decided not to put up a Christmas Tree
<Chaos`^> how come?
<LadyIslay> Takes up too much space. Too much of a pain to get it out of storage.
<LadyIslay> and... it is hard to get real trees... when you don't have a car
<Chaos`^> that's really really really sad
<LadyIslay> also
<LadyIslay> it is hard to get rid of them when you live in the city
<LadyIslay> andcan't burn things
<Alcar> keep it up all year round!
<Alcar> By spring it can be a cactus and by late summer it can be a conversation piece of modern art.

<Jeramias> So you're not dead, eh? :)
<Alcar> Actually, I am. I've just decided to haunt you all between the hours of 2 and 4 every Wednesday.
<Jeramias> Thank god you'll be gone in two minutes
<Jeramias> Because if you're really haunting me, then you're using Mountain time, not pacific.

<Kattelyn> different, I don't think I've ever heard that outlook before
<jbc> what outlook would that be?
<Kattelyn> <Relvm> I think that the bible ment this place as to being hell considering that at the time i think their was a physical place called hell in israel or some place and that at that time the world might look like hell considering many ppl were being tourchered killed and staked and burned
<Kattelyn> <Relvm> it is as iff all of them teach the same thing.Only some religions see the teachings as a way to becoming god like and or to break free from the chain of reincarnation to this material world
<loving^boy^from^shandi> !~!~!~! Hello everyone there !~!~!~!
<jbc> you're right, that's weird

* [Laura] wants to meet some wise person, kill them, and declare to the judge that "She wanted me to kill her! She was a a buddha! We have to kill them!"
<[Laura]> Then go at the judge :)

<virgio> Randomness is an illusion created lottery companies.
<WackyFunster> yeah
<WackyFunster> all events in life happen with a 50/50 probability!

<stare_at_some_tsql> does anyone know what a jewish church is called so i can look them up?
<barking_frog> synagogue?
<stare_at_some_tsql> synagogue thats what i was looking for
<Tandaco> stare_at_some_tsql: you're not on some Nazi trip are you?
<stare_at_some_tsql> no
<stare_at_some_tsql> i need an accountant and i need him to be jewish
<stare_at_some_tsql> for tax purposes
* Alcar[away] blinks
<Alcar[away]> that's ... new.
* barking_frog blinks, too
* Alcar[away] wonders if hitler ever heard of that ... .guess not.
<stare_at_some_tsql> I heard that Jewish accountants r the best
<stare_at_some_tsql> and i need the best
<barking_frog> Alcar[away]: where does one begin to address a statement like that?
<Alcar[away]> no idea :)

<GrumpyOldBastard> a tornado, rampant in destruction as it may be, is not good nor evil. it just is.
<Alcar> GrumpyOldBastard - if it wrecks my home it's either a) evil or b) an act of God. If b, it proves god must be evil .. or I did a horribe decorating job that called down divine retribution

<Relvm> life is just a playground to learn not a place to hide thinking that everything is wrong and evil
<virgio> We should destroy the only couch that *wasn't* destroyed by the tornado while we are raging against its evil.
<GrumpyOldBastard> calling it evil doesnt do much... may feed the persecution complex and make you feel slightly better for a time, but just try and stop one. it's nature, can't defeat it
<virgio> GrumpyOldBastard: Nope. Can't defeat evil all the time. You're right.
<virgio> Relvm: it's not hiding. As I just pointed out, there's always a lesson to be learned.
<Alcar> virgio - that the world hates you? :)
<virgio> Alcar: <grins> That's certainly more entertaining than "shit happens".

<GrumpyOldBastard> why do some chicks feel the need to play with your emotions and just generally mindfuck you?
<Relvm> makes them feel smarter
<Relvm> that and they know how gulable us males are
<virgio> GrumpyOldBastard: It's about power.
<virgio> A lot of guys are out for sex. Women control sex. They use that control in less-than-moral ways at times.

<LadyIslay> how many yards in a mile?
<LadyIslay> hrm
* LadyIslay goes to the internet to look it up
<Alcar> hmm, used to know. I forget.
<LadyIslay> if you ever need to know how many meters are in a km, you can ask me
<aslhk> five thousand something
<Warner> im getting 12,000 ft per mile hmm
<Warner> oh wait thats a mil

* Mukuru has this image of an angst poem just being every curse word, racial slur etc all shoved together into a few lines....
<|337C4Bb4g3> maybe mine shouldn't really be classified as 'angst'
<|337C4Bb4g3> it is more the 'this world is crap, my life is so hard, wah wah wah' sort of thing
<|337C4Bb4g3> i dunno what that's called
<Mukuru> Hmm, pseudo angst?
<Mukuru> pre post modern angst?
<|337C4Bb4g3> post-post-modern

<little`whip> i dont belive in god...
<Alcar> Oh.
<Alcar> Which one?
<little`whip> any
<Alcar> Do you believe in chanserv?
<little`whip> if there is any where is more than one..
<little`whip> but i dont belive theres one
<Alcar> little`whip - but chanserv exists.
* ChanServ sets mode: +o Alcar
<Alcar> See?
<Alcar> how can you deny the evidence of your senses?
<little`whip> Alcar i didnt say chanserv didnt exist.
<Alcar> But chanserv is a god, and you just said you didn't believe in god.
* Alcar is confused now
<little`whip> chanserv is Not a god.Alcar> little`whip - Liar!
<Alcar> http://www.geocities.com/chanservian/chan_index.html
<Alcar> See? Proof
<little`whip> thats no proff.. a moronr wrote a stupid thing saying a stupid thing dosnt make it proof of anything
<BoyInMid`Air> did you just call someone a moronr?
<little`whip> moron.
<Alcar> little`whip - Just because you can't understand it's complexities doesn't invalidate it at all.
<Alcar> Sorry.
* Alcar finds it interesting that all these people who say there is no god refuse to accept proof when it's placed before them. I guess people just like to wallow in ignorance and decide that if a god doesn't fit their idea of deity, none can exist.

<Alcar> IMO, all beliefs are local *shrugs* To say we know what is Real and/or True is just hubris, arrogance, or stupidity. We can't *know* - we can just guess. And to take our guesses as ultimate truth strikes me as absurd, if not a little sad.
<barking_frog> that's the difference between agnosticism and militant agnosticism
<barking_frog> agnostics don't know the answer
<barking_frog> militant agnostics don't know the answer, and neither do you
<Alcar> Well, someone else might. *shrugs* I figure any belief could be right, or they could all be right, or all be wrong ... I've just stopped thinking it really matters. What happens will be what happens.
<barking_frog> I basically believe what Alcar said, but I choose to call it atheism
* barking_frog chuckles
<\\`arner> I figure they're all wrong. people can't describe how to get downtown accurately enough to keep me from getting lost and they think they can descibe god and the after life to me with out getting something wrong?

<\\`arner> Our god is new and improved :)
<Alcar> \\`arner - God Light - Sin Free* andthe wafers taste the same as regular wafers! * Sin Free is defined as 0.5grams of sin or less per serving.
<Alcar> Hm, actually God Lite seems to be very popular. "You can read your holy books and only obey the commands you like! This means you have more time to work out at the gym!"
<aslhk> Alcar: lol! Is that the selling point?
<Alcar> of course. The body is the temple of the soul! And you can burn more caleries if you're not reading!
<aslhk> that makes sense to me!
<aslhk> Where can I sign up?
<Alcar> That's the beauty of it: everyone already has *cue scary music*

<Jeramias> I asked one of my friends if she wanted to go to a movie with us after school, and she later told me that she thought that I was kidding when I asked her :)
<aslhk> that is sad +P
<Jeramias> Then she informed me that she had a boyfriend and I said "So do I!" and she only laughed at me again :)
<Jeramias> "You are funny."
<Jeramias> "I'm not trying to be funny! You insult me!"

<SaMnMaX> The are 2 doors, one always lies, one always tells the truth, behind one of them is freedom, behind the other is certain death, you may ask them one question each
<Alcar> What are the doors made out of?
<SaMnMaX> ok,were not getting practical now
* Alcar would bring in dynamite. "Are you the door of truth, because if I go through you and die, I blow up and you become pieces so think fast."
<SaMnMaX> ok, the door shrugs, and dont care
<SaMnMaX> it's made form soemthing indestructable
<SaMnMaX> and your dynamite is imaginary
<Alcar> So is truth.
<SaMnMaX> i spose
<SaMnMaX> but thats an entirely different issue
* Alcar grins. "I'd ask if death is freedom."
<SaMnMaX> alcar
<SaMnMaX> do you know what prozac is?

<Temera> Be good, go to heaven.. be bad, get reincarnated. There's my definition of hell :P
<Alcar> lol. WHich is hell tho? :)

<Cal> I think bad people should go to heaven :P
<Cal> cause to them it would be hell

* Alcar thinks it's an evil plot. conspiracies dont' really exist Roswell was a weather balloon. Kennedy was shot once. They're all trying to make us distrust the govnerment and it's working. Then, finally, when chaos and anarchy have reigned the Old Ones will awaken and kill us all.
<Alcar> It's the only logical way to look at it.

<Tandaco> the idea of an omnipotent invisible being who created everything there is is FAR more insane than beings from other planets
<Alcar> Tandaco - Why? The aliens had to be created too :p

<ArthurQ> the one where he found maggots in her pussy was hilarious
<ArthurQ> "hehehe somthing tickles!"
<ArthurQ> hahah
<ArthurQ> i almost threw up
<ArthurQ> but i couldnt stop laughing
<Keith`> then it would be a no q
* ArthurQ nods
<ArthurQ> i figured as much
<Keith`> I'm sorry but your stuck with being single for the rest of your life

<|337C4Bb4g3> I may be moving in January :/
<|337C4Bb4g3> Assuming I cannot find some ways to occupy myself here b
<Alcar> serial killer.
<aslhk> we could pull that off
<Alcar> not only do you get to be occupied, you can move too!

<|337C4Bb4g3> I know that you think that being stupid qualifies as trolling, but I can assure you that that is not the case, and that you have not once fooled any of us with your ignorant posturing from atop the gazebo of denial.
<jbc> and leet, personal attacks are not appreciated.
<|337C4Bb4g3> jbc: It was not intended as a personal attack, merely a statement of fact, and I know that you know that I am not incorrect in my assertion, despite any protestations you may make to the contrary.

<|337C4Bb4g3> [francesca]: I'm not picking on anyone =) barking_frog is an atheist (or was last I heard), and I don't hear him making ludicrous and irrational assertions =)
<[francesca]> |337C4Bb4g3 Now did I call you out specifically? No. Which makes me think you WERE guilty since you responded so defensively. ;-)
<barking_frog> |337C4Bb4g3: what the Hell are you trying to imply by that?!?
<|337C4Bb4g3> barking_frog: I have you on /ignore
<|337C4Bb4g3> j/k ;)
<barking_frog> |337C4Bb4g3: oh yeah? Well I have you on /ignore, too... and have, for weeks :-P

<sonriendo> ummmmm wonna gues what the phd field is ???
<aslhk> puhsychology!
<sonriendo> lol yeppers!!
<sonriendo> the crazy working with the crazy
<sonriendo> they always say do what you do best so i did

<AndorXx> i think, therefore i am
<WackyFunster> That is the STUPIDEST fucking argument ever (no offense)
<AndorXx> how so?
<AndorXx> how can you deny it?
<WackyFunster> It is like the epitome of non-sequitur
<AndorXx> you gonna try arguing that you AREN'T?
<WackyFunster> AndorXx: Of course not, but my existence is not predicated upon my thinking
<WackyFunster> That is ludicrous and irrational
<WackyFunster> Not to mention utterly illogical
<Alcar> WackyFunster - Then that's proof it's philosophy!

<Jehu> and i am really 'into' mental masturbation
<Alcar> Jehu - what else is thinking? :)

<Jehu> uh huh... and what is hiphop?
<Jehu> hip to the hoppity
<AndorXx> hip hop is where inner city poetry went mainstream
<Jehu> right on andorxx
<AndorXx> to make a long story short

<Alcar> then again, a benevolent dictatorship migjht just be the best kind of government possible :p
<Alcar> problem is making it benevolent.
<Primordian> To me, it was Evil. But then, I admittedly consider any dictatorship to be evil. Regardless of how often it is called "benevolent".
<Primordian> I actually heard propoganda for Saddam call his rule "benevolent" (hehs)
* Alcar has heard the same for Bush.
* Alcar grins evilly
<Primordian> yep -- in the USA it's "compassionate" not "benevolent"

<Alcar> Primordian - regarding americans going like lambs to a slaughter, I think it's a cultural issue. Simply that americans no longer believe voting matters or makes a difference. I mean, the party in power seldom ever really changes thing or is, in reality, much different from the other party.
<[francesca]> Alcar I think you may be right.
<ClockworkAngel> Have to agree with that. I've never voted for a good candidate.
<Jehu> the left and right only differ when absolutely necessary.... so that they seem to be different
<ClockworkAngel> I've voted for the one I thought was least likely to fuck up
<ClockworkAngel> and voted for one for the sole purpose of NOT voting for the one I hated
<[francesca]> It always boils down to the lesser of two or more evils. I always end up voting against the one I dislike the most.

<barking_frog> [francesca] needs beauty sleep like I need lessons in etiquette
<[francesca]> I don't appreciate the insult, barking_frog
<barking_frog> [francesca]: if you figured out that that was an insult, then I make it up by complimenting you on your intelligence ;-)
* barking_frog chuckles

* jbc Quit (Quit: Read error: Connection reset by ph33r)

<newstra> In order to suffer one must have great amounts of knowledge and understanding and wisdom, such is why animals don't suffer which is why it's ok to eat them
<newstra> pain doesn't cause suffering unless you want to stop the pain
<newstra> otherwise it is just an experience

<newstra> well i mean if the function of hell is to cause suffering, then suffering is an angent of satan, therefore to cause suffering is to work for satan. To kill animals for food is to cause suffering, therefore to kill animals for food is to be an agent of satan.
<sonriendo> they dont suffer when we kill them it is safe and humane
<newstra> and well i don't want to insult jesus, i read the gospels and all and he's a cool dude, but based on that argument, he shouldn't have been eating the fish

<|337C4Bb4g3> You know how stupid the average person is?
<Mukuru> enough that being called smarter than average isn't a compliment? :p
<337C4Bb4g3> Well, half of them are even stupider!
<|337C4Bb4g3> Now, babies will, under the wrong circumstances, grow up to BE people
<|337C4Bb4g3> So there is a 50% chance that any baby will grow up to be stupider than average
<|337C4Bb4g3> Is that a risk that we can allow ourselves to take?!
<|337C4Bb4g3> I think not... I think not ;P)
* Mukuru chuckles. Reminds me of the saying that when you marry a stupid person you're playing russian roulette with the intelligence of your children.
<|337C4Bb4g3> In a way, you are!
<|337C4Bb4g3> Of course, if you marry a stupid person, you deserve stupid kids!
* Mukuru has yet to see how eating them will help us tho. Stupid people are necessary, to run government and stuff.
<|337C4Bb4g3> Ah, they will be replaced by clones
<|337C4Bb4g3> We will make an army of clones, raised in virtual realities so that they are all exactly identical
<|337C4Bb4g3> And not-stupid
<|337C4Bb4g3> Well, no stupider than they need to be!
<|337C4Bb4g3> Unfortunately, we haven't found a way to rear them to be stupid enough to handle the presidency

<Borian_> alcar: read the bible.. it explains it.
<Alcar> Borian - Not to me, it doesn't. Mostly because unless I learn the original languages, read the original versions, and understand the social/cultural and historical issues of the times it was written in I won't learn anything save how to impose my own beliefs on very biased political translations.
<Borian_> alcar: but not learning the language, but refusing to believe anything becuase you don't understand the language is self inflected ingornace.

<SilverH|Zzzz> the religious debates here are like sex
<SilverH|Zzzz> they get hotter and hotter
<SilverH|Zzzz> then someone gives a big splurt
<SilverH|Zzzz> and its over, and you are hungry

* Nevaeh Quit (Quit: Dalnet in a lot of ways is similar to organized religions: unreliable, full of perverts, and dictated by disgruntled gods.)

<Borian_> life is a game.. if you lose, you win... think sun tsu or someone said it.
* Alcar prefers to cheat
<WackyFunster> Alcar: I agree ;)
<WackyFunster> Life is too short to play by the rules ;b
* Alcar nods. I'll have to say that at my trial :p
<WackyFunster> Especially when those rules are generally just methods of social control implemented by the evolution of a society

<dartmouth> americans don't celebrate christ.
<dartmouth> they celebrate macy's.
<dartmouth> and the can can dancers with their naked legs up in the air.

<Quimera> TREKKIES SUCK, they need a life
<barking_frog> Quimera: "suck" is an oral sex refrence, which means it's almost a profanity, and profanity isn't allowed in the channel except by ops and regulars, and people with a damn good reason. First warning
<Quimera> and u all, do u guys have a life????
<barking_frog> Quimera: thinking too hard for a comeback, that's a kickable offense!
* Quimera was kicked by barking_frog (barking_frog)
* Quimera has joined #religion
<barking_frog> Quimera: lame comeback, bannable offense!
* barking_frog sets mode: +b *!*@200.67.158.*
* Quimera was kicked by barking_frog (barking_frog)

<Alcar> Religion: The Pyramid Scheme. Whoever saves souls goes up in ranks, but eventually there is no one for the minions to save so they have to breed a lot to get more souls and increase themselves in rank, but the upper fellows get a cut of each soul saved so the process continues...
* Alcar doubts that already exists, but I guess if you had believer = saved, semi-bveliever = next then infidel and heretic and atheist as "ranks" you could make some weird arguement for it. I'm not sure how you'd prove it tho, because christianity has that jesus salvation clause.
* Alcar sighs. Yet another doctoral thesis ruined by a forgiving deity.

<o____o> Religion RPG?
<ModernSatanist> no debates going on here or anything eh?
<o____o> Who wants to play Jesus? I'll play God.
<Jestar> nah, can't powerplay
<Alcar> buddhism is better. Because if you kill buddha you not only get enlightened but lots of experience points!
<o____o> No way! I didn't drown! I cast walk-on-water. Didn't you see me? I did! I did! glub glub
* Jestar summons Allah
<Jestar> I would like to cast Jihad
* Jestar rolls the dice
* barking_frog counters with Crusade
<Alcar> Bush becomes president of the US.
<Alcar> Allah: "You rolled too high."
* Jestar slaps down his Get Out of Jail free card
<Nevaeh> I see your crusade and raise you a small pox plague! (baptists) Kill without the killing, can't be too obvious in our glory for god.
<o____o> Don't cast your stupid walk-on-water. I need the experience points. Let me cast part-the-sea.

* barking_frog thinks we're on to something here, and should rough-draft rules and a deck of cards :-/
<o____o> I bet you it would sell
<Jestar> dice, cards, and a warhammer like setup for the campaigns
<Jestar> so I can paint my Force Armour Jesus

<o____o> Why is prostitution wrong, but marrying for money right?
<Nevaeh> heh, but... buying dinner for someone and anticipating sex.. is modern dating.

* ClockworkAngel thinks there is absolute truth, but thinks that it is categorically unknowable.
* mixedextremes doesn't believe in truth
<mixedextremes> i define truth as "a belief that will not be changed"
<mixedextremes> i get that idea from Nietzsche
<ClockworkAngel> I define it as "the way the universe really is" (absolute truth)
<ClockworkAngel> of course, then you get "the way the universe is commonly agreed upon to be" (societal truth)
<mixedextremes> the universe changes, so it has no permenant way it is, nothing about it is eternal or absolute

<aslhk> ah, I see! I rather like it! Today I bought my brother a Jesus action figure!
<aslhk> he will be very excited about it, I am sure!
<Baliadoc> a Jesus action figure? sweet!
<aslhk> *laugh* I thought so!
<aslhk> the really funny thing about it is that it has wheels at the bottom!
<aslhk> so it can "glide"
<aslhk> I was truly amazed by it
<Baliadoc> wow... that's impressive.
<Baliadoc> Jesus, with Holy Gliding Action!
<aslhk> the packaging says something along those lines!
<aslhk> it says, "Jesus Action Figure" at the top, with Jesus in big bold letters, and down at the lower right there's like this yellow oval thingie which says "With poseable arms & gliding action!"
<Baliadoc> all he needs is squeezable legs that let his hands move for instant blessing movements!
<aslhk> then there's "Warning: Choking hazard. Small Parts. Not suitable for children under 3 years."
<aslhk> "Made in China"!
<Baliadoc> ... just as in the Bible... *much awe*

<[> Violent video games are evil! What are we teaching our children!?
<Caltak> To take out their violent tendencies on computer-generated bad guys instead of real people? ;)
<[> Exactly!
<[> What kind of world are we pushing for here!?
<Caltak> you have a point, theres too much overpopulation as it is.
<Jeramias> One where we can't blungeon our fellow man?!
<[> Already violaotors of laws involving fights--even fights without weapons!!--are receiving harsher sentences and more convinctions!
<Caltak> I remember the good old days when if you wanted to hear the satisfying squish of a crowbar smashing through someone's head, you grabed one from the tool shed and went to your neighbor's house! :P
<[> Caltak: Exactly! And now if you want to use a crowbar for anything but stealing cars, you need a permit or some shit! What's up with that!?
<[> Tyranny! It's fascism, I tell you! The government is trying to control every aspect of our lives!

<Caltak> *sigh* why oh why do I spell it right 4 or 5 times then typo it once? :P
* Caltak needs to think while typing rather than letting my hands try to keep up with my brain.

* Sparkie could have a script that generates personel ads .....
<Reykemias> that would be moderately pointless.
<Sparkie> nothing amusing is pointless :p
<aslhk> Reykemias: I bet there're significant numbers of people who would pay 0 extra in their personals ad to have it automatically generated for them!
<Alcar> SWM seeking SWF, NS, NP, NK (I have no idea if No Kids exists in them, but it should..) I like swimming, riding [all women like horses], romantic movies and long walks on the beach. I am honest and caring and outgoing. If you're between 14 and 75 leave a message at box#666
<Alcar> Then I'd leave a message: "Maybe if you'd really cared about your last wife and not spent all your time on sports you'd still be married!" or something.
<Chaos`^> lol Alcar, that's a cliche =p
<Alcar> which is? :)
<Chaos`^> all guys like long walks on the beach romantic movies and riding, but they really don't =p
<Alcar> of course. But it's in almost all personal ads in some form or another. Except the riding bit .. but it should be in there :) Mostly because it can be taken as a double entendre :p

* Alcar remembers ads in comic books for them....
<Caltak> ads for what?
<Alcar> spinning tops that fought on a plastic board
<Caltak> Alcar: Um, we have Beyblades tops at the store I work at, so yes. :p
<Alcar> is that basically what they are?
<Caltak> You can put em together with different parts then you spin them in this plastic arena thingy
* Alcar can recall the comic book ads. The bad guys wanted to cut the wires at the centre of the earth to destroy gravity and the good tops had to stop them.
* Alcar has no idea WHY I recall those ads.
<Keith`> thats creepy alcar
<Alcar> Very.
<Keith`> you should check your self into a mental ward
<Alcar> They they came back is worse. I mean, transformers were cool. These things are just stupid.
<Chaos`^> Alcar found his new illness
<Alcar> keith - but then how would I stop them from cutting off our gravity?!
* Alcar spins off into a corner of the channel
<Caltak> Did you know they have an Electronic Launcher now? I mean wtf
<Keith`> damn man..
<Keith`> kids not even going to be able to twist off a beer cap when he hits drinking age with the new ones..
<Keith`> hmm.. could be a bonus

<Caltak> Rainbow Brite! Dont forget Rainbow Brite!!!
<Caltak> er.... *quiets down* ¬_¬
* Keith` shudders
<aslhk> ooh, I loved Rainbow Brite!
<Keith`> thanks caltak, i had mentaly blocked that one out!

<Alcar> if a guy told you (for guys) that a woman was "built like a brick shithouse" would you say he was complimenting her?
<barking_frog> Alcar: yeah, that's a compliment... but it doesn't seem like it should be one
<barking_frog> Alcar: I assure you that it's a compliment :-)
<barking_frog> Alcar: what I don't understand is HOW it's a compliment ;-)
<Alcar> then how is it a compliment?!
* barking_frog shrugs :-)
<barking_frog> I've been half-thinking about it, and I think I see the reasoning
<barking_frog> it is, truly, some exceptionally redneck reasoning, but I think I see it
<barking_frog> a shithouse is obviously an outhose
<barking_frog> now, there's no such thing as a brick outhouse... they're made of wood and they're always made cheap
<barking_frog> so I think the implication is just that you're dealing with something that's extraordinarily "well-built"
<barking_frog> Alcar: it's like that line in They Live... "I'm here to kick ass and chew bubble gum. And I'm all out of bubble gum." Great line... but nobody can explain why. Probably not even the person who wrote it

<barking_frog> d5000: I don't think I was paying attention during that
<d5000> You were nodding your little froggy head off
<barking_frog> d5000: that's usually a signal that I'm not paying attention ;-)

<|337C4Bb4g3> What is it that leads people to feel that everyone should believe the same things they do
<Alcar> Because I'm right.
<|337C4Bb4g3> (some people)
<SotapannaSamadhi> 337..., because they do not believe there could be more then one truth
<|337C4Bb4g3> Do you feel that he was right to try to impose his beliefs on another person?
<Alcar> |337C4Bb4g3 - Of course it it! now shut up! :p
<passingthru> people tend to absolutize their own perspective
<Alcar> it is, even.
<passingthru> they take their symbols for truth
* Alcar is imposing typoes on others...

<barking_frog> I know that you're all wrong, but that neither I nor any of you would benefit from me revealing Ultimate Truth to you :-P
<barking_frog> so I just shut up and chuckle a lot ;-)
* barking_frog chuckles

<[francesca]> I'll say it again: You don't see atheists out there murdering people - all the serial killers were religious people.
<Alcar> [francesca] - Give it time :) We'll eventually see some wacko murdering people because god didn;'t tell not to :P
<Alcar> or something weird like that.
<[francesca]> Alcar Now THAT'S funny :-)
<Alcar> "I was killing those Mormons to prove there is no aferlife!"
* Alcar runs off to blow up churches to free men's mind from enslavement :P

<CorbinLee> Are we allowed to quote the Bible in here? Because I am a Bible-quoting atheist :)
* Alcar would like to meet an atheist-quoting christian...."[Fundamentalists] never wonder why, if herpes is sent by “god” to scourge “adulterers,” whooping cough and measles weren’t purposely created to lambaste children." (Fred Woodworth) And THIS is PROOF of how atheism makes light of the SINS of MAN!

* CorbinLee Quit (Quit: "Wandering in a vast forest at night, I have only a faint light to guide me. A stranger appears and says to me: 'My friend, you should blow out your candle in order to find your way more clearly.' This stranger is a theologian." --Denis Dideot)
<Alcar> And I said: "But only the light will guide me" and the stranger said "But how can a blind man see it?" And Lo! I was enlightened!

<Silvran> (( too many onions in this damn salad, I'm gonna kill whoever made it ))
<Silvran> (( but that would be suicide :P ))

<RedPermanentMarker> hey alcar
<RedPermanentMarker> We were just discussing sex with relatives and morality.
<Alcar> Well, people are always saying morals are relative so having sex with them shouldn't be a problem :p
<RedPermanentMarker> *giggles* You suck! :P

<Chaos`^> 666+1337 = 2003
<Chaos`^> the anti christ is a hacker!

<barking_frog> Alcar: I love Heart of Darkness :-)
<Alcar> Same :)
<barking_frog> Alcar: it's one of my favorite feel-good novels

<Warner> Anyone ever read 'The Case Against God' By George H Smith?
<Warner> Smith drives me nuts with his insistance that you have to either belive in god or not belive in him
* Alcar believes I could believe!
<Allegro> hmm well...either you do...or do not...no?
<Warner> I'm reading it now (ebook) and I find my self screaming at him
<Alcar> Allegro - I've found that an iffy question since no two people seem to have the same idea of what God is.
<Warner> If you ask me if God exists my responce is "I don't know but one can always hope"
<Allegro> well yes...the definition of GOd has to be determined and agreed upon upfront
<Alcar> It's like: Do you believe in Smarties? Hah! I believe in Red ones too! What do you mean, you believe in blue ones! Heretic!

<Allegro> once you define God...then it should be rather easy to determine whether you believe in God or not...if you dont know...then there is probably not a belief in what you dont know...then again there are many Catholics... ;)
<Warner> Allegro if a magician puts a coin in one hand then offers you both hands and asks you which one you belive the coin is in how many times does he have to fool you before you admit you don't know?
<Allegro> true...and also, there is a difference between believing and knowing. One can not know if God exists but believe in God.
<jbc> just as one can not know but believe in a lack of one
<Allegro> Warner: I wouldnt entertain the magician's game ;)

<Nevaeh> I'm in college, it's illegal for me to be rich.
<Nevaeh> Manduatory to be poor and intellegent.
<Nevaeh> intelligent.
<Nevaeh> *sighs*
<Nevaeh> shutup.

<Jon> When you assume, you make an ass of you and me
<Jon> Only it's really 'u and me' so you are only making an ass of yourself, in the end
<Iota> i never did like that statement.
<Iota> since the me is indicative of the person making the statement, which is always the person who isn't doing the assuming, which is sort of self-insulting.
<Alcar> all assumptions are insulting.
<Alcar> Including that one.

<WackyFunster> YOU: "Man, I can't believe it, I got over 5,000 hits today on my Fred Durst Fanart site today."
<WackyFunster> VERY INTERNET PERSON: "I remember when my site was getting 5,000 daily hits. That was like a year ago, now we're around 10,000 daily."
<WackyFunster> YOU: (Furious) "Well... well... what I meant to say was that we get 5,000 hits MONTHLY, not daily!"
<WackyFunster> VERY INTERNET PERSON: "So you actually get less traffic than that each day?"
<WackyFunster> YOU: (Confused) "I mean, no, what I meant was that... OH I JUST GOT AN EMAIL, IT TURNS OUT MY HIT COUNTER WAS BROKEN, I GOT 15 MILLION HITS YESTERDAY, WOW!!!"
<WackyFunster> VERY INTERNET PERSON: "You have thoroughly defeated me on the Internet. There is no reason for me to continue living anymore."

* Alcar thinks Gosd is pro-cloing. God made man in His image. If that's not cloning, what is it?
<arious201> oh yeah, the adam and eve story.....strange tale.
<Alcar> eve was cloned from adam, as well,.
<Alcar> God made her from Adam's rib. I don't think it needs to get more explicit.

*** Jesus_Is_King is now known as Satan_Loves_You
*** WackyFunster is now known as Elvis_Is_King
<Elvis_Is_King> Satan_Loves_You: You ain't nothin' but a hound

<Jayleena> didja see the Conan O'brien where Hopkins was proposing a plotline for the 4th hannibal movie?
<Jayleena> Lectre going Vegetarian and everyone scrmbling to try and protect their Faba bean feilds

<ArthurQ> I once emailed the professor that wrote the textbook i was using
<ArthurQ> It was for my People Power and Politcs class
<ArthurQ> I asked him how he was gonna talk about 9/11 in the next edition of the book
<ArthurQ> and he wouldnt tell me because he was afraid of sensorship!
<Alcar> "9/11 has shown that people do hav power, even against megalomaniac and monolithic evils such as great nations that think the can do anything. What this provs is that we all have powqer, we just need to use it constructively.. Class Discussion topic: Is droping air=craft on large buildings a constructive form of social criticism?"

<Chaos`^> what's the deffinition of being damned?
<Alcar> Go straight to hell. Do not pass go. Do not collect

* Alcar had been considering the university of Fernando Poo
<|337C4Bb4g3> Alcar: I was going to go there!
* Alcar was going to get a PhD in sometjhing like library science and be able to say "Let me through, I can help, I'm a doctor!" at murder scenes, then proceed to contaminate evidence by throwing up on the corpse

* Keith wants to be the amarican ambasidor to Fernando Poo
<|337C4Bb4g3> It's part of our history, man!
<Farthes> one question
<|337C4Bb4g3> Farthes: The answer is 'yes'
<Farthes> if he got held captive, would they have "took a poo"
<Keith> well i never heard of it befor, then again i'm not to big in history with in the last oh 600 years
<|337C4Bb4g3> Keith: It's not very well known, in general
<|337C4Bb4g3> Because it's a pretty small island of no real strategic significance
<Keith> sounds like the perfect place to retire too
<|337C4Bb4g3> It mainly produces violent revolutions
<|337C4Bb4g3> and lots of them!
<Alcar> sadly, they're hard to export.
<|337C4Bb4g3> It's a lot like Sierra Leone
<Keith> if your into the shooting your naber thing
<|337C4Bb4g3> Except richer
<Keith> oh bigger guns and more bullets got it
<Alcar> keith - it's better than america. At least when you kill your neighbour he is dead. In america you sue him and bleed him dry :)

<|337C4Bb4g3> But I have had entirely too much experience with the US Govt. and I can tell you that the people in charge here are a bunch of stupid assholes who just do things more or less at random
<|337C4Bb4g3> For the most part, in any case
<Keith> its goverment/polotics
<Keith> one had is up there ass the other is taking the check
<Keith> the ass hand only comes out near voting sesson
<aslhk> |337C4Bb4g3: indeed, certainly not at random! The pattern emerges when bribes are graphed!

* Alcar finds it interesting in a scary way. Government replaces government, but most things won't really change. Revolutions end and become the government they were before, in one shade or another. And the govnerments that were pro change quickly change thir tune when they realise how nice things that, so they tel everyon "don't rock the boat" over and over...
* Alcar is guessing the only thing that will dismantle nations is one big rebellion or if they become too expensive to maintain.

<Tass> boredom consumes me! When is grievewood starting officially, or has it already?
* Sin{away} shruggles.
<Tass> shruggles?
<Tass> thats a new one
<Sin{away}> It's kinda a cross between a shrug and a convulsion
<LadyIslay> lol
<LadyIslay> shruggle?
* Sin{away} noddles

<yetifemme> IRC is the divine provider
<yetifemme> It gives, and gives, and gives! Little matter that it leaves us only pale and fragile husks attatched via optic nerves to its various interfaces
<yetifemme> Want a book? #bookwarez has it! Feel like playing in the grass beneath the sun? #warez has GolfPro for you! Romance? #HotTub is the answer! Or perhaps #gayteen!
<yetifemme> Feeling depressed? #suicide.bus.stop can offer advice on putting an end to your misery! Feeling like IRC is just stealing your soul and leaving you empty and bereft of life? There's probably a channel for conspiracy theory crackjobs like you, too!

<Baliadoc> i hate lawsuits.
<aslhk> I don't. If we're going to have stupid laws, we may as well have stupid lawsuits!
You're not cat food lady, but you're good lookin

<o____o> Kristin, complimenting physical features only gets guys slapped
<Kristin_Hartnett> not if it's something non-sexual like hair or eyes
<o____o> Actually I'd never hit on a girl who "looks like she's spent a while on her hair"
<Tandaco> "that shit on your head looks beautiful. do you wash?"
<Kristin_Hartnett> even nails or elbows, feet
<Kristin_Hartnett> well, maybe not feet, she might think you're a freak
<o____o> I stay far far away from high maintenance ladies
<o____o> Kristin, I've found that the non-physical works best for me
<Tandaco> "has anyone ever told you you have the most attractive pancreas i've ever seen?"
<Alcar> "Hi, I think your hair folicle engineer did an excellent construction job on your, uh, folicles on the top of your head. They're very retina-attrative. Did I mention that you seem to have really nice teeth and your skin tone seems to show an exceptional red blood cell count?"
<Alcar> Look for whats on the inside :P
<o____o> Its whats inside that counts, and we're all ugly when you remove the skin.
<Tandaco> "wow... i love intelligence. can i have your brain when you die?"

<CrypticDeva> aslhk and I were joking around about going and applying for really crappy jobs and seeing how silly we could make the interview ;b
<CrypticDeva> they always ask things like: So why do you want this job?
<CrypticDeva> Even though it's a crap job that NO ONE would want
<CrypticDeva> "Well, Bob, let me tell you: I've always wanted to be a tool of the conspiracy, wasting my life in some pointless, mindless, lousy, dead-end job for crap pay! This has been my dream, ever since I've been a small child! In fact, I wrote a poem/song about it... *stands up and recites really bad poem/song*"
<CrypticDeva> Alternatively, you could go in and randomly deny that the illuminati exists, and start saying things like: I buried my $3000 in my backyard the other day *wink* So when is your underground agent going to contact me?
<Alcar> "I aapplied to become a wage slave at this McDonalds in order to find out why postal workers who have decent, better paying jobs with benefits come into work one day with a gun and shoot everyone. Incidentally, do you know there is a firing range just two blocks away and I can buy a pistol at Walmart if I work here over 2 months?"

If pornography is a technologically sophisticated traffic in women then snuff by extension is a kind of high tech lynching. We face the nightmarish possibility that male viewing of films and videos of actual sexist murders could become a normalized cultural institution in the United States. -- Catharine MacKinnon

<Onryo> Are you all well?
<aslhk> I am rarely certain what I am referring too, either
<Tandaco_ditched> i am indeed... apart from a small migraine from smoking newsprint
<Onryo> smoking newsprint? kids these days stop at nothing for a thrill. I thought frolicking was your pastime . . .
<Tandaco_ditched> what planet are you from? i ran out of cigarette papers and couldnt find a bible
<Alcar> a bible? LOL
<Tandaco_ditched> Onryo: yes, but i couldnt be stuffed
<Tandaco_ditched> Alc: they work... thin paper, gives off a bluish flame

we need to have wars to show anyone who doubts it how fucking retarded we actually are

war is a bunch of poor dehumanised sods killing each other in the mud, because a couple of jumped-up politicians want to make money

if you smoke after sex. you're doing it too fast.

<stoneygrl> okay wait i wouldn't fuck animals
<stoneygrl> only mike jackson
<stoneygrl> oh jesus
<subgumby6> would you have sex with animals if say 50 bucks was involved?
<stoneygrl> fuckin irc
<stoneygrl> this is what i get for being a hermit
<stoneygrl> nope
<subgumby6> are you stuck on irc?
<stoneygrl> never ever never ever ever never
<stoneygrl> but glass bottles are another sub
<stoneygrl> i'm stuck on fuckin earth
<stoneygrl> with pretension slobs like u
<stoneygrl> no wonder i'm a case
<subgumby6> how big of a glass bottle we talking?

* jjbc notes that the invisible man would be the ultimate porn star

<stoneygrl> i'm sorry i'm being a major bitch
<stoneygrl> i'm raggin hard
<subgumby6> i feel like im on mind vacation right now
<subgumby6> i dont care, i deal with bitches day long
<jjbc> you're a vet, subgumby6?

<Chaos`^> My college english instructor tells me if I die I have to call her to get my assignments =(
<Chaos`^> she says if I can't do that I have to call her as soon as I'm resurected

"Do not let the grim priests of tradition tear out the very heart of the spontaneous currents that carry the insight of Eternity." -- Ken Carey

the duckbill platypus is absurd, yet it exists

I mean, if you can't prove something is true, the fact that nobody can prove it's NOT true doesn't mean you somehow "win" ;-)

<Kinkaid|> the idea of a universe is that there isn't anythiong outside of it.
<Alcar> Kinkaid - Uhm.....
<Alcar> Since when?
<Alcar> I suppose you've never heard the theory that universes mate, or that black holes send the energy they "take" to other universes so universes are parasites of each other?
<Kinkaid|> dont start this multiverse junk
<Alcar> What makes it junk?
<Kinkaid|> its a completely unproved theory, and shouldn't be any example
<Alcar> The idea that there is just one universe is unproved as well.
<Kinkaid|> then dont try to prove and unproved theory with another unproved theory
<Kinkaid|> it doesn't make sense
<Alcar> Nothing makes sense if you think about it.
<Kinkaid|> I try not too

<CrypticDeva> anal-retentive, self-absorbed, and too ignorant and delusional to do any harm
* barking_frog nods
<Alcar> Probably all that's saved the world from utter destruction
* Alcar grins
* barking_frog cries a little
<CrypticDeva> lol
<CrypticDeva> or utter salvation ;b

<CrypticDeva> amazon.com tried to sell me a 'hole shooter' for $300!
<CrypticDeva> What do they take me for?!
<aslhk> what in the world is a hole shooter?
<CrypticDeva> i don't know
<CrypticDeva> and I am much happier for it, I'm sure

I have at least 6 cases of ADD

<ArthurQ> I seriously think that we should only allow highly qualified teachers, scientists and engineers into the country that have already been trained and have potential to creat more jobs. Then only allow tourists here to spend money. No work visa's or 6 month visa's or education visa's
<ArthurQ> No more of this "marriage into the country"
<ArthurQ> if you marry someone, go live in THEIR country.

<Tandaco> anyone know of any missionary positions going?
<Alcar> going where?
<Tandaco> doh... my genius pun is wasted here :PPP
<CrypticDeva> Tandaco: a/s/l?
<CrypticDeva> ;)
<Tandaco> 3,216/hermaphrodite/north pole

I'm going to go into the feild of genetic research so that I can tell women "I'm just trying to get into your genes." Yes, I am a dork. Thanks for bringing it up.

see -- here's my position -- I'm OKAY with folks being devoted to their religion. I'm OKAY with them proclaiming that their religion is the one and only accurate religious way for them. I'm OKAY if they want to proclaim that every other way is wrong for them. But I'm NOT okay when it turns into: and my way is the only right way for YOU.

i am a christian only because i happen to have been born in the southern part of the usa.....had i been born in saudi arabia i would most probably be a muslim

<barking_frog> personally, I don't think that it's possible to determine whether or not reality is objective or subject, but I don't see how anybody could ever "see" objective reality, since "seeing" it renders it subjective
<Alcar> Objectivity is subjective :P
<barking_frog> Alcar: stfu :-P
<Alcar> stfu?
<barking_frog> Alcar: you don't know that one?
<Alcar> nope, don't think so.
<barking_frog> Alcar: [s]hut [t]he [f]uck [u]p :-)

Do things that don't actually exist exist?

To answer your question, I'll....answer your question.

"Fall? Hell, no! I just hung out with the wrong crowd! I thought it was some party, Lucifer held the best one, and I just followed along .. but I can't go back because He can't admit He's wrong. It's that infallibility thing."

<CrypticDeva> If you won't be a better person tomorrow than you were today, what do you need tomorrow for? <--- To put off what I can do today ;b

<ArthurQ> hey....whats the song from Ghost busters 2
<ArthurQ> when the statue of liberty is walking
<Baliadoc> good question. i can't remember.
<Alcar> "Hey Pretty Lady, Show Us Some Leg?" :P

<paledream> What may be my downfall: i think of too much at once, & get sidetracked extremely easy. Take, for example, my general web browsing pattern: 50+ windows open, most of them all to do with different bits of knowledge/disciplines
<barking_frog> paledream: "anal," "cumshot" and "group" don't count as different disciplines

beliefs are for people who haven't found elitenment

<Reykemias> i know you're julie, i'm around here enough. reykemias is a character i haven't used for a long time. my nick isn't my character, it's me...since i generally am myself around here
<Veronica_Velvet> so.. what is your real name.. if you wish.. so i can identify you as a person as well
<Reykemias> i don't have one :-p

(Quit: The empiricist ... thinks he believes only what he sees, but he is much better at believing than at seeing. --George Santayana)

* Alcar thinks it's a buge coincidence that some grey matter not even a yard/meter accross can conceive of universes billions of light years across. How do you explain THAT as a random by product of human evolution :p "Well, those aniimals run awfully fast.."

(Quit: I feel like I'm climbing up a cliff using a rope attached to a branch smaller than my forearm whose roots have such a tenuous grasp on the cliff face that a stern wind is likely to sever all ties between the branch and the cliff, and my rocky affair with reality, in a spectacularly gruesome event.)

<Sintaqx> I copy and pasted the pages from the SRD into the script box and told it to do what it should.
<Sintaqx> unfortunately it did what I told it to do instead.

<CrypticDeva> Although with inflation being what it is, I am actually practically MAKING money off of my loans ;b
* Alcar blinks
<Alcar> That's a new one :p
<CrypticDeva> it's true ;b
<CrypticDeva> 6% inflation vs. 5.75% apr (deferred 3 years)

* CrypticDeva is trying to come up with a name for everything
<CrypticDeva> (that was a subtle pun! ;b)

I have a question. What is the question "What is the meaning of life?" actually asking for?

* CrypticDeva wonders where all the virgins come from
<CrypticDeva> especially in a religion where guys get to have 4 wives
<Alcar> all those children Allah kils when they're young?
<CrypticDeva> muhammed married an 8 y/o, so I dunno about that ;b
<Alcar> aborted featuses (sp)?
<Alcar> NM, that's a bit too sick
<Alcar> "Well, they are virgins .... " "I want to go to a new heaven!"

<aslhk> and what about doing something enjoyable which will almost certainly get you killed?
<aslhk> is the purpose of life to get the greatest enjoyment over the longest period of time possible?
<Alcar> aslhk - Terminal Boredom = Enjoyment? :)
<Tandaco> aslhk: such as?
<aslhk> Tandaco: sky diving without a parachute
<aslhk> some people would find it exhillerating!
<aslhk> raping the mob boss's daughter!
<Tandaco> aslhk: that's suicide, not enjoyment
<Tandaco> rape isnt fun...
<aslhk> There are many examples of things which may be enjoyable to a person which could (and probably would) result in death
<aslhk> Tandaco: perhaps you do not feel that rape is fun, but there are many individuals (most of whom are in jail) who would beg to differ!

I think assuming that the desire to rape is genetic is unfair to children of rape victims

Anger is so much more convenient than compassion

<Tonitrus> Life is a sexually transmitted disease that is always fatal.
<GeminiRai> Air is always fatal too
<GeminiRai> 99% of people who breathe air DIE less then 100 years after exposure, but that's not topically oriented
<Tonitrus> GeminiRai: Actually, air is fatal. It's really reactive. It shreds the lungs.

Jeramias> I'm not a deepthinker when I'm supposed to be and I am deep when I'm not supposed to be. I'm just basing this off of random guesses and not how deep you are actually supposed to be thinking on a daily basis
<Jeramias> But I doubt that other people are trying to figure out ways on how to spit water into their ears without turning their head.
<aslhk> you're probably right
<aslhk> can one use a fan?
<Jeramias> nope
<Jeramias> Nothing but a mouthful of water
<Jeramias> I can get it into both ears at once, actually. Probably not a useful tallent though.
<aslhk> that is amazing

And I realized "what point is my life? I sit around and watch tv while I'm chatting on the computer. I should write a novel or something to at least occupy my time. I should at least think!" But then I realized "if you have to force yourself to think, then isn't it rather pointless?" and then I realized "that's a bloody revolution, I should put it in my book!" And so I put it in my book that I will never write.

I've already conqured "grungy preppy." Heck, that is me every day. I wear preppy clothes, and then I don't shave or comb my shaggy hair ;)

<Dry-ice> my question is: if before jesus came only the jews could goto heave. who the hell are the non-jewish gods ?
<Alcar> other gods? :) Christianity just tells ppl not to worship other gods, not explicitly that they don't exist. If memory serves, I think thew quran does say that the other gods don't exist. Not sure.
<Dry-ice> ok, and what makes my sin (without jesus) any diffrent then a jews sin (without jesus) ? :)
<Alcar> lol. Because Jesus commands us to sin? I mean, if he died for them shouldn't we commit them to honour his memory?

Well I personally don't like the idea that when you die you're still just your body and you just lie in your grave waiting for the world to end when you rise up all zombielike and eat people, then go to heaven.

<ManaKnight> Okay so I don't get this...
<ManaKnight> Superman died, and there were suddenly 4 supermen to take his place
<ManaKnight> Jesus dies... and we get 4 cheese pizza.
<ManaKnight> Similarities?
* Alcar doesn't see the link between jesus and pizza
<ManaKnight> 4 Jeaz pizza

It's nice to know that we can always replace loved ones when they stop meeting our needs!

<aslhk> but I don't want to make f00d!
<aslhk> This is almost like that part in Hamlet where he's like "to be or not to be" and such
<aslhk> perhaps I should go insane too!
<Alcar> "To make or not to make, that is the cook book.Whether tis nobler in the stomach to suffer the pains and cramps of a thousand failed recipes or take arms against a sea with tums and by opposing - end them!
<Alcar> Hamlet then goes to McDonalds
<Alcar> took a few secs to recall that speech :p
<aslhk> lol, the real one, or the one you just posted?
<Alcar> The real one :)
<aslhk> Alcar: *laugh* I thought so!
<aslhk> but I was also prepared to believe that you had, for some reason, invented the cook book speech before!
<Alcar> To go out, to cook no more. And by going out to say we end, the heartburn and thousand natural cramps the flesh is (hair too). Tis a constipatiomn not devoutly to be wished.
* Alcar isn't that weird :P

<Keith-Oni> oh well back to the sloter
<Keith-Oni> unless i am needed for some reson
<aslhk> we would never dream of interrupting a game of oni =P
<Keith-Oni> hay i just leaned the move that lets you spin around a guys neck like it was a stripper pole
<Keith-Oni> nice move by the way
<aslhk> that is *not* how I would've described it
<Keith-Oni> to bad it doesn't kill the pole in one run

<aslhk> there's a contest every year in which a number of chat bots and humans talk to a number of human judges
<aslhk> each guesses tells whether the "person" they talked to was a bot or a human
<FirestormZero> and so far the bots have failed every time
<aslhk> hah, they can't fail!
<aslhk> but that's not the point
<aslhk> one is said to "pass" the Turing Test if more than 50% of the judges think he's human
<aslhk> supposedly one of the human contestants failed

All the good preachers went to hell, too

What use is a journey when one is already at one's destination?

<Chaos`^> this is sung to a folk song right?
* Alcar has no idea
<Chaos`^> oh.. ok..
<Chaos`^> is there a beat to it or is it a poem untill you give it a beat?
* Alcar has no idea if it has a beat yet. Just tried to write a song :p
<Chaos`^> I see

* barking_frog thinks he came up through the manhole
* barking_frog realizes "The Manhole" would be an excellent name for a gay bar :-/
<[francesca]> That is very funny. And true!
<jbc> "excuse me, may I push in your stool?"

friend of mine in #computers had his /quit msg set to "erection reset by queer" for quite a while :-)

bisexuality would be cool, if only males were aesthetically pleasing in any way whatsoever

* jbc thinks all females should be bi, and the male population should be halved

* ArthurQ is starting to realize why there are so many cases of spousal abuse out there........its not cause of evil men......its all the fucking evil women that drive em nuts

The Republicans, by and large, do not participate in international affairs, unless you count "Bomb the world" as participation

Two nuns were bicycling to the parish church one morning from the convent, and one nun says to the other: "have you ever come this way"? hTe nun says "no, it must be the cobblestones"

<barking_frog> stupid question... if I'm on Windows XP, how do I know what user I'm logged in as?
<petrel> id
<petrel> jk
<barking_frog> oh... never mind ;-)
<barking_frog> I just saw the username spelled out in giant letters at the top of the Start menu :-)
<petrel> thats so stupid its funny

there are instances accross the world, where if an animal attacks a human. no matter what ammount, it is put to death. yet we have moved into animals lands, and killed them needlessly. the world doesnt revolve around the sun. the sun revolves around our beaches

like the comedian said, if experimenting on apes with electricity can cure humans of cancer, all i can say is red is positive and black is negative

<kalvaan> what happened to the spirituality and philosophy discussions?
<barking_frog> kalvaan: they died
<barking_frog> kalvaan: you're welcome to take a shot at starting one back up ;-)
<kalvaan> what does it take? :)
<virgio> An attitude
<AlcarGM> depositing $500 in my bank account?
* AlcarGM looks hopeful
<barking_frog> I'll do it for $400!
<AlcarGM> I meant canadian tho!
* AlcarGM wins!
<barking_frog> AlcarGM: a hollow victory when I'm defeated because your currency is worthless :-P

I *USED* to be extremely philosophical, but I got better ;-)

<virgio> You can only claim that the way is to not proclaim the way if: (a) you're Taoist or (b) You have a bigassed grin on your face because you recognize, and fully enjoy, the irony/paradox in saying so....Of course, (a) and (b) usually overlap.
<virgio> Fark! I'm never going to be a guru with phrases like "bigass grin" :l
<virgio> "To see the centre of the souluniverse, my son, you have to sport a bigass grin."

<Kattelyn> the study of religion helps us to understand ourselves and what makes us tick
<Alcar> Too bad it won't tell us what makes us tock, too :)
<ShadowMistress> Alcar: u might wanna try jungian psychoanalysis to find out more about what makes us tock
* Alcar shrugs. IMO, it's silly anyhow. All analysis seems to boil down to is looking in a mirror for something and trying to be surprised that you find what you're looking for.
<ShadowMistress> i dont agree Alcar....so u always find what ure looking for ?
* Alcar would say we do. We just don't admit it to ourselves. It's not like we can analyse ourselves and find out stuff that goes beyond the system of anaylsis, and we make the system. Sort of a catch-22 I guess.
<Alcar> I mean, if I decide to analyse myself I can't find stuff that isn't there, not really. It would be loke figuring out what's in your hand. It doesn't change, but out perception of it might change (say, after discovering that there are lots of layers of skin, or whatnot)
<barking_frog> Alcar: the most fascinating thing about the sort of thing you just said is at first, it sounds like you must be a manic depressive. You have to dig into it before you realize that, no... it's only if you DON'T see it that you can be depressed
<barking_frog> Alcar: it's bloody well impossible to communicate that to people without sounding like you're trying to brainwash them

I wish that I had more time to spend learning. Unfortunetly I have to go to school instead :(

what I disagreed with was this notion that it being "2002" means people who disagree with you can't exist

Alcar is NOT doing to compare a cool movie like Dogma to crap like Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back :p
<aslhk> Alcar: you just did!
<ArtQ-AFK> ...dude....grr
* aslhk wins!
<Alcar> LOL aslhk. Good point :)

<ravetildon> anyone know how to apply the service packs to winxp and office xp that have been blacklisted?
<Alcar> Yes
<ravetildon> ?
<ravetildon> I'm listening very closely right now!!
* Alcar forgot it.

I think that's part of the problem women don't approach me is cause I look like I'm a homeless man

why do you think aliens have BIG eyes ... there is less sun light at mars

<Caltak> wow these two lions killed 138 men... there were Indian workers building a railroad through Kenya and these two lions were killing the workers and this hunter guy came in and eventually got them.. they said it mightve been because they had a weak/broke tooth, but they say they mightve been a genetic mutation because they had no mane, and they were larger, and were "abnormally intelligent and hard to hunt."
<Caltak> personally I think it just makes sense, I mean... If you find a food source thats a lot easier to kill, wouldnt it make more sense to hunt it instead? :) I mean really...
* Leech_Wilcomes wonders if they are just 2 lions who were shaved to see if they look like thoes furless cats.. and when they noticed they looked different the people who cought them were upset and shot them up on drugs and let them out

<Kristin_Hartnett> What do Budweiser and sex in a canoe have in common?
<James_Valentine> they both suck?
<Kristin_Hartnett> they're both fucking close to water
<RadioRaheem> they both are not conducive to multiple orgasms?

Do you have anything useful to say, or just verbal diarrhea?

Hot women should invest in air conditioning.

"I know I was born and I know that I'll die, inbetween is mine" - I Am Mine, Pearl Jam

<SecretSamadhi> Kit, this physical world which this life opperates has many experences
<^Kit^> you don't say

* barking_frog feels that ordinary reality is plenty complicated enough without adding imaginary realities to it
<aslhk> barking_frog: I imagine your "ordinary reality" is primarily imaginary =-P
<barking_frog> aslhk: that's a good point :-P

<SecretSamadhi> and you dont have to believe me either Kit. :) you could just drop it :)
<aslhk> drop the universe?
<Alcar> On atlas.
<aslhk> I hope someone catches it before it gets away =P
<CrypticDeva> aslhk: I guess that lends new meaning to the phrase 'drop everything' eh? ;b

<Alcar> Hmm, I doubt anyone has all the answers. But most people seldom accept a differing world view that claims to have answers. And since neither view can be "proven" ....
<CrypticDeva> Alcar: I do! =)
<CrypticDeva> I steal all the good stuff that I can! ;)
<^Kit^> Alcar, that's why one should ask more questions than provide answers.
<CrypticDeva> Er, did I say 'steal?'
<Alcar> Kit - But that's the problem. Most people don't ask questions they don't want answers to. If someone asks "What is A?" They're generally really asking "what do *you* think A is" because they already have their own idea of it.
<CrypticDeva> IMO one would have to be a fool not to want to benefit from others' experience and wisdom, as well as ones own. =)

I believe that reproduction is evil. If nobody had reproduced, we wouldn't have any problems like we do today.

Humans may be smart, but the vast majority of us are a little too smart for our own goods, and not nearly smart enough, at the same time.

<aslhk> I would like to clarify something here: I am against all reproduction, not just human reproduction
<aslhk> I am even against photo-copying

<TheHellsAngel> aslhk so why not commit suicide?
<aslhk> TheHellsAngel: what does being against reproduction have to do with suicide? the damage has already been done!
<TheHellsAngel> the process to end can begin with yourself.
<aslhk> TheHellsAngel: why do you assume that I want to destroy things? Why not let them run their natural course before fading into nothingness?
<Alcar> TheHellsAngel - Naw. Better to just live a long life and get ahold of some nukes and take everyone with you. More effective :)
<TheHellsAngel> reproduction is a natural course.
* CrypticDeva makes a note to live FAR away from alcar =)
<Alcar> Suicide note no one will ever read: "Reproduce THIS!"

<CrypticDeva> Everything is natural =)
<Alcar> Except CrypticDeva.
<CrypticDeva> If it can occur, then it is natural
<CrypticDeva> Alcar: I am the exception that proves the rule! ;)
* CrypticDeva snickers

People often just make the mistake of assuming that because something is not currently described by scientific theory that it is not natural

* Alcar has this horrible urge to say reproduction is unnatural because it violates the 2nd law of thermodynamics....
<Alcar> if the universe tends towards disorder than life, by creating order, is really a big middle finger to the universe and....
* Alcar stops now.

Where did life come from, if reproduction is the natural source of life?

<Alcar> The Founain Of Youth, A Myth By Alcar
<Alcar> A father takes his sun to the Fountain ofYouth. "Son, this is the fountain." "All these old people?" "Yes." "But dad, they have breasts on the net." "Those are breasts, my son." "Oh. *gagging sounds*" "They digitally enhance the visuals on the net."
<Alcar> Later the man phoned his widfe. "Dear, you don't have to worry about Joe. He won't be having dates anytime soom. I took him to the Fountain of Youth Home For The Elderly."
<^Kit^> Alcar is silly but correct
<Alcar> It worksw for both Kit and aslhk's ideas! Not only are breasts the fountain of youth, they can also prevent reproduction
*Alcar sighs. I wonder if the Weekly World News is hiring. "Breats Prevent Reproduction" would be such a cool cover story.
<CrypticDeva> Alcar: They do if they're big enough! ;b

<MrPhysics> i missed the thing that prevents reproduction
<MrPhysics> what is it?
<Alcar> MrPhysics - Breasts.
<MrPhysics> oh
<MrPhysics> um well breast feeding delays ovulation
<MrPhysics> is that what you mean?

<Tandaco_> looks like Australia wont be going to war in Iraq with you guys....
<Tandaco_> we'll be declaring war on indonesian terrorists
<MrPhysics> oops now we will never win

war for greed is better than war for ideology

every country in the world is capitalist.

<TheHellsAngel> I do not agree with alot of american policy.
<TheHellsAngel> but alot of it is unavoidable.
<TheHellsAngel> since there are no other solutions.
<TheHellsAngel> welcome to real life.
<TheHellsAngel> get a helmet.
<Tandaco_> bullshit... war is never a first option... bush is an absolute wanker for not going the inspections path
<Alcar> Bah. As long as people want to wave their phallic symbols at each other and stockpile weapons to promote "peace" and think peace has to be forced and never really want it, they'll make sure no other solution works.

You're so cute, and.. illegal.

<Alcar> Oh, gods that was fun...
<Alcar> <Alcar> Has it occured to people here that monsters are *made* not born? They get made by their society.
<Alcar> From the stuff I wrote for the 2nd lolad campaign :P
* Alcar finds this funny. I can turn a comment about a fictional were tiger into part of an anti-war rant.

i suggest you ask before you attempt to rudely rip someone a new asshole.

the difference between thought and action is usually opportunity

<MrPhysics> christ had a messiah complex
<Alcar> LOL MrPhysics. I could see someone turn that into a book :P "Jesus: God or someone with a Messiah Complex?"
<MrPhysics> how are hitler and jesus alike? they both had a messaih complex
<Alcar> MrPhysics - We definitely have a potential novel here :)

<Alcar> TheHellsAngel - SO what? The war'll happne no matter if the people want or not want it. They're irrelevant.
<TheHellsAngel> yes it will Alcar.
<TheHellsAngel> and I both support it, and loath it.
<TheHellsAngel> such is the dichotomy of war.
<TheHellsAngel> you think I like death Alcar?
<TheHellsAngel> I come from a military family.
<TheHellsAngel> I dont want this war as much as you do.
<TheHellsAngel> but my personal feelings mean nothing when measured
<TheHellsAngel> to the acendency
<TheHellsAngel> of our race.
<Alcar> to the what? :p
<TheHellsAngel> continuing the human race.

War is the ultimate stupidity of mankind

most of our troubles today stem from people with very good intenetions trying to set the world right

who was it that said communication between the sexes breaks down because women want to vent and men want to solve problems?

<^Kit^> regis philbin frightens me.
<^Kit^> mostly it's the shiny ties. that can't be natural.
<^Kit^> I think he's wearing plutonium around his neck or some such thing.

<^Kit^> one has to anticipate a little... that's part of active listening but too many people are just waiting to talk. god bless chuck p
<Alcar> 'I am listening to you, so will you shut up and stop interupting me!"

you judge based on your need for acceptance

metaphysics means "I'm a nut and you should end the conversation now before I decide you're my friend" ;-)

* Now talking in #religion
* Topic is '|| Welcome to #religion ! || Does Love have an opposite? If so, what is it? ||'
* Set by Primordian on Tue Oct 15 12:34:27
* Alcar looks at the topic
<Alcar> Marriage.

<jbc> ... formulas explain the model, they don't cause reality
<jbc> they're the map, not the territory
<lifting_frog> and interestingly, if you factor in Godel, they don't even do that

There is no *formula* writ small upon the structure of space. A formula *describes* what is.

* lifting_frog has found that indifference, or something very much akin to it, is the "secret" to peace

<Reykemias> i need a website with stupid online games that will amuse me for a short while
<Alcar> Reykemias - www.microsoft.com has a game called Internet Explorer. You get to see how many error messages you can send to them in a hour. Best player gets a free copy of netscape.

(Quit: I am just an atom in an ectoplasmic sea, without direction or a reason to exist. The anechoic nebula rotating in my brain is persuading me, contritely, to persist.)

<Keith`> i've heard roomers of it running in parts of canada once a year or so
<ArthurQ> heh
<ArthurQ> "Invasion America" running in Canada...

August 6: America strikes back: the anniversary of the courageous bombing of Hiroshima (and three days later, Nagasaki), which ended the war with Japan. God gave America the power to destroy these cities, as He similarly destroyed Sodom and Gomorrah.
- http://cryaloud.com/christian_backlash_aaron_webster_enola_gay_pride.htm

an excellent book he wrote was titled "the denial of death" and after he wrote that he commited suicide

<MrPhysics> remids me of when i was in chiropractic school and we were taking a urinalysis class
<MrPhysics> as a joke the whole class ate asparagus at lunch and the next day the lab stank to high heaven
<MrPhysics> the professor didn't laugh
<MrPhysics> he was wise to us

<MrPhysics> hehe we were all walking around with a vial of our own warm asparagus pee
<RadioRaheem> asparagus piss would be a good name for a band

I saw the Red Dragon, that was kinda stupid but I like Lecter anyway, he makes me laugh

<barking_frog> I went in to buy a pair of 16MB RAM chips for $310
<barking_frog> good deal!
<barking_frog> I didn't know much about computers at the time, so I asked a manager if they were returnable if I bought the wrong chips by mistake
<barking_frog> it was explained to me that I couldn't do that, 'cause I might take them home and copy them
<GeminiRai> copy ram chips?
<barking_frog> they had the cheapest price in town by a fair margin, though, so I went all the way to corporate until I got somebody to say I could return them
<barking_frog> and I had to! Three managers up to and including the store manager couldn't understand that they weren't software

(Quit: The opposite of love is not hatred but indifference. Thus, the opposite of beauty is not ugliness but indifference. The opposite of education is not ignorance but indifference. The opposite of life is not death but indifference to life and death.-- Elie Weisel)

<cooking_frog> ^^traxXx^^: we don't share our ideas about religion. We already KNOW the answers. We're just here to listen to people such as yourself, who come in seeking guidance
<cooking_frog> ^^traxXx^^: share your confused perception with us, and we'll set you on the true path

<Allegro> the original religion is probably the need to survive
<Alcar> That's almost too pragmatic to be a religion :P
<Allegro> but people are quite fervent in their passion about it when they are faced with death :)
<Allegro> and we have developed many rules and principles geared to keep us alive
<Allegro> and we are told that if we do not follow the religion (that is, we dont want to survive) then we must be crazy
<Alcar> So that could make the people who say we're crazy priests.. WHich means that either psychiatrists are modern priests or talk show hosts are
<Allegro> and we are told that if we do not follow the religion (that is, we dont want to survive) then we must be crazy
<Alcar> hehe. True.
<Alcar> So that could make the people who say we're crazy priests.. WHich means that either psychiatrists are modern priests or talk show hosts are
<Allegro> Alcar: talk show hosts are not human...they are a new species branching off from australiopithicus republicus conserva :P

<RadioRaheem> strangely, insanity has been a mark of divinity
<Alcar> RadioRaheem - Makes sense to me. What better thing to do with nuts than lock them in a monastery?

oh, everyone was gay before Frueud

<Mickey^> but have you heard of the siamese twin, who had there bodies joined?
<Mickey^> now you might not believe in the law of cause and effect, but those two twins had there bodies joined because in the past life they were very attached to one another gay people, why do you see so many people with joined bodies these days?

modesty never stopped neitsczhe from having biographies written about him

And so Confucius said: The wise man learns from the sage and the fool alike. Considering the sage, he finds qualities that he wishes to emulate. Considering the fool, he finds qualities that he wishes to cleanse from himself. Thus it is that wisdom and folly are equally valuable on the path of the way.

<Mickey^> humans are not animals
<Mickey^> this is because humans have the technology
<Mickey^> within them to attain salvation
<Mickey^> and to overcome there worldly attachments
<Mickey^> and attain union with god
<Mickey^> however animals arent
<Mickey^> as they are instinct driven
<christy> I think having technology inside you makes you an unholy cyborg :/

<Mickey^> i am not christain
<Mickey^> i praise god

<Kristin_Hartnett> i was going to say it's pointless to worry about what another person does between the sheets
<barking_frog> Kristin_Hartnett: if you're the one who has to do the laundry, then I think it becomes something to worry about

freedom is a road seldom travelled by the multitudes

<ArthurQ> oh wow....
<ArthurQ> I guess i was wrong then
<ArthurQ> Alright, scratch that advantage
<ArthurQ> The guys at nintendo are the dumbest living fucks alive
<Caltak> so in other words, you meant the Game Boy ADvance has the biggest game library in history :)
<ArthurQ> well....
<ArthurQ> i could still be right

<Keith`> so they took the biniary files of nes roms and printed them out??
<Keith`> no there has to be some fermware involved
<ArthurQ> Ferm?
<Alcar> stuff made in the amazon rain forest?
<Alcar> Oh, wait, that would be fernware

<aslhk> BagOfGroceries: how can you be so certain that not every girl hates you!?
<BagOfGroceries> Because there is at least one!
<aslhk> BagOfGroceries: those that seem not to hate you could just be attempting to get close to you to further their plans to cause you horrible pain and agony and the like
<aslhk> I saw it in a movie!
<BagOfGroceries> But while she's pretending to not hate me she'll develope real feelings of nonhate! That's how it works outside of the movies!

<En_Sabah_Nur> join the crowd Caltak
<Caltak> NEVER! I am an individual, and I swear to God, I kill each and every other person just to prove it!
<Caltak> er, ahem, pardon me.

<_Erich> god is just as real as a greek god
<_Erich> or a roman ora norse god
<_Erich> theres no proof he exists
<_Erich> seeing is believing
<Alcar> Erich - you just said god didn't exist. it hardly improves your arguement to say that god is just as real as other things that don't exist. Lots of things don't exist. Morr than do exist, really, if you take into account honour, justice, love and the like
<Alcar> believing is seeing more often than not.
<_Erich> convince me that there isa one true god
* Alcar never said I believed there was one true god, so why should I convince you said god exists?

<Allah^idDie4U-JIHAD> Faith isnt rational. its just something you belive or not. intelligence or stupidity has nothing to do about being an atheist or a beliver.anyway, one thing is for sure: Belivers are happier than atheists. if you belive in god you can live more peacefully. you dont ask your self about the meaning of life. you dont scare about the death, you have an explanation for everything.
<Alcar> What is rational?
<Allah^idDie4U-JIHAD> Of sound mind; sane.
<Allah^idDie4U-JIHAD> Consistent with or based on reason; logical: rational behavior. See Synonyms at logical.
<Alcar> So .. people are rational if they're of a sound mind. Who determines they are of sound minds? How can you prove the people making that determination are sane? It's an endless cycle.
<Dry-ice> Alcar: my shrink said something like "If you don't want people to think you're crazy. don't act crazy" :)
<Alcar> lol. Easier said than done :)
<Alcar> But the point of that was that nothing can really be said to be rational, if one is being picky.

Well if there's a god that cruel in the world, I think it'd be somewhat heroic to stand up to him. To accept your fate in hell knowing you can't win. WHy bow down to a tyrant? Just cuz he has ultimate power? That's awfully spineless if you ask me

<trompah_besi_II> God is the most compassionate and most merciful..those who repent and do good deeds will be rewarded and given paradises
<o____o> Its all reward punishment, like yer an obedient doggy
<o____o> not a man
<Alcar> But if god is all merciful he'll forgive us anyway because he made us and our natures. Forgivenes is his profession
<trompah_besi_II> ur His creatures..u have to obey His little rules, following the rules will distinguish between u and ur dog
<Alcar> Besides, dogs obey rules better than humans. Or is it just a coincidence that dog is just god spelled backwards?

<Tandaco> no... not the religion that states it.... the ANCIENT EGYPTIANS, not the religion, discovered Ra first of all gods... they were only following Ra for like 1000 years or so, then other gods came into it
<Tandaco> for that 1000 years it was Ra or nothing
<Tandaco> hence, Monotheism
<virgio> Tandaco: According to whom?
<Tandaco> according to shit written on walls and stuff... buggered if i know, from the history books
<virgio> Tandaco: Yeah. Sorry. That's not going to do it :-)

<SilverHorse> the VC RP board
<Reykemias> has it changed since i posted?
<SilverHorse> erm, was it bright pink when you posted?

<FirestormZero> who the hell are all these new people
<FirestormZero> why am i not an op and BagOfGroceries is?
<ArthurQ> ive been here longer then you FirestormZero
<FirestormZero> ok, you have seniority :)
<Baliadoc> so has BagOfGroceries ;)
<ArthurQ> cept she's fuckin alcar
<ArthurQ> least i think so
<ArthurQ> o.0
<ArthurQ> oh thats Jer?!
<ArthurQ> i though that was salem
<Baliadoc> AQ is utterly confused. this is fun :)
<Baliadoc> that was the most interesting way to explain how Jer got an op that i've ever seen :)

<jbc> Imagine you were ruled by some jumped-up little dictator with his $0.20/lb medals all over his uniform that has people dragged off to the torture chamber forever for daring not to love him enough...
<jbc> imagine you were called before him... imho, the brave man would spit in his face, the smart man would keep his head down and say 'yes, sir', and the crawling gutter-slime would fall at his feet in adoration
<jbc> wouldn't you agree, nev?
<Nevaeh> The cool man would offer him shrooms.
<jbc> No. nonono. You do NOT want god getting stoned.
<o____o> jbc, god isn't stoned?
<Nevaeh> Why not? You're just as well to be not the only having delusions. :P

(Quit: Don't you know [your] name yet? That's the only answer. Tell me, who are you, alone, yourself and nameless? -- Tom Bombadil (J.R.R. Tolkien))

<Alcar> did you know that the bible is against tongue piercings?
<Alcar> * TheScripts []KJV[] James 3:6 - And the tongue is a fire, a world of iniquity: so is the tongue among our members, that it defileth the whole body, and setteth on fire the course of nature; and it is set on fire of hell.
<aslhk> lol
<aslhk> interesting interpretation

<CrypticDeva> The insane often find exactly what they are looking for, wherever they look =)
<Alcar> CD - By that definition 99% of humans are insane.
<CrypticDeva> Alcar: I'm glad you noticed =)

<blue0ne> if I do not eat.. I get hungry
<blue0ne> thats my ulitmate reality

'A raft is a useful tool for crossing a river, but only a fool carries it for miles upon his back.'

(Quit: The main way I have changed [since September 11] is in my attitude to religion. I used to think religion was harmless nonsense, entitled to at least some respect. I'd now drop the 'harmless'. And the last vestige of respect" (Richard Dawkins))

<Alcar> The apple/pc debate is even worse than most religious ones....
<aslhk> Alcar: it's fun because it never goes anywhere, and it's never done by people who know what they're talking about!

<CrypticDeva> aslhk: On the other hand, I'm not sure if emulating things that have tiny little brains, and oversimplistic behavior patterns is the wisest move ;b
<CrypticDeva> Although many people would disagree
<Alcar> CrypticDeva - You're saying that 100,00 lemmings are wrong?!
<CrypticDeva> Alcar: Oh, not the lemmings, just the OTHER animals
<CrypticDeva> I think most people SHOULD emulate lemmings

(Quit: "There's no 'I' in 'team,' but there's a 'we' in 'weapon.'" Catapult Master)

<Caltak> How do you fit an elephant in a subway?
<Alcar[semihere]> car or tunnel?
<Caltak> car
<Alcar[semihere]> how big is it?
<Caltak> you're um... really overthinking this...

<Baliadoc> true. some are much worse than others, though.
<Baliadoc> like National Things are Worse Than You Want Them to Be week.
<aslhk> I don't celebrate holidays you don't get off work for

<jbc> how many senses are there?
<Coris> Two. Sense and nonesense. :p
<MrPhysics> 2: common sense and book learning

<jbc> *shrug* I see no reason to believe in any conciousness or other organised entity that created or manages the universe
<MrPhysics> jbc: nor do i
<jbc> everything seems to be explainable on a cellular-automata model of a few simple rules - which physics attempts to uncover
<MrPhysics> all except why is there anything at all
<MrPhysics> which is a good question: why does anything exist at all

<MrPhysics> but seiously. life is more like a song than a journey. a journey has a purpose. to get to the destination. but for life, the destination is death. the purpose of life is not to die, but to live. just as the purpose of a song is not to get to the end . if that were ttrue then the best conductor would be the one who got to the end first.
<MrPhysics> and if the purpose of dancing were to get to a certains pot on the floor, you would just walk over there and stand
<MrPhysics> same with life

why does no one make a bigger deal out of the fact that "U.S." spells "us" in the classic, us-and-them sense? will future history smirk at this irony when they describe us as the epitomization of all that was Rome?

* spaceman5 is in a great mood
* Alcar is too. I beat my record for most consecutive days I've been alive
<TheShrike> Alcar, you should be a spokesperson for Alex Chiu's Immortality Rings... "I've worn a ring for a few days now, but I've been alive for (insert age here) years! It's so amazing! Thank you, Mister Chiu!"

have you ever heard of the guy who said that in order to feel successfull in his life, all he had to do what wake up and see that he was above ground?

(Quit: When we draft young men for a war, we reject the physically unfit, the mentally inferior and the norally deficient - leaving them home to reproduce the race while we send out the finest stock to be killed; this is called "Defending the future of the nation")

if there are two things i hate, it's people who are intolerant of other people's cultures and racial backgrounds... and the French.

<Caltak> "Jesus must go back to college... on a planet populated by lizard men." THis game is fun :)
<Caltak> ^that was a show idea I pitched. :)
<Alcar> err, for what? :p
<Baliadoc> lol
<Caltak> Primetime Pitch
<Caltak> its a fun game on pogo.com

<Alcar> Voice from the clouds: "Human 1.0, human 1.0 .. ah, there you are. Damn. Made a right mess of things, have we? TIme for a recall." voice fades "Wait a minute, *can* I damn myself?"
<Baliadoc> "Sorry guys, I really fucked up with this whole human thing. I'm gonna need you to all come back to heave and try again. Don't worry. I'll figure it out. I think I need to focus more on those lovable penguins. Smarter, faster penguins. Yeah."
<Alcar> "Hmm, oh my Me! I was in even worse shape when I made these than when I made that platypus. I need a drink."

<ArtQ-Sleepin> yet religion holds on to books that are thousands of years old......that contain mostly fictional stories of events that never happened
<ArtQ-Sleepin> Also......consider this!
<ArtQ-Sleepin> God cannot be a man!
<ArtQ-Sleepin> If god was a man, he'd be gay!
<ArtQ-Sleepin> Think about it
<ArtQ-Sleepin> What male entity in his right mind would create another male entity first!
<ArtQ-Sleepin> If god was male he would have created woman first!

<ArtQ-Sleepin> most religious leaders claim them ot be true
<ArtQ-Sleepin> Im still telling you
<ArtQ-Sleepin> If god exists
<ArtQ-Sleepin> its a bitch!
<ArtQ-Sleepin> no doubt about it
<ArtQ-Sleepin> Seriously!
<ArtQ-Sleepin> Only a WOMAN would send thousands of men to fight over HER name.

<JoShMiR> who knws abt religion
<Dry-ice> JoShMiR: anyone
<JoShMiR> umm
<JoShMiR> well ok
<JoShMiR> which religion is the true of them all
<Dry-ice> which ever one you want

Myself, I just work out because if I didn't have the stamina to make love 15 times a day, what kind of stud would I be?

<aslhk> I think it would be easy to 'make love' 15 times a day
<aslhk> that's like once an hour
<aslhk> and you get nine hours sleep!
<EmptyBag> Yeah, but it wouldn't be easy if I wasn't in shape.
<aslhk> I don't know
<aslhk> I think anyone could do a minor exertion once an hour
<EmptyBag> You wouldn't! Ha!
<aslhk> the 'Ha!' really made that comment
<EmptyBag> Minor? Maybe if you're only interested in pleasuring yourself. That's why you're unexperienced.
<aslhk> I thought studs were just supposed to be trying to get their partners pregnant
<aslhk> isn't that the meaning of the word? =P
<EmptyBag> Wait, I think you're confused. I was refering to supporting building walls.

<JoShMiR> i worship ALLAH almighty alone
<JoShMiR> and i bear witness that there is no god except HIM
<Dry-ice> allah... isn't that just god in a diffrent lang. ?
<aslhk> Dry-ice: sort of. It's more like "The One True God Who 0wnz J00"
<aslhk> obviously referring to the great script kiddie in the sky

<Alcar> Most people see evil as so prevalent and overwhelming they either have to make Satan bigger than the bible does, claim god is weaker than people think or actually take responsibility for their OWN actions. Most pick a :p
<Allegro> Alcar: true...reality it far to scary a choice..for it would mean being responsible for possibly making mistakes in life and risking the security that Satan brings when its really all his fault :)
<Dry-ice> I like how all temptation is the devils failt :)
<Alcar> Yeah. I think it sucks that the devil gets all the blame and god all the praise.
<Dry-ice> I don't blame god though, but it seem shadeing :)
<Allegro> or the devil gets all the praise for the fun stuff ;)
<Alcar> It's like miracles. "Oh, joey fell down the well and was unhurt! It's a one in a million chance!" is a miracle, while "The oil rig broke at the exact wrong moment and blew up, killing 30 people. It was one of those one in a million chances, officials said" is NOT a miracle. It's a bias that only the good stuff is miraculous.
<Alcar> lol Allegro. Good point :p

<EmptyBag> TV needs shows with fart jokes, apparently. Whatever.
<EmptyBag> It'll never change unless I take over the world
<EmptyBag> But that won't happen for another *looks at his watch* six minutes. And I'm not that patient!

<Alcar> god isn't infallible, at least not in the OT.
<turd_furgison> lucifer
<turd_furgison> one of his own angels
<turd_furgison> he is soposed to be all knowing
<Alcar> turd_furgison - That was part of the Divine Plan. Satan was manipulated.
<Alcar> God is really a CEO.
<turd_furgison> he should have known that lucifer would have turned against hiom
<Allegro> Chief Eternal Officer?

<turd_furgison> so why the hell do i deal with you
<ThomasGarner> turd_furgison: I think you were trying to prove that you think

Science - The art of until further notice

(Quit: Humans made guns, bombs and atomic bombs, but the most dangerous thing that humans ever made was a man with nothing to lose.)

I'm not opposed to biased test(an unbiased test is impossible and would be useless), as long as its the right bias

I firmly believe that many people are too stupid to understand the limitations of their intellectual abilities

calling someone 'stupid" is never objective

<Munin> Allegro: either the person doesn't posses the data on a topic of which they speak, or the data they have is innacurate, incomplete, or simply wrong
<Allegro> I agree with that
* Coris thinks almost all people have the latter.
<Coris> And refusal to admit it causes most arguements :)
<Jestar> bah i admit that
<Munin> its a common condition, and usuall not noticible, that is unless the person is particularly stupid and chooses to talk about things as an authority when they lack a foundation
<Jestar> starting arguments is a good way to pass time
<christy> Jestar: you do not! :P
<christy> Jestar: Is not!

there isn't an energy to mass conversion going on inside the womb

<Allegro> Munin: true...I try never to assume ;)
<Munin> Allegro: you do it all the time
<Munin> we have to assume many things, or we would spend all of our time disussing trivia
<Allegro> Munin: like I said...I try not too
<Munin> Allegro: no you don't
<Allegro> yes I do
<Munin> Allegro: you assume that when you type 'chair' that it means basically the same thing to me (or whoever you are addressing) as it does to you

<christy> in my envisionment, there's a blackboard with a crudely drawn stork on one side, a tangled mess of equations in the center and spilling around the margins, with a bold, frantically-drawn arrow pointing to a baby on the other side of it
<christy> and some kind of representation of the earth spiralling out of the orbit of the sun, UNLESS THE BABIES ARE STOPPED

<IrOnMiR> any one wana know abt islam
<IrOnMiR> clik me
<Alcar> \/me is sorry, I already have the one true religion
<Alcar> hail eris.
<IrOnMiR> how do u know its true?
<Alcar> Because She spoke to me through my pinneal gland

<Alcar> Oh, one thing: The..
<Alcar> _____________Man thinks of squirrels__________
<Alcar> Narrator: You know what you really want!
<ArthurQ> yea?
<Alcar> you know what you really want seems .... I don't know .... I thought of squirrel and nuts came to mind :)
* Alcar was wondering if it was some weird sex ad for a second :p
* Alcar doubts most people would, tho.
<ArthurQ> HAHAH!

its ok to be a muslim unless I want to get some cyber sex

<virgio> Alcar: Literature is a shifting category, true, but generally something has to be well-written to be considered so.
<virgio> Not just influential
<barking_frog> virgio: I dunno... take a look at Johnny Got His Gun
<virgio> barking_frog: I never heard of that, I'm sorry.
<barking_frog> virgio: Dalton Trumbo. It's an excellent example of poorly-written literature
<virgio> Eheh. I'll have to look into it, then.
<virgio> So I can disagree, of course :l

friend of mine has the theory that "literature" is a book that a college professor decided to stake his career on, and succeeded

(Quit: Truth is the shattered mirror strewn in myriad pieces as each believes his own infinitismal bit to be the whole.)

<jbc> if I had one[a hermaphrodite], and didn't assign - I'd raise them to revel in their differences
<Colm> how?
<Colm> Child: "Look what I brought for show and tell!" Teacher: "Oh my God!" Child: "But daddy says it's a good thing. I bet you don't have one!"
<jbc> LOL
<jbc> you know what I mean

the etymology shows you how the word came to be what it is....This doesn't mean the use of it changes or is only strictly within the origins of the word.

science keeps 'wat actually is' and 'what should be' separate - so as to keep existing notions of what should b from interfering with the discovery of what actually is.

the truths we find are the truths our parents found

* vorpalblade has left #religion
<TheShrike> hmm... but I didn't hear a snicker-snack
<Coris> 'twas a paddy wack. Budget cutbacks.
<TheShrike> hmm... yep, a new company bought the whole works, cut down all the tumtum trees, shot all the Jubjub birds, and now all the Bandersnatches are working in a Nike sweatshop
<TheShrike> I hear they're frumious about the whole deal, but they can't seem to get unionized
<Coris> and the old man is chortling in joy because he's making a killing off of tourism. And a certain pour boy is in jail because Jabberwoks were endangered and he has no weapon liscence for his vorpal blade

<barking_frog> petrel: isn't a skull crusher considered a curl?
<petrel> i never heard that term
<barking_frog> petrel: what kind of curl would you do to isolate your triceps?
* Kristin_Hartnett can't wait till exercise isn't "in" anymore

<Kristin_Hartnett> If you turn yourself on does that make you gay?
<petrel> nope
<ThomasGarner> hrm
<ThomasGarner> I think it does
<petrel> narsicistic
<ThomasGarner> or at least bisexual!
<ThomasGarner> yeah, but that doesn't mean you aren't gay, too
<barking_frog> do gay/bi people get hot looking at themselves?
<barking_frog> that seems kind of odd

<petrel> just because i think im beautifull that makes me gay?
<Colm> petrel - Of course
<Colm> I mean, how could you think that and NOT be happy?

<barking_frog> what I hate is when you pick a girl up at the bar and then you get her back to your place and find out she's really a guy
<barking_frog> I *HATE* when that happens
<ThomasGarner> barking_frog: hah! you just need to be a bit more open minded! =P
<barking_frog> ThomasGarner: that's what he said
<barking_frog> ThomasGarner: except he wasn't saying it was my mind I needed to open

<Allegro> we are talking from the perspective of our minds
<|337C4Bb4g3> I'm not, I'm just talking
<|337C4Bb4g3> My mind is busy with more important things

A lot of people complain about how hard it is to quit smoking. Well, my grandfather is 67, and has been smoking for 55 years. He has absolutely no trouble quitting, and does it several times a day. So don't even try to feed me that line. If you want to quit, just quit. Quit whining while you're at it. (see above paragraph).

Trolling is the purest, and most guileless form of communication

* aslhk is writing about the Alien Mind Rays which make our early memories fuzzy
<Alcar> aslhk - What are you ....
<Alcar> Uhm, what was that you typed?
<aslhk> Alcar: I am stating that the fact that most pre-schools attempt to make five year old children take naps at odd ours like 10am is indicative of aliens tampering with our minds
<aslhk> because no HUMAN would come up with such a ludicrous idea
ArthurQ> dude
<ArthurQ> its just so the teachers can go play cards
<ArthurQ> they make them sleep so they dont do any actual work
<ArthurQ> its perfeculy human
<ArthurQ> its called sloth!
<aslhk> lol! You think that getting a large group of children to take naps is *sloth*?
<aslhk> how many kids have you been around?
<Baliadoc> my sentiments exactly :)

not to sound like a pig, but women are in the bed too. if they don't speak up at some point, how are we to know ?

<aslhk> [QworG]: you're comparing klingon to greek/latin? =P
<[QworG]> aslhk: Not that much of a difference
<aslhk> [QworG]: other than the wealth of classical literature and history available in the first two?
<aslhk> you, sir, are a sick man =P
<aslhk> Not much difference indeed.
<[QworG]> aslhk: Granted, yes there are differences of chronological nature but out a of any societal merit what else would be the difference?
<aslhk> I could see comparing klingon to Tolkien's languages or esperanto or the like
<aslhk> [QworG]: the point is that there is a wealth of information available to those who speak greek/latin which is not available to those that don't


* Alcar[afk] seriously wants to know how they'll make daredevil without offending every blind advocate group..
<Allegro> there are blind advocacy groups? as in advocate groups that are blind?
<barking_frog> Alcar[afk]: why do you think they'll be offended, rather than liking it?
<Alcar[afk]> because people get offended really easily
<RadioRaheem> well they can't even see the damn movie
<Alcar[afk]> "They're making light of his blindness! It's just a plot gimmick! He might as well be sighted because he does all they can, and better."
<Alcar[afk]> "Hey, you're right, he does! This is discrimination against people who aren't blind and get hit with chemicals because they'll just die!"
<barking_frog> RadioRaheem: maybe they'll release a braille version
<RadioRaheem> it may be offensive to portray blind ppl as those who cannot dress themselves appropriately, but repeatedly wear red pajamas everywhere
<Alcar[afk]> And we haven't evne gotten into the red devil imagery :)

<barking_frog> Nevaeh: talked to Rima last night... she caught up with me and gave me the message
<Nevaeh> Did she say she would stay gone?
<barking_frog> Nevaeh: she sounded like she was thinking permanent, but you know how that goes :-)
<barking_frog> Nevaeh: all us regulars belong in a 12-step program, on here ;-)
* Alcar joined a 12 step program, but it was interfering with irc so I had to quit it :)

<Nevaeh> We are all just jagged pieces of the same glass - broken by some stressed waitress calling herself God; therefore, some of us will fit together while others remain shattered.

<RadioRaheem> we could never successfully invade china
<RadioRaheem> nor hold N. Korea if they decided to poor troops over the border
<RadioRaheem> er pour
<Alcar> lol!
<Alcar> "We plan to poor our troups. We got the idea from Canadian military spending."

<DJ^Krush> kiffin1: Your claim that there is no truth, to contain any validity, you must assume to be true - see the contradiction there?
<kiffin1> nope
<Alcar> Just because it's a contradiction doesn't mean it's not true DJ^Krush!

<NeCrOsls> yes.some christian r uniterians but they dont accept mohamed as prophit
<islam-man> but u say
<islam-man> but we accept
<islam-man> jesus
<islam-man> muhammed
<islam-man> moses
<islam-man> we accept all
* Alcar accepts anyone as as a prophet, if they want to be. The standards don't seem very high :)

If they think they're religious who are we to say they're not? Belief/faith is subjective so if someone decides to become Christian and go on a killing spree and murder fig trees, they're right in their faith since jesus killed fig trees and said he came to bring a sword and not peace *grins*

<DJ^Krush> Alcar: Religions all have a certain doctrine, and it is easy - even for an outsider - to discern when that doctrine is contravened
<Alcar> DJ^Krush - I'd disagree with that .... most do have some basic teneants, but it all lies in interpretation of them and their context and what you want them to mean.
<Alcar> Mind you, a militant buddhist would be really hard to justify, but it could be done I suppose...
<kiffin1> militant buddhist....lol
<Alcar> heck, you can justify anything in your mind if you're determined enough :)
<kiffin1> i would love to meet one of those
<DJ^Krush> Alcar: They mean what they mean, if your interpretation is false because of what 'you want them to mean' you only have yourself to blame
<Alcar> How can a interpretation be false - it's an interpretation :p

* Alcar thinsk the war on drugs will end when the US realises that the drugs can only be stopped if no one takes them and declares war on it's own citizens for using the drugs. No users = no use for the drugs.
<WarezBert> mass government tainting of all incoming drug products? what gets you high... gets you dead, today!

(Quit: "Cronies are judges. Congress is controled. Dissent is ignored. The Media is bought. The Economy is sinking. The Surplus is gone. The Debt is exploding. War is peace. Freedom is irrelevant. Ignorance is strength. Bribery is free speech. Propaganda is truth. Bush is president.")

is it a coincidence that monogamy and monotany are so close in spelling?

I, however, have a suprising revolution, but because of my spanish accent people think that I am discussing evolution

<kiffin1> i don't believe in hell or the devil/satan
<VanRonson> Ditching the bits that don't suit you, hmmm?
<kiffin1> yep, VanRonson that is exactly what i am doing

<Alcar> Most people decide they have to believe things they don't like, but they seem to end up finding a way to make it fit regardless .... by oftne changing what they don't like. Simply not believing the parts you don't like makes more sense to me :p
<jbc> alcar, that's the scariest thing I've heard in a long time
<Alcar> jbc - So that makes it true? :)
<jbc> heh. Twit.

<Alcar> The problem is that people seem to think self-delusion is a bad thing, when it's not. Everyone deludes themselves to some extent all the time. Say, that your signifigant other really loves you, the day at work wasn't *really* that bad .. and that's not evne getting into how we rewrite our memories.
* jbc wonders what the HELL planet he's on
<[francesca]> Many times what we decide is true actually becomes true for us
<VanRonson> YES.
<VanRonson> We do.
<VanRonson> That doesn't mean we should stop trying NOT to delude ourselves..

* Elana-Silvereye has joined #Game1
<Elana-Silvereye> I cant connect to Dal
* Elana-Silvereye Quit (Read error: Connection reset by peer)

Unfortunately my younger sister is like the arechetypal blonde airhead. She once told me that she doesn't buy CDs because "music goes out of fashion"

rofl@#atheism topic: 'If God made us in His image, and we don't believe in Him, does that mean he has self-esteem problems?'

<jbc> so, being omnipotent and having the power either to utterly destroy or completely isolate his greatest enemy... God instead sets him loose on his most beloved creations, there to tempt them into eternal torture and pain.
<christy> who're we to tell god what he can get off on?! :P

<Caltak> Let's all take wagers on the last digit of pi. Not that it has anything to do with Hubris. Or does it? Perhaps there was a little known hero in Wichita, Kansas known as Obscure Fact Man who indeed knew the last digit of pi, but was killed in the nuclear blast-- or at the very least was wounded and knocked his head on a wall, stone, or other suitably hard object and forgot.
<Caltak> Thought that's not likely.
<Caltak> But nothing ever is, until it happens a whole bunch of times.
<Baliadoc> right...
<Caltak> left.
<Alcar> the last digit is 8. but sideways :p

<[francesca]> Alcar Hah! I tried taking deductions for donations! And then I found out that I have to donate a certain percentage of my total income before I can take a deduction! I'd still donate, but that was NOT a welcome discovery.
<[francesca]> Alcar They don't feed you enough at communion to make a meal of it
<Alcar> LOL fran. That IS sad.
<Alcar> Yeah, but the soup kitchens should :)
<[francesca]> Alcar Well it's not like I've tried that... I'm just making an observation. Jeez.
* [francesca] turns red with embarassment.
<Alcar> LOL fran. That IS sad. <-- was about the donations :P
<[francesca]> Alcar OH!
* [francesca] turns new shades of red

Should murder for the purpose of canniballism be prosecuted less harshly in court, since it's less wasteful?

if the Christians are right, everybody else is going to Hell. If the Muslims are right, everybody else is going to Hell. If the Buddhists are right, we're all already IN Hell

<Chaos`^> brb, have to cleam ny keyboard it's sticking keys
<Caltak> ewww Chaos, TMI! j/k :P
<Chaos`^> eeeeeeeeee3e3rsder54sderwsderddfgedeewewewewewewewedsdfgtyhuiop[oiuytzxcvbnm,./

<jbc> /server -m mclean.va.us.undernet.org 6667
<jbc> and /join #scripture for an hour (especially during busy time)
<jbc> sad, innit alc?
* Alcar is afraid.
<jbc> I used to troll there ;)
<jbc> in fact, it was your IRC quotes page, alc, that made me investigate this place
<Alcar> lol. How'd it do that?
<jbc> it mentioned this place a few times, in the midst of some truly mind-numbing quotes
<jbc> it just had to be cool :)

<jjbc> okay, I want to be a catholic! >strain< ... Do I believe it all yet? mm, not quite. Try some more... >nnnnggghhh!< ... there! .. NOW it's true!
<Alcar> jbc is giving birth?
<morsheh> is it true jbc?
<[francesca]> jjbc I waited until I was ready to make the decision - I always knew that being agnostic was temporary. I can't tell you how I knew, but I just knew. I was taking a break before I took a fresh start. So it was only an intellectual decision in that I decided to follow my intuition.
<jjbc> Alcar: I was wondering about the process of conversion
<jjbc> no, morsheh. I was illustrating.

Just because no one is right doesn't mean everyone is wrong.

how is changing your beliefs when you understand that you have changed them dishonest?

<Sewak> jjbc, who invented this philosophy?
<jjbc> um, I'd always assumed everyone invented it for themselves.
<jjbc> so surely, in the name of all things purple, you can't change your intellectual views while your intuition stays fixed
<jjbc> without knowing you're a liar
<jjbc> okay, this has *always* been one of my most basic underlying assumptions
<jjbc> I never had to spell it out before, as I always assumed everyone held it as well
<jjbc> and I'm vastly disturbed to learn that it's an optional feature
<jjbc> how on earth do people think?

I'm a born-again virgin. *nod nods*

<WackyFunster> Kristin_Hartnett: And maybe try some alpha hydroxy type stuff on your face, for better skin tone
<aslhk> does that stuff work?
<Nevaeh> It didn't for me.
<Nevaeh> It made my skin oily.
<aslhk> I don't have skin on my face
<Nevaeh> Then put it on your ass. o.o
<WackyFunster> It exfoliates!
* Alcar watches OPEC kidnap Neveah as a resource for oil....

<leylaa> i think it is a good topic
<leylaa> what's wrong with it
<WackyFunster> leylaa: Other than being immature, obnoxious flame-bait, you mean?
<leylaa> better than other hate inducing stuff ive seen
<Alcar[away]> Isn't religion about inducing hate though? *looks confused*

<Kristin_Hartnett> I'm going to name my children afro names.
<Kristin_Hartnett> Like Shaquandramaria.
<RedPermanentMarker> Thats not a name, that a direct result of constipation.

Confucious say, "man who think world need doctoring, must be patient"

<perion> Ya know - I've never met an enemy that I didn't get to like when we actually set down and did some caffeine
<Alcar> That's just because you gave them arenic for sugar though!

<barking_frog> It's necessary to say things that're necessary to say!
<perion> Ask a question that plows to the depths and leaves no bystanders
<virgio> perion: Do you like milk?
<perion> yep
<virgio> Done deal.
* perion was hoping fer some ass-kicker
* virgio obligingly kicks your ass.

<Tandaco> has anything passed the Turing Test yet?
<Alcar> Smoe humans.
<Alcar> but it might have been a fluke
<Alcar> Actually, some computers have passed some limited ones.
<Alcar> Limited meaning about one subject (say, winemaking) and no trying to ask tricky questions, whatever that is
<barking_frog> Alcar: uh-huh
<barking_frog> Alcar: you don't understand about tricky questions :-P
<barking_frog> Alcar: uh-huh
<Alcar> I guess it would be ones that intentioally try and prove the person you're "talking" to is a computer
<barking_frog> Alcar: you mean, like, type your question in binary and see if it still understands you?
<Alcar> Q: "So, wine goes good with cheese, but does it go good with pie?" A: "3.14159265358979323846 does not go good with wine." "Hah, got you!"

Tree: Something that stands in the same place for hundreds of years and suddenly jumps in front of a car.

<aslhk> It is a patent truth that repetition of words or phrases causes loss in efficacy. Was the printing press our undoing?
<aslhk> Look at the Internet. Yes, there are sites which cleverly arrange words into new and interesting patterns, but are there not many more sites commonly considered useless, inane, or inaccurate!?
<aslhk> What about the "All your base are belong to us" craze?
* Alcar[afk] wants to know what is being undone, tho :)
<aslhk> Alcar: Our culture! Our ability to communicate effectively! Our ability to convey meaning through words!
<aslhk> All of these things are slowly being undermined by the massive increase in printed words!
<Alcar> Hmm. Well, culture is the sum of, well, everything if you get right down to it. So I don't see how we can lose it.
<aslhk> Alcar: hah! Fine! But, because of the very loss of meaning I have spoken of, there are many who would not have contested the sentence, but merely nodded their heads blankly!

<aslhk> that would be a neat theme park
<aslhk> it takes place in a house where you basically get whatever you want
<aslhk> with some minor setbacks, like, you know, losing your soul and ending up as a scary-looking monstrousity in a weird lake
<Alcar> Oh. The Thief of Always?
<aslhk> he did another one?
<Alcar> Ah,. Yeah, more recent one. Not sure if it's out yet, but it's the one disney got a theme park for
<Alcar> Disney doesn't need one for places that suck up souls. That would sort of embody disney :p
<aslhk> I know!
<aslhk> but I figured they'd do a good job
<aslhk> having a unique understanding of that sort of thing!

<Biophilo> Nietzsche said that we don't really read a sentence, we just "grasp some words and conjecture the meaning".
<Alcar> Biophilo - Err, then why did he write that? :)
<Biophilo> Hey, this is Nietzsche, how could I ever know ?

<Alcar> It should be funny, tho, since the novels get darker as it goes on .. dunno how they'll make the 3rd a kids movie.
<aslhk> the fourth is even darker
<|337C4Bb4g3> dark?
<|337C4Bb4g3> heh
* |337C4Bb4g3 hasn't read any of them :/
<aslhk> they have relatively mature themes for children's books
<aslhk> people die and the like

* |337C4Bb4g3 need to learn to get inspired on demand ;b

<|337C4Bb4g3> I should write a parable for "Good things don't come to those who wait"
<Alcar> "Jeff was a nice kid in school and always finished last at events. But he knew that nice guys finish last and that meant he was a nice person. One day Jeff didn't finish last in an assignment so he realised he wasn't nice and beat the crap out of the kid who finished last because all his illusions about himself had been destroyed."
<Alcar> Wait, I know.. "Anne was waiting for good things to happen to her, because she'd been told that patience is a virtue. So we waited, and waited, but even though she filled out the forms and was winner, she never got her Sweepstakes prizre and eventually went broke because she spent all her allowance on stamps."

<Alcar> "Why Jane Divorced Bob, A True Story: Jane spent her life working at menial jobs to save money for Bob's business instead of getting an education and making something of herself. But Bob no longer cared about it. When Jane realised that, she seperated from Bob but came back because she needed to be able to justify her lack of successs in life."

<|337C4Bb4g3> No, I want parables that inspire people to STOP sucking
<Alcar> Oh.
<Alcar> "Jimmy loved lollipops. He loved them so much he sucked and sucked and one day he sucked on one so hard he swallowed the entire thing and choked and died. The moral of this story: If you suck, know when to stop sucking."

<WackyFunster> I call them 'religious atheists'
<WackyFunster> And they generally are almost identical to Christian/Muslum fundies in terms of the reasoning they use, maturity level, etc.
<WackyFunster> Not to mention the annoying attempts at evangelism
<Alcar> Standing on a street corner with a sign : "Repent and be saved! Free non propaganda on how to free your mind from the tyranny of religion!"
<Alcar> Then further down the road: "More freedom, become a scientologist!"
<WackyFunster> Then there's the guy with the sign that says, "Give me slack, or give me food (or kill me)."
<WackyFunster> Watch out for that guy.
<Alcar> Actually, I'd like to see atheists on street corners seriously .. would be a fun change. "The End Of The World Is Nigh ... Because We're Polluting It, You Morons."

<aslhk> I think someone should write a book entitled, "What God Doesn't Want You To Know"
<aslhk> I don't know what would be in it, though
<WackyFunster> it should be: 475 things that god doesn't want you to know
<WackyFunster> or somesuch
<aslhk> maybe it would be about the Duckbill Platypus
<Alcar> The names of all the other omnipotent and all powerful gods throughout history? :)

<aslhk> how about, "Embarrassing Creations: 475 Things God Doesn't Want You To Know About"
<Alcar> 1) humans. 2) Neaderthals 3) Lucy 4) Charles Schultz
<aslhk> how about, "Embarrassing Creations: 475 Things God Doesn't Want You To Know About"
<Alcar> Actaully, that could work as a book ... the stuff they've found from the first mass extinction is suppossed to be really, really weird ....... "Things that never made it, and why - explaining why god murdered the dinosaurs"
<Alcar> Sort of like a kids creationist evolution book
<Regulis7> perhaps he planned on man having autos one day and knew they would manufacture gas from their decayed piles of shit and bodies?

* lauretta has joined #enlightenment_warez
<lauretta> !list
<Alcar> !no
<Alcar> !doesthislooklikeafreakingwarezchannel?
<lauretta> !list
* lauretta has left #enlightenment_warez

* Alcar just has this horrible mental image of a 12 step zen guide for self improvement.
* Alcar watches the world implode.
<Alcar> 1. "There is no self, nor is their extinction of it. 2. "there is no help, nor is there anything to be helped." 3. "There is no self help." Repeat 4 times and call yourself in the morning. If you stil think you have a self, lather, rinse and repeat.

<Chaos`^> They are really wierd
<Chaos`^> I'm looking at this cd of theirs, they have one song titled 'hooker with a penis'
<Alcar> Do the lyrics contain the word "Give that back, I'm not through with it yet?" :P
<Chaos`^> it has nothing to do with a hooker or a penis =p
<Alcar> So it's sort of like all car ads on tv that have nothing to do with cars. Actually, that applies to almost all commercials...

<LadyIslay> I've decided not to put up a Christmas Tree
<Chaos`^> how come?
<LadyIslay> Takes up too much space. Too much of a pain to get it out of storage.
<LadyIslay> and... it is hard to get real trees... when you don't have a car
<Chaos`^> that's really really really sad
<LadyIslay> also
<LadyIslay> it is hard to get rid of them when you live in the city
<LadyIslay> andcan't burn things
<Alcar> keep it up all year round!
<Alcar> By spring it can be a cactus and by late summer it can be a conversation piece of modern art.

(Quit: Confucious say, "man who think world need doctoring, must be patient")

<Jeramias> So you're not dead, eh? :)
<Alcar> Actually, I am. I've just decided to haunt you all between the hours of 2 and 4 every Wednesday.
<Jeramias> Thank god you'll be gone in two minutes
<Jeramias> Because if you're really haunting me, then you're using Mountain time, not pacific.

<Kattelyn> different, I don't think I've ever heard that outlook before
<jbc> what outlook would that be?
<Kattelyn> <Relvm> I think that the bible ment this place as to being hell considering that at the time i think their was a physical place called hell in israel or some place and that at that time the world might look like hell considering many ppl were being tourchered killed and staked and burned
<Kattelyn> <Relvm> it is as iff all of them teach the same thing.Only some religions see the teachings as a way to becoming god like and or to break free from the chain of reincarnation to this material world
<loving^boy^from^shandi> !~!~!~! Hello everyone there !~!~!~!
<jbc> you're right, that's weird

many have kids because they have sex...

* [Laura] wants to meet some wise person, kill them, and declare to the judge that "She wanted me to kill her! She was a a buddha! We have to kill them!"
<[Laura]> Then go at the judge :)

<virgio> Randomness is an illusion created lottery companies.
<WackyFunster> yeah
<WackyFunster> all events in life happen with a 50/50 probability!

I just sleep with men sometimes to prove to myself I don't like it >_<

<stare_at_some_tsql> does anyone know what a jewish church is called so i can look them up?
<barking_frog> synagogue?
<stare_at_some_tsql> synagogue thats what i was looking for
<Tandaco> stare_at_some_tsql: you're not on some Nazi trip are you?
<stare_at_some_tsql> no
<stare_at_some_tsql> i need an accountant and i need him to be jewish
<stare_at_some_tsql> for tax purposes
* Alcar[away] blinks
<Alcar[away]> that's ... new.
* barking_frog blinks, too* Alcar[away] wonders if hitler ever heard of that ... .guess not.
<stare_at_some_tsql> I heard that Jewish accountants r the best
<stare_at_some_tsql> and i need the best
<barking_frog> Alcar[away]: where does one begin to address a statement like that?
<Alcar[away]> no idea :)

<GrumpyOldBastard> a tornado, rampant in destruction as it may be, is not good nor evil. it just is.
<Alcar> GrumpyOldBastard - if it wrecks my home it's either a) evil or b) an act of God. If b, it proves god must be evil .. or I did a horribe decorating job that called down divine retribution

<Relvm> life is just a playground to learn not a place to hide thinking that everything is wrong and evil
<virgio> We should destroy the only couch that *wasn't* destroyed by the tornado while we are raging against its evil.
<GrumpyOldBastard> calling it evil doesnt do much... may feed the persecution complex and make you feel slightly better for a time, but just try and stop one. it's nature, can't defeat it
<virgio> GrumpyOldBastard: Nope. Can't defeat evil all the time. You're right.
<virgio> Relvm: it's not hiding. As I just pointed out, there's always a lesson to be learned.
<Alcar> virgio - that the world hates you? :)
<virgio> Alcar: <grins> That's certainly more entertaining than "shit happens".

<GrumpyOldBastard> why do some chicks feel the need to play with your emotions and just generally mindfuck you?
<Relvm> makes them feel smarter
<Relvm> that and they know how gulable us males are
<virgio> GrumpyOldBastard: It's about power.
<virgio> A lot of guys are out for sex. Women control sex. They use that control in less-than-moral ways at times.

<LadyIslay> how many yards in a mile?
<LadyIslay> hrm
* LadyIslay goes to the internet to look it up
<Alcar> hmm, used to know. I forget.
<LadyIslay> if you ever need to know how many meters are in a km, you can ask me
<aslhk> five thousand something
<Warner> im getting 12,000 ft per mile hmm
<Warner> oh wait thats a mil

* Mukuru has this image of an angst poem just being every curse word, racial slur etc all shoved together into a few lines....
<|337C4Bb4g3> maybe mine shouldn't really be classified as 'angst'
<|337C4Bb4g3> it is more the 'this world is crap, my life is so hard, wah wah wah' sort of thing
<|337C4Bb4g3> i dunno what that's called
<Mukuru> Hmm, pseudo angst?
<Mukuru> pre post modern angst?
<|337C4Bb4g3> post-post-modern

<little`whip> i dont belive in god...
<Alcar> Oh.
<Alcar> Which one?
<little`whip> any
<Alcar> Do you believe in chanserv?
<little`whip> if there is any where is more than one..
<little`whip> but i dont belive theres one
<Alcar> little`whip - but chanserv exists.
* ChanServ sets mode: +o Alcar
<Alcar> See?
<Alcar> how can you deny the evidence of your senses?
<little`whip> Alcar i didnt say chanserv didnt exist.
<Alcar> But chanserv is a god, and you just said you didn't believe in god.
* Alcar is confused now
<little`whip> chanserv is Not a god.Alcar> little`whip - Liar!
<Alcar> http://www.geocities.com/chanservian/chan_index.html
<Alcar> See? Proof
<little`whip> thats no proff.. a moronr wrote a stupid thing saying a stupid thing dosnt make it proof of anything
<BoyInMid`Air> did you just call someone a moronr?
<little`whip> moron.
<Alcar> little`whip - Just because you can't understand it's complexities doesn't invalidate it at all.
<Alcar> Sorry.
* Alcar finds it interesting that all these people who say there is no god refuse to accept proof when it's placed before them. I guess people just like to wallow in ignorance and decide that if a god doesn't fit their idea of deity, none can exist.

<Alcar> IMO, all beliefs are local *shrugs* To say we know what is Real and/or True is just hubris, arrogance, or stupidity. We can't *know* - we can just guess. And to take our guesses as ultimate truth strikes me as absurd, if not a little sad.
<barking_frog> that's the difference between agnosticism and militant agnosticism
<barking_frog> agnostics don't know the answer
<barking_frog> militant agnostics don't know the answer, and neither do you
<Alcar> Well, someone else might. *shrugs* I figure any belief could be right, or they could all be right, or all be wrong ... I've just stopped thinking it really matters. What happens will be what happens.
<barking_frog> I basically believe what Alcar said, but I choose to call it atheism
* barking_frog chuckles
<\\`arner> I figure they're all wrong. people can't describe how to get downtown accurately enough to keep me from getting lost and they think they can descibe god and the after life to me with out getting something wrong?

<\\`arner> Our god is new and improved :)
<Alcar> \\`arner - God Light - Sin Free* andthe wafers taste the same as regular wafers! * Sin Free is defined as 0.5grams of sin or less per serving.
<Alcar> Hm, actually God Lite seems to be very popular. "You can read your holy books and only obey the commands you like! This means you have more time to work out at the gym!"
<aslhk> Alcar: lol! Is that the selling point?
<Alcar> of course. The body is the temple of the soul! And you can burn more caleries if you're not reading!
<aslhk> that makes sense to me!
<aslhk> Where can I sign up?
<Alcar> That's the beauty of it: everyone already has *cue scary music*

<Jeramias> I asked one of my friends if she wanted to go to a movie with us after school, and she later told me that she thought that I was kidding when I asked her :)
<aslhk> that is sad +P
<Jeramias> Then she informed me that she had a boyfriend and I said "So do I!" and she only laughed at me again :)
<Jeramias> "You are funny."
<Jeramias> "I'm not trying to be funny! You insult me!"

<SaMnMaX> The are 2 doors, one always lies, one always tells the truth, behind one of them is freedom, behind the other is certain death, you may ask them one question each
<Alcar> What are the doors made out of?
<SaMnMaX> ok,were not getting practical now
* Alcar would bring in dynamite. "Are you the door of truth, because if I go through you and die, I blow up and you become pieces so think fast."
<SaMnMaX> ok, the door shrugs, and dont care
<SaMnMaX> it's made form soemthing indestructable
<SaMnMaX> and your dynamite is imaginary
<Alcar> So is truth.
<SaMnMaX> i spose
<SaMnMaX> but thats an entirely different issue
* Alcar grins. "I'd ask if death is freedom."
<SaMnMaX> alcar
<SaMnMaX> do you know what prozac is?

An enemy you defeat and humiliate but don't kill is far more satisfying than one you kill. Victory is hollow unless you can spit in the face of whoever you beat :p

<Temera> Be good, go to heaven.. be bad, get reincarnated. There's my definition of hell :P
<Alcar> lol. WHich is hell tho? :)

Personally I think that singing praises to another for eternity would be hell. But that could be just me :)

<Cal> I think bad people should go to heaven :P
<Cal> cause to them it would be hell

I like the idea of being stuck with a really good ugly person if you were bad, and god will let you into heaven.. I'd get so many hot women that way

* Alcar thinks it's an evil plot. conspiracies dont' really exist Roswell was a weather balloon. Kennedy was shot once. They're all trying to make us distrust the govnerment and it's working. Then, finally, when chaos and anarchy have reigned the Old Ones will awaken and kill us all.
<Alcar> It's the only logical way to look at it.

a good life and death struggle with alien invaders would make life interesting

<Tandaco> the idea of an omnipotent invisible being who created everything there is is FAR more insane than beings from other planets
<Alcar> Tandaco - Why? The aliens had to be created too :p

<ArthurQ> the one where he found maggots in her pussy was hilarious
<ArthurQ> "hehehe somthing tickles!"
<ArthurQ> hahah
<ArthurQ> i almost threw up
<ArthurQ> but i couldnt stop laughing
<Keith`> then it would be a no q
* ArthurQ nods
<ArthurQ> i figured as much
<Keith`> I'm sorry but your stuck with being single for the rest of your life

bah, people are just going to get more cynical. There's nothing you can do about it, so why bother trying?

If you could create a universe, what would it be for?

<|337C4Bb4g3> I may be moving in January :/
<|337C4Bb4g3> Assuming I cannot find some ways to occupy myself here b
<Alcar> serial killer.
<aslhk> we could pull that off
<Alcar> not only do you get to be occupied, you can move too!

If The Goddess is Nature -- then Atheists are closet Goddess worshippers.

I'm not talking about personifying Nature like just some variation of Jehovah in drag here.

<|337C4Bb4g3> I know that you think that being stupid qualifies as trolling, but I can assure you that that is not the case, and that you have not once fooled any of us with your ignorant posturing from atop the gazebo of denial.
<jbc> and leet, personal attacks are not appreciated.
<|337C4Bb4g3> jbc: It was not intended as a personal attack, merely a statement of fact, and I know that you know that I am not incorrect in my assertion, despite any protestations you may make to the contrary.

<|337C4Bb4g3> [francesca]: I'm not picking on anyone =) barking_frog is an atheist (or was last I heard), and I don't hear him making ludicrous and irrational assertions =)
<[francesca]> |337C4Bb4g3 Now did I call you out specifically? No. Which makes me think you WERE guilty since you responded so defensively. ;-)
<barking_frog> |337C4Bb4g3: what the Hell are you trying to imply by that?!?
<|337C4Bb4g3> barking_frog: I have you on /ignore
<|337C4Bb4g3> j/k ;)
<barking_frog> |337C4Bb4g3: oh yeah? Well I have you on /ignore, too... and have, for weeks :-P

<sonriendo> ummmmm wonna gues what the phd field is ???
<aslhk> puhsychology!
<sonriendo> lol yeppers!!
<sonriendo> the crazy working with the crazy
<sonriendo> they always say do what you do best so i did

in chico california, if you get cuaght detontating a nuclear weapon inside city limits, there is a fine of 500$ and possible jail time

<aslhk> Person X states, "I am wiccan. What makes people who believe in God so certain they are right?"
<Alcar> Because they can burn you at the stake
<aslhk> ooh, that's a good one!
<Alcar> Hey, whoever is left alive was right because there's no one else to say otherwise :p
<aslhk> lol
* aslhk nods
<aslhk> if they were right, why aren't they around any more?

<|337C4Bb4g3> I was gonna write a post-modernish poem, too
<|337C4Bb4g3> But I have been too damn cheerful lately

(Quit: A freudian slip is when you say one thing and you mean your mother.)

<Sango-chan> master, are you there?
<Greg> yes, I am
<Sango-chan> .....
<Greg> But I told you not to contact me here. It's suppossed to be via the pentagram
<Sango-chan> you're not my master
<Greg> I'm in disguise
<Sango-chan> bullshit

<midnight_tulip> i have a question.......
<midnight_tulip> y are people.
<midnight_tulip> like me.....
<midnight_tulip> are so appealed to you know..
<midnight_tulip> uhmm....
<midnight_tulip> secrets buried in our skulls?
<midnight_tulip> u know.....
<Alcar> you mean .. hidden truths? elightenment?
<midnight_tulip> maybe.....
<midnight_tulip> see? im not making sense am i?
<Alcar> Archeology? :)

* Alcar wonders if you've been too too many motivational seminars?
<aslhk> lol
<aslhk> I considered writing self help books for a living =P
* Alcar shudders
<Alcar> self help guide to reading self help book :)
<Alcar> You could call it Dummies for Dummies!
<aslhk> "A must have, for any would-be better-person!"
<Alcar> Smaller: "That would be you."

<midnight_tulip> why are people so intent on learning the mysteries of life.'
<Alcar> Because they think they deserve answers, perhaps. Or at least a good reason for why things exist....
<midnight_tulip> y? i mean its so easy to see that there are just sumthings that are better
<midnight_tulip> left unanswred.
<midnight_tulip> y dig for the answers.
<aslhk> midnight_tulip: masochism, too much time, and indigestion all play a large part in it, I feel!
* Alcar thinks it could be that they already know the answer and don't want to .. so they look fgor new things and new ideas and try to ignore the reality ofthe Elder Gods and the stars coming right....
<Alcar> Oh, doh. Left.
<aslhk> lol
<Alcar> It's not abot searching for answres, it's about finding new questions so you can get answers you like :p

* Alcar finds it interesting that most self help really just tells people things they already know, or should know
<aslhk> most people are looking for affirmation of things they know or feel
<aslhk> not everyone has a friend willing to affirm their stance automatically when they ask for advice!
<aslhk> so, I suppose, they make do with a self-help book!
* Alcar nods. I find it interesting that that is what most peole look for in a friend .. rather than someone who will challeng them. Even among peole who are technically adults I always hear "s/he is my friend, they should have supported/agrred with me."
<Alcar> That's what a mirror is for, imo.
<aslhk> my mirror never talks back!

<Alcar> I dunno . .i guess it's when people agree with me a lot I get to thinking either I'm not thinking or they'r not thinking....
<aslhk> *laugh*
* aslhk nods
<aslhk> when I agree with someone, I try to say something to let them know I do indeed understand what they are talking about
<aslhk> so they know I am not just agreeing to be agreeable!
<Alcar> Part of it might be that people in general are so passionate about their opinions. We seldom believe that someone who disagrees w/ us has really understodd just how profound our ideas were, or ele they would agree ;)

<Kantizuni> Oh, so only MEN can have wives now?!

There are girls on irc, I know both of them...

<Tonitrus> "We are In Flames / Towards the dead archaic heaven / We are the artist and the texture / That plays with the mantel of the earth"
<Tonitrus> In this verse, In Flames explains tectonic fundamentals.
<|337C4Bb4g3> Tonitrus: Wow! In Flames are God?
<Tonitrus> |337C4Bb4g3: Indeed.
<Tonitrus> |337C4Bb4g3: Weren't you aware?
<Tonitrus> Also, as mentioned earlier in that very same song, "The green is the color of my death / As the winter guise I swoop down" In Flames expounds upon the threat of global warming.
<Tonitrus> However, that song contains words of warning: "Archaic pearls of sleep and death / The voice of December losing its breath / And the floweryard of white and grey is haunted"
<Tonitrus> Even when we overcome the problems of global warming, the frost will return and kill us all.
<Tonitrus> Not only that, but our screams will resemble a kickass guitar solo.

<SnailSlug> Crap...what's the word for the thing people do when they get defibbed?
<aslhk> spasm? =P
<SnailSlug> spasm!
<aslhk> Convulse?
<Alcar> do the hokey pokey?
<Alcar> 'Look, dear! Agnes isn't dead, she's dancing!"
<aslhk> I hope I live to see someone say that =P
<Alcar> "Dying grandmother does two step, survives 3rd heart attack." subtitle: Wants to take dancing lessons. "I never even knew I could dance!" said retired octogenarian. "God must have brought me back for this! if only Harold was alive: I know he whould have loved to dance with me."

canabalism, one of the most dificult forms of suicide

He's like a sort of semen spilling on a b horror movie. Note the way how b movies and sperm don't combine properly.

DAMN IT I forgot the entire reason I came online now

IRC quotes stuff.

Democrats don't care about Civil Rights. They only care about keeping people from being offended.

* Alcar is now known as CampusCrusadeForCthulhu
<Tonitrus> Did he sack a village?
<CampusCrusadeForCthulhu> Yes. Innsmouth :p

<Reykemias> Vaginal Discharge - Cops Suck
<Reykemias> hardcore punk band? nay! it's a folk song!
<aslhk> I don't know about a band called "Vaginal Discharge"
<aslhk> the name itself makes me shudder!

<Gemm> Shut up! Your making me depressed!
<Gemm> At least you have someone to hug, and love, and stuff.
<aslhk> Gemm: he's on the internet! He's probably lying about ever having met a girl!

irc quotes stuff

<ChuckChillout> for aquinas god has to fill all the levels of being
<ChuckChillout> so some humans have to fill the "i have a sucky life" level
<ChuckChillout> while some other fill the "I am a rock star" level
<Alcar> and most rock stars, judging from tabloids, fill both :p

<Indruh> i think the WORST is when you're reading porn and they spell it organism.
<Alcar> Depends. Could be porn based on the aliens movie.
<Alcar> "Oh, baby yes.. I'm com - ahh! I'm coming! I'm having an organism! My chest!"

<Alcar> Dear gods...
<Alcar> In the most recent edition of the LoTR 'Fan Club Official Movie Magazine', an interview with PJ states that FotR EE had 32 extra minutes, and the Two Towers EE will have 43 additional minutes. That means the extended Towers will come in at 222 minutes in length - that's a whopping 24 per cent more movie! Thanks to all who reported this! Highlight the spoilers below to read more!
<Alcar> They're making it longer?!
* Alcar wonders if it's a new form of torture
<aslhk> my god!
<aslhk> Alcar: they are teaching bladder control!

* barking_frog Quit (Quit: when one discovers a failing of Humanity, it must by necessity be an attribute of the perceiver)

<|337C4Bb4g3> But I don't believe in nihilism
<|337C4Bb4g3> I don't believe in ANYTHING any more...

<seerOfHowItIs> I have never seen God
<seerOfHowItIs> I see How It Is!
<seerOfHowItIs> Therefore God must not exist.
<seerOfHowItIs> Or possibly be invisible/imperceptible by sight.
<Arkontas> so u only believe in things which u can c
<seerOfHowItIs> Like a sound wave.
<seerOfHowItIs> Is God a sound wave?
<Arkontas> no god is not like dat
<seerOfHowItIs> Then he must not exist!

<seerOfHowItIs> GOD transcends existence
<seerOfHowItIs> So he doesn't exist, right?

<|337C4Bb4g3> Arkontas: My conception of Deity is such that if anything exists, then Deity exists, so there's really not much point in discussing it
<|337C4Bb4g3> People can say 'there is no Deity' all they like... by their own argument, they don't exist
<|337C4Bb4g3> And I try not to talk to people who don't exist
<|337C4Bb4g3> Because that's insane

<|337C4Bb4g3> Which isn't to say that it doesn't have any value
<|337C4Bb4g3> I think most religions have many valuable things they can teach us
<Alcar> Especially interesting and innovative methods to kill heretics and do evil so very cheerfully in the name of good deities?

if you can't make this life meaningful, what makes you think you are worthy of an afterlife?

<Alcar> http://www.canada.mensa.org/help.html
<Alcar> password help :p
<Alcar> Did you remember to enter your surname IN ALL CAPITAL LETTERS?
* Alcar snickers
<|337C4Bb4g3> lol!
* |337C4Bb4g3 sighs
<|337C4Bb4g3> It's sad when the 'intellectual elite' are still idiots

Confucious say, "man who think world need doctoring, must be patient"

<|337C4Bb4g3> Iota: Your sex sucks :P
<Iota> no, it's quite good.
<Iota> but the possibility remains that a movie could be better.
<|337C4Bb4g3> If I movie could potentially be better than it, then it sucks
<Alcar[work]> lol leet
<|337C4Bb4g3> A movie, rather
<Iota> this is untrue.
<|337C4Bb4g3> Iota: I have better sex with MYSELF
<Iota> braveheart is a more moving experience than one orgasm.
<|337C4Bb4g3> I laugh at you
<Iota> it would take three orgasms to beat braveheart.
<|337C4Bb4g3> ONE orgasm?

<Tsume> And he calls me arrogant.
<Iota> Tsume: arrogance isn't a bad thing.
<Iota> Tsume: i have a great deal of respect for justified arrogance.
<Alcar[work]> Bah, If you're right it's not arrogance.
* Alcar[work] grins

<|337C4Bb4g3> Iota: You're not multiorgasmic... no arrogance on your part is justified :P
* Alcar[work] runs off to add multiorgasmic to the D&D feats list!
<Alcar[work]> Or ... perhaps not.
<|337C4Bb4g3> Alcar[work]: no one would take it, because it doesn't give plusses
<Alcar[work]> |337C4Bb4g3 - come on, barbarians would take it as a matter of pride :)
<Alcar[work]> multiorgasmic + rage j/k

* Alcar[sleeping] IS tired.. I have this horrible notion to go into #christian and prove that the word of God can't be aluminium because it woulod prove once and for all of God is British or American based on how He pronouces it
<barking_frog> Alcar[sleeping]: that's...
<barking_frog> Alcar[sleeping]: I worry about you, sometimes :-P

* KingOfChaos Quit (Quit: "I don't call what I do lying. I call it manipulating events verbally to make myself look the innocent" - Zanatose Everhate)

<|337C4Bb4g3> this guy was going to manufacture and market a product called PLACEBO
<|337C4Bb4g3> It was just a bunch of color-coded capsules with inert ingredients
<|337C4Bb4g3> and a little booklet
<|337C4Bb4g3> "Studies have proven placebos to be as effective as morphine for headaches 7/8 times, so take 9."
<|337C4Bb4g3> The FDA wouldn't let him, though
<|337C4Bb4g3> They were like: Well, it would lose it's efficacy over time...
<|337C4Bb4g3> He was like: That's why we have our backup plan: Placebo Plus! Now with twice the inert ingredients!

<|337C4Bb4g3> If a christian who has a meltdown says, "There is no God!"
<|337C4Bb4g3> What does an atheist do?
<Alcar> Yeah, being an atheist is hard that way. "God damn it!" just doesn't work. "Blasted random flucuations in the space-time continum!" wold require *real* dedictation

* Banned has joined #d&d3e
* Banned has left #d&d3e (part)
<LoneGamer> that was pointless
<Cypheriel> very
<aslhk> How do you know it was pointless!
<aslhk> Perhaps it was symbolic of transitory nature of life!

<Net_Phreak> What do you guys think happens to us after death?
<Nevaeh> We have a funeral. :D

<Net_Phreak> well i mean look what happend to all those people that died...
<Alcar> Net_Phreak - You mean, decomposition?
<Kantizuni> Net_Phreak: They got buried?
<Net_Phreak> yes

<Nevaeh> I wonder if my anal fetish is a signal of how I'll be born. o.o :/
<Nevaeh> That's a shitty thought.

<barking_frog> 2oz. tequila
<barking_frog> 3/4oz. grenadine
<barking_frog> 4oz. OJ
<Kantizuni> Got it. I might try that next week. ;)
<barking_frog> Kantizuni: very good stuff
<barking_frog> Kantizuni: this is probably obvious, but I wanna make sure you realize 3/4oz. is 0.75oz. and not "three or four oz."

<I^Zeppmeister^I> alcar what makes them hypocrites
<Alcar> the same thing that makes anyone else a hypocrite.. not believing what they preach.
<I^Zeppmeister^I> no do not give me your personal belief
<I^Zeppmeister^I> it was written in mat 6:5
<Alcar> It's the danger of all rekigion .. once the dogma/prayer/rituals become cofidied, the faith gets lost. I think that's what the warning is about
<I^Zeppmeister^I> it is only your personal perception
<Alcar> Because in many ways almost all religions - heck, even zen - become hypocritcal once the mass appeal stuff enters into it. Once it becomes a thing of the mases, rather than a personal spiritual experience, hypocricy will enter
<I^Zeppmeister^I> where did you read that in the bible
<Alcar> Zep - Uhm, the views of anyone are only their personal perception. Can't be anything else.
<I^Zeppmeister^I> so thats why we have the bible to forbid using our own personal perception
<Alcar> Zep - I didn't. I did a daring thing and decided to interpret it based on the passages and what thereflected.
<Alcar> In othe words, I thinked :p

<I^Zeppmeister^I> i only believe in the bible
<Sandicas> sothen you belive partialy in summarian mythos?
<I^Zeppmeister^I> nope
<I^Zeppmeister^I> i only believe in the bible
<I^Zeppmeister^I> for it is COMPLETE

as someone so aptly pointed out, evil, live devil, lived!

<Sandicas> the elder gods
<Sandicas> the gods mentiond in the creation myth are the anciant gods
<aslhk> mentioned, ancient!
<Apsu> aslhk: Stop making sense. That detracts from the mythical quality.
<aslhk> that's true--most of the people who wrote those texts *didn't* know how to speel!
<Alcar> heh. Even if one assumes thatas true, the other issue is if the people themselvs saw it in that format. Generally, creation myths are just systems of tuth made as simple as the hearers .....
<Alcar> I mean, even if I knew that the universe was made from the waking dreams of a college student, I couldn't TELL people that. I'd have to put in in a framework they can understand and relate to. "God didn't make the world in 6 days, he pulled an all-nighter on the 7th."

<Sandicas> i dont know if its true or not... i'm just trying to enlighten people
<Apsu> ...
<Apsu> wtf
<Apsu> Sandicas: Explain this to me slowly.
<Alcar> lol. How is it enlightenment then? :)
<Apsu> You don't know if it's true or not...
<Apsu> Yet you're enlightening people?
<Apsu> How
<Apsu> ...the..

<Sandicas> the more knowlage one gains the more likely they will search for more, and then question themselves on what is the truth sbout the universe
<Apsu> Sandicas: That's beautiful - except you said you don't know the truth. Thus, you have no knowledge to offer.
<Apsu> Sandicas: Try again.
<Sandicas> wether it is true or not is no matter
<Sandicas> it is the fact that it MAY be true in some form
<aslhk> The accumulation of inaccurate information is the secret to a happy life!
<Alcar> And in other news, 2/3 doctors today recommend false enlightenment, citing the placebo effect as proof that real enlightenment is losing the war, and with postmodernism in the workings truth itself has become irrelevant. More after this message from our sponsors!"

the fact is NOBODY knows what the truth is in this life, so how can you say it is false if you dont know

How can you say that I don't know the truth if you don't know the truth?

* Sandicas has left #religion
<Apsu> Aww...
<Apsu> I hate it when the entertainment leaves early!
<aslhk> bunch of pseudointellectual bullshitters, he is thinking to himself!
<aslhk> he is right, but at least we qualify for the pseudo =P
<Alcar> aslhk - speak for yourself!
<Alcar> Err, wait...
<Alcar> :p

<Apsu> Alcar: So, how goes?
<Alcar> Oh, good. Busy working, trying to get a life :)
<Apsu> Not a...*whisper*life!
<aslhk> there's that word again =P
<Apsu> I can't stand the trauma.
<aslhk> Alcar: life is efil backwards!
<Alcar> I keep memoing life, but life has the nomemo option on :)
<Alcar> -NickServ- Info for life:
<Alcar> -NickServ- Options: Enforced, NoMemo, NoOp

<aslhk> I could never whistle!
<aslhk> One day I became frustrated at my inability and kept trying until it worked =P
<Apsu> aslhk: I tried that with being female. Still haven't gotten the hang of it.

<aslhk> free-eagle: legally, child pornography is like any picture of a naked person! =P
<aslhk> under the age of 18, in the us *laugh*
<free-eagle> no, read the law whenever you get the chance.. it states that child pornography is: pictures with children performing sexual acts or in sexually lewd posed etc.
<aslhk> free-eagle: read the cases *chuckle*
<aslhk> what a law says and how it is enforced are two different things!
<free-eagle> lawyers bend and get around the law every day.. cases have no real value on law.

* Alcar ponders what the OJ Simpson trial would be used as the case-law for....
<Apsu> Alcar: Killing your wife, being African-American and driving a Bronco at high speed!
<Apsu> Oh yeah, living in L.A.
<Apsu> Lots of people do that you know!
<Alcar> Lawyer: "My client is innocent because OJ was pronounced innocent." Judge: "Wow, you've got me. Case dismissed."

<aslhk> censorship conceals the problem, but doesn't do anything to solve it
<Apsu> aslhk: Cause then censorship would be treading moral waters.
<Apsu> God forbid.
<aslhk> I think the world would probably be worse off without censorship
<Alcar> They think if they disbelieve the reality will go away
<aslhk> because then people would be attacking people rather than paper =P
<Apsu> Instead, we gesture vaguely at 'everyone knows it's wrong' and say 'so no one can have it!'
* Alcar chuckles. Could compare that to atheists and deity :)

* Alcar changes topic to '|| Welcome to #Religion || <Sandicas> the fact is NOBODY knows what the truth is in this life, so how can you say it is false if you dont know || Why do atheists seem to think that if they disbelieve, the reality of God will just go away?'
<aslhk> now that is just antagonistic =P
<Apsu> Isn't it great?
<Apsu> And he put 'seem to think'
<Apsu> Snuggling it healthily into 'I just didn't know!'
<aslhk> yes, and casting subtle aspersions upon the "thought" processes of atheists
* Apsu tears at the beauty
<aslhk> a masterful topic *laugh*

<free-eagle> ah? wonderfull perception.. but you really need to stop mistaking your imagination for reality.,
<Apsu> free-eagle: Oh??
<Apsu> Wow! Tell me how to accomplish this.
<aslhk> Apsu: he wants you to mistake *his* imagination for reality!

* Alcar is in my game, and allI can conclude is that I can't be a solipsist - if I am, it just proves I really, really hate me :p
<RedPermanentMarker> Alcar: Rescue the princess!
<Alcar> RedPermanentMarker - I can't even do that! I keep running after the prince!
<RedPermanentMarker> Alcar: You're suppose to rescue the princess from the dragon before you do that!!

* Alcar ponders that as a definition of life. 'Life is insulting yourself."

Buddha: "Existence is suffering." 'But I'm no suffering." Buddha: "To exist is to suffer." "But I feel fine." At that point, Buddha knees you in the groin :p

.... the words 'rectum' and 'pucker' are illegal to occur in the same sentence.

<sylvander> Tolerance is a funny word.
<sylvander> It means that you don't like something, but you put up with it anyway.
<aslhk> it implies dislike =P
<sylvander> yeah!
<sylvander> So all those groups that advise tolerance seem to be saying that you shouldn't like something

<Alcar> http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/entertainment/arts/2968857.stm . A judge has ordered a US school district to put Harry Potter back on library shelves after rejecting arguments that it encouraged witchcraft.
<Alcar> People who claim one person can't make a difference just need to complain more :p

<[TK]izsmarts> I've also heard that by becoming rastafarian or whatever that..its legal to smoke pot..
<aslhk> [TK]izsmarts: that is true, but policemen tend to follow rastafarians around and give them a hard time
<GarlicQueen> [TK]izsmarts thatd be a bad reason to convert to any religion
<GarlicQueen> religion must be based on personal belief lol
<[TK]izsmarts> I know..But honestly..
<[TK]izsmarts> I love weed..I love it

'I commited the crime but it's not my fault! I had no free will!" Judge: "Very well, but I'm sentencing you to death because I, too, have *drum roll* no free will!" Lots of cheering and booing ensures, all of it predetermined by a deity with an excessive amount of interest in our genetalia

* Alcar shrugs. There's generally some grain of distorted truth in such sentiments. Just cause it's stupid doens't make it necessarily not true. Tho this is a poor example :)
* Alcar finds that what is true is seldom as important as what is believed to be true.

<Jeramias> I've had an idea though!
<Jeramias> But I don't want to reveal it
<Jeramias> because if it doesn't work, then I'll feel dumb
<Alcar> It's ok, Jer. You can't feel dumber than I already think you are!
* Alcar should write pep speeches!
<Jeramias> haha :P

<|337C4Bb4g3> Thomas has been pretty well verified, though, from what I've read
<Tonitrus> lol
<|337C4Bb4g3> well, not really, but it's more verified than 3 of the original biblical gospels
<Tonitrus> ... you're joking?
<|337C4Bb4g3> matthew, I believe, has pretty much been proven to be fake
<Tonitrus> ... You're not joking.

* Alcar just believes it's a mistake to hold firm beliefs. And sometimes I don't believe that.

<Tonitrus> I focus on contradicting people so I don't contradict myself all the time.
<Tonitrus> (Honestly, I tend to disregard anything Alcar says for at least 5 minutes)
<Tonitrus> After that point, if he hasn't contradicted it, I absorb it.

<Tonitrus> |337C4Bb4g3: Btw, you are evil. Your nick breaks with protocol.
<aslhk> Tonitrus: so does yours!
<aslhk> R-e-t-a-r-d-e-d-m-o-n-k-e-y-d-0-0-d is too long!
<Tonitrus> aslhk: ... no it doesn't.
<|337C4Bb4g3> lol
<Tonitrus> ...

actually I don't believe in god so I'm sort of envious of sin

<Alcar> heh. I'd love to have a PhD so I could come accross an accidentr "Let me through! I can help - I'm a doctor!"
* Alcar looks at the body. "Shit. Marlowe died this way..." Officer: "What do yo reccomend?" 'I don't know. I thiik Marlowe died at the time., but they didn't havew ambulances back then.... did you know that Tycho Brahe died because he wouldn't go to the washroom during a speech and his bladder burst?" officer: "WHAT?!"

* Alcar changes topic to '|| Welcome to #Religion || In the interests of political correctness, all references to deities must now be be in the following format: 'G(g)od(dess)((e)s)' Thank you.'

<alshk> I am interested in the having-to-pee sensation
<alshk> like, pain generally feels the same along muscles and whatnot
<alshk> but when you have to pee, it is a different sensation entirely!
<alshk> lke we have this unique sensation for telling us "HEY, D00D J00 GOTTA GO!"
<alshk> and I think that is strange
<alshk> but also, I think if I could learn to pay attention like I pay attention to my bladder, in times like that,
<alshk> I would be The World's Most Attentive Person!

<alshk> |337C4Bb4g3: no! Quitting irc is a bs!
<alshk> You say "Quitting irc will help me get a job!"
<alshk> but getting a job would help you get a job more!
<alshk> Why do two unpleasant things when you can just do one!

if you are arguing that because our animal instinct says to hurt people, that that makes it right, then you are beyond redemption

in islamic law u have to cut off the hand of a theif but in times of famine this law was removed.... tempporarily cos ppl would steal food

You can call conditioning punishment, if it makes you feel better

<TehW00ter> xyz_abc: stop trying to find pretty pictures that say what you want it to say--that is not a "crime rate" chart. It is a total crimes chart.
<TehW00ter> xyz_abc: YOU ARE A DECEIVER!
<Losing_Hope> tehwooter stop accusing ppl of stuff
<TehW00ter> Losing_Hope: stop accusing me of accusing people!

<Losing_Hope> so r u ppl of USA saying that all that i've been hearing about the increased crimerate in US is all crap?
<Losing_Hope> hmm... will have to look into this
<Alcar> Losing_Hope - It's just because the police are better funded now. The more police you have, the more crimes are commited

I base all of my arguments off of strict logic, so it's not a matter of them being right or wrong, it's a matter of whoever I'm talking to being logical or illogical

<Tonitrus> jbc: ... See, here's the problem... If you say "Yes", then it certain religious beliefs become more or less illegal. A safer bet would be to simply give the Doctors authority to do whatever they see fit... which could also be risky...
<Tonitrus> And so on and so forth.
<jbc> Tonitrus: you mean I can tear my firstborn's heart out with an obsidian blade and offer it to quetzalcoatl?
<jbc> my religious practices aren't illegal any more?
<jbc> yay!
* jbc wonders if any ancient practices involved paedophilia
<Tonitrus> jbc: You've got this annoying habit of making things I say look stupid. I wish you'd stop that.

* aslhk pictures children in the middle east learning to write terrorism threats rather than traditional letters
<aslhk> every kid would get an organization "pen pal"
<aslhk> that'd be rather funny

<Alcar> haha
<Alcar> the Ripper could have been Anyone Living In London (with the possible exception of the victims),
<Alcar> that would be twisted....
<Alcar> use something like the haitian :"zombie" drugs, have someone "kill" you, then return, kill them and kil lots more, become a serial kiler no one will suspect!
<Alcar> witness reports of you would assume it was a ghost or something :p

<Alcar> Saddam's mouthpiece 'seeks surrender'
<Alcar> Former Iraqi Information Minister Mohammed Saeed al-Sahhaf is attempting to surrender to US forces, according to a London-based Arabic newspaper.
<Alcar> But Al-Sharq al-Awsat says the Americans have refused to arrest Mr Sahhaf - who became a familiar face during the war with his upbeat assessments of Iraqi military "successes" - because he does not appear on their "most wanted" list of 55 former regime officials.
<Alcar> http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/middle_east/2986459.stm from the bbc
<Baliadoc> lol
<Baliadoc> how is he not on the list!? he's an insane information minister!
<Alcar> I know.
<Alcar> Isn't that seriously wacked out? :p
<Baliadoc> yeah... that's really just bizarre.
<Baliadoc> i mean, that doesn't make sense at all
<Baliadoc> "Yup, we went through all the trouble to knock down this regime, but we only really want 55 people from it."
<Baliadoc> it's like the fucking tryouts for some demented version of American Idol.

<Alcar> "And since we don't have Saddam - he's hiding with Osama in the white hourse - we will pick ONE lucky contensent of the 54 of you to be our SCAPEGOAT of the WAR!" *ringing bells*
<Baliadoc> hehe, that's exactly what's happening, too!
* Alcar pictures it as a wrestling ring :p
<Baliadoc> i'm sure it'll be on fox this fall
<Alcar> Reality tv series
<Alcar> "Who will crack under the pressure first? Who will be voted out of protective custody and fed ot the angry mob?"
<Baliadoc> "I'm an Iraqi Scapegoat!"
<Baliadoc> it's gonna be hosted by Ari Fleischer. Unfortunately, that means we'll never actually know how the voting is going until after the other stations show us what happened the night before.

<Alcar> Heh. I doubt there'll be another big war soon, tho. It hurts ratings :p They show it instead of regular programming, lose money and comericals.
<Alcar> Which is one of those weird things I never thought of .. was in the local paper when the war began
<Alcar> The people reporting it lose revenue....
<Baliadoc> that's true
<Baliadoc> although honestly, the big networks can avoid some of the small stuff by sluffing it off onto their subsidiaries - the MSNBC's, the Fox News's, etc.
<Alcar> I wonder what would happen if a war interputed ratings week....
<Baliadoc> that's an interesting question...
<Alcar> the news becomes anti war :p
<Alcar> And the celebrities protest like mad when thye realise the oscars will be cancelled!
* Baliadoc thinks hollywood is a lot like professional wrestling
<Baliadoc> all the agents get together, and decide who should look anti-war, and who should look pro war.

<Alcar> Brace yourselves
<Alcar> Twinkies contain *real* food and will not last forever
<Alcar> http://www.snopes.com/food/ingredient/twinkies.htm
<Alcar> :p
<Alcar> . According to lore, Twinkies have multi-year shelf lives and remain edible for decades; this incredible longevity, rumor says, is due to the fact that Twinkies are not actually food but rather some strange type of artificial, manufactured item shaped and flavored to resemble a cake-like offering.
<Alcar> Twinkies gained notoreity in American jurisprudence in 1979 when the media widely misreported the claim that Dan White, on trial for shooting San Francisco mayor George Moscone and city supervisor Harvey Milk, asserted that his consumption of junk foods such as Twinkies "had left him with diminished capacity for reason."
<Alcar> According to Hostess, it takes forty-five seconds to explode a Twinkie in a microwave.

<aslhk> SnailSlug: improve yourself!
<aslhk> Self-improvement--the road to happiness!Q
<aslhk> Stop hanging out in the boonies and get back on the highway! Behold the power of metaphor!

<aslhk> I am all in favor of suicide
<aslhk> why waste the time and energy to live if you aren't going to enjoy it?
<aslhk> it seems so, well, wasteful. If you're pondering it, I suggest you go through with it immediately.

<aslhk> I hate seeing people like that
<aslhk> (not suicide attempting people, though they irk me too!)
<aslhk> people who believe that, because they have a "disorder", are incapable of being happy
<Alcar> Most people have trouble with happy :p
<aslhk> sometimes telling them to commit suicide helps =P
<aslhk> but mostly it helps me! :D

* Alcar admits Sandicas' idea of how to enlighten would be fun to try tho :p
<Alcar> "Nothing is true! Truth is relative! All we believe are lies!
<Alcar> "And because of that, I can only enlighten you with lies! The government is there to help people! The world isn't flat!"
<aslhk> LET GO OF THE TRUTH AND YOU WILL FIND IT!
<Alcar> hmm, and as for agnotical enlightenment.. hrm .. "I don't know if this is true. I'm tellking it to you on the off chance you know. Or don't know. Or something like that."
<Alcar> "Open your mind! Be free! Let your brains fall out!"
* Alcar could become a prophet of Sandicas!
<aslhk> "now, this may or may not lead to enlightenment." as he prepares the electro-shock-therapy machine

Like the t-shirt says, if you love something, let it go. If it comes back, keep it. If it's one of your kids, make sure you're prepared to explain things to the police.

* barking_frog chcukels
<barking_frog> wow... two typos in one word :-)

The bible is against sex because everyone knows that, while God made Adam and Eve, the devil clearly made the genitalia

what does god say about the existence of god?

<Jeanne`> God says...i am making two different sexes..BUT dont look at each other, and whatever you do, dont touch each other
<Alcar> The bible might say that, Jeanne. However, the bible is not God.
<Alcar> And to believe it is is a form of idolatry :p
<Alcar> Which, ironically, the bible forbids.

<Jeanne`> ok...OM...this is what I think
<The_Ordinary_Man> brb
* ChuckChillout watches a plague of locusts devour barking_frog
<Jeanne`> just when i am going to give of my wisdom..he goes brb?
<Jeanne`> LOL
* Alcar warns barking_frog about the plague, but also hardens his heart so he will ignore the warning!
<ChuckChillout> haha
* Alcar never, ever understood that bit. Poor editing, I think :p
<barking_frog> Jeanne`: he's not intersted in wisdom... he's got his answers all worked out. He's just leading you to the conclusions he wants you to have

* oh^jay has joined #religion
<oh^jay> your all brain washed
* oh^jay has left #religion

<GI-JohnDG> yo
<Kantizuni> y0
<GI-JohnDG> tell me about jesus
<Kantizuni> He's just this guy, you know.

<Sex> I think she h8s me :<
<Sex> But I guess I'll live
<aslhk> she thinks you h8 her =P
<Sex> lol
<aslhk> I don't think she h8s you
<Sex> I don't :<

<Chaos`^> Doc wake up
<Baliadoc> i am awake. that's the problem :)

* Alcar chuckles. When it comes to money, we all believe the same religion
<Jeanne`> i c
<Alcar> Forget who said that, tho :p
<Alcar> think 'twas mark twain
<Jeanne`> well..i gotta say, i believe money has an energy with it
<Jeanne`> and i certainly believe in abundance
<Jeanne`> and i believe abundance is present always
<Alcar> except where prohibited by law
<Jeanne`> dont think that makes a difference

<Sex> some smartass included the fbi warning with this divx movie
<Sex> ;b
<Alcar[writing]> divx?
<Sex> it's a compression format, heh
<Sex> It's a digital pirated copy!

<Sex> how do I get it to change the filenames, then?
<Sex> it won't let me mv!
<Sex> is there like an exec() function?
<aslhk> you can use back quotes or system()
<Alcar[writing]> var %newname % $+ $filename
* Alcar[writing] watches mirc script meet perl and waits for Sex's hd to implode
<aslhk> both are often interpreted by bash
<aslhk> lol Alcar[writing]
<aslhk> that is almost a valid perl statement =P

<kentari> I want rules to exist. And I want to break them.

<Gaia_Paladin> you don't see many things that pay even the slightest reference to God
<Gaia_Paladin> or Religion for that matter
<Alcar> besides life, you mean?
<Gaia_Paladin> wha?
<Alcar> as a reference to god

* kentari wishes there was more tantricness in his everyday life

<Tech-Sensei> okay guys, here's somethign for you
<Tech-Sensei> cthulhu has crossed the line
<Tech-Sensei> he sent an email to my university claiming I was pirating books and anime, so they killed my connection for awhile and I had to pull strings to get it back
<Tech-Sensei> When you make a direct attack on someone's internet connection like that, it's. Too. Far.
<Alcar[food]> ..
<Alcar[food]> Cthulhu reports for pirating?
* Alcar[food] thought it just destroyed sanity

<Gemm> A few easy steps, by Gemm.
<Gemm> 1) Cool Down, take a nap, or read a book.
<Gemm> 2) Tell said person that you are angered by this, but instead of being usual self and blowing up about it, you will just shrug it off.
<Gemm> 3) After a few weeks/days and finally getting access codes to a scud missle, launch it towards said baddie.

The fact that people actually GOT MONKEYS TO TYPE ON TYPEWRITERS TO SEE WHAT THEY WOULD DO is a testament to the utter retardedness of humanity

I dont know, and I am not really worried about it. I vote pro choice until I grow a uterus.

<|337C4Bb4g3> I am sleeping in a sec
<|337C4Bb4g3> have to recover my corpse first ;b

<sylvander> jesus, who can think with all these popups ;/
<Alcar> Moses: "I don't know. Part water isn't helping me get through them."

speaking of the antichrist, my dad had this really funny experience the other day. My grandma's church needed new chairs, so they asked him to find some and get a price on them. Taking into account the vast amount of chairs they needed, and the prices he could get for bulk, he called her back with the cheapest deal. What was it? $666.

<Keith> your not funny like alcar is are you aslhk?
<|337C4Bb4g3> lol
<|337C4Bb4g3> Not, his sense of humor is quite different
<aslhk> nope! I am happy, but not homosexual

<Keith> aslhk I go around in a black leather trench coat black hat and if i've been out side long enought dark glasses
<Keith> you don't get much more disturbed looking then that!
<aslhk> lol
<aslhk> yes you do!
<aslhk> Looking like a single, white muslim does the trick

<christrape> but i dont want any at this point in my life
<Purple-Jet-Baby-Pilot> that makes sense
<christrape> i wanna have sex because it feels good
<Purple-Jet-Baby-Pilot> i'm sure you do.
<Purple-Jet-Baby-Pilot> but when your body wants sex..it's trying to perform something here.

oh..sex is awful...but the FEELING is great.

i HAD to learn to multitask after a year or so of using IRC

i'm quite naturally slender, my body has that kind of 'hourglass' figure to it...and i'm half asian...( trust me, this adds to the adrogeny). another thing....i have to 'kind of' fake cellulite...sort of...guys don't have that kind of natural fat.

<Bite_it_you_scum> how come when I think about jesus I start to tingle
<Alcar> Bite_it_you_scum - It's an Epiphany.

science shouldn't be restrained by doubt

the power of science is endless

Your argument is like a doughnut, circular with a big hole in the middle.

<christrape> "Religion is an attempt to escape responsibility" Jean Paul Sartre
<Alcar> Science without religion is lame; religion without science is blind.
<Alcar> Einstein
<christrape> he should have said spirituality
<christrape> =P
<christrape> A physicist is an atom's way of knowing about atoms. George Wald
<Alcar> Spirituality is just religion naked.
<Alcar> - me ;p

<christrape> you want to see a fucking skelleton of a polar bear giving birth to a whale?
<christrape> that is a logical thing

<christrape> i dont read much
<christrape> i just use my brain

<christrape> "Crossing the species line"
<christrape> this is not a real line!!!!!!!
<aslhk> christrape: it *is* a line
<christrape> no it isn't
<aslhk> something *had* to cross it at some point for those creatures to *exist*
<aslhk> right?
<christrape> no
<christrape> the line desn't exist

<christrape> we aren't all clones
<christrape> so evolution is true

<Tonitrus> I'll eat them.
<Tonitrus> I hate children.
<incogitoIII> Then why eat them?
<Tonitrus> Because.
<Tonitrus> If you just kill them, they'll rot.
<Tonitrus> The only thing worse than snotty kids is rotting snotty kids.

<kentari> During the whole Iraq thing bush sort of ignored korea lol
<kentari> His foreign policy is like how I played Age of Empires: always attack a greatly weaker nation with no good allies

* petrel has joined #religion
<petrel> hello all u...
<eode> hi
<petrel> u...
<petrel> where is everyone
* petrel Quit (Read error: Connection reset by peer)

<Tonitrus> It reminds me a bit of "Can God make a rock so big that it turns into a giraffe?"
<Alcar> lol. Neve heard that one before.
<Alcar> Tonitrus - Yes, because God invented Canabis :p
<Tonitrus> Alcar: I ranted about it one day in here. "Can God make a rock so big he can't lift it" doesn't actually make any sense.
<Tonitrus> I.e. "So big he can't lift it"
<Alcar> Adam: "That doesn't look like a giraffe." God: "Try some of this." Adam: "Wow! It IS a giraffe!"
<Tonitrus> And then he created Eve so Adam would have someone else to argue with.

hmmm... do chicks dig guys who wanna be chicks?

<petrel> When we abolish the slavery of half of humanity, together with the whole system of hypocrisy it implies, then the "division" of humanity will reveal its genuine significance and the human couple will find its true form.
<petrel> name that philosopher
<barking_frog> George Carlin?
<petrel> no

NRA are pretty harmless, really. Much like cancer.

<alcar> ChuckChillIzout - Cute link. I like the Moody Bible Institute myself.
<alcar> the Funky Bible Institute'd be neat, too
<ChuckChillIzout> I got there off some kooky thing that was marketing the 'sayings of jesus' to the hip, alternative crowd
<ChuckChillIzout> the cool kid's bible
<ChuckChillIzout> they needed that a long time ago
<alcar> "In the beginning, God was like, The Man, and He made the earth in like, 6 days, which was way cool. And He banished Satan, saying "Who's your daddy now?" and kicked adam and Eve out for being liberals."
<ChuckChillIzout> haha
<ChuckChillIzout> you're hired!

<alcar> Due to inborn depravity, males often need little or no training to abuse their power; it is their default setting.
<ChuckChillIzout> "their power"
<ChuckChillIzout> laff
<ChuckChillIzout> I'm going to start referring to my unit as "the power"
<Alcar> "He shall rule over you" from gen 3:16 apparrently.. basically male dominance and stuff. The article blames it on the Fall :)
<Alcar> http://www.christianitytoday.com/ct/2003/002/5.50.html
<ChuckChillIzout> oh, that's not about masturbation
<Alcar> LOL. no :p

* TassPassedOut has joined #Game1
* SnailSlug sets mode: +smellingsalts TassPassedOut
* TassPassedOut borrows SnailSlug's rapier wit to go spread some butter
<SnailSlug> I had a rapier?

<Chaos`^> AAAAAH!!! A conspiricy!!!
<aslhk> how can you be bored when you're spouting off conspiracy theories?
<Chaos`^> You're all fucking crazy and you freak me out!

<Cypheriel> being God would own
<Cypheriel> give enlightenment to the world leaders to get their act together and do the world peace thing already
<Alcar> nah, won't happen
<Alcar> because one enlightened they'll realise the necessity of war. And stuff.
<Alcar> Especially the and stuff part.
<Cypheriel> necceity of war :P
<Alcar> of course. We need it because of Satan. He'd point out that all it takes is one Bad Person and you have ot have war, and hey, don't you *want* to be that bad person? And everyone else has to have War, too, or you get to annbilate them. All for the price of one measley soul!
<Cypheriel> done

<aslhk> but does boredom feel hot to you? =P
<Alcar> not normally, no
<aslhk> okay!
<aslhk> I can't seem to recall a time when I was bored but not feeling hot =p
<aslhk> but I seem to be playing tricks on myself lately =P
<aslhk> so I imagine I will remember as soon as I forget to make myself not remember =P
<aslhk> hrm
<aslhk> I can tell my bed time is approaching =P

Quit (Quit: The term "that time of the month" takes on a whole new meaning when your girlfriend is a werewolf.)

<__nihilist> that is a flaw in our society, we are too empathetic towards animals
<[francesca]> We are not empathetic enough - that is our flaw.

<Alcar> hey kant. Up early/late too?
<Kantizuni> yeah... =/
<Kantizuni> Up late. heh
<Kantizuni> I can't sleep, so I figured I just won't. ;)

<aslhk> also, I am looking into the viability of buffering my income through writing "inspirational fiction" for religious people =P
<Alcar> "Why You Are Right And Everyone Else Is Wrong"
<aslhk> no, like "The Time My Grandma Died And God Helped Me Through It"
<aslhk> or "How I know God is With Me At All Times"
<aslhk> "Christian Living In A Secular University" =P
<Alcar> "Grandma died and god was with me. Damned bugger wouldn't leave me alone. GKept asking about my feelings, and refusing to explain WHY He couldn't have helped her, and why He didn't answer her prayers & said stuff about rocks to heavy to kift and turning them into elephants. And I kept asking "Why?" Why me? why her? Why did you do this to us? And finally He got fed up, and said "Why NOT?" and reminded me oif Job. The end.
<Alcar> That's what I'd write :P
<aslhk> perhaps this isn't a viable option for you =P

<GeminiRai> Happy chee day
* Alcar nods. Blessed the holey day of Swiss.
* GeminiRai holds hands in prayer stand and nods solemnly
<Alcar> blast you. Now you;'ve got be pondering magickal implications of "Say cheese" to cameras :p

* Alcar was ded died 5 hours ago . .now wide awake
<GeminiRai> I was ded died too...but luckily the neighbors washed my hair
<Kantizuni> i want to dye-tie my body.
<GeminiRai> I wonder if you could get someone to tie you into knots
<Kantizuni> that would be nifty
<Alcar> dead, even :p
<GeminiRai> so you were dead died then?
<GeminiRai> what sense does that make?
<Alcar> dead tired.. heh. my typing is toast :p

<Chaos`^> oh cool
<Chaos`^> there's a horse outside my window
<Julius`> there's .. a man outside mine
<Julius`> brb

One time my mom asked why I cant seem to do my homework, but I do everything thats expected of me at work. I told her its because work pays me. She said the school pays me with an education and I diploma. I said I'd rather have money.

<Alcar> hrm, being an atheist and meeting God would be cool....
<Alcar> "Hah! You gave us insufficient evidence of Your existence!"
* Alcar thinks it would be entertaining.
<Alcar> God: "You don't count yourself and the universe as proof I exist?"
<jbc> the point is
<jbc> how would you know that it's not some poser just *pretending* to be god?

the pearly gates are just a giant toaster oven so they can enjoy a crispy cheese-and-soul sandwich

<jbc> damn, that'd be scary
<jbc> a universe retroactively created by an omnipotent schizoid personality to create a place and host for itself
<Alcar> jbc - Damn. I think you solved the reason for existence.
<aslhk> well, at least we know!
<aslhk> now we just have to write it down and ask for donations.
<aslhk> jbc: I'm satisfied! It explains the duckbill platypus and feet!
<jbc> aslhk: give me money
<aslhk> jbc: no, no, no, you're going about it all wrong!
<aslhk> jbc: You're collecting money for a *therapist* to attempt to treat God so we can make sure that he doesn't get better!
<aslhk> preferably a freudian therapist =P
<Alcar> God's therapist is a man named Stan "I removed the first a because it made people uncomfortable" Lightbringer.

<Tsume[zzz]> #FuckYouWorld is my official channel.
<Alcar> adding a r to the you would be more amusing :p
<Kentari> :P indeed
<Tsume[zzz]> I'm not out for amusement, twits =P

<Alcar> God: "I want to get over my whole Old Testament image! People see me as aliving, kind deity now! How can I do this?"
<Alcar> Therapist: You could start by not creating gold to pay me and destabailizing the ecnomy."
<Alcar> God: "But it's so easy!:"
<Alcar> Therapist: "You're a deity! You shouldn't take the easy way out!"
<Alcar> Therapist: "Now go out there and get a job!"

<aslhk> Therapist: "Now tell me about your mother..."
<aslhk> Therapist: "Ooooh, one of Those People..."
<aslhk> Therapist: "Were you a bottle baby?"
<Alcar> God: "I was before there was a was to be and before there could be a before. I an ancient of days! I was around before ime!"
<Alcar> Therapist writes down 'ego problems, superhuman complex' and gives God Neitzsche to read. The universe implodes.
<aslhk> no self-respecting therapist would be so concise
<Alcar> True :) Shall we continue, then? :p
* Alcar likes being the voice of god :)

<paranoea^> With or without religion, you would have good people doing good things and evil people doing evil things. But for good people to do evil things, that takes religion.
<paranoea^> Steven Weinberg (1933 - ), quoted in The New York Times, April 20, 1999
<terbo> and with or without religion, you'd still have god :)

<MechaBlue> It would be an interesting project to try to determine the appearance of the world based upon which giant corporation wins
<MechaBlue> Wal-Mart would be a fun starting place
<Alcar> Sort of like Happily Ever After Or Else world
<MechaBlue> Not really
<MechaBlue> 1 in 5 people would work
<MechaBlue> Well, as slave labor
<MechaBlue> Everyone else would be scrounging to buy cheap crap that breaks by the time it gets home
<MechaBlue> 20% of the remaining world's population would be secretly living in the Sporting Goods section of the monolithic stores
<Alcar> what stores? It's all be one big store.
<MechaBlue> Exccept for the factories
<MechaBlue> And warehouses
<Alcar> true. They'd be in the "staff only" part.
<MechaBlue> The staff would be made up of people with brain damage, aggression disorders, and social dysfunctions
<Alcar> and who doesn't fit into one of those? :p
<MechaBlue> Very few fit into all ;)

<Reykemias> gah
<Reykemias> what do you do, if not listen to music?
<Alcar> rey - read :P
<Reykemias> eww
<Reykemias> reading's icky

<Alcar> Free ram today! Join the Free Ram campaign ..... "Weary, tell me will you use me / When wrong, will you fre me / When lost will you need me? / But they told me that ram should be faithful / And be filled whenever able / And fight till the end but I'm only memory "
<Alcar> "Everyone taking control of me / Seems that the world's / Got a use for me I'm so confused / Will you speak to me you'll be there for me / And care enough to need me / (Hold me) (use me up slowly) / (Softly then boldly) (Oh, baby, there) / (Hold me) (love me and feed me) / (Fill me and free me) (I will feel blessed)

<Chaos`^> it's disabled cart
<Chaos`^> so we have to do something like "I live off of my kids"
<Chaos`^> maybe something like "Retards: Infecting the gene pool since 1561"
<Alcar> "Oreos: 90% sold to 10% of poulation. You do math, dumbies!"
<Alcar> real fact, too :)
<Chaos`^> I don't like oreos that much =p
<Alcar> good. have trans-fatty acids so more fat than claim. Which bad. Save money for oreo, but kill customer faster. Business efficiency.
* Alcar see oreo spiked with viagra... "die faster, produce more comsumers."

<Chaos`^> alcar's also not using pronouns...
<Chaos`^> You are alcar... right?
<Alcar> that stupid question.
<Alcar> who else me be?
<Chaos`^> Not alcar?
<Chaos`^> hrm.. ok.. alcar.. define a pronoun for me then!
<Alcar> Alcar not alcar, too. Sometime. Settle by saying: all dummy.
<Alcar> Noun that no longer amateur?
<Chaos`^> The hell is this engrish?
<Chaos`^> I've got it! You're on drugs!

<Chaos`^> on you're computer, at about 2-3 in the morning, who was on it
<Alcar> chaos - Uhm, should have been no one. RL took longer than expected.
<Alcar> why?
<Chaos`^> 'cause
<Chaos`^> someone was on your computer
<Chaos`^> talkin' bout... uhm... I dunno what
<Chaos`^> FWIW he spoke in engrish and pretended to be you =p
<Alcar> What is engrish?
<Chaos`^> is when talk borken use words not use in english
<Alcar> what mean? English english. Descent of man as language, dumb dumb!
* Alcar grins
<Chaos`^> something like that
<Alcar> Not the same?
<Alcar> Damn.
<Chaos`^> so like I was saying, who was on your computer last night?
* Alcar blinks

<MechaBlue> US Foreign Policy: How can we get men to stop blowing each others' heads off?
<MechaBlue> US Domestic Policy: How can we get men to stop blowing each other?

* Farthes just preorded HL2
<Alcar> helium2? For when helium one just isn't enough for your universe?
<Farthes> halflife 2 smartass =P
* Alcar blinks. Ok. Never knew there was a first one.
<Alcar> Shouldn't it be called quarterlife or something then?
<Farthes> ...
<Farthes> lol

I'm starting to get muscles in my chest, it's kinda weird :P

<aslhk> in my criminology class
<aslhk> they had this d00d on *laugh* and he said something about "myriad cases"
<aslhk> but he said the my like the "my" in "my super|337 hampster"
<aslhk> and the reporter d00d said, "What was that?"
<aslhk> he said "myriad. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to use too big a word for the audience."
<aslhk> and smirked
<aslhk> (mispronouncing it again)
<aslhk> it was pretty funny

<aslhk> there was another guy who was in jail for threatening the president *laugh*
<aslhk> he said he was investigating the prison systems, and when he came out, he'd cost them millions of dollars! :D
<aslhk> *laugh* he just sent in a letter saying "I am going to kill you, mister president"
<aslhk> because it gets you like a five year sentence on average
<aslhk> and he wanted to investigate the prison system =P
* Alcar sends one to the president of the bowling league.

* Alcar nods. 's funny, really. They say that the people in prisoners are often uneducated and lower IQ, but they always seem to be able to make those really neat weapons
* aslhk nods
<Alcar> ooh! It's survival techniques. Darwinism in action!
<aslhk> yeah! *laugh* they are pretty neat looking
<Alcar> "How the survival of the lower class proto-ape proves darwin right"

<aslhk> I could move to canada! =P
<|337C4Bb4g3Cabbage> aslhk: Don't do it!
<|337C4Bb4g3Cabbage> You'll be eaten by a polar bear!
<aslhk> moving to canada is a pain in the ass anyway =P
<|337C4Bb4g3Cabbage> And have to sleep in an igloo!
<|337C4Bb4g3Cabbage> seattle is cooler, anyway
<aslhk> |337C4Bb4g3Cabbage: but i'll be SAFE!
<aslhk> |337C4Bb4g3Cabbage: canada is far cooler =P
<|337C4Bb4g3Cabbage> no, it's chillier
<|337C4Bb4g3Cabbage> and chilly has never been cool!

If there's one thing I've learned in life, it's that sex solves everything!

<Tsume-chan> We're all insane
<|337C4Bb4g3Cabbage> I'm not
<Tsume-chan> And schitzophrenic
<|337C4Bb4g3Cabbage> And I have a Psych degree to prove it

after math comes sex ed which by that point in time is already to late

<Alcar> All discussion boils down to emotions.
<Alcar> Intellect is just fancy window dressing.
<virgio> False.

"All the world's a stage, and I want to operate your trap door!"

I've found that if you just talk to people in a boring tone for about an hour and then ask to have sex, they'll say yes to get you to shut up!

<Kitsune[Soldat]> The window that's hidden off the screen providing you with the endless supply of porn pop-ups!
<Kitsune[Soldat]> Someday, someone'll learn that annoying someone with unavoidable windows is not the way to successfully advertise.. >_>
<superp> *laugh* someday you'll learn that the people who pay for pr0n are not the people who are annoyed by pop-ups
<Kitsune[Soldat]> And someday you'll come up with an excuse for me to care about the last six line's you've written.

* Chaos`^ would never play poker with clinton =(
<Chaos`^> he has to be good at anything that has the name 'poke' in it.. especially if he thinks it means "Poke 'er"
* Kitsune[Soldat] groans
* Kitsune[Soldat] slaps Chaos`^ around a bit with a large trout
<|337C4Bb4g3Cabbage> I would!
<|337C4Bb4g3Cabbage> Then I could brag about having had group sex with Clinton!
<|337C4Bb4g3Cabbage> Er... well, not WITH Clinton, but, you know, with him present
<Kentari> You could write a book about it
<Kitsune[Soldat]> "My fellow gaymericans"?
<Kentari> Like Hillary did :P

<|337C4Bb4g3Cabbage> Anyway, oral sex isn't inherently amusing
<|337C4Bb4g3Cabbage> It's the concept of Hillary having sex that's funny

<notazombieyouesperbastardfucks> omfg
<notazombieyouesperbastardfucks> I don't have to job hunt any more
<notazombieyouesperbastardfucks> That's even better than having a job!

<|337C4Bb4g3Cabbage> Make no mistake; file trading and mp3s are highly illegal, just like raping the President while making counterfeit money in your meth lab that was constructed with the bones of your murder victims. We live in a society that abides by rules and morals, and listening to mp3s violates just about everything our culture holds sacred.
<Alcar> what if you JUST rape the president?
<Gemm> Then its not like file trading and mp3s.

<|337C4Bb4g3Cabbage> I hereby declare 'sexuality' to be a non-issue!
<Alcar> it might be someday :P
<|337C4Bb4g3Cabbage> That would be cool
<|337C4Bb4g3Cabbage> It would save me quite a bit of annoyance ;P
<|337C4Bb4g3Cabbage> And many urges to destroy people for idiocy above and beyond the call of duty
<aslhk> if people would just take my advice it could be a non-issue within the next hundred and thirty years or so
<aslhk> STOP HAVING BABIES!

<aslhk> most people are too retarded to do anything!
<aslhk> so what's your point?
<aslhk> why blame the labels
<aslhk> it's the people who are the problem!

<aslhk> that's why I can't believe islam managed to take root in india *laugh*
<aslhk> I mean, yes, the muslims were violent fucks bent on conquering and that generally helps people out
<aslhk> but when you have on one hand the religion with lots of miracle workers
<aslhk> and on the other hand the religion of violent fucks who can't do anything special
<aslhk> which would you choose!?
<aslhk> I mean, sikhism and buddhism both have lots of |337 people
<aslhk> I don't understand the islam thing, though =P
<Alcar> aslhk - being a violent fuck IS something special. And being confronted by one would make me realise a) life IS a mircle b) being able to take life is this VF's miracle and c) I want to live :p
<aslhk> Alcar: yeah, but the hindus had violent fucks *AND* miracles!
<aslhk> the sikhs didn't but then changed their minds and did when the muslims decided to slaughter them all =P
<Alcar> Well, duh! I was lying. The REAL reason is so painfully obvious: Islam is right.
<aslhk> Alcar: you know, that almost makes sense =P
<Alcar> lol
<aslhk> in fact, I think it does!
<aslhk> I am going to go convert today!
<Alcar> It explains why they won!
<Alcar> yay!

<aslhk> Farthes: Jesus still loves you! =P
<Gemm> But God hates you.

the counselor at school thought i might have mental problems, but i just think it's conflicting emotions

<zitterbe> This planet is a place where anything alive is only alive because something else has died
<Alcar> and because something else has lived
<zitterbe> Seems sorta fukked up to me

<Alcar> ooh, pop quiz: What toppings go best with each religion? :)
<Tandaco> alc: islam, a mess of non ham products; fundamentalist islam, c4; christianity, blood and some cross shaped bits of fish
<Tandaco> hindu, anything but cow ; buddhist, cheese of enlightenment; pagan, anything you like as long as it doesnt harm and you take responsibility for eating it

<Alcar> A hypocrite is someone who is lying and doesn't believe what they're saying. It's a reference to the godless or the profane. Someone who BELIEVES in their faith and isn't lying about what they believe is, obviously, not a hypocrite. By definition.
<I^ZeppMeister^I> where did you got that information is it from the bible??
<I^ZeppMeister^I> it must be supported by basis
<Alcar> it;s from the defintion of the damned WORD hypocrite. Duh.
<Alcar> http://dictionary.reference.com/search?q=hypocrite
<I^ZeppMeister^I> do not get the definition from other books if you found the word from the bible
<I^ZeppMeister^I> the bible can stand to it self
<aslhk> it's a word the bible uses--if the bible uses the word, shouldn't we understand it?

<Kate`^> "Even on the road to hell, flowers can make you smile." Deng Ming-Dao
<Alcar> "However, even on the road to Heaven, posion ivy is still a bitch." - Alcar

<Kate`^> maelstrom's quote: "When the only tool you own is a hammer, every problem seems to resemble a nail" Abraham Maslow
<Alcar> hehe
<Alcar> ooh!
<Alcar> "When all you have is a scredriver, everyone seems ot have a screw loose" :p
* Alcar is full of wisdom tonite!

<Alcar> At least George Bush as a DM explains some things :p
<Alcar> Most importantly, it says he sucks at cheating on dice, or he'd have *found* those weapons of mas destruction by now, on some treasure table or another!
<aslhk> that is awful =p
<aslhk> maybe he is hoarding them!

How long was it that you chased the snake so you could shove it in a plastic bag?

<aslhk> they have "Bible Man" action figures at the book store here!
<aslhk> including the "Satanic Cultist"
<aslhk> complete with goatee and whatnot
<Alcar> satanic cultist? LOL!
<Alcar> Bible man, bible man, does whatever a Chrisitan can. Says a prayer, any length, look out! He comes with pamphlets, man!
* Alcar can't recall the rest of that theme song :P
<aslhk> I've never heard of it before
<Alcar> the spider man, spider man, does whatever a spider can, spins a web, any size.. from the really old cartoon.
* Alcar 's brain connected it to bible man
<aslhk> ah *laugh* I thought it was a real theme song for Bible man!
<Alcar> That'd just be horrible :)
<aslhk> if you saw the back of those action figure boxes
<aslhk> you'd think it likely as well =P

<Kantizuni> christy: I cannot hide beneath your bed of shame.
<aslhk> Kantizuni: y not!?
<christy> That's true, you probably wouldn't fit.

<Mukuru> "The kidnappers mailed you his ear." "Well, at least we know he still loves us!"
<Mukuru> "And his middle finger." "We're not paying."
<aslhk> alcar would be fun to kidnap
<aslhk> he's got a good sense of humour =P

* Alcar snickers. I could see someone kidnapping astand up commedian "We don't have enough laughter in our lives, so we got you."
<aslhk> MAKE US LAUGH, YOU ASSHOLE!
* aslhk brandishes the wiffle bat

<Alcar> "Tomorrow, it is going to be hot and rainy, followed by brief showers and clear skies along with a UV of 1 to about 6, or so, aheavy rains and lots of sunshine! Be sure to wear your snow suit."
* Alcar grins. weather prediction as horroscopes would be neat...
<Alcar> "The weather today is moody, and worried about your job. There is family trouble ahead and you might not get the promotion you want." = storm is going to blow ove,r with some possible high winds and a cold front
<aslhk> "The wind is *pissed* at taurus today. The great bull in the sky made some rather rude comments last night. I suggest all taurus wear protective eye goggles if they intend to go outside."
<Alcar> "Scorpio was having fun with Cancer behind Taurus' back last night, so it's going to fucking storm you asshole! I know you slept with her! RAIN! HURRICANE FORCE WINDS YOU PIECE OF DOG CRAP. Note: All scorpios will be stuck by lightning twice today and are all going to DIE!"

<aslhk> today, in class, we were talking about this silly personality tests they give to people to find out if they're craaaaaaaaaazy
<aslhk> and the instructor said, "I've been giving these tests for years now. A lot of the people will come back and say, 'Wow! I didn't think anyone knew me that well.' when they read the results."
<aslhk> at this point, I couldn't restrain myself.
<aslhk> "Just like those personalized horoscopes!" I say
<aslhk> He gives me a funny look, and then says, "Yeah."

<Drizzt> dont yawn its contagious
<Tech-Sensei> i know
<Tech-Sensei> and i can scientifically prove it

<{{Kobi}}> well you are in a religous chat line, taking cracks at people, go figure
<{{Kobi}}> arent we all here to find the same thing?
* Alcar doesn't know if there is anything to be found.
<aslhk> Alcar: try not eating for a week or so!
<aslhk> then you'll know!
<aslhk> People have religious experiences all the time when they have no food!
* Alcar tried. I kept having visions of a golden M.

it's good to have polite drug dealers

<Alcar> Actually, there *is* something funny aboout beastiality.
<Alcar> Well, if it involves hyenas

<midnight_tulip> so i'm the rose among the thorns!
<midnight_tulip> juz kiddin'
<Alcar> hah! women are all venus fly traps!
* Alcar learned that watching Jerry Springer
<Alcar> Oh, and reading the Bible, if we gotta bring religion into it
<midnight_tulip> venus fly traps?
<midnight_tulip> men!
<midnight_tulip> they're all chauvanist pigs!

The part that horrifies me is what do parents to when their troubled teen comes back not only a "better person" but a better one than they are..... The whole boot camp idea is scary.. Parent (P) says "Fix my child" (C)... C starts getting fixed. P doesn't like it .. it upsets whatever unspoken rules/.mokita/dynamic the family has going and fights it . .because the problem isn't JUST in the kid.

<aslhk> sure, it's not one hundred percent effective, but a lot of "miscreants" do shape up and thrive after bootcamp
<aslhk> while it's possible those who don't thrive are "incurable", I doubt it =P
<aslhk> you just have to be willing to administer hallucinogens and whatnot
<barking_frog> aslhk: frankly, I think you'd be one of the incurable ones :-P
<barking_frog> aslhk: it's very much in the nature of your personality to question, explore, wonder, etc.
<aslhk> I think with hallucinogens and starvation, they could get me!
<Alcar> how well DOES that take, though, over the long term?
<barking_frog> aslhk: I think if you'd gotten royally fucked over in your growing years, a military regime might be able to turn you into a zombie, but it could never turn you into what you are now
<aslhk> Alcar: it only takes a moment to change someone's life forever
* Alcar eyes aslhk.....
<Alcar> very funny :p

<SilverHorse> A serious sea ship?
<Alcar> for soime reason I think the word fox's work
<Chaos`^> got it
<Chaos`^> I got a name ;D
<Chaos`^> Wavedragon
<kentari> yea highwave as in highwind
<kentari> The Leviathan :P
<Alcar> Turkish Delight. Get confused as a desert....
<kentari> "TURKISH DELIGHT SWALLOWED BY SEA MONSTER!"

* Alcar should point out that demolay freemason can be angramed to DOOMSAYER ENFLAME and thus it is obvious that DAEMON FEARSOMELY DEFAMES MONOLAYER, and monlayer is A layer of cells one cell thick, grown in a culture. and cells are obvious reverences to secret organisaytions bent on damaging culture and is 16 charactes long and 6-1 =5
* Alcar should also point out silverhorse can become shrivel eros and is 11 characters long ( 1+1=2 11/2 is 5.5), that silverhorse is a country band (that in itself being evil) and country band is 12 characters long and contains 2 words (2 +2 +1 = 5)

Everyone IS bi given enough alcohol

As my friend says, "morals" and "ethics" get in the way of just boning any old chick.

<Awakening> No wonder most guys have such problems
<Awakening> 1) Learn to control your libido
<Awakening> 2) Learn to become multiorgasmic
<Awakening> Not necessarily in that order

<AlcarGM> I know I suck, I know I'm bad, but life's a joke and I've been had .... I'm just a slob - I know it's true .. ButI killed god so screw you! I killed god, yeah, I killed god, burned him out of my brain with a cattle prod!
<FirestormZero> hhaahaha
<aslhk> lol AlcarGM
<Chaos`^> where did you get that alcar?
<aslhk> Chaos`^: he made it up!
* AlcarGM just made it up :p
<aslhk> you can tell *laugh*
<aslhk> burned him out of my brain with a cattle prod? =P
<aslhk> that's totally alcar =P
<AlcarGM> I tried to kill, my self to die, but I know I can't it was just a lie - I don't want to go not into death I'll fight it ot my very last breath - cause I killed god, yheah, I killed him, I might be a lohb but I killed god. And I know there;s nothing in the end, no bright light and no old friends, it's all empty and nothing's there But a wish for a God who isn't there...

The winner is the one who gets to laugh when its all over

<typo> "The logical extention of business is murder."
<MarcFen{BBL}> How do you figure that ?
<typo> oh, is from a book I'm reading
<typo> Makes a fun twisted sort of sense, though.
<typo> At least, in the modern world. Capitalism as anarchy, destruction as creation . out with the old, in with the new.
<typo> Easiest method to deal with the old is murder. Shoot the dog. Get rid of the problem.
<typo> think there's some japanese provberb that business is war, as well....
<MarcFen{BBL}> "Tsu Sungs Art of Corperate Finance"

<Reykemias> hmm
<Reykemias> but murdering the government officials would bring more chaos than anarchy
<typo> actually murdering the government might bring order back :p
<typo> Or at least a good party.

* Alcar sings "I'm just a singer of stupid songs / I'm not a real religious man / I read the Book but I'm not sure I could / Tell you the difference between Cain and Abel / I thought i knew Jesus or talked to God / but I remember from when i was young / Fire, brimstome and soot are some bad things he gave us / and the greatest of them is Judgement Day"
"Where were you when the world stopped turned that cursed, cursed day? / I was in the yard with my wife and kids / while people vanished in LA / City of angels that was savefd, I thought it was a joke /. Prayed to God it was a lie / I shouted out in anger, hated all my Ratured neighbours / and wished thatn I could die
"Did you weep for the children that lost their dear loved ones? / I wondered what God didn't know /. turned those nucleasr families into rubble / And leaving those orphans down below / watching them cry because they'd been left, cry until they turned blue / and we looked to shrinks for answers they were doing what they dod / and I looked to the paper for answers / and look to myself as if I could have mattered

the problem is that people think that if their problems are solved they will be happy =P

<Alcar> I dunno, to me it seems that sadness is the core of things if we really look at them .. we can't trick ourselves into believing things like death, or disillusionment don't exist or that the world can go on without us just fine....
<Alcar> those things don't *have* to make you sad - lots of religions turn them into Happy things....
<Alcar> hrm, maybe that's the point of those religions :p

<mazarin> the voters support doesn't seem to count for much over there when the guy who didn't win the election becomes president
<skanksta> thats how our system works
<skanksta> checks and balances

<Reykemias> mother always said that when the girls teased me it was because they liked me
<Reykemias> i never thought a server would do the same :P

<Apsu> Alcar: Define 'religious'.
<Alcar> the "why" behind everything.

<MikeyMikeMikeMike> personally, I think the "why"s come after =P
<MikeyMikeMikeMike> but I guess it depends on whether you have some god-thing who is responsible for everything
<Alcar> LOL. True. monkey see, monkey try and explain WHY monkey did what monkey do :p
<MikeyMikeMikeMike> lol
<MikeyMikeMikeMike> absolutely
<MikeyMikeMikeMike> there is no WHY without sentience =P

<SnailSlug> Do you think modern war would be balanced without ships/boats of any kind?
<kentari> ... what?
<kentari> :P If neither parties had boasts, of course it would be

God knows best. Good or Bad, God knows best.

<ahamanatma> define:God
<Capt_Trips> ahamanatma: The One that is what He is, and chooses to be.
<Capt_Trips> ahamanatma: the egg, man
<Capt_Trips> the whole egg